Sun and Moon Saga

Chapter 5 1/2

Chapter 5, Part 1

My life feels like a test I didn’t study for…for now.”

LISA

Two days earlier

The smell emanating from the kitchen is making its way to my room, and it’s making me want to stop packing right now. I can’t resist taking a whiff of the air that's starting to circulate in my room. As I fold a hoodie to put in my suitcase, I close my eyes, tilt my head, and guess the food based on the aroma. I sighed and salivated as I knew what my stepdad was cooking down there. I scrunch my nose in delight since I knew for sure that it’s tom yum goong. I am itching to get this luggage packed and closed so I can carry it downstairs and indulge in the delicious food. Is it strange that I am more excited about the food I am smelling than the fact that I am about to travel to Korea and live there in less than 24 hours? I should be excited about my trip but at the same time nervous. For starters, I would be alone in a foreign country where I do not speak the language. My parents will not accompany me because I will be training for the opportunity to become a K-Pop idol. It may sound absurd that a Thai girl like me would want to be an idol in Korea. Well, I have always enjoyed their music and the entire pop scene. I am a dancer, and their music is always enjoyable to dance to and occasionally sing along with. Although I do not always understand what the lyrics are saying, I just google it to get a general idea. My friends and cousins think I am crazy for wanting to audition because it’s so far away, but I know from the bottom of my heart that they will miss me, and this is their way of expressing it.

My parents, on the other hand, are extremely supportive. My mother, in particular, was the one who encouraged me to test the water. All my relatives are aware of my love for K-pop, and one day, while shopping, my mother happened to come across an advertisement announcing an open audition for YG. Her excitement when she got home remained clear in my memory, though I think my excitement surpassed hers. Without thinking, I called my close friends and relatives right away to get their assistance in creating a routine that I would like to present to them. Long story short, I blew them away with my performance, and I would be considered the first foreigner to join the company. My family right now consists of me, my mom, and my stepdad, who stood as my father figure, and I couldn’t ask for a better person to fill that void. Though they are the most encouraging people I've met, there are moments when I feel like they have more faith in me than I do in myself. Mom’s confidence in me is so high that she can toss me into the lion's den without worry, knowing that I will make it out alive. She raised me to believe that you should take advantage of every chance, and if there isn't one, create one for yourself and let history record that you worked hard and fearlessly.

Ever since I can remember, my mom has always volunteered me for every event that showcases one’s talent. Whether it was a singing competition, a dance competition, or a beauty pageant, my mother was always the first in line to write down my name and enter me. She has always told me that I was a born performer, but that kind of thing coming from your mom seems typical. I believe it is necessary for mothers to say such things. Even though I did not always particularly enjoy the extracurricular activities my mother made me participate in, I did them because I knew they made her happy and, as an only child, she had no one else to bother. And as a result, I managed to take home first place the majority of the time. When I started to appreciate all my victories, I didn’t mind participating anymore; I genuinely started to enjoy it, and performing came naturally. Since then, I have developed a work ethic where I strive to be the best in every competition I enter, and YG training is no exception.

Which takes me back to the present. I know I should be excited, but deep down, I'm going to miss my family and don't know how I'll manage to be gone for so long. But now that I'm doing this for myself, I'm doing precisely what my mother has always advised me: seize an opportunity that comes your way. I know how hard I'd work to turn my obsession into a passion of becoming a K-pop idol, and the thought of achieving this on a global scale excites me. After finally finishing my packing, I zipped and locked my luggage and started to head downstairs. I placed it near the entry along with my other baggage. I made my way to the dining room, and I smiled at the sight of my parents preparing the table. My nose may have deceived me because I assumed my chef of a stepfather was only cooking tom yum goong, but to my surprise, there was a full feast on the table. An even bigger smile formed on my face.

“Wow! Are we having company over on my last night here or something?” I said as I was amused by how much food there was.

“No, just us. Just the three of us,” mom said calmly with a stiff smile.

“What? You’re acting like you’re not capable of eating all of this,” my stepdad added.

“Well, you know me so well, Daddy.” I giggled as I gave him a tight hug from the side.

