All Of Me (Book 3 of Lastor Series)

Chapter 10

After two weeks of forced monotony under Rick's orders, he finally deemed me fit and able to return to my practice, but only on six hour shifts until my shoulder was fully healed.

When I finished doing my rounds around the camp, visiting the patients in the admission tent and giving them the souvenirs I brought back during my trip, I headed to the cafeteria where I was told Rick was and found him at a table with the other doctors. Dr. Fasner, as always, was making no qualms in her blatant flirtations with him. In the past, I would probably rip her face off and then break Rick's nose or maybe cry in self-pity but these days, I was just used to the attention he got for being so damn f*****g beautiful. They could appreciate him as much as they want, they just gotta keep their hands to themselves.

I caught Dr. Fasner slap Rick's arm as she laughed about something he said and kept her grubby little hand on there. I went up to the queue, grabbing a tray and just letting my fury wade through me as I asked for a cup of rice. Selima, one of the local volunteers, and I chatted as I went along the queue, and I gave her the coin purse I bought for her with the word "**" stitched on it. I explained it was the meaning of her name in Cantonese, which made her smile so widely her dimples became more prominent.

Rick came to me as I was choosing between beef stew or roasted chicken and he wrapped his arms around me from behind, burying his nose in my hair. "Your murderous intent is spilling out, gorgeous."

I pursed my lips. "Sakhidh lahmi albaqar." (I'll take the beef.) Selima scooped up a generous helping of meat into a bowl and I laughed. "'Ant tufsiduni." (You spoil me.)

"'Ana bihajat li'iiteamuk. 'Ant nahif jiddaan," she insisted. (I need to feed you. You're too skinny.)

I snickered, taking the bowl from her. Rick took my tray and grabbed my hand. I rolled my eyes, going to the water dispenser and filling up a cup before letting him lead me to a vacant table.

"How's your shoulder?" he asked as he sat beside me.

"Fine." I shrugged, ignoring him playing with my hair. He seemed to miss it longer than I did. "You should go back to your friends."

He was staring at me as I ate. "Will you quit that?" I arched a brow, biting onto a piece of meat. "I'm too crazy about you for you to be easily threatened by other women."

I took a sip of water, swallowing my food. "I'm not threatened. It's just annoying."

"Do you want me to avoid them?"

My brows furrowed and I tilted my head to look at him. "No. They're your colleagues and it's not productive to avoid interaction with them. As long as they do their jobs and don't cross the line, I can stand it."

He eyed me intently. "You say that but you look like you want to go over there and crack Dr. Fasner's skull."

I grinned. "Oh, I do, but you told me I can't give in to my rage outside the bedroom so I'll just f**k you stupid later."

Our guards who were sitting at the table beside ours broke into a fit of coughing and choking over their food. Rick rolled his eyes, not looking amused. He's grown too used to my vulgarity that it's become a rarity to elicit shock from him these days. I found it to be an amusing challenge, especially how it annoyed him.

"You need to take it easy until the injury is fully healed," he chided, failing to inconspicuously check my pulse rate as he held my wrist. It's become a habit of his to sneakily conduct physical exams on me.

I shrugged, carrying on eating. "I can f**k you stupid with one arm."

He sighed, reaching over and grasping my chin. He shifted to straddle the bench and I parted my lips when he leaned closer but the i***t kissed my nose instead. I was going to f**k him stupid on the table if he didn't cut the s**t.

"My break's over," he murmured, bringing his lips over mine and giving me a chaste kiss. "See you around, gorgeous."

I glared at the sight of a smug grin on his smug face. He was about to get up but I pulled him down to me, gripping the collar of his scrubs and kissing him properly. He sighed, sliding his arms around my waist and pulling me onto his lap. I shifted to straddle him, parting my lips as his tongue met mine. We bit at each other lightly, teasing. I glanced at the table of doctors from the corner of my eye, zeroing my gaze on the flirty Dr. Fasner as I nipped at Rick's bottom lip and smirking when she averted her gaze before walking out of the cafeteria.

"b***h, you better run," I muttered under my breath.

"Mean girl," Rick whispered, kissing my chin.

"If you weren't so damn beautiful, I'd be nicer."

He drew his head back, wrinkling his nose. "Why do you always have to call me that? I'd prefer hot stud." I snickered, shifting and weighing down on him. He inhaled deeply, squeezing my hips. "Quit it. I can't have an erection while I'm seeing patients."

