The Germaphobic Beta

TWO

Finishing things up, I stacked the last paperwork pile I just finished revising and aligned it perfectly to the left corner of my mahogany desk.

"Done," I said in a low voice and to myself as I stretched my arms.

-About f*****g time, I'm starving.

I stood and reached for the disinfecting spray and wipes.

-Forget about that s**t, just get your ass back home, T is waiting.

-Won't take long...

I wiped the desk and keyboard clean and sprayed my chair as well as the chair my mother previously sat on. I then put the disinfectant away and went to clean my hands. 

For washing my hands, I took my jacket off and rolled my sleeves up to my elbows. I then proceeded to wash my hands like a surgeon for about five minutes while humming "Creep" from Radiohead.

Once done, I put my jacket back on and picked my bag from its designated place, and headed out. After I opened my door, I noticed Mildred was still sitting at her desk. Noticeably tired from a long day of work.

"I believe I asked you to go home, Mildred," I said, feeling guilty for staying later. I should have known better. Mildred never leaves me alone. She looked tired.

"And leave you here all by yourself to the mercy of your mother and a pile of work? Nah! Either way, I had to finish tomorrow's documents. Goodness knows Minka is going to be pulling her hair out if it's not done by the morning," she asserted, trying to assure me she was fine.

"How did it go with your mom?" Mildred asked while gathering her belongings.

"Same old," I said while slightly swaying my head no.

"Oh boy! I'd give you a big hug, but I know that might make you puke," she joked with a chuckle. Mildred knew me too well.

"Yeah, I know. Don't worry," I voiced, suddenly feeling self-conscious about my stupid condition. It wasn't rocket science, I knew this influenced everything I did, and everyone around me. I had tried to fight it before but failed multiple times. Even when it was this bad, I was still doing better than before, way better.

"Come, let's get you out of here." I extended my arm towards the door.

"Yeah, yeah..." She walked to the door as I reached for the napkin in my pocket.

"Forget it! I got it." Mildred stood at the door holding it open for me.

"I could have done that."

"Oh, I'm just saving a napkin here. I do it for the environment, not for you," she said, and I stared at her with a smile. "Well, come on now! Not getting any younger here," she joked again, and I passed by her. Deep inside, I was glad she had done that.

As soon as we were out she hurried past me and pressed the elevator's button too.

"Oh, where's my head? T called before. She had something important to do, so she just left the food in the refrigerator," she said, and the elevator's door opened. "All you have to do is warm it up. I know you can manage. You know Tiana, she might have even left instructions for it too." She said pressing the button to the underground parking.

-f*****g great! King was being sarcastic.

-Don't be a jackass, you'll see her in the morning.

He went silent, and I knew he was talking to her.

King liked being around T. She was an Omega and my best friend. Tiana happened to be in charge of my meals too. She was my cook. Good thing I had her because I wouldn't trust anybody else with that.

"Take the morning off, Mildred. The conference doesn't start until noon, anyway." I said right after the doors opened, letting her exit the elevator first.

"OK. Have a good night dear." Mildred waved her hand in the air as she walked toward her car. The only car left on that side of the garage. I stood there and waited until she safely got in her car and drove away.

I walked to my car, which was parked in a secluded area, opened my car's door, and entered. Once inside, I felt relief.

After putting my bag on the passenger's seat, I cleaned my hands with hands sanitizer once more, started the car, and drove out of the garage.

-Call her.

-Give me a second. She ok?

-Yeah.

Once I was out of the building and on the main road, I pressed the number one on my phone's speed dial and listened to the phone ring in the car's speakers. After it rang for about four times, Tiana answered.

"Sup, Idris? Did King tell you?" T asked.

"Nah, this lazy motherfucker just asked me to call you," I said and heard T laugh on the other side of the line. It sounded like she was moving things around.

"Oh, King!" she sighed and laughed again. I could imagine her shaking her head like she usually did.

"It's nothing serious. My mom has her expo opening tomorrow and I promise I'll help her out." Tiana's mom, Sage, was a nurse, but lately, she started creating art. Sculptures, to be precise. She wasn't bad.

"Do you want me to send someone over?" I asked. I could order a couple of my omegas to help her out.

"Nah, we are good, it's not much." she dismissed me.

"Ok then," I said and took the exit that connected with the highway.

"The food is in the fridge."

"All right, thanks. See you tomorrow. Take care, T."

"You too, have a good night, Idris," she said before hanging up the call.

-Are you happy now?

Silence.

I knew King was pissed with me. I woke up early and worked for most of the day. King was not a fan of the office. He would rather roll in the mud and run in the wild, with all the s**t and urine that animals drop in the woods, and ticks crawling all over. Nature was full of s**t.

-You are full of s**t too.

I shook that thought off fast.

Talking about s**t, my mind ran back to my mother. I was deep in s**t. She was not going to back down. Deep inside, I knew she was right. I had to man up and settle. It was not only me I should be thinking of, our entire pack was at stake too.

Powerful families like mine were scarce. Only the strongest families carry the alpha bloodline. The problem was that many alphas had died off without heirs or their heirs had died off young. Lately, many of the older Alphas had died suddenly and without a logical explanation. My father had Aaron and me, but only one child could carry the alpha gene. The oldest. That gene only appeared on the first pregnancy.

My mother wanted me to expand the family. The more children a family has, the more likely they'll keep a hold on power, even when the heirs are not Alphas. Yes, Alphas were powerful, but a beta could always serve as an acting Alpha. There were many acting Alphas out there, but only about three dozen True Alphas. 

Alphas born from a true mate were the strongest of them all. All pups born from true mates were stronger. My mother didn't care about any of that. At least with me, she didn't. Even when finding my mate would create stronger children, she would rather have political power. Power was like a game of chess to her. This world was her board, and she would meticulously move her pieces to her advantage.

