The Healer’s Mate

Coffee

Jane POV 

It’s official. I look like hell. I stared at myself in the mirror and took in the empty eyes that stared back at me. In the reflection I notice my slippers and wonder what it would be like to put them on and crawl back into my inviting bed. Instead, I slip my tennis shoes on and head out the door. The wind bites at me through my scrub top so I hurry to the pack house infirmary. 

The automatic coffee pot has already started to my relief and I grab a mug before settling into my desk. The fluorescent lights bounce off the floors as I make my way to the first room to shove blankets into their shelves. I made my way through my mental lists, doing my damndest to keep my mind from straying to the mate who occupies my waking and sleeping dreams. 

“Hello?” A low voice greeted me accompanied by a knock on the door. I peaked my head over the shelf to catch a glimpse of a large, sandy haired male standing at the front desk. 

“Hi. What can I do for you?” I asked, approaching his massive frame. He stood at least a head taller than me, and definitely twice as wide. Muscles outlined his red shirt and I had to drag my eyes away from his defined arms. 

“I’m having some trouble with headaches and I was wondering if you had any ibuprofen?” His eyes lit up as they met mine. 

“Uhm... yeah. Do I know you? I usually know everyone here,” I turned to grab my keys to the medicine room. 

“I’m Trey,” he said. “Here visiting for the mission at Red Aspen.” His voice was easy, a stark contrast to Ben’s cold demeanor. 

“Oh,” I kept my back to him so he wouldn’t catch on to my hesitation. Instead, I moved to unlock the small closet where I diligently kept my stock of pharmaceuticals. Grabbing a pack of pain relievers, I turned to hand them to him without another word. 

“Hey, do you want to maybe get some coffee with me this afternoon?” His face was hopeful as he searched mine for a response. 

“Do you usually ask girls out before asking their name?” I mused over my shoulder.

“Oh! Right. Sorry. You wouldn’t happen to be willing to forget I asked that.. and instead tell me your name?” He stumbled as I let out a small laugh. When was the last time I laughed? 

“It’s Jane,” I decided to let him off the hook and catching a glimpse of his stark blue eyes. 

“Jane. Very proper. I like it.” He grinned.

“Well, I’m glad you approve,” I raised an eyebrow at him meeting his toying gaze.

“Coffee this afternoon, Jane?” 

“How about 2?” I suggested. 

“Can’t wait!” He popped the pills into his mouth and jogged out the door. 

Ben POV

Still mulling over Gabe’s advice from the night before, I decided to grab a cup of coffee from the shop before heading to get another meeting with Ethan. The guy was ruthless in his planning, and while I enjoyed it- I couldn’t help but feel more than ready to rip off some heads. The feeling only got worse as I caught sight of Trey and my mate- my mate, laughing at an outside table. Her eyes lit up as he said something that made her uncontrollably giggle and he responded by tucking a piece of her dark hair behind her ear. The familiar roaring in my ears started to build but something stopped me. 

“You can’t tell me where I can and can’t be”, she had said that night and she was right. I needed to play this one a lot cooler of it was going to be anything productive. 

“Trey, Jane” I said lowly nodding at my pack member. I couldn’t fight the smug feeling that came as realization washed over Trey. I decided to give him a minute- just one- to figure out what to do next. “What do you suggest here?” I asked her. 

“Do you prefer coffee or tea?” She met my gaze with a cold stare.

“Coffee, today I think.” I matched hers.

“Americano is the best here. Cold. Dark. Seems like your type of drink,” she retorted. “I’ll save you the struggle here,” she turned her gaze to Trey while standing up and grabbing her bag. “Thanks for the coffee.” I shot Trey a look that said “this isn’t over” and followed Jane around the white picket fence as she headed back down the street. 

“Stop following me,” she ordered through gritted teeth.

“I’ll stop when you turn around and tell me what the f**k that was,” I growled in response but I wasn’t ready for her to turn on me.

“What that was, was me having a life for the first time since you ended this! That was me finding a way to breathe through the gaping hole in my chest. I can barely function, Ben! I am doing my f*****g best here, but you absolutely have to give me some room, or just off me here because I can’t do this anymore!” The smell of salt filled my nostrils as tears began to pour down her pale face. She didn’t make a move through them, she just continued to stare at me. 

“Jane, I...” I reached my hand up to wipe one of her tears away. For all of them that fell because of me, I needed to atone for at least one. No sooner than the warmth of her met my skin, did she jerk back away clutching her face. I stepped forward to catch her as she went off balance but she recoiled faster than I could get to her. 