I placed a quick kiss on his lips, grinning. "You're too easy, Doc. Better watch yourself."

"Only easy for you, gorgeous." I was about to kiss him again but he drew back, laughing as he lifted me off his lap and setting me on the bench. "Later. I have to do rounds."

I rolled my eyes while he just smiled, kissing my temple before leaving the cafeteria with his security team following behind him. He had been resistant to having his own team at first but after I compromised with hiring former army medics, he agreed as long as they helped around and didn't get in the way of his work.

My pager beeped and I took a glance at it, reading the code. I walked out of the cafeteria and my guards took their positions. The OR was a small hurriedly built room the size of a broom closet with hollow blocks for walls and a roof that I was sure couldn't stand a sand storm. It was situated at the edge of camp and was a sorry excuse of an operating room, hazardous too what with the wires connected to the generator hanging around in the open. Ever since the bombing at the hospital where LF doctors and nurses were originally stationed, we had to make camp until reconstruction was finished, which wouldn't be for another few months.

I met with Dr. Stein at the tent that they’ve turned into a makeshift dressing room. He was the Director of Surgery and I worked under his command. He briefed me with the case as I changed into a pair of scrubs and sterilized my hands.

"Code blue. Male. Early thirties," he said. "Multiple knife wounds. Severe blood loss. Threat of cardiac arrest is imminent. He's unresponsive."

I nodded, holding back from asking what happened. I'd learned quickly that the less I knew, the easier it was to take a death. As we entered the OR, I took a deep breath and casted away any other thought from my mind and focused solely on the task. I took in the bloodied man at the center of the room who seemed to be half dead already and said a quiet prayer for me and the team, also him. It didn't matter that there was no God. Even if there was, he had long forsaken these people.

***********

I stood beside Dr. Stein, translating his words into Arabic, as he relayed the facts to the patient's family with half assed sympathies to disguise our mutual indifference.

The patient didn't make it. He'd gone into cardiac arrest half way through the operation and we couldn't pull him back. Too many vital organs and arteries were punctured. Too much blood was lost. It was just too damn much. But I had this gnawing voice in my head that said we still could have saved him. We just had to let this one go so we could save the next one.

A life was lost because we weren't able to give him everything that he needed. I knew it for a certainty. Dr. Stein knew it. The entire team in that f*****g tent knew it. But we didn't say it. We couldn't say out loud that we failed not because of our incompetence but because we just didn't have the resources to spare for a potential lost cause. And that sucked the most because what's the use of having an outstanding staff if they didn't have the means and tools to perform to their extent?

The patient's family cried, wailed, and asked their God why this happened. He had just been selling the Syrian delicacies his wife and mother made to help support their household. He was a good man, the wife claimed, and was an upstanding member of the refugee community here in Sidon. Their two young children were crying too, asking what was happening to their Papa. Why their Mama was crying.

I translated every word to Dr. Stein and he listened, taking it. He'd been the one who made the call to stop operating and resuscitating. It was his duty to bear with their grief and even though I personally considered him to be a condescending righteous prick, I respected his commitment to the profession.

Eventually, the family gathered their bearings and thanked us for doing our best. Dr. Stein didn't say anything to that, neither did I.

"You're not going to berate me?" Dr. Stein said as we were changing back into our clothes in the dressing tent.

"You know what you did," I replied, stepping out of the partition and taking a seat in one of the benches. "There's no point in repeating facts you're already aware of."

He huffed, coming to sit beside me and pulling on his boots. "But you think I made the wrong call."

I shrugged, lacing up my boot. "In a normal setting, you wouldn't have had to make such an unethical decision but this is where we're at and he was costing us too much. Long term wise, it was the only call you could have made."

"Yes, I agree," he said, pursing his lips. "What are you doing here, Dr. Lastor?"

"b***h, don't start with me right now," I muttered, yanking my laces tightly.

He chuckled quietly, staring at the ground and clasping his hands together. "I have spent nearly twenty years with Lastor Foundation," he replied, his voice quivering. "My parents were among the first team of doctors in the Outreach Program. I believe in our cause as they did and I mean no offense but ever since Joseph Lastor passed, LF hasn't done any remarkable difference internationally at all. They send us out to places with barely enough resources to last the entire mission. All of us here could practice in a more stable environment and get better pay but we're here because we believe in the ideals your grandfather championed. We want to help those in need but with the way things are, we're just watching people die."

