Two Halves of a Whole

Chapter Six

In her dreams Sattira felt different. She was running on her four powerful legs through the woods. She was jumping over fallen trees and splashing through the puddles left behind by the recent rain.

She could tell it was spring by the growth and color of the new green leaves growing on the trees. There were spring flowers growing among the trees and shrubs of the forest.

She could feel the wind blowing through the hair that was somehow covering her whole body. Her face felt odd like it was somehow too long. Her tongue was hanging out of her mouth and when she pulled it back in she noticed her teeth felt large and pointed.

She heard a noise and turned to see a rabbit burst through the underbrush. Without thinking she chased after it. She was darting around trees and almost had the fuzzy little creature when it dove into a small hole.

She stuck her nose into the hole but the rest of her body was too large to fit. She cursed in frustration but the only sounds she seemed to be making were deep frustrated growls. Odd, she thought.

She could hear running water and headed toward the direction she felt it was coming from. The trees thinned out until she found herself on the bank of a stream. She looked down at her reflection but it wasn’t her face she saw. Staring back from where her reflection should be was a beautiful mahogany red wolf with emerald green eyes.

Thank you, I know we are beautiful, said the voice she had been hearing in her head recently.

Wow, I can’t even escape you in my dreams. She was disappointed that the voice was ruining the peaceful dream she was having.

Are you so sure it is just a dream? She wanted to laugh at what the voice was saying.

What else could it be? She gave a snort to further get across how silly the question was only to realize it sounded just like the voice in her head when it snorted at her.

Do you understand yet, The voice asked her. Why did this voice talk in circles? What was she supposed to understand? The voice hadn’t really told her anything. She brought her front paws slamming down on the reflection in front of her in her frustration only to find herself paddling all four legs to get back to dry land.

If this isn’t a dream then what exactly is it, she demanded as she shook the water from the fur covering her body. She was getting agitated and it was seeping into their conversation.

Maybe it’s a memory. The voice sounded so sure of itself and that only fueled her frustration.

How can it be a memory if I have never been here? She snapped the question out. None of this made any sense to her. She was so upset with this voice. She really needed to call her doctor in the morning. The sooner this all stops the sooner her life could be normal again. Not that she minded the part of not being normal that found her sleeping in a king sized bed in a palace. Yes, she finally decided it was a palace. At least that was settled in her mind.

If you would let me get a word in I could tell you that this place is from my memories, the voice snapped at her. This answer only led to more questions.

How can I see your memories? What are you? Sattira was starting to feel like she was starting to get some answers but if for every answer she got she had two more questions nothing would ever be settled. Besides, how well could she really trust this voice.

I am the part of you that you refuse to except. The answer the voice gave was said as if it should be obvious. As if everyone had a voice just sitting in their head waiting to talk. As if it wasn’t a sign of mental illness. As if trying to justify the voice being in her head wouldn’t just reinforce the fact she was suffering from something her doctor should know about. She could end up some story on the news where the voice in her head told her to do something bad and she just listened without questioning it if she wasn’t careful.

Of course she refused to except the voice. But she knew it couldn’t be that simple. She had never heard the voice a day in her life until just recently. How could it be a part of her. And why was she a wolf if this was a memory? She knew she was not part wolf. This had to be her subconscious mind trying to justify the voice. Everyone knew that with all the stigmas surrounding mental illness that no one wanted to admit to themselves that they were ill. But it was just a dream so she would play along. At least it was an interesting story so far.

Just as she was going to ask another question a wolf so light brown it was almost dirty blonde stepped out onto the bank of the stream right in front of her.

She had thought the wolf body she was in was huge but the wolf now standing in front of her drinking from the stream was even larger. She could see his muscles ripple under his thick shiny coat. Did she really just call it a he? It wasn’t like she checked or anything.

The light breeze suddenly carried her scented to him and he lifted his large steel blue eyes to meet her emerald green eyes. There was something so familiar about those eyes.

The breeze changed direction again and she caught the most intoxicating smell. She breathed in deep.

Just before she found where the smell was coming from the images around her started to fade and she felt as though she was returning to her own body. Her last thought before waking up was what a weird dream.

Sattira woke up in the worst pain she had ever felt. It felt like every bone in her body was trying to break at the same time. She tried to stand up and walk to the door only to fall to the floor after taking a couple of steps. She cried out as the overwhelming pain exploded through every fiber of her being.

The pain was so great she didn’t hear the door open as everyone rushed to in to see what was causing her screams.