“It hurts,” she whispered, removing her hand to reveal a large red mark across her face in the shape of my hand. My stomach rolled. “It hurts to touch you,” she said more clearly taking another step back and another, until she was leaving me standing with my mouth open. 

. . . 

Taking a deep breath, I entered the conference room hopefully for the last time. Cursing to myself as soon as I scented her, I took the seat farthest from Jane. She didn’t cast her eyes up from her notepad as her pen drew lazy tracings around the page. The red hand print faded from her face but she held the same distance in her eyes as earlier. 

“This will be the final meeting before we make our move on Red Aspen. Ben will present the plan of attack according the the blueprint of the packhouse.” Ethan nodded in my direction. I began explaining the route we would be taking to the opposing pack’s land. Each of the five commands that Ethan and I had decided on took note of their rank’s responsibilities. 

“Finally, Ethan, you will be responsible for the alpha, as my father has already rescinded his right for that kill,” I stole a glance at the female across the room. Her face was expressionless and she still hadn’t looked up from her doodling. I was unsure if she even knew where she was.

“Jacob, you will lead your group to the dungeons of the pack house. With any luck, we’ll recover a few prisoners who still have their senses,” Ethan’s Beta nodded his understanding. “Jane, you’ll set up camp here to tend to any wounded,” Ethan pointed to a position on the map but Jane didn’t glance up from her drawing. Her brother’s face flashed a look of concern before clearing his throat loudly. Breaking from her trance she looked up to meet his gaze. 

“Hmm? Oh yeah, so just make sure when you’re in need to medical assistance or you see someone who is that you mind link myself or Maria immediately. That way we can assess and get help to people right away.” She scanned faces before resting on mine. Instead of keeping eye contact, her lashes dropped and she went back to her pen and paper, her face still wan and blank. 

Ethan shot me a look from my left and I averted my eyes away from her. I couldn’t concentrate on anything else the rest of the meeting. My heart raced as I looked at the spot on the map where Jane and Maria would be setting up. It wasn’t close to the pack house by any means, but it wouldn’t be out of harms way either. I knew I had to find a way to keep her out of the cross fire, but I wasn’t sure how.

Jane POV

The meeting room emptied before me but Ethan’s lingering glare told me to stay out. I stared at the wall opposite me, as if I could fool him into thinking I was considering redecorating. He let out a sigh and braced his arms on the back of his chair. We do this every so often. In meetings I’m the pack healer and behind closed doors I’m his sister. 

“Are you going to be able to handle this?” Ethan said not meeting my gaze. 

“Absolutely.” 

“Really?  Because you can’t even make it through a meeting with a clear mind. I can’t send you out without knowing that you will keep your wits about you,” he said stiffly. 

“Ethan, I’m fine. Really I just have a lot in my mind but you know how all this goes. As soon as it’s time, I’ll be ready.” I assured him reaching over to put my hand on his arm. 

“Okay. I just don’t want any surprises tomorrow,” he said. 

“You won’t have any from me,” I said standing from my chair. “I’m going to make sure everything is ready.” 

I all but ran from the conference room knowing that Ethan would be able to sense my uneasiness about tomorrow. I looked down at the list on my phone making sure everything was set when I caught a figure out of the corner of my eye. Ben’s dark hair hung over his eyes, longer than it had been the first time we met. His eyes were fixed on the floor but I knew that if I could see, dark shadows would be under them. His arms were crossed over one another as he rested against the wall of the corridor. 

“He will kill you.” 

“What?” 

“He won’t think twice about it. If he knows what you are to me, he will kill you and he will make me watch,” his voice caught in his throat at the last part. 

“There’s no way he would get away with it. My brother...” 

“He wouldn’t care, Jane” he cut me off. “He wouldn’t care and I know because I’ve seen him do it. I can’t let him do that to you.” 

I took a few steps towards him, waiting for him to cut and run. He didn’t. He stood with unearthly stillness and I raised a hand to his shoulder but stopped short remembering our earlier encounter. Horror struck me as I knew what he was saying. Tomorrow we’d be in the same place as his father. He’d know if we were mates so we had to make it clear we weren’t. I dropped my hand from its place midair and snuck a glance at his face. He was riddled with despair and I  started to realize that it wasn’t just me who was broken. We both were, and there was no fixing it. I had no idea what I was going to do, but I knew that as soon as this was over I wouldn’t be the same again.