I sighed, pushing myself up and taking out my electronic cigarette from my jacket. "You're barking up the wrong tree, Doc," I muttered, heading out of the tent.

"Do you even care about these people?" he demanded as he followed me out.

Javier pushed him back. "Ease up, Doctor," he warned.

I touched his shoulder and he stepped aside. "Will my care ease their suffering?"

"No, but your wealth and influence can," Dr. Stein replied as he looked around us, watching the worn down and stressed out staff pass us. "You're a capable surgeon and you never falter in the face of a crisis, whether in the operating room or outside of it. With more time and experience, I don't doubt you'll rise high in the field." He turned his head to look at me, his appearance more aged than the fifty-something man he was. "But as a doctor, the few you help will always be outnumbered by the many you can't. As yourself, you could change all these people's lives for the better. So why are you here?"

I stepped forward to close the distance between us and he seized speaking. Seized breathing. Seized blinking.

I took a drag from my electronic cigarette, exhaling the fog of smoke through my nostrils. "Who do you think you are to question me?" I asked in a hush voice.

He pursed his lips, turning his head away. "Instead of using your authority to lord it over someone insignificant like me, you should use it for a better purpose."

"Purpose?" I echoed. "What purpose would that be?"

He faced me with unwavering resolve. "To help these people."

"To what lengths?" I pressed. "End the war ravaging their motherland? Provide them all with employment and proper housing? Establish stable healthcare systems for them?" I tilted my head, folding my arms across my chest. "Why? Suffering will not end in the rest of the world. Chaos will always erupt. Dissidents will continue to rebel. Time and time again, we as a people kill and f**k each other over. Things like peace, equality, satisfaction, and painless existence are ideals only achieved in death. My grandfather spent decades in pursuit of those ideals but he never achieved what death can."

"That is no reason to ignore the suffering of those in front of you," he insisted vehemently. "Would you let a child on the street get run over by a truck if you can reach them?"

I arched a brow. "Of course not, but that is a fallacy and beside the point. You're equating one life needing one act to be salvaged to hundreds of thousands of people who will need time, commitment, strategy, and vast resources to be salvaged."

"We both know you have the means, Dr. Lastor."

"Just because I can doesn't mean I should," I replied flatly. "My grandfather taught me that. I never liked that principle but when you're a person in my position, every act you commit has a magnitude of consequences. You see what's in front of you and that's okay but I can't do that. I have to see through everything in the present and find the closest possibility of the future. Your decision cost a man's life today. My decisions can affect the world order. The liberation of the poor and suffering is a hopeless cause, and I'd prefer to not anger a shitload of war freaks by meddling in their affairs without their invitation."

"How can bettering the treatment we provide to our patients affect the world order?" he countered incredulously.

I clenched my jaw, considering it. "It won't but it will be a bother to do."

He looked at me with clear disdain. "You'd let these people continue to suffer because you can't be bothered to do anything about it?" he spat.

I leaned closer, narrowing my eyes. "You're frustrated and have been nurturing a growing hate for your inadequacy," I said softly. "It's been dormant up until now but ever since meeting me, all that you lack has become more evident. You see my authority, wealth, and influence, and wish you had them. You imagine if you were me, you would make a paradise out of this world but you're not me so you're pleading with me to do it for you."

He seemed uneasy, taking a step back and averting his gaze. "What's wrong about wanting to do good for the people in need?" he defended. "As someone who was born into a privileged life, you are more-"

"No," I cut in. "Don't mistake the lap of luxury I was raised in as the reason behind my possessions. Being a Lastor may have given me a head start in life but I used my own abilities and tenacity to give weight to my name. Everything I am and have, I worked hard to earn them. Unlike you, Peter, I'm not satisfied with relying on others to achieve my goals." I moved to stand in front of him, locking my gaze with his. "If you want something done, do it your own damn self or give me something to make it worth the bother. Otherwise, f**k off with your righteous indignation, you insignificant little man."

I walked past him, taking a long drag from my electronic cigarette. I was rounding up to Rick's ward when I saw him walking out of the tent with Dr. Fasner. They seemed to be in a serious discussion as they inspected a clipboard Rick was holding. Dr. Fasner leaned closer, holding onto Rick's arm while pressing herself against him. He tried to put distance and remove her hand by subtly adjusting his glasses but the w***e wouldn't take the goddamn hint. I sucked in a breath, grasping my healing shoulder and squeezing it hard to use the pain to keep myself steady.

