MidKnights Lover

Chanwoo

The next morning, Julie and I made a schedule of what we wanted to do for the day. We decided to spend the day in town. There were several stores we both wanted to visit. We both had different ideas of which ones would be fun to see, so we decided we could split up and meet at a rendezvous point for lunch and dinner. Julie mainly wanted to shop for clothes, where I preferred the music and books stores. We both got ready and made our way into town.

“By the way, did you ever call the guy from yesterday?”

I had been dreading the inevitable question all day. I knew Julie wouldn’t let it go.

I shook my head, “No. I don't know anything about him. I don’t even know his name and he doesn’t know mine. I just can't bring myself to call.”

Julie let out an exasperated sigh. “You always complain about not going on dates. Then out of the blue there’s a guy interested in you and you don’t even bother calling him. What am I going to do with you?” Julie continued alternating between shaking her finger and her head at me as she scolded me.

She was right of course. In this instance it was my own fault for not calling the guy. He’d seemed harmless enough, so what was the big deal? I knew the underlying reason was I'm scared. Scared of possible rejection. Scared that maybe I would like him, but once he saw the real side of me and not the imagery he’d set in his mind, he might blow me off.  But, if I don’t try to overcome this fear then I will never be able to find someone who does care about me.

“Alright,” I said with a forced smile, “you’ve convinced me. I’ll give him a call by the end of today.”

“Really?” Julie’s eyes were round, then scrutinizing, “Promise me.”

Reaching out her hand, she held her pinky up. I chuckled and interlaced my pinky with hers. We then sealed the promise with our thumbs.

“Ok. You can’t break your promise now. Ooooh! Look at all those clothes! I’m going in here. Meet you at 1 for lunch.” And with that, she disappeared into a throng of people, leaving me shaking my head in wonder at how quickly I was abandoned for clothes.

I wandered around for an hour, popping my head into random clothes stores before finally seeing the one store I’d been wanting to visit. It was a bookstore that held the largest collection of Korean literature in LA. I quickly rushed in, gratefully exchanging the mob of people bustling outside for the blissful silence found only in bookstores and libraries. I breathed in the scent of paper and ink, relishing in the sensation it released in me. I felt a smile lit my face as I wound through the cascade of selections.

At last, I found the section I’d been searching for. I began screening each of the titles before reaching up to look through the book, then placing it back on the shelf. Since I was still learning Korean, I figured the best starting point would be with comic books. I continued the process of looking through the various books, when I saw one that caught my eye. I swiftly made my way to the shelf, positioning my left side as close to the shelving for an added reach.

Drats. Why does it have to be so far up? I’m not a short girl, but this one is definitely making me work for it.

Just as I was about to wrap a finger around the binding, another hand came up behind me, covering my hand and the binding. The fingers were long and the hand nearly enveloped my own entirely. It was obviously a guy’s. Feeling slightly embarrassed by the touch, I pulled my hand down and spun around to see…

“Pa…” I clamped my mouth to prevent myself from using the nickname I’d come up with. There was no doubt about it. There was Pan standing right in front of me. His clothes were different from the day before. He still wore the same black hat and mask, but this time he was wearing a gray t-shirt and royal blue jeans. He had a black sweater tied around his waist. One thing I hadn’t noticed before though, were his eyes. They were a deep, chestnut brown. I found myself wanting to stare into them, but was also quite aware with how close he was. His hand was still on the shelf where the book I was trying to grab was.

“Well,” there was that melodic voice again, “it appears I have a stalker.”

“Stalk… no wait a minute. What makes you think I’ve been stalking you?” I was so shocked and nervous by his accusation that the sentence came out in a stutter. I really hated that he thought I’d been stalking him.

“Well, haven’t you? It can’t be just coincidence that we keep running into one another. Where’s your friend? I’d think she’d want in on this too.”

Though his mouth was covered, I could tell from his eyes that he was smiling. He also smells really good. He wasn’t wearing cologne, but there was definitely a soft scent that I couldn’t pinpoint.

“How do I know you haven’t been stalking me? After all, you were the one to reach out to me first.”

I mentally patted myself on my back for sounding more confident than I felt.

“Didn't you come to LA to see me?” I watched him warily as he inched a little closer.

“Little full of yourself?” I said with a smirk. No way was I going to let this guy get under my skin.

“What makes you say that?”

“I don’t even know who you are, yet you’re saying I came all the way to LA to see you? Huh. I’d say that makes you a little full of yourself.” I applauded myself silently for that one. I’m doing much better than I thought I would.

“You don’t know me, huh? Is that why you never called me? I’ll admit, I have been accused of being too full of myself, but you’re the first to lie about not knowing who I am.”

I felt myself blush slightly as he brought up my neglect to call, but wait, “What do you mean lying? I really have no idea who you are.”

I didn’t think it was possible, but he moved even closer. “You really don’t recognize me? Perhaps I should give you a hand then.”

Taking his other hand, he slowly removed his mask. I gasped and felt as if I was about to pass out.

“Ch-cha…” I swallowed, unable to say his name.

“Oh, so you do recognize me then,” his eyes were nearly dancing with amusement.

I suddenly understood why his voice sounded so familiar and why he always wore that mask, why I should have recognized him. But there was still one thing that wasn’t adding up.

“But,” I shook my head to clear my thoughts, “how did you know I was here for the concert? I don’t recall ever telling you.”

In a mock imitation of what I assumed was supposed to be my voice, “’Do you think we’ll get a chance to meet Chanwoo?’ ‘Oh I bet his voice will sound even better in person!’ ‘Do you think they’ll get here early too?’ ‘I wonder where they’ll be staying at.’ Does any of that sound familiar?”

I felt my face begin to turn an undesirable shade of red. This was so embarrassing! I can’t believe he heard all of that.

“You really heard all of that?” my voice was quiet, barely above a whisper. My eyes were fixed on the ground.

I felt him lean in even closer, “Every word. I think it’s safe then for me to assume that I’m your bias, is that correct?” he paused, waiting for an answer that I couldn’t give, “I’ll take that as a yes. You know, you’re really cute when you’re embarrassed. I’ve never kissed a fan before, but there’s always time for a first, right?”

My head shot up in response simultaneously with my fist. Thankfully, I wasn’t aiming to punch him or anything, otherwise, he would have had a fist right to the gut. I just needed to put some distance between the two of us. To create the needed barrier, I put my right fist to his chest and pushed against him.

“What is it? I thought you’d be honored if a celebrity like me would try and kiss you,” I could see his smile now, but there was also a look of confusion in his eyes.

“Just because you’re a celebrity doesn’t mean I’m going to kiss you,” I swallowed hard to hide my nerves, “Yes, I am a fan of yours, but I don’t really know anything about you. The only thing I know is what you portray. How could I give my first kiss to someone I hardly know?”

He paused. His eyes were trained on me as if searching for an answer. Eventually, he pushed off the shelves, seeming to have finally found what he was looking for. Crossing his arms, he backed away a bit. He smiled and shook his head.

 “You’re different. Any other girl would have jumped for an opportunity like this, but you…” he let out a small laugh, shaking his head again.

I started feeling self-conscious, lowering my head again. Chanwoo barely knew me and yet, he was already pinning me as some crazy girl.

“Hey,” I tentatively looked up, “it’s cute.” He winked at me, then started walking. After a few steps he turned back around.

“Call me,” another wink, “I would like your number.”

With that, he turned around the corner and was out of sight.

I released a breath I didn’t realize I was holding. Did that really happen?