“Then what are we waiting for? All three guests are already present; let’s eat!” He ordered while he gestured for us to take our seats.

As my mother decorated my plate with portions from all the food prepared, I could not help but think about how much I would miss them. But I was confident that being on my own would provide me with a sense of independence. My mind wandered during dinner, and while I remained silent for the most part, I cherished the last meal I'm going to have with them in a long time. After we savored our last bite of the dessert my mom made, I helped her gather the dishes to take into the kitchen. As the night draws to a close, I have a feeling that she will soon let loose of the tears that she has been holding back the entire evening. In an instant, she grabbed me by the arm as if she had no plans of letting me go,and I allowed her to.

“My daughter, I may not voice enough how proud I am of you and all the accomplishments you’ve made. But know that I am. I am sometimes ashamed at how I always throw you into situations and never consult you about whether or not you actually want to do it…” she sobbed.

“Mom...” I tried to cut her off, fighting my own tears.

“...Please, let me finish. Thank you for always entertaining my ambitions for you, and this time I want you to do this for yourself and not me. I promise you, whether you succeed or not, I will always support you.” She cried, wiping the tears from her eyes.

“Thank you, too, mom, for always believing in me and for always seeing my potential before I can even discover it.” I gave her a tight hug, and we stood that way for a while.

The morning came too quickly, and I was getting ready to go to the airport. I looked around my room for the last time and closed the door behind me. I walked slowly down the stairs, and at the end of the landing, both my parents were waiting on me. We helped each other put my luggage in the car, and before my stepdad closed the trunk, a convoy of honking vehicles pulled up the driveway. A surprising farewell visit was made by my aunts, uncles, and cousins. Although I was elated to see them one last time, it made the moment feel even more bittersweet. After we exchanged hugs and farewells, I took a final look at my house, my home, and my family, and next thing I knew, I was looking out the window of the airplane with the view of Bangkok getting smaller and smaller.

The six hour flight to Seoul came to a halt. I finally arrived, and a driver from the company fetched me from the airport and took me directly to meet the CEO to welcome me. On the way there, I could not help but look out the window and see all the incomprehensible signs that looked like scribbles to me. I started to get anxious, fearing that I would not be able to communicate, and not long after, my heart began to race. Given my inability to comprehend what they are saying, how was I supposed to follow instructions? Will I make any friends? My knowledge of Korean is limited to saying hello, and they are quite particular about us only speaking Korean. I began wiping my clammy hands on my lap repeatedly, mumbling to myself as I groaned. We pulled up in front of the building, and as I entered, a pretty, petite woman greeted me.

“Welcome to Seoul, and most of all, welcome to YG, Lisa! I’m JunHa, CEO Yang’s personal secretary." She greeted me cheerfully.

“Oh! Thank goodness you speak English! Hello, Miss JunHa, it’s a pleasure to meet you!” I exclaimed, bowing my head multiple times.

"Well, since you have just arrived, we do not expect you to be fluent right away. Enjoy the fact that we can communicate, so feel free to ask me anything," she kindly offered.

"I really appreciate it. I don't want you to think I'm ignorant, but I'm not sure where I need to go or what to do right now.” I cried.

"Oh, Lisa, don't worry about it; I am at your disposal today. Your meeting with the CEO has been canceled because he has an important meeting to attend, and he has asked me to extend his apologies. So, for the next hour or so, I will assist you in getting settled," she explained politely.

I was relieved by her statement, and if only I could keep her in my back pocket for as long as possible, I would.

"Oh, okay, Miss JunHa, I really appreciate it.” I smiled at her genuinely and bowed.

She excused herself to grab her belongings from her office, leaving me to roam about the lobby and observe other trainees come and go. I couldn't help but notice how they looked at me, as if I didn't belong there. I tried to say hello, smiling and bowing, but no one reciprocate the gesture. My self-assurance in my social abilities was undermined by that. At last, Miss JunHa returned and made our way to the van parked at the front to take us to the dorms. It seemed like the company was only a few blocks away—four blocks, to be exact—and it was a short drive. To avoid getting lost on my way from the dorm to the company, I decided to memorize the route.