One of Rick's guards patted his back and whispered in his ear. Rick snapped his head up to look at me, pulling his arm out of Dr. Fasner's serpent-like grip. I marched over to them and Rick met me halfway, wrapping an arm around my waist.

"Control," he whispered, holding me tightly.

"I am," I said calmly, slipping out of his arm and going to Dr. Fasner.

She blinked nervously up at me, glancing behind me for help. I reached for her face, cupping her cheek with my palm and sliding it down her throat. She tensed and started shaking, her breathing coming out in trembling gasps as I gently placed my hand flat at the base of her throat. How easy it would be to rip open her chest cavity and tear out her insides.

"Angel, please," Rick whispered, coming to my side.

I sighed, consciously suppressing my violent urges. "I've been merciful and patient," I murmured softly in a quiet voice, removing my hand off her and bringing it to my lips. "You're all such helpless, weak, and pathetic creatures. I didn't want to disrupt the simplicity of your little lives by unleashing myself upon the lot of you, but... I'm realizing now that you people have misunderstood my leniency for inferiority." I leaned forward, bringing my face a breadths inch from hers. She gasped, flinching. "You've perceived me to be your equal. Perhaps even below you. It's not your fault. I should have made myself clear from the beginning."

I stuffed my hands in the pockets of my jacket, embodying the character of Angel Lastor as I stared her down. She shook before me and lowered her gaze to the ground, submitting so easily it was pitiful.

"You will no longer enjoy my mercy nor my patience." I spat at her feet. "Now get out of my sight."

She turned and ran away, crying. Rick was about to go after her but stopped, turning to face me with a look of disappointment painted on his face.

"You didn't have to do that," he said in dismay. I tilted my head, gazing up at him through half lidded eyes. He faltered but quickly recovered, his disappointment replaced by annoyance. "You're gonna use that trick on me too?"

"No, my love, the trick was me acting submissive to spare them from my true nature," I said softly, narrowing my eyes at him. "I will not be mocked, Rick."

"God, it's not even about me, is it? It's your ego," he said in disbelief. He scoffed, shaking his head. "I don't have time to humor this tantrum. Go apologize."

I clenched my jaw when he was about walk past me. "And take away her hard earned chance to have a big strong shoulder to cry on?"

He grabbed my arm, dragging me away to a secluded area. "We were just talking about the flu cases," he hissed. "What you did was unprofessional and completely out of line."

"The w***e's been throwing herself at you for weeks," I hissed back, yanking my arm out of his grip.

"Don't call her that," he chided. "She hasn't been throwing herself at me. No one is. You're just letting your jealousy put malice in every little thing."

"Don't make it out like I'm being crazy," I snapped, closing the distance between us. "I can practically taste her desire and desperation. She clearly wants you and you're encouraging her to pursue you by not establishing boundaries."

He scoffed. "Boundaries? You f*****g go around seducing people for a living. Who are you to talk about boundaries?"

I swung my arm, my fist connecting with his jaw. When I realized I had laid my hands on him to harm him, I panicked instantly. "Oh god," I whispered, staggering back. "I'm so sorry."

I took a deep breath and thumped my fist against my shoulder, gritting my teeth as the pain intensified. When Rick took a step towards me, I shook my head, striding towards the parking lot.

"Watch me, guys," I whispered, curling my hands into fists as my fingers trembled. "Don't let me f**k up."

My guards' stances shifted, becoming firmer and more alert as they moved closer to me. I could hear Rick calling out my name and I quickly hurried to the SUV. Leonardo went ahead, opening the backseat for me.

"Stop f*****g running," Rick bit out, grabbing the back of my jacket.

I slipped my arms out of the sleeves and climbed into the backseat. He came after me, grasping my leg and dragging me as he pushed me down. I tried push him off me but he was too f*****g heavy and I didn't want to hurt him.

"No, no, get away," I cried, straining to keep myself together. "I hurt you. Don't touch me."

He shushed me, pinning me down and wrapping his arms around me tightly. "I deserved that. I was being a d**k," he said, pressing his face against my neck. "Calm down."

