And If I Say Yes? Student/Teacher Relationship

11

Chapter 11

As I soaked myself in the bath that night I thought to myself. I definitely rocked that lecture. I asked good questions, the students were engaged, and I even got to assign a paper for them to do. Even though this was a test, I'm glad it happened because I am sure I passed it. Nicholas Donovan I will last more than a month. 

Monday 

It's been 4 days since I last seen the class. Nicholas' class is every Monday and Wednesday. I looked around the lecture hall to see if Nicholas was going to appear like he did before but I couldn't find him. I collected the papers from the students on their way out to ensure that every student did it, and they did. 

Afterwards I walked back to the office, said hello to Linda Nicholas' secretary and read over the papers for the rest of my working shift. I made some notes, fixed some grammatical errors, then graded the paper. I left a stack on Nicholas' desk then left a small sticky note. 

Hi, 

I asked the students to write a response to my question on your book, its already graded. Please reach out to me if you have any questions as I won't be in for work until Wednesday. 

-Sky 

Once I left the note on top of the stack of papers, I noticed another note on his desk. The note was from the model look a like. 

Hey Prof,

For my Thursday 1pm and 3pm class I discussed Dr. Jekyll and Mr Hyde, all went well. 

-Ms. Acker 

I thought back, should I have changed my signing off name to Ms. McLarin instead of Sky? 

Before I could contemplate any further, Linda opened the door. 

"Hi sweetie, it's getting late and I need to lock up before I leave."

"Oh of course, sorry let me just grab my bag." 

Well that answers my question 

The Next Day 

It was my day off so by 7pm I decided to let loose with my roommates. This was especially necessary after the day I had. The model look alike texted me earlier this afternoon how Nicholas gave her a call on how great she did on Thursday's lecture. She went on and on about how much he praised her, but meanwhile I have not received a call or text from him all day about my performance.  

My roommates and I were all in my room with drinks in our hand. I was on my second glass of Merlot, Tori just finished her fourth shot of Hennessy, while Ming was still on her first can of beer. If it wasn't already obvious, we were feeling lit. 

"You know, I love you girls. We may enjoy different ways of getting loose but we come together and always have a good time." Tori said.

I nodded my head in agreement. "Yes exactly, I love getting loose." I said a bit buzzed. On the drunk scale From 1-10 I was definitely a 4 going on 5. 

"Are you sure you are getting loose. All day it seemed like you had something on you're mind." Ming said. 

I frowned at her response she was right. 

"Yeah, you have been glued to you're phone all day, are you expecting a call, maybe from a guy?" Tori asked while raising her eyebrows in suspicion. Tori was definitely the most drunk. 

"No, I have no man in my life, not since college." I laughed back. 

"Then what is on you're mind" Ming asked now opening her second can of beer. 

"Nicholas Donovan is the problem." I said after taking a sip of the bitter Merlot. 

"What he do now, you got fired yet?" Tori asked with a chuckle. 

"No I still have my job, well I think I still do." I answered. 

"So what's wrong?" Tori asked. 

"Well it's just that I had one of the best lectures of my life so far and I know Nicholas was watching me directly but he hasn't called me at all. Instead he called the model look alike and told her she did a good job.  How does that even happen. The book selection is nothing but a story that you can read in the 9th grade!" I shouted. 

“So you want him to say Good job to you." Ming asked followed by a small burp. 

"No it's just... well I guess you are right. I want that approval especially since I covered the book he wrote." I said. 

"Wasted Love, you covered Wasted Love?" Tori asked. 

"Yes, so I'm confused as to why he hasn't calle-."

Before I could finish my sentence Tori cut me off. 

"Sky, you just dug you're own grave." 

"Wait, why?" I asked trying to make sense of this. 

"Wasted Love isn't just a book that Professor Donovan wrote. That book is the real story of his life, just with fictional names." Tori explained. 

My mouth opened with shock. "Is that true? How do you know." I asked. 

