Forsaking His Luna

Fated

Miriam

I had no words for what I was feeling at that moment. I had just marked Arthur, and he marked me too.

It all happened so fast; after making love in front of the fire, I asked for some water, and as soon as he left to get it, I followed him, incapable of being away. We f****d in every corner of the house; now we are both out of breath, lying on the floor side-by-side in the upstairs hallway. We never made it to the bedroom.

I desperately needed to breathe and rest, but at the same time, I never felt more alive. Arthur set my soul on fire; he always had that effect on me, only now it was more intense.

Our connection evolved to a level that terrified me and excited me simultaneously. I knew how he felt and vice-versa.

Arthur loved me unconditionally and was scared for my safety and our son's.

Our son, my baby, I felt a squeeze on my chest.

"What is it, love? Is something wrong?"

He sensed my need to see my child. Starring at the ceiling, I tried not to let emotions control me.

"Lucas, I miss him."

"I would like to meet him if you let me."

His tone told me he felt he was walking on thin ice. It made me want to laugh, but I held it. My sense of humour always chose the worst possible times. He deserved to know Lucas; I wasn't going to deny him that, ever.

I had a slight smile on as I turned to face him,

"I think he would like that..."

Arthur's eyes shined like a child on Christmas morning.

"Really?! What's he like?" The excitement in his voice made it impossible for me to resist getting excited for them to meet.

"He looks a lot like you, except for the eyes."

"He has your eyes?" he had a big proud smile.

"Yes, he does."

"Since I discovered he existed, I have been trying to imagine his looks. I always picture him with your eyes in every image that comes into my head. I bet he's handsome."

"He is... Arthur, are we... fully mated?"

With the change of subject, his demeanour changed from relaxed to tense.

"Yes, we are. You are mine, and I'm yours. I don't know how it happened, but it did. I swear I tried to stop it, but I couldn't... and then, you bit me too. Do you regret it?"

"I... I had no control and I wasn't ready for this. It was stronger than me but at the same time..."

"What?" He asked, his tone anxious that I would say I wanted to reject him.

"At the same time, I wanted you. The need to be with you overpowered all the pain I've been through."

I felt his anger rise. His facial expression let nothing through, but I could feel it, the regret he had always felt.

"Miriam, I didn't expect you to accept me after everything I have done. But I can promise you that from now on, you can count on me for everything." Not knowing how to react, I just nodded, slowing my emotions.

"Arthur, I don't know if I'm ready for this commitment. I have been on my own for so long. Do you understand that it might take time for me to return to the way it was? If that is possible at all!"

"Of course, I understand... I will do whatever it takes to show you that you can trust me. I have things to tell you, Miriam, and I also want to know what happened these past years."

I sat up, suddenly feeling anxious about our conversation.

"Hey, shhh... it's alright. We have time for that tomorrow." He got up and picked me up in his arms. Incapable of denning his touch, I let him carry me to his room.

He sat me at the end of his bed and covered my shoulders with a blanket. Kneeling in front of me, he cupped my cheek with his hand, speaking softly to me.

"Would you like to have a bath?"

"Yes, but I can go to the other room." I offered. I wanted to stay, but at the same time, I thought that maybe Arthur was trying to be nice. He gave me a hurt and gentle smile.

"Please, just today. Let me take care of you. None of us can rest if we stay apart tonight." I just nodded, agreeing with him.

After all, he could sense my genuine emotions, and I could feel him through our bond.

Happy with my answer, he kissed my forehead before heading to the bathroom and giving me a great rear view of his muscular body.

His body changed. Somehow, it got even more appealing than I remembered.

It literally gave me goosebumps to think about how we had s*x just minutes ago, and the need for each other was out of this world.

I was only with another person during these five years Arthur and I were apart.

Even though I had a great connection with the guy and the s*x was incredible, I chickened out of the relationship before it got too serious. The guy was mysterious and travelled a lot, and I was thankful for that. Dealing with feelings was the last thing I wanted back then. I shook those thoughts away.

With Arthur, everything was intensified, the need for each other, his touch on my skin, it was even better than I remembered.

Arthur came from the bathroom without a word, picked me up bridal style, and carried me inside.

He lowered himself with me in his arms in the comfortable deep wooden bathtub.

The warm water relaxed my muscles, and I felt tired and ready to sleep from our intense lovemaking. I took a deep breath, enjoying the feeling.

"Mi, don't take this the wrong way. I'm just curious. Who were you thinking about a few seconds ago?' I tensed. I wasn't about to tell him the details, but why would I lie to him? I had nothing to hide or be ashamed of.

"Why do you want to know?"

"Because I felt your regret and sadness. But also gratitude..."

"You need to stop reading me. Honestly, it is too much..."

"Sorry, can't help it...Only if I was blocking you on purpose wich I wasn't..." Exhaling, I sat and turned around to face him, hugging my knees to my chest. The bath is deep enough to prevent our bodies from showing.

Arthur looked at me expectantly.

"Okay, I was thinking about someone who use to be important to me."

He nodded for me to keep going, not showing any emotions.

"I met a guy two years ago. A civilian who came for intense swimming training. He had to learn to swim in the open ocean. Our relationship was good. I didn't want anything serious, and he was away for long periods of time. It was perfect for me, because the last thing I wanted was commitment. But one day he came back and said he wanted to have a family with me, that he wasn't going to leave anymore, and for a moment, I thought it would be possible to have a family with him."

I stopped talking and looked at him, expecting to see anger.

"It's okay Mi, continue." I was surprised by his calm demeanour. If he was angry he wasn't letting it show.

"Can't you guess what I did?" He shook his head.

"He proposed to me, he loved Lucas like he was his son. He was so perfect that in my head, it was impossible to be true. I kept thinking he would just abandon me one day, and he would not only break my heart, but also Lucas's. So I ended it before I allowed him to make me happy." Arthur, who had been quietly listening, spoke calmly.

"And you regret it?"

"I regret hurting him and giving him hope for nothing."

"Did you love him?"

"I did, but it was different... he was my best friend. I think I have never allowed myself to think of love since you and I parted ways."

He was looking down and nodding as I finished talking.

I was lighter after I told him all this. He finally looked at me.

"Miriam, I'm sorry I kept ruining your life over the years. I always wished that you had found someone who took good care of you and made you happy." My eyes filled with unshed tears.

"It's done now. It doesn't matter." I whipped the tears from my face and spoke calmly. "It's your turn, do you have someone? If I remember correctly you were to be engaged."

He tensed, probably remembering our last conversation.

"Well, I... Technically, I'm still engaged. It's all a farce. But it's a long story. I promise I'll tell you all about it tomorrow. You look tired."

He was still engaged. How was I supposed to react to that? Somehow, I wasn't surprised. I expected him to be married by now. I am too tired to talk or listen to it right now.

"Fine, we'll talk tomorrow. I'm so tired."

He nodded at me, opening his arms for me to scooch closer.

"Let me look after you, Miriam. Please. I need you."

I let him wash me, dry my hair and take me to bed.

I lay on his chest, breathing in his scent and feeling calmer and happier.

Even if we don't work out everything tomorrow, at least we had tonight.