I screwed my eyes shut, clenching my hands around the front of my shirt. "I can't be in control right now," I whispered. "I just lost a patient and my head's a mess. Please get away from me."

"I'm sorry," he murmured softly. "Do you want me to-"

I kicked at the car door. "I want you to get the f**k off me, babe. Seriously."

He sighed, pulling back and opening the window. "Brody, could you tell Dr. Bay I'm leaving?"

"I don't want you near me while I'm like this," I hissed.

"I'm not leaving you alone like this," he countered.

I gritted my teeth. "Fine, but you're not riding with me."

"Okay." He grasped my thigh, squeezing it. "Just don't hurt yourself again."

He got out of the car and Leonardo got in the driver seat. I instructed him to blast the AC to maximum coldest temperature while I stripped my clothes off, letting the coldness numb me and ease the rage making me want to tear myself apart. When we reached the mansion, I hurriedly marched to our room and ignored Padme and Buster excitedly welcoming me. I had to calm down first.

I went into the shower, setting it to the lowest temperature and bracing myself on the wall is the icy jets of water battered against my skin. I focused on my breathing, keeping them deep and taking each one in between long intervals while emptying my mind. I lost awareness at some point and only came to when I realized the water had stopped and sensed Rick's presence. I turned away from the wall, finding him standing outside the stall.

"You're wasting water," he said quietly, offering me a towel. "Use the pool if you still need to."

I didn't respond, wordlessly taking the towel and drying myself off. I went out to the bedroom and he just sat on the bench at the foot of the bed while I sat at the vanity, brushing my hair mindlessly. I was still so unbearably angry.

"I'm sorry," he suddenly said. "I should have said something to her but I never know how to handle it and I didn't want to make it into a big thing. I've just learned to ignore it and focus on the work."

This goddamn saint.

"You're too complacent," I replied, untangling the knot in the ends of my hair. "Just because you're a man doesn't mean you have to bear with unwanted advances, especially in the work place." I paused, setting down the hairbrush. "Or is it that you want her advances?"

"Of course not," he said in offense. "But I've already dealt with co-workers thinking I built my career through my friendship with your brother. I didn't want the team to think I can act high and mighty because I'm engaged to you."

"I'm sorry if being engaged to me is such a hassle," I countered, fighting the urge to break the mirror as I stared at my reflection.

"Goddammit, don't do that," he bit out, leaning down and clutching either side of his head. "You know that isn't what I mean."

"I am a violent, short-tempered, cruel, egotistic, and vengeful person." I rose to my feet, going to him. "For you, I can be kind, understanding, patient, generous, and, with great effort, even gentle." I stood between his parted legs, slipping my fingers through his hair. "But there's only so much I can bear and when it comes to you, my control is limited."

He grasped my hips, pressing his forehead against my belly. "I'm sorry."

"You're so beautiful," I murmured, pulling his head up. "It isn't your fault others desire you for it." I cupped his cheek, brushing my thumb over the darkening bruise I'd made with my fist. "She's everything that I can never be, like so many other women. You go out the door and you can easily meet someone better than me. I have been with royals, billionaires, movie stars, rock gods, top tier athletes, s*x fiends, and more, but none of them can hold a candle to you. You are the only man I have truly wanted and if you decide you don't want me anymore, I might ravage this world with my grief."

He let out a harsh breath, his grip on my hips tightening. "Baby, I'm yours."

I leaned down, taking his lips in mine. He wrapped his arms around my back, pulling me closer and I set my knees at either side of him. I reached between us, pulling his c**k free and guiding it at my entrance. I slid him into me, my wetness letting him enter me with ease. I started rocking against him, keeping my pace slow until he hardened completely. I circled my hips, moaning when he pushed up, his c**k reaching the perfect spot.

"You have no idea how much power you have over me," I whispered, fisting my hands in his hair. "You take everything I am and make it yours without even trying. All my life... I've struggled with keeping my mind from being consumed... by the chaos of the world around me but of all the chaos, you... are by far the worst." I hastened my pace, pressing my forehead against his. "You drive me mad and... give me peace, and even now, I still cannot comprehend you. What are you? How can you... do these things to me? Why, for all that I can do and possess, I am reduced to a simple woman when faced by you?" I slammed down on him, gasping and writhing. "When you look at me, do you feel the same? Am I not alone in being made helpless by this... inexplicable phenomenon of you and I? Are you as mine as I am yours?"