As soon as I got out of the van, I looked up at my new resident and took a deep breath as Miss JunHa led me inside, cradling a folder in her arms. The driver accompanied us and assisted me in carrying my luggage inside. We entered the elevator and exited on the fifth floor. She pulled out a key fob that had 510 written on it.

“Ahh, 510, it should be right down the hall.” Then she took out a paper from the folder and read, “And your roommate is Jeong Park.”

I nodded, acknowledging what she said, and she gave me the key fob to my door, which I opened slowly, hoping no one would be there. Luckily, the room was empty. The door behind us closed as soon as all of my luggage was inside my room. I walked towards the bare bed tucked against the wall and sat on the edge, facing and admiring the bed in front, neatly made and overly decorated with stuffed animals. I smiled, and Miss Junha interrupted my trance and said, “All the girls are already at the company training in their respective classes. And if you’re not too tired, you can walk over to the company, and you’re free to observe.”

“Oh, will you be accompanying me?” I asked and hoped she would reply yes.

“Unfortunately, I just received a text from the CEO asking me to run some errands.”

“I see, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be clingy, I just...” I mumbled.

“Lisa, aside from the language barrier, I think you will have no problem making friends.”

“I guess I can swing by and take a look around.”

“Yeah, that’s the spirit, and if you’re lucky enough, you might bump into someone who speaks English, but let me warn you, as far as I know, there’s only one girl who is fluent.”

“One? With my luck, Miss, I would be better off hanging a sign around my neck that reads, ‘Please talk to me in English’.” I laughed, almost meaning it.

"Oh, Lisa, stop it. Once you begin your Korean lessons, which are, as far as I know, a very comprehensive class, and based on your portfolio, you are a quick learner, I am confident you will be able to hold a conversation by the end of the week,” she cheered on.

“Wow, for my sake, I hope so. Thank you for your vote of confidence, Miss.”

We bid our farewells, and I unpacked some bed sheets and made my bed. I organized my clothes quickly in the provided dressers, looked around the dorm, and saw an adjoining door across the bathroom. I knocked and received no response, completely forgetting that everyone was at the YG building. I entered what looked to be a communal living area with a kitchenette. On the other end was another door, possibly leading to the other room. I sat on the couch, contemplating if I was going to go to the company and have a look around. I talked to myself in my head for a while in case someone happened to walk in and see me talking to myself and label me insane. I cried aloud, realizing that no one was coming anytime soon. "My life feels like a test I did not study for," I sighed, “for now.” I decided I would return to the company after convincing myself it would do me some good, hoping to run into the lone English-speaking girl.

LISA

It took me roughly ten minutes for my walk, which could have been shorter if I had not stopped every few minutes to browse through stores. I entered the lobby and flashed my ID, and the receptionist just gave me a smile. I wasn’t expecting to hold a conversation with him, so I went straight to the directory and looked through it to see where I wanted to go. The third floor seemed to have most of the dance studios, so I decided to go there first. The hallways were quiet, and to my surprise, I ran into Miss JunHa who seemed to be in a bit of a hurry.

"Oh, hey Lisa! I’m glad you decided to take my advice,” greeted Miss Junha.

“Yeah, I figured I’d look for the moon.” I beamed.

“The moon?” She asked with her eyebrows raised in confusion.

“You know, the only English speaking trainee in the company.”

“Ohhh, why would you call her the moon?” She laughed curiously.

“Well, I’m kind of walking into darkness right now, and the moon sheds light during the darkest hours,” I expressed, “ and not to mention, there’s only one. Plus, I’m pretty desperate,” I proclaimed it with a smile.

“Wow, I didn’t know there was a poet in you, Lisa,” she laughed with a side eye.

We both managed to let out a loud laugh when a woman passed by and greeted Miss JunHa with a smile. They spoke to each other in Korean, and I simply looked on. Then Miss JunHa turned to me as the other woman looked at us.

“Lisa, this is Bora, the dance instructor, and I told her that you would be observing her class, and I did disclose to her your situation, and she says you’re welcome to stay,” she explained.