ON HOLD CHERRY {Chérre}

A Simple Crush

*A/N*

CHER.

The smoke left my mouth and I cough heavily as my eyes watered through the dry air.

"Jeez..." I breath looking at the cigar in my fingers slowly burn. The smoke tastes like dirty leaves and burnt coffee on my lips. Even then, the smell reminds me of him. The front door then creaks along with the sound of footsteps. I quickly hide the cigar behind my back watching as the door slowly opens. Soon Vincent enters and I hold in the cough creeping from my chest. "Cher. Do you remember what I told you about going into my office when I'm not he—" He freezes.

"What's that smell?" His face becomes troubled as he sniffed the air. "Y-you forgot to lock up yesterday." I say wittingly with a smug grin on my face. "

And how does that imply that I'm giving you the right to go throughout my things?" He quickly walks up to me and I tensed as the smell grew stronger. He towered over my as his brown eyes stared down at me.

"You went into my drawer didn't you?" I could see his jaw tighten with frustration. I nervously stand there in silence as the cigar continued to burn.

"Cher. Did you go through my drawer?" His voice became soft but darkened demanding for an answer. "I.." I suddenly couldn't speak at his strong presence and looked down at my feet. Soon the cigar burned out and singed my fingers causing me to wince in pain.

"Ow." I turn and look at my slightly injured hand. Vincent grabs it and and grunts as his sees what I had done. "Why would you do something like this? Was it worth it?" his cheeks were now slightly red with embarrassment as he moves me behind his desk. He takes the cigar away ashing it then dumping it in the bin.

"Next time you go into my personal things without permission we're gonna have problems." He rubs the inside of his eyes handing me a wipe for my hand. I take the wipe and walk over to my bag and sit down.

"It's a Saturday anyway. Why are you here?" He questions taking out the work plan for next week.

"Well, I actually came to give you something. I forgot yesterday." I exclaim reaching into my bag. Pulling out a white envelope, I hand it to him excitingly. "Its an invitation. For tonight." I add. He takes its confusingly slowing opening it. "An invitation?" He examines the embroidered white paper.

"My dad is having a dinner party. It's just going to be a bunch of old sick people from his group meetings, so I convinced him to let me invite you. If you'd..want to come." I was a little hesitant to ask honestly. He folds the card back up and tosses it on his desk, "I don't think I'll be able t—" I cut him off rushing to grab the paper.

"Come on. You're the only person who doesn't lecture me about life and death and give me peppermints every time I see you." I protest , biting my lip in angst, and he was taken aback by me wanting him there of all people. He sighs putting his hands on his hips, "Cher just because I'm not some old man walking with dementia doesn't mean we have things in common. Even if you’re 19, young girls like you don't hang out with men my age. Plus, I have things I have to do." His words hit me harder than I expected. I slightly cower my confidence and gather my things as I wasn't interested in trying to convince him to come anymore.

"Fine. I'll see you Monday." I stand up throwing my bag over my shoulder. I head to the door not bothering to look back at him. Before I could get my hand on the knob Vincent comes up and opens it himself.

"L-let me take you home at least," he offers reaching into his pocket pulling out his keys. "Don't you have 'things' to do?" I snarled at him. "I have time to take you home.." He grabs my shoulder and we head out the door.

—

We cruised down the street at regular speed with the radio on low volume. I sat back with my elbow casually sitting on the window seal. The inside of Vincents car was clean and kept with nice suede interiors. It felt welcoming when ever I rode in his car and it even smelled just like his cologne and cigars. I look over to him and his hand rested on his brow as he sat relaxingly; other hand steering. I try not to stare too much as I was still upset he didn't accept my invitation. Even then, I'm such a puppy for not taking a cab home instead.

"For someone who can't stand to be around sick people you sure risk your health by smoking one of my cigars," He joked but still maintained a serious tone. A grin comes across his face as I could tell he didn't take my actions to heart. A thought then crossed my mind and I turn to him quickly.

"Oh gosh you're not gonna tell my dad are you?" I incline. He then chuckled as we pulled up to a red light. He took his hand off the wheel as I stared at him fearfully.

