I Will Love You

Chapter 8

The Marquis was a person with many economic interests and knowledge, which made me bored all the time I was by his side, not to mention that he insisted on speaking of himself as if he were the last man in the world, Perhaps you haven’t noticed that there are many in the same room with him. His story about Paris and Cannes was good, but not enough to keep someone entertained as long as he was trying to do. The first chance I had to get away from him, I did...

- Shirley! - I spoke cheerfully to my sister’s friend. - I hadn’t seen you yet...

Shirley gives me a smile, her eyes go all over my dress and then she stares at me with a look of pride. She looked around quickly and then turned her blue eyes focused on me with a whispering smile between her lips.

- You look so beautiful that there is not a man here who is not looking at you right now. - I feel a blush forming on my cheeks. - And the Marquis?

I sigh, diverting my attention to anywhere else, so I can roll my eyes without seeming rude.

- Can I be honest? - Shirley sat guiding me to one of the sofas in the room. - He is a bore...

The woman starts laughing loudly, attracting the attention of everyone, including the so-called French Marquis. As soon as she notices the looks on her face, she quickly pulls herself together and grabs a glass of wine from one of the waiters' trays to calm down.

- Now darling, all men are a bore. - She declares without the slightest concern. - You just get used to it and ignore all the "tediousness" that comes out of your mouth.

Shirley is a very hopeful and witty woman, she makes it clear that she loves her husband, but if she could she would have chosen a richer one to marry, after all "everyone has the same stories, what changes between them is the weight that their name has in the middle of a conversation".

- If you ignore ninety percent of what comes out of that mouth, you will be in love in less than a minute. - You say getting up. - Do you know where your sister is?

- No, maybe in the dining room with the other guests. - I answer by getting up too. - Thank you for the advice.

Shirley only makes a nod, before sneaking among the other guests.

Some people come to talk to me, welcome me, compliment the dress, talk about how nice the party is, some typical conversations about how Spiez evolved over time and blablah, nothing really interesting or that makes me want to be around someone for more than a few minutes listening to them talk.

After finishing a subject I see the Marquis leaving the library, and before he meets me and comes to tell me more about how Paris has a very romantic scene and that I should visit, I go to the piano room. I listen to pleasant notes of some symphony, while I hide among the small group of people who also enjoy music, even if amid some whispers.

I join my hands, watching carefully the movements of the pianist hands. I envy your focus, because with so many whispers around me I would have been distracted and wrong everything, but he doesn’t, he’s focused on what he does, knows exactly every note without even having to look at the keys, the eyes stuck on the leaves in front of him while playing a very attractive symphony, that somehow entertains the people who listen to it.

- Do you like piano? - I recognize the voice next to me.

I stay focused on the attraction in front of me. A hand appears in front of me and then I turn to the man with black eyes and curious next to me, he gives a side smile looking at me.

- From the books you read, it is hard to believe that any man here has had such a good subject, capable of attracting your attention, so perhaps if you give me the honor of dancing with me they will leave you alone, to meet someone who really holds your attention. - Nicholas is justified.

- I’ll have to deny it, I’m trying to impress a marquis.

I turn my attention to the pianist.

- The French? - Assinto.- He only talks about his own work and the place where he lives, you read Jane Austen, you will never be interested in him.

- I know, it is really very boring. - I confess between a low and discreet laugh. - But a friend gave me a very valuable tip, if I ignore ninety percent of what comes out of his mouth, maybe I can get something good out of that narc man.

Nicholas laughs, keeping his hand in front of me.

- Money marriages always end in hurt and unhappiness, didn’t you know that?

- And how do you know that?

- I read Austen.- He laughs relaxed. - Will you accept my dance, or will you want to put up with him telling you how being a Marquis brings great benefits?

- Neither of the two. - I say firmly lowering his hand. - I also read Austen, Nicholas.- I say calmly. - Now if you could just shut up and enjoy the beautiful symphony that this skilled pianist is playing, I would be grateful.

I look back at the pianist, already playing another melody on the black instrument in front of him. I quietly walk out of Nicholas’s side and into the dining room, spot my sister and her friends talking in a secluded corner to the rest of the party, grab a piece of delicacy and sit in one of the chairs, I take the jump for a few minutes by touching my heel the painful sense.

- And the Marquis, Lily? - Katelin asks.

By God, did you come to this party to see him and know him, or to know me?

- She found him interesting! - Shirley answers for me. - Stop asking her about a man, who she is most likely running away from.

- Why did he find it interesting? - Diana approaches, sitting in front of me.

- If we keep talking, he might find me and know that I found him boring. - I try to cut the subject, but the curious eyes of the four women did not let me focus on my candy. - He was not good enough to hold my attention, his subjects are about his noble position and how Paris and Cannes are usually beautiful this time of year!

- Oh dear, but that can change if you give them a chance to get to know each other! - Mary says calmly. - At first nobody looks good, but you will see that when you become a spinster, any miserable look will represent a lot.

I don’t know why, but I’m not scared of the possibility of becoming an old maid. Rather living alone in a beautiful house, with my freedom and my really interesting affairs, than living in a beautiful house with a man who can’t talk about anything but himself.

Diana laughs at her friend’s comment.

- I believe she will not become a spinster Mary.- Diana refutes. - In the worst case she will marry Nicholas.

I take a deep breath, eating my delicacy as I hear the four of you talk about how handsome the marquis is.

As it got later, the house was less full, until there was no one left, only a huge silence and a big mess.

I sit on the couch with a glass of wine in my hands, enjoying that Diana and Sipp were upstairs, enjoying that theoretically I’m alone, since I don’t know where Nicholas is. I take off my heels, putting them beside me, put my feet on the couch, staring at the flames of the burning fireplace.

Mother would have loved this party, seen a great opportunity to find a suitor for her last single daughter. Dad, on the other hand, would have found it silly, although I agree it would have been a golden opportunity to marry someone.

Fortunately parties end, some do not like this idea, but nothing better than silence after so long socializing and walking with people. "You will never know enough until you know what is more than enough," said William Blake, this quote makes me wonder, if ever, even for a second I knew what was enough, or if my whole life I am living below what I would establish as sufficient.