Meera
My Parents said I was one of the child who was the most adorable one born in the hospital because people came to see me. Chubby cheeks, white skin, small eyes and best ever smile. I never believed them because to every parent their child looks pretty.
Meeting some of the my aunts made me believe my parents words because the can't believe how i look now. Not that I don't have beautiful features but I care less.
Yes i am now a tomboy who knows nothing about being a girl except the fact that my heart is too kind for everyone around. I am no more that laughing girl but the angrier one, the violent one and above all in pain not to be shared. My Darkest Secret.
I was 16 . I have a Sister and a Brother -I still had not accepted them in my life though they are part of my life since i was 2 and in later case 6. I believed it was my siblings fault that my mom left me alone to face the world and the worst nightmare happened. I never understood what has happened with me until I understood now what happened in my school.
I lived in a joint family who cared less about a year old child whose mother was not in the same place (as I had other cousins ) they hurt me in different ways physically and emotionally. Even when I was truthful no body heard me and end up beating me. Even if it was their kids fault I was the one being slapped.
That was the day I learnt the only way is to lie to not get hurt.
But i was miserable at lying when I was a kid.
My Eldest cousin used to count the pages before giving me a Notebook. I was not allowed to sharp a pencil without there permission and if I lost an eraser i was not allowed a new one until i was beaten up by my class teacher for the mess in my Notebook. Like any other kid during rain I wanted to make paper boat and did same seeing my friends but the happiness ended when i was back to house because my Eldest Cousin punished me and dint provide me a new notebook so I was beaten up in school too.
You might think why was i Suffering so much -Its because my father used to live away from us. And some how even after living with our grandparents we were said that the food and living provided to us was because of my father eldest brother. We were just that way. Mom never took my side or saved me even for the wrong doings. But who am I to complain she lived a more miserable life without my father. No one respected her for her Sacrifices and the day she was gone to her parents home for my brothers delivery things changed for me.
When my mom returned with by other siblings i was changed. I lost my smile and the charm on my face. I cared less about any thing. I started hiding things that were happening with me in my school. I was aggressive now more than ever.