"Don't worry I'm not gonna tell your old man. But I'll tell you this." He leans into me and our faces meet. His dark eyes stared into mine while he kept his same grin. I retreat back to my seat unable to keep contact. He still continues to look at me, "I won't tell your father that you broke into my office, and smoked my cigar. If you promise to save me a seat at the party." He says sternly, but I soon catch onto his words. Before I knew it turn and quickly hugged him in excitement.

"Really?!" I squeal unable to contain my joy, "Hey! I'm only going so you don’t die out of boredom Cher." He adds pushing me away. The light turns green and we head down the road. Embarrassed, I lean back in my seat placing my hands in my lap.

"Sorry, I just didn't expect you to take the invitation," I say at a low tone.

"Well, I wasn't, but then I thought about having to grade your essay tonight and knew I could use a few drinks." He gestures to me, and I hit his arm in retaliation.

"But I will add this Cher. I'm still you're teacher so you should still maintain some type of formality even if I am in your home." He says seriously.

"Yeah yeah." I cross my arms accepting his request.

—

We pull into my driveway, and I gather my bag opening my door. "Make sure to dress nice. Wear something black." I smile at him sliding off the seat.

"Bye Cher." He waves his hand as I jog to the fence of my lawn. "Byeeee!" I waved back and ran to the steps of the front door. I could hear his car speed off, and I looked back to see it cruising down the street. Before I could turn back and open the door, a hand grabbed my wrist pulling me inside.

"Where have you been?!" Carol, my father's nurse and our caregiver, shouted at me. "Calm down I was just dropping off the invitation for Vincent. He took me home too." I explain to her walking away.

"The party starts in a few hours and the house isn't prepared. Now you promised your father you'd help decorate." She scolds further following me. I remove my bag sitting it on the counter in the kitchen as I opened the fridge.

"And I will" I say back to her annoyed. I grab an apple and water then go over the the dining room table. Carol grabs a stack of pans setting them on top of the oven.

"He said yes by the way." I smile to myself. "You're always trying to see that man every chance you get. At least your grades are getting better." She whispers, but I was still able to hear her.

"It's only a dinner." I press her, "Mhm and it better stay that way. Now come help me with these vegetables." She scolds.

—

LATER THAT DAY

"Easy Miss Fletcher." I cautiously help one of the party goers to the couch. "Thank you dear" She pinches my cheek as she flops down. Standing up straight, I fix my strapless baby blue dress, putting my hair behind my ears.

"That's quite the dress dear. Makes you look so much more like a woman. You must be waiting for someone." She adds giving me a smile. I smile back and look around as the elderly and nurses mingled with each other. I glance at the clock, 10:47. Still no sign of him. I sigh and walk into the kitchen grabbing a tray of hors d'oeuvres. I take them back to the living room and tend to the guests with the tray. Everyone speaks with each other, talking about their past vacations, and heath conditions. I made light conversation with some of them as I waited impatiently.

—

After handing out all of the finger food, I sat on the kitchen counter top sulking. Soon my dad comes in, waddling over to me with his gold cane in hand.

"Enjoying the party? I see Vincent didn’t show up." His frail voice said as he approached me.

"Just a little bummed is all." I say non cheerfully.

"That's okay sweetie. You can still enjoy yourself. I’ll let you finish off the wine bottles if it makes you feel better." He rubs the side of my arm. I give him an assuring grin and he turns away waddling back to the party. I sigh before doing as he said and taking a wine bottle that was 1/4 full. I drank straight from the neck wiping my chin as I spilled some.

—

EVEN LATER.

"Thank you for coming, Jim..Pam..Michael.." Carol sees the guests out. I sit on the steps watching as the house slowly empties confirming the party was in fact over. She soon closes the door behind the last guest. She turns and looks at me with pity. My eyes began to welp with soon to be tears as I get up, and run to my room. I enter, closing the door behind me, and remove my dress in frustration. I fight my emotions and remove my heels. 'I’m so f*****g stupid.' I fall back into my bed staring at the ceiling while the steamy tears ran down the sides of my face.

—

VINCENT.

I pull up to Cher's house as quick as I can and get out. I finish buttoning my shirt as I blindly fixed my hair. I can see guests being helped into their cars as it was clear the party had ended. Either way, I rush up the door knocking quickly. I wait impatiently trying to look through the door window. Soon the door opens and it's Cher's father.