"Yes," he whispered, bringing his forehead to my chest. "So..." He gripped my hips, lifting me and bringing me down to him. "Fucking..." He did it again, groaning. "Yours, baby."

I leaned back, grabbing onto his knees as I moved up and down. "Watch me," I whispered. "Watch me f**k you, sweetheart."

His gaze licked at my body, devouring me, worshiping me. I reveled in it, becoming lost in his love and desire. My knees ached and my hips wished for rest but I went further, f*****g him harder until every inch of my body was wracked by agony and gratification.

"Do you love... feeling me... around you?" I said in between breaths as I grew frantic the closer I got. "Do you love... my pussy... choking your beautiful c**k?" I straightened, bringing my hands to my breasts. "Do you love... that all of this... is yours?" I squeezed my walls around him, earning a guttural moan from him. "Do you love... me?"

"You know I do," he said breathlessly.

I grasped the top of his head, using him as anchor. "They can want you but no other woman can have you. Do you understand?" He nodded and I yanked at his hair, bringing his lips to mine in a harsh kiss. "The next time I see another woman touch you as I do, I will not spare them mercy."

"Oh, f**k, I'm gonna come," he whispered urgently, squeezing my hips in his grip.

"Come for me," I whispered back, panting. "Remind me I'm wanted."

He brought a hand to where we met, rubbing my c**t and biting a mouthful of my breast. I cursed, whimpered, and shattered into pieces as my climax came over me. I grabbed onto his shoulders, digging my nails into his skin. As he came inside me, he held me to him, kissing and licking the bite he made on my breast. We melted into each other, exchanging chaste kisses as we gathered our breaths until we just held each other in silence.

"I'm sorry for losing control," I mumbled, drawing notes on his upper arm that reflected the beating of his heart with my finger.

"What I said was uncalled for," he murmured, tracing the feathers of my wings. "Let's say we're even and move on."

"You can tell me to stop," I said, nuzzling my nose against his shoulder. "I'll change how I conduct business if it bothers you."

He sighed, burying his nose in my hair. "Just don't cross the line and I can deal with it."

I pursed my lips. "But it bothers you, doesn't it?"

He kissed the side of my head. "I trust you."

"That implies I don't trust you," I mumbled dejectedly. "I do but I... I get scared. When I see you with someone else, all I can think is how easy it would be for you to love them. Loving me is so hard and exhausting."

He tightened his arms around me, his heartbeat imprinting itself on my chest. "If I wanted easy, I wouldn't have chased after you all those times." He grasped the back of my head, making me look at him. "I don't feel anything when I'm around other women. I don't even think about it. God, look at you." He pushed me back slightly, raking his gaze over me and letting out a harsh breath. "You're... you're a f*****g goddess. No other woman can come close to you. Why would I bother noticing anyone else? It's ridiculous you'd consider there's someone who could compete with you."

I felt my face heat up and I hid myself against his chest. "It's just looks."

"I'm not shallow," he said, chuckling. "But you don't know what it's like, to be around you. You're the most overwhelming person I know. Even though I've gotten used to every part of you, I still get blindsided by it." He held either side of my face, looking at me with an intense gaze. "You're unlike anyone I've ever met. You make it impossible to ignore a single thing about you. I think that's why I don't notice normal people anymore and why I didn't think much about Dr. Fasner's advances. They just pale in comparison to you and there's nothing I see that's worth noticing."

I covered my face, feigning to scratch my forehead. "You're such an idiot."

He took my hand, smiling. "But for all that you are, you're never more devastating than when you're just yourself." He sighed, pressing my palm against his chest so I could feel the fast pumping of his heart. "Loving you is hard and exhausting, not because of the reasons you think, but because I have to constantly bear with being overwhelmed by you." He brushed his thumb against the skin below my eyes, swallowing hard when our gazes locked. "I used to think it was all just a trick supported by your looks but it's really just... you. For the past year, I've had the chance to know everything about you and see every part of you, and there's not a day that I find myself wondering how the hell I convinced you to be mine. When I say there's no one else for me, I don't say that out of loyalty or even love. It's surrender." He licked his lips, shaking his head. "You have me, Angel Lastor, more than you know."

I let out a harsh breath, clenching around him as I felt him grow inside me. "Oh god, you're insufferable."

He smiled, bringing his lips over mine. "Ditto."