True mates could be hard to find. Some people wait their entire lifetime and never find them. Among the werewolf population, just a few had chosen to wait for theirs. The majority just moved on with their lives, dated, and got married to whoever they wanted. If their mate appeared, then they'd decide what to do after.

From the day of our eighteen birthday, our wolves could recognize our mates. There'd be an immediate and irresistible pull our wolves would feel toward them. Love at first sight, as to say.

True mates were like the other half of our souls. Somehow the gods manage to just give us a f*****g quarter of our lives to be truly ours. One-half would always belong to my mate if I was lucky enough to find her. The other half I had to share with this ass-hat. My true mate would be the better half of me, no doubt.

I exited the highway and drove the smaller, empty road that leads home.

My mom wanted me to reject my mate. Rejecting a mate would produce a substantial amount of physical pain and leave me feeling empty inside for a prolonged period of time. Some people choose to have that pain and move on with a chosen mate. Some do so for convenience, or because they already had someone they love and had a relationship or a family with before finding their true mate.

My mother was cold and cunning. She didn't think twice about rejecting her family's gardener's son. She'd been an imperious snake from day one. My dad didn't care. He was even worse than her. Ten times worse. They might not have been true born mates, but they were atrociously perfect for one another.

The selfishness of all her actions and intentions had no end. Nobody in my family truly cared about my well-being or happiness. Those were things I'll have to pursue all by myself.

I didn't need them, none of them. My family had always mistreated me. All I had left were the loyal friends I have made over the years. The closest people to me, the people I depend on. All three of them.

I took a right turn into my long driveway. My home was located in a secluded area. I had no neighbors around and I wouldn't like it any other way. It was a mid-size home. Nothing fancy as the penthouse with the city view Aaron had. I rather have a simple life away from the city filth and having to share my air duct with countless strangers.

Arriving home, I parked the car in front of the house. I had a garage, but I never brought the car inside and risked having all that dirt and contamination enter the house.

Usually, T would be home when I arrive. She'd have dinner ready, and we'd eat together. I understood how King felt, but I couldn't depend on T all the time. She had a life too. She already gave my sorry ass more than enough time.

Taking my bag, I exited the car and entered my mudroom. Shoes can't pass this point. I took them off and applied enough disinfecting spray to kill a battalion of bacteria.

I was a creature of habit, I did the same thing every day, every time I entered the house. It was compulsive, but it kept me sane.

-Ha.

-What?

-The irony.

-f**k you!

My cleaning ritual took about forty minutes. I had to clean my shoes, take my clothes off and place them in a special basket, shower, brush my teeth, and shave. I shave my face daily because I couldn't stand having hair on my face. Stuff could get stuck in it. I would even shave my chest and my...

-d**k and ass.

-And my genitals, every other week.

-And your balls too, that's always fun to watch.

-The point is that I'm smooth, clean. I nodded to myself.

-Like a f*****g baby's butt.

After my shower, I looked at myself in the foggy mirror and ran my fingers through my wet brown hair. I carefully observed my face. Dark brown eyes, pronounced eyebrows, straight nose, light skin, sharp jawline. Anyone that looked at me wouldn't be able to tell I was messed up inside. I was a failure. I had failed so many people. If I could only for once get it right...

-Don't start that s**t, will you?

I shook my head and stood straight. He was right.

-I won't. Let's eat.

After warming up the meal T left me, and washing the utensils twice to make sure they were clean, I sat and ate my food in one go. I never leave food out for too long. Bacteria can start growing in it.

Before I knew it, I was done. After cleaning my dish, I took some time to look around my house. I was the definition of a minimalist. I learned to keep my home simple with as few things as possible. The fewer things I had, the fewer things that could get dirty, the less I'd have to clean.

-The house is empty.

-I will not go through another embarrassment as I did on Tiana's eighteenth birthday. I rather have nothing here. We have what we need, nothing more, nothing less.

I tried to reassure myself, but deep inside I wished things were different. The evenings Tiana wasn't here with us were... lonely.

I took my phone and went to my room. Sitting on my bed, I stared at it for way longer than I needed to.

-Just do it.

-I have nothing to tell her, she might be busy too. I scratched my chin.

-Who cares? Just do it.

-OK.

I unlocked my screen and looked for Tiana's number. Hesitantly, I tapped a simple message, 'How is everything?'.

I felt like a useless i***t, I should have just gone there and helped. She had done so much for me and here I was, sitting my ass at home, feeling disgusted with the world.

I scratched my neck while I waited for her feedback. Ten minutes passed and Tiana hadn't replied yet. King and I hopelessly stared at the phone like idiots.

Few more minutes and I leaned against the bed's headboard.

-She must be busy.

-No s**t!

She might be driving. I wouldn't want her to answer if she was driving. Her house was about a ten minutes' drive from mine. She still lived with her mother. Tiana was the only child of a single mother. It'd been the two of them ever since Sage arrived pregnant at our pack.

I was only five months older than her. We went to school together and became friends in kindergarten.

Our pack was big, in fact, the biggest in the Northeast region. Our territory was vast, and we had a city, as well as suburban and secluded areas like mine. It didn't matter where in the territory you were, you'd always be close to a body of water. To our east, we had the ocean and to our west a lake. I wouldn't lie. Our coastal city was beautiful at times. But just from afar.

The notification on the phone went off, and I jumped.

'All good. Go to sleep. Big day tomorrow.' she replied, with a smiling face emoji. I stared at it once again for longer than I needed to. Not knowing what to say, I typed, 'Good night' and put my phone on the nightstand.

I laid back and tried to relax while concentrating on the faint, far distant sound of the waves crashing hard against the rocks.

I knew tomorrow was going to be a s**t show.