"Vincent," He says cheerfully, "You just missed the party. Maybe next time." He says waving me off. "Yes I'm aware sir. I promised Cher I'd come." I explain pleading with him.

"Ah well. How about you come in. I’m sure she still be delighted." He welcomes me. I walk in and look around to see Carol cleaning up, and no sign of Cher.

"Would you go tell Cher that Vincent came by to see her. Can’t stand to have her go to bed sad." He orders her. She gives me a look of disdain and heads up the stairs.

"Sorry I just got caught up with papers and—" I trail off upset with myself. "No worries." He assures me and sits down in a chair. I then lightly hear carol talking with Cher only for that to be followed by the slamming of, what I assume is, her bedroom door. Carol comes back with her hands on her hips.

"She said you're dead to her, and she wants a new teacher." She tries to hold back a laugh. I grunt rubbing my brow.

"Ahh don't mind her. She'll be over it by Monday I'm sure of it." He laughs it off, "And I was just back on her good side." I say to myself.

After speaking more with her dad briefly Carol tends to him helping him to the stairs. "Uh would you mind seeing yourself out? Gotta get ready for bed." Her dad kicks me out as he's helped up the stairs. I nod in response, and head to the front door. I open it, and step onto the porch. Then something in my gut stops me. ‘I can't leave without apologizing directly. ’ I think. I look back and hear a door close upstairs, followed with silence. Without hesitation I step back inside closing the door. I remove my shoes, and quietly walk to the stairs trying to avoid any creaks. No sign of movement. I tip toe further entering a hallway. I see three doors and walk up to the furthest one based on how far her room door sounded. The smell of lavender and Cher's perfume hug my nose. It had to be her room. Without thinking I knock.

"GO AWAY CAROL!" Cher yells, and I jump looking around hoping no one heard.

"Psst Cher." I whisper into the crease of the door and frame. A few moments of rustling went by and the door swings open. Standing there was Cher, in a big t shirt, hair a mess, and eyes puffy. Her lips were slightly parted and cracked as she examined me intensely.

"Vincent?"

—

CHER.

"Vincent?" I look at him in disbelief. He was standing there with slight fright in his face as he knew he shouldn't have come up here.

"I just wanted to say I meant to come on time I just got caught up in work..personal stuff. I'm sorry." He quietly explains. I cross my arms not believing him.

"You probably didn't want to come at all, and just don’t wanna seem like an asshole for it." I fire back at him hurt.

"I'm here now." He adds, "What's that supposed to mean? The party’s over." I rebut. Then, I noticed he wore an all black outfit just like I told him. It gave me slight reassurance knowing he listened. Before I could decide on what to say I hear my dads door open.

"Cher?" I hear his frail voice come from there. I quickly pull Vincent in without warning as my dads head pops out.

"Were you just talking honey?" He asks, "Oh no, I was on the phone. Bad signal." I spit out at him.

"Oh" he responds, and gives a look of confusion, but still closes the door. I sigh with relief, but my heart drops, and I turn around closing my door behind me. "Shit." I say in a panic at the fact that my teacher is now in my f*****g bedroom at 12 at night. Vincent stands there seeming to be unable to speak. I felt uncomfortable as he looks around at the items, and furniture peppered across my room as if it were a museum.

"Hellooo." I say walking up to him. He looks down at me and his cheeks were flushed.

"You have to go" I say grabbing his arm and going over to my door. I open it again to kick him out. All of a sudden, I see Carol leaving my dads room. I quickly retreated into Vincent slamming my door back.

"Fuck." I hiss as we stumble back. He pulls away from me. "You can't go through the front door." I complain. Then suddenly a knock comes to my door.

"Cher?" It was Carol. "Are you decent?" She asks. I continue cursing under my breath again grabbing Vincent bringing him up to the window. I hear the doorknob begin to turn as Carol tries to enter. With quick thinking, I pull him down into my closet dumping piles of clothes on top of him.

"Hold on I'm changing!" I shout, and she stops from fully opening the door. I put a shirt over his head, and close the closet tightly. I gather myself, and walk over to the door. I open it and she stares at me suspiciously.

"Can I help you?" I say leaning against the frame. "You just slammed your door. Everything alright?" She says with concern looking around my room.

