Rose Wolf Petals

Crawling Out of the Hole

Josephine's POV

Smoke fills my nose and mouth. The scent of dark and bitter flames, along with the taste of ash, overwhelms me.

The crackling and snapping of burning wood followed by screams rings in my ears at full volume.

My body braces as I hit the ground and feel the hot mud beneath me.

The light from the flames danced behind closed eyelids. Snapping them open. Shock takes over my very core. I take in the surroundings, with my vision and hearing fading in and out.

Suddenly, everything sharpens and I can feel my body shift rapidly. My body shifts, bone cracking and reforming, my wolf and I heave a breath. Panting and catching ourselves.

Two large yellow eyes caught mine and became locked onto each other. As they get closer, their owner's larger form comes into my peripheral vision. White teeth snapped and broke me from my trance and I lunged. My heart is pounding a thousand beats per second, fighting for my life. I snap my teeth at the enormous wolf opponent. My teeth meet only smoke as the monster shifts in and out of solid form.

This beast dances around, clawing, biting, and connecting hits that knock me to the ground. My attacks only catch smoke between my teeth. This continues for what feels like hours. I feel the breaking of bones and the tearing of flesh. However, I will never give up. I continue, driven by the desire to live.

My ghostly opponent heartily laughs, growls, "such a desire to live but destined to die. You can not escape me. You will burn along with the rest as you should."

"I'll burn when you burn." I retorted, Rose's voice echoing mine. "You think you can just take me down. f**k you." Smiling and returning to my battle unwavered.

He scowls at my advances. "Feeble little monster, you will not win."

"Feeble? HaaahahaHA." I blatantly laughed at him. "How would you know? Unless you yourself are feeble? You are nothing but a ghost of yourself. You only haunt my dreams. You are already dead, while I am alive and I will flourish."

My eyes snap open, focusing my sight on the white ceiling fan spinning above me. Panting hard and clenching my chest. I calm myself and sit up brushing my hair back. It’s sticky with sweat and clings to the sides of my face. Not the first time having this dream and it's most likely not the last time.

I have been talking with multiple therapists. 6 months have passed since that night my life was ruined. Therapy I think has helped. The pain has never left me and my emotions are still all over the place but at least now I can function better.

I peal myself out of the bed, my sweat soaked sheets clinging to me as I get up. I remove the sheets and put them in the hamper. I have been washing them daily along with my pajamas because of the night sweats I get.

"I definitely don't want to see the water bill," I chuckle to myself and Rose chimes in, "yeah its not gonna be a pretty."

Rose has been my saving grace. My wonderful rose gold wolf that has had my back every step of the way. Don't get me wrong the Amber Forest pack has been making everything possible. They have given me a home when mine went up in flames. They have given me food and water to my hearts delight. They have given me the support I needed. Well, Lorena and Malikai have. I haven't gotten involved with the main portion of the pack at all. I pass random members once in a while but never really talked with them. I move around like a ghost to them. So try to seek me out but a majority of them avoid me. Those that have avoided me can be really broken into two groups the cautious ones who look at me like I'm going to break if they look at me for too long, like I'm a fragile piece of cracked glass. The other group, who compromise most of the young generation and people around my age, avoid me with fear and distain. Like I'm a freak of nature and they should beware of. I have no clue why.

However, I have felt red eyes seething with annoyance and comtent every time I'm with Josh, Luke, or Marco. Which gives me a good idea as to why a majority of those who glare at me females. These guys are the future of the pack. Josh is the future Alpha. Luck his future beta and Marco his future gamma.

When I first joined the pack Josh and Luke where constantly standing by. Almost as if they were guarding me. It felt reassuring but I definitely didn't help me make any female acquaintances. Over these last few months Josh has distanced himself a little more but Luke and Marco have stuck to me like glue.

I get along with those two amazingly well. Marco and I both have lost our parents. His parents died in the line of duty protecting the pack from a rogue attack. The current acting Gamma Jackson and his mate took in Marco. Luke was there when they found me and he looks at me like a little sister. A I found her now I have to loom after her kind of a deal. Josh was like that in the beginning, but he moved to watching more at a distance and not talking much stance now. Hovering and not interacting much. He doesn't look at me with fear or agitation but his girlfriend, Mellie, sure as hell wants me dead or gone at least.

Today I have a meeting with Elder Josephine, Elder Edgar, Alpha Malikai and Luna Lorena. They want to get together to go over the next steps for my future or what not. Everytime I think about the future my blood runs cold and I get extremely stressed out but the future is wants instore. I can't run from it and can't hide from it either. My mother and father would definitely not want that. It's the least I can do for them is to survive. Not to make their sacrifice be in vain. Well that's my reasoning for making myself crawl out of the hole I just want to curl up in.

I get my clothes ready for the day. Fresh underwear, bra, a black t-shirt, some jeans, my green vans, and my green light jacket that almost perfectly matches the vans on color. I then grab my towel and head to the showers to wash way my night and prepare for the "future" today has to offer me.