"Well it hasn't been confirmed by him, but his addict ex wife made it a point to tell everyone that the book was nothing but lies and that she deserved a portion of the money from the book sales. And guess what? he gave her 50% of the sales to keep her out of his life." Tori explained further. 

"Oh my Gosh. I need to talk to him." I said. 

"And say what, sorry I talked about a book about you're life to 100 students in your very own lecture hall?" Ming joked. 

"Yes, exactly that. Now both of you leave. I need to make this call." I said. 

"Haha good luck." Ming said. 

They both grabbed their drinks then left my room. I placed my wine glass on my night stand beside my bed then took a quick shower. Afterwards I put on my pj's which consisted of an over sized t shirt and boy short underwear. I went on my bed still a bit buzzed then called the number. 

Ring....Ring...Ring ... No answer 

Maybe it's good that he didn't answer the call. But at the same time, now would have been best. I have this liquor courage that would make it easier to talk to someone so intimidating. 

The ringing of my phone interrupted my thoughts. He called back. 

Come on Sky you can do this. 

After taking several deep breaths I picked up. 

There was silence on his end so I spoke up. 

"Hi Nicholas, it’s Skylar McLarin, I am you're TA for..-"

"I know who you are." He responded in that deep voice of his. But strangely I didn't feel intimidated by him. Must be the wine talking. 

"So I have come across some new information that I had no idea about before... When I created that lecture for Wednesday's class I just wanted to speak to the students about one of my favorite books and I knew they would love the book as well. I had no idea that Wasted Love was based off of you're life. I know your past track record when it comes to your TA's, and I know this is the perfect excuse to terminate me especially since I am on a trial basis here, but I truly had no idea, and I feel like it would be wrong to be fired. Despite everything, I taught the hell out of that class and opened their minds to new ideas and concepts. Firing me would be a disservice, not only to myself but to the students learning. They were so engaged and by reading their papers you could say they enjoyed your book as much as I did.”

I ended my rant and I instantly regretted it. Why didn't I keep my mouth shut. After what felt like an eternity of silence I spoke. 

"Okay I'll say goodbye for now."

As I was about to end the call his voice sounded, causing goosebumps to erupt on my skin. I clenched my comforter tightly around me as I listened. 

"You asked the class if the decision Liam made was worth it. Choosing love over his family, but I want to know your answer to that question." 

His voice was different. Instead of the sharp remarks he usually made, he sounded more vulnerable? Grateful? I just knew that what he wanted at that moment was a genuine answer, so I gave him one. 

"Yes" I answered. My voice was so soft spoken, barely there but somehow I knew he could hear me. His breathing was heard from the other line. Hearing it made me feel comfortable, the connection felt warm and intimate, it felt like a safe space. 

"Yes it was worth it. Just by reading the book I could feel that Liam never felt like he belonged in the family, even if he got all the praises from his father. Without knowing it, Beatrice was his way out from his corrupted family. His father said the Beatrice made Liam have no back bone, but I think otherwise. Liams want or should I say his need to start a brand new life was him making the most important decision of his life. That alone took more grit and courage then even marrying Beatrice. So I feel like even if Beatrice wasn't in the picture, Liam would have chosen his freedom over his family." I answered. 

Nicholas was silent for a moment but then I heard him chuckle. The first time I ever heard such a sound from him, and I loved that sound so much. 

"How many times have you read that book?" He asked.

"Too much to count." I answered  almost immediately. 

Again another silence. 

"You're different today, not as timid." He answered. 

"You're different today as well, not as scary and cold. Plus it's probably the wine that has directed this conversation between you and I" 

I answered honestly. 

I could hear Nicholas take a deep breath before speaking.  

"I suppose I am different now because of this beer that I'm having now." 

I couldn't help but laugh. Were we both a bit drunk? Nicholas laughed back as well before saying ..

"Goodnight  Skylar."

Then the phone call ended. 

I placed the phone on my nightstand then placed my covers comfortably over me. My body felt hot and all I could think about was the conversation that we just had. He was making me feel a way I never felt before, that I never knew was even possible. 

And wait, did he just call me Skylar!