I’d decided to try to pretend that I was on a date with the warm- hearted and gentle guy I’d first thought he was.
I figured it’d be the only way I could pull off the feat of acting like I was happy or even open-minded about being in his company.
I didn’t think I could pull off acting like I was happy to be sitting here with Azriel Clarke, the guy who had done all those awful things to me.
So I tried, instead, to rewind the clock in my head and pretend that the gorgeous hunk who I’d swooned over when I first saw him in the plane hadn’t morphed into the sadistic criminal who f****d me against my will and had ripped my life to pieces with the snap of his fingers.
I decided that this wasn’t the guy who’d spanked me, getting off on my pain, who’d tricked me into s*x and then forced s*