"Oh, my bad" I painfully put on an act, "I fell and hit the door is all. You know clumsy ole me." I explain quickly. She looks at me with even more suspicion. "Well while I'm still here. I'll run you a bath. Least I can do with all your help tonight." She grabs my arm, but I resist her pulling. "No worries! I'll run my own. Don't wanna put you through more trouble than you need" I pull back with my other hand on my door frame. "Nonsense dear. You were all over the place today." She insists. I look back and see Vincent staring wide eyed through my closet blinds. And before I knew it, Carol was walking me to the bathroom.

—

VINCENT.

To this day, I have no idea why I didn't jump out her window, and run to my car that very moment. Why I didn't get in my car, drive far away from her, and quit the next day. Why I stood there waiting for whatever came next. Why I sat there; waiting for her.

‘That, might have been my first sin.’

CHER.

My damp feet padded down the hallway as I held my towel tightly around me. The breeze led me to pick up pace towards my room. As I got near, I reached for the doorknob; only to have my heart stop. Vincent immediately leaped into my mind. Did he go out my window? Was he still in my room? With thoughts running through my mind, I slowly open the door. As I crack it, I felt the warmth of my room cause chills on my arms, legs, and chest. I kept my gaze at the wall too scared to look at my closet. I got to the point of closing my door behind me, and my heart sank even further. To my surprise, I see Vincent sitting in the closet; covering his eyes. I don’t know why, but I can’t help but let out a sigh of relief. I still was still anxious. 'I'm naked with my teacher in my room' Thoughts began entering my mind. 'Why didn't he leave?' But my body wouldn't allow me to let out said question.

"Don't worry I won't look." He says softly coming out the closet with slight fear, turning his back to me. I stand there for a brief second before dropping my towel. Warmth wraps around my skin, along with his presence. Having him in my room felt intimate, yet made me uncomfortable. I quickly walk past him to my closet. My heart races even faster when I came closer to him. Without realizing it, my shoulder grazed his arm while I reached for the knob. He shifted further to the wall in response; clearing his throat. I rummage through my clothes quickly grabbing what I need. Hastily, I put on shorts and a tank top along with a pair of socks. I look over to Vincent; still covering his eyes.

"A-are you decent?" He asks slightly turning his head. I reach out grabbing his arm turning him around. Opening his eyes, he stares down at me hesitantly. He’s silent as he seems to examine me. His cheeks became flushed with red almost instantly.

"You're crazy for staying in here. Your odds would have been better jumping out the window." I lightly joke, but stay serious. "Can't say I've been smart." He agrees.

"Well, You've sealed your fate. Consider yourself a dead man." I walked over to my bed, and crawled onto the duvet.

"What do you mean?" He followed over to me. I laid down on my back and stared at the ceiling.

"My tutor/teacher is in my bedroom past midnight." I explain , "My father will murder you and strangle me." I added. He chuckles putting his hands in his pockets. The moonlight begin to shine through the window, and I could see a cast over his face; the rest of his body a silhouette. I caught myself in deep thought.

"Why didn't you leave? Why did you coke to my room?" I ask with intrigued curiosity. His face becomes troubled. Then suddenly he came over sitting on the edge beside.

"If I'm honest with you Cher," his voice was delicate as if he was thinking of his words thoroughly, "I haven't the slightest idea." His words fill with sincerity. I retreat on my emotions taking in his words.

"If I didn't know any better I'd say you were planning this all along. The perfect scenario." I snark at him.

"Cher I assure you my intentions were extremely formal." He fires standing up. "Says the grown man in a 19 year old girls room while her father’s across the hall." I rebut. He put his hands on his hips turning away from me.

"What do you think my dad would say if he sa—" He quickly turns back with fear in his eyes causing me to stop my scolding. I get out of bed and walk over to him.

"Cher I don't know what you want me to say." Distress overcame him.

"Vincent," My emotions drove me to confront him further not caring if he'd freak out. "What is this? Really? You like me or somethin’?" I impulsively spurted out to him. I instantly regret the words wishing I could suck them back in. I couldn’t stop.

"I understand you wanted to apologize, but you could have during class. Why did you come up—" Before I can attempt to diffuse my question, "Y-yes actually, I happen to think.....you're very beautiful." He passionately responds.

