The Cursed Girl

Chapter 24

Gwen

I was feeling so much devastated inside and even if I collect every word of it then also I can't tell what I was feeling. All I can feel is loneliness inside me and my hunger which I was feeling is now no more instead I am feeling full. This sadness is enough to fill me up and make me more devastated. My mind is agreeing that they had left me but my heart is totally saying something else and that is maybe there is a reason for them to behave like this but what is it. Did I do something which had offended them that they are not ready to talk to me? But whose words are hurting me most is Tsetan? I am a curse to him. Where should I go and tell what I am feeling there. I have no sound inside my throat. 

"Where are you going Gwen?" I heard a familiar voice and looked behind and found Aria in her pink car. I wanted that car right now. I know a place where I could go and pour out my feeling. I looked at Aria who was waiting for my answer.

"Can you lend me car?"

 "I can but if you want to go somewhere than let me drop you off."

"There is no need of that. I can go. I will surely return it you and please don't ask me further." I said and she confusedly nodded and handed me the car keys and I took it and I slide in the car and drove away at a maximum speed. My mind was keep on distracting but I hold on myself and focus on the road. Many times I had felt as if I had lost the balance but the next moment I find myself being on my right mind and handle the situation and at the end I reached the place and looked at my surrounding. I switched off the engine and come out of there. I was surrounded by the trees only and in front of me there was a cliff and this place I get accidentally when I was very sad because my father passed away. Never thought  that this place will call me once again regardless that my pain all are pour out here only. 

Now from the word pain I am remembering why I have arrived over here and without me knowing a loud noise come out and that was long and I also kneel down and was clutching over my hair and tears burst out. The noise come down but was followed by another loud voice.

"Why this has to be with me only? Why? Why I am the one who get hurts at the end? Tsetan was right that I shouldn't trust on anyone but see me I trust everyone. Why do I have number of peoples which can be counted on fingers as well. This is very terrific for me to know that I have number of peoples and if they also decreases than I will remain lonely on this world and what I am scared about most is lonely. Wasn't it enough when my mother died while giving birth to me and than you also took my dad but I never complained about this but go with the flow and let myself endure in more pain but for how long? How long do I have to endure everything? You have also took away my best friend then also I didn't complain but now everything is so much that I am feeling that I should end my life." I said and sobbed really hard and soon I felt to close my eyes and before I could know anything I closed my eyes and let everything go as I also want to see what now is holding for me.

******

I opened my eyes and first thing which I saw was the dark sky which was lit up by the stars and I realized that it was already night. I sat up and looked in front and found the city was already lighten up. I look for my phone and but I didn't find it and I also don't want it because I am already lonely and now who will call me. But what must be the time and I don't know how long I was over here. I looked at the pink car. Whose car is this? Then everything came running inside my mind and I guess I have already took the car for so long and my stomach growled and I sighed. I neither had the breakfast nor lunch. I stood up and sat inside the car slowly and I hold on the steering wheel and took some breath before I start the engine and drove but not on the high speed which I had used to come over here. It was slow and steady and I reached Tina's house and knocked on the door and Aria opened the door and she was shocked to meet me. I took her hand and put the keys on her palm.

"I am sorry that I took your car for so long." I was about to go when she spoke.

"No problem. But where were you? Everyone was so much worried." A crooked smile come over and I looked at her.

"Who do you think must be waiting for me? And don't worry, I am already here so there is no need of the question where I was." I said. "Good bye and good night." I said and left the place and now it was my time to go home but I don't want to go home but somewhere else and it is not like that if I won't eat for one day than I will die. I will find a source tomorrow how I will fill my stomach if I skip the food. My steps were so much small and slow and I was taking pauses while going to home. After few minutes I was standing in front of my home but I didn't have the heart to go inside and I turn around and was about to go in other direction and want myself to lost somewhere but I heard the door being open.

"Where are you going now?" I heard aunt's voice and I didn't really turn around and neither walk away. "Don't you have voice to speak up?" He voice was cold and this was kind of first time when I heard her like this. "Look at me." I turned around and look at her she wasn't having any expression. "You are very late. Do you even know what is the time of your arrival?"

"No, my phone went missing and........" I wanted to speak more but I stopped myself because this is not my manners.

"And what?"

"Nothing." I said and looked away.

"Don't show me this attitude." 

"I am sorry." I said and turned around.

"You aren't going anywhere now. Get inside the house." She said and without looking at her I went inside the house and I could feel few eyes on me but I ignore them and dashed to my room and closed the door behind me and I saw the time that it was already 11 pm. I don't care now what will happen now. I changed my clothes and took a shower and come out and wore my clothes and sat on the bed and laid down and wanted to sleep but sleep was far from me. I heard a knock on the door.

"What do you want?"

"Have your dinner?" Aunt said.

"There is no time for me to have my dinner, time has already passed and eating at wrong time is not good and I already have the dinner somewhere. So please go out." I shouted. I can't really believe that I had talked like that with her. I heard footsteps fading away. I quickly opened the drawer and took the sleeping pills and after wards I slept.