“She’s burning up. Her body must be fighting the shift,” Nina’s voice sounded far away, muffled by the ringing in Sattira’s ears as she fought to control the pain. The words Sattira managed to make out made very little sense to her.

She screamed again as she definitely felt bones break. She tried to look at her hands but was horrified to see what looked more like misshaped paws with fur the color of her mahogany red hair sprouting out all along her skin.

“Kim, fill the tub with cool water.” Sattira heard Lugos’ voice and her mind tried to latch on to the sound as somehow is seemed to ease the pain, if only just a little.

“It’s ok, I’ve got you,” he told her in a much gentler tone as he lifted her misshaped form of partially shifted limbs up as if she was made of glass and rushed her into the bathroom as another wave of snaps and cracks started up.

She let out a blood curdling screams right by his ear. Tears streamed down her face but she didn’t remember crying. “I’m.. so.. sorry,” her words were barely audible above her sobs. She probably caused permanent damage to his hearing.

“It’s ok. You need to stop fighting the shift.” His voice was soothing as he started to lower her into the tub.

“Wha..” She started to ask what he meant but panicked when he started to let go of her. She tried to grab hold of him but the claws on her partially malformed paws shredded his shirt and sliced at the skin on his chest as she cried out, “please don’t leave me.”

“It’s ok. I would never leave you. I just need to set you down so I can get in with you. I don’t want to slip and fall with you in my arms. You could be seriously hurt,” he tried to explain as he started to climb in next to her.

She saw the blood running down the front of him and pulled away from him sobbing heavily. “But I’m a monster. Look what I did to you.”

“No, you’re a werewolf like your birth parents were.” His tone was so serious that for a moment she thought he was trying to prank her.

More pain shot through her body and she screamed. When the pain finally let up she spit out, “so you knew my parents then.” Her voice was laced with sarcasm. She didn’t mean to take her pain out on him when he was trying so hard to help her but what he said wasn’t possible. Werewolves didn’t exist. “Even if they existed, it isn’t a full moon.” She didn’t realize that she said that last part out loud.

“No, I didn’t know your parents. And the full moon thing is a myth,” he responded to her question. His voice remained calm and soothing

Another bout of pain hit her and a tail like appendages slapped the surface of the water and she felt her panic rising. “Then how can you know what I am. How could you know I am a werewolf?”

His voice was soft when he answered her, “because we are werewolves. Once we turn 18 and get our wolf we can sense those who are also werewolves.”

Her mind latched on to the fact he said ‘we’ and once the next wave of pain let up she called him on it. “We who? Did one of you turn me into this?” She was in full panic mode now. If they did this to her she needed to escape and get help.

Lugos sighed, “All those movies have caused so much damage to our kind over the years.” His voice was so sad it cut through her panic and she wanted nothing but to comfort him. “The only way to become a werewolf is if you were born one. That is how I know that at least one of your parents had to be a werewolf. Danny, Jacob, Kim, Nina, and I are all werewolves.”

Again the pain gripped her. She was so exhausted she just wanted it to end. Lugos could feel her fatigue setting in. “I hate to do this to you but if you don’t shift soon it will cause serious issues.”

She didn’t even have time to try and figure out what he was saying. “Sattira, shift.” His voice was so deep and commanding.

There was a heavy aura that radiated off him in waves so heavy she felt the weight of it push against her. She heard the voice in her head growling in defiance. A wave of intense pain hit her. Every bone in her body seemed to break and realign. She started to thrash sending water everywhere.

Just when the pain felt like it was too much it suddenly completely stopped. Lugos was holding her head above the water. She opened her eyes she didn’t realize she had closed.

All the colors seemed more intense. She could see differences in the shades of white on the ceiling that created the picture of the woman from the foundation that was holding the moon.

She could hear sounds from farther away. A small animal, somehow she knew it was a rabbit, was burrowing through the undergrowth at the edge of the woods by the side of the house. She could hear the sound of waves hitting the sand. She could hear the beating of Lugos’ heart.

And as she lifted her head to look at him she caught the most intoxicating scent. It was the same one she had caught a hint of last night as she was cuddling up to her pillow. It was the same scent she had smelled in her dream. It was her favorite scent, only now it was more intense. It was the fresh smell of the woods after a spring shower where damp earth combines with a fresh breeze with a hint of fresh wet green and leaves thrown in for good measure.

The presence in her mind suddenly went crazy chanting, “Mate, mate, mate..”