VINCENT.

As she stands there my heart races like a rabbit in an endless cage trying to break free. Her words causes it to then burst into a million butterflies. "Y-yes actually, I happen to think..... you're very beautiful." I pour out to her.

I present to you, my second sin.

She stares at me as if I were a complete stranger. My cheeks puff like red roses and I wanted to hang myself then and there. The girl I saw as a hindrance to my job, and a childish interaction, became something I instantly would give the world for. All because of those those eyes and her words. I knew I'd never be able to take those feelings back.

CHER.

"You're out of your mind Vincent." I feel conflicted as the young girl in me was revered by his compliment. The other part of me didn’t want to ride this train.

'Isn't this what I wanted him to say?'

I fiddle with his cuff instinctively. "How long?" I bite my bottom lip not wanting to know more of his feelings, but helpless desiring them.

"Since right now. Since I noticed how amazingly your wet hair drapes over your cheeks. Since I noticed how you bite your lip while in deep thought. Like right now." He trailed off staring down at me; his eyes heavy. I slightly turn from him breaking eye contact.

"So you were planning on this." I lightly lean against my desk.

"Not, entirely." He responds, I then felt the warm of his hand begin to stroke mine causing more chills to my body.

"Cher, I-I don't know why I suddenly feel this way." His attempts to assure me only further made me uncomfortable. "I don't know either." I blatantly respond under my breath watching his hand caress mine.

"I think you should go." I stared back up at him with uncertainty. He let out a sigh that was filled with frustration.

"I really think I did I just signed my death wish." His voice cracks while he steps away from me.

"You know I think I'm just tired. It's late. I'm saying nonsense." He immediately dismisses our conversation.

"You must have hit your head on the way up here; you’re sure doing a lot of ‘thinking’." My emotions were even more twisted now.

‘I honestly wish that was the last thing I said to him.’

—

Ever since he started teaching me, I always felt this knot in my throat, and that wanted him to be the man of my fairytale. That desire lingered under my disdain for him, and I was now able to obtain it. But why was I so reluctant? He felt the 'same way'; didn't he?

As he stood there I thought of all the times I've wanted to tell him of my dreams. How I pictured moments like this hundreds of times. How I wanted his feelings to be just the same as mine. How he was the man I longed for. The man who would be my escape in a world of sickness and depression.

‘I wish I would have just made him leave.’

He began to approach me as if to say goodbye. I step forward lifting my heels off the ground. My body slightly fell into him and he caught me placing his hands in my waist.

"Cher..." I’m on the tip of my toes; my neck leaps out. And in that moment our lips slowly meet one another. His hands soon go from catching me to passionately wrapping around me. His cologne and sweat enchants me to want more. For that moment I feel as if the everything was right, and nothing’s wrong. For that moment I'd fully achieved the start of my fantasy. For that moment, I was happy.

After eternities our lips separate. My eyes flutter open to his still closed.

"I'll see you Monday." I touch our foreheads, and his arms still support my weight. He stammers over his words trying to concoct a sentence.

"My— I have a nice pool—my home—a pool you'd like." I assume he’s attempting to sway me to leave with him.

"You're talking even more crazy now." I attempt to joke unwrapping my arms from around his neck. "I—" The desperation oozes from him as he holds me closer. He tries to lean in for another kiss. Almost immediately, I manage to release myself from his grip; his hands still not wanting to let go.

"Cher I—" He steps towards me as if I was going to runaway from him, "I guess I wanted to take the opportunity while I could." I explain turning to my bed not wanting to look at him.

"I should go, before we do something regretful." He tries controlling himself. I bring myself into bed without even acknowledging him. In that moment, I wanted him to just disappear along with everyone else in the world and be alone.

‘Why did I do that?’

VINCENT.

As I entered my car, I kept replaying the events over and over in my head. My heart was full, and I was ready to burst with screams to the moon. I plop down onto my seat closing my door behind me. My body is trembling with passion, fear, and lust. My lips tingle still feeling the softness of hers. In that moment I was both ecstatic yet scared for my life. I didn't care. Because she had not only solidified my new found feelings, I knew they'd never leave.

I knew I’d never want to leave her.

~~~~~~~~~~