Before love Broke Me

Chapter four

I went up to my apartment ready to take a little nap before heading to the office? Just a short one enough to reset my body and pretend I still had control over my day. I felt accomplished in a quiet, private way, the kind that makes you smile to yourself without needing an audience.

Who wouldn’t feel accomplished, please? I laughed softly at my own thoughts.

I dropped my bag on the bed the moment I walked in and followed it without hesitation, landing beside it like my bones had finally remembered they were tired. I didn’t even bother adjusting the sheets or checking if I’d hurt myself, I just lay there, staring at the ceiling, reminiscing on everything replay in slow motion.

The night before? The way his voice sounded when he said my name, the warmth of his lips on mine, the calm certainty that had followed me home.I was still smiling when my phone beeped.

Hope you got home safe, beautiful.

My heart jumped so fast it startled me.

I picked up my phone immediately, It was him.

I shifted on the bed, pulling my legs up slightly, adjusting myself into comfort like this moment deserved it. Without thinking, I slipped out of my clothes until I was left in just my underwear, the fabric cool against my skin, I wiggled my feet lightly, suddenly restless and wide awake.

I just got in, I replied.

Still trying to process everything.

His response came quickly.

Same here. I didn’t realize how late it was until you left.

I smiled.

Time moved strangely last night, I typed back.

That was how it started.

Simple messages at first, Gentle curiosity, then longer replies that made me pause before sending, not because I was unsure, but because I wanted to say things right. He asked about my writing, what kind of stories I liked to tell. I told him I loved words that felt lived in, the kind that didn’t rush to impress but stayed long enough to mean something, I also told him how much I loved horror, asides psychological, paranormal was another big thing for me, I loved it.

He told me music was the same for him.

If it doesn’t feel honest, I lose interest, he wrote. I like sounds that breathe.

That stayed with me for some reasons, at some point he sent:

You have a calming presence. I don’t know how else to explain it.

I stared at the message longer than necessary,No one had ever described me like that before,People usually tell me I’m too quiet, I replied.

Quiet isn’t empty, he texted back. Some people are just loud without saying anything. I felt seen in a way that didn’t demand anything from me.

We kept talking. About nothing and everything. About work. About the strange pressure of becoming who you thought you’d be by now. About dreams we’d shelved and hopes we still carried quietly. I forgot about the nap. Forgot about the clock. Forgot that I had less than three hours before I needed to be at work.

All I knew was that my phone felt warm in my hands and my chest felt full, When I finally glanced at the time, my heart dropped.

“Oh God,” I whispered.

I jumped out of bed, suddenly frantic, my earlier calm evaporating. I rushed through getting ready, took off my underwear very quickly, running to the bath room, immediately I was done, I slipped into a simple but elegant dress, the kind that made me feel composed even when I wasn’t, wore my black classy but simple heels , Light makeup, hair pulled together just enough to pass as intentional.

I grabbed my bag, then stopped, rushing back to pick up my files, the raw pieces I’d written for the company. Pages that held my thoughts, my effort, my late nights. I hugged them to my chest for a second like they could steady me.

I was already late.

As I stepped out, phone buzzing again in my hand, I smiled despite myself.

This wasn’t how I’d planned my day, but somewhere deep inside, I didn’t regret it, atleast not yet.

I had no idea that the day I thought I was late for, was already waiting to introduce me to him all over again.

*****

The ride to the office felt longer than usual, every red light irritated me, every slow pedestrian felt personal. I kept glancing at the dashboard clock like it might suddenly show mercy, like time would remember how hard I was trying. My foot tapped restlessly as I drove, my mind split into two places at once. One part of me was rehearsing apologies for my boss, already bracing for the disappointment in her eyes, the sharp words she never bothered to soften. The other part of me kept drifting back to my phone, to his messages, to the ease with which he had slipped into my morning and rearranged it. I hated how easily I’d let it happen, and yet, in all of this,I didn’t regret it.

At a red light, I picked up my phone again, reading through our messages like they were something fragile I needed to protect. I smiled without meaning to, then quickly wiped it away, forcing my face back into something neutral. I couldn’t afford to walk into work glowing like this. Not today.

My phone buzzed again.

Did you manage to get some rest?

I hesitated before replying, then typed back quickly.

Not really. I’m rushing to work now.

I hope your day goes well, he replied. Try not to overthink everything.

I laughed softly.

That might be impossible.

Then overthink a little less, he sent back. I’ll talk to you later.

That simple sentence did something to me.

I’ll talk to you later.

It sounded casual, but it also sounded like a promise.

I dropped my phone into my bag as I pulled into the office parking lot, inhaling deeply before stepping out of the car. The building loomed in front of me, tall and unforgiving, reminding me that real life didn’t pause just because my heart wanted to linger somewhere else.I straightened my dress, adjusted my bag on my shoulder, and held my files tighter.

This was work, this is my reality, and this version of myself I had worked hard to become. And yet, as I walked toward the entrance, my phone felt heavier than usual in my bag, like it was carrying something more than just messages. Like it held the beginning of something I hadn’t planned for, something that already knew how to reach me when my guard was down.

I didn’t know it yet, but the distance between my personal life and my professional one was already thinning and by the end of the day, it would disappear completely.