Stranded and Lost

CHAPTER : 3

White is supposed to make you feel peaceful, while yellow happy. Red, romantic and green warm. There are several colours in this kingdom with different symbolism, with each one of them standing as a base for several shades and uncountable hues. Nevertheless, what matters the most is the relativity. If all the humans, all of us, had same perspectives then the world would have been a very boring place to live in. No diversity, nothing dynamic but just the still water with none of the beautiful rippled waves on it.

It was cold here, colder than I expected it to be. The warmth of the hospital bed almost made me forget what it felt like to stand up, to walk, touch things other than the white cotton sheets and the needles that were plunged into my skin. I forgot how it felt to smell the fruity smell of shampoo, the soft glide of soap on my skin, the cold shower of water hitting my numb back and most of all the sound of anything but silence and the quiet beeping of the heart monitor. Everything was a song to me. Even the pitter patter of water gliding down my body and dripping down on the floor.

My hair, which was dark red the last time I saw it, was almost black now. The waves non-existent as it took the shape of the slithering water. Mystified by the beauty of it, I just stood there underneath the cold shower, motionless. All of this felt new to me and truth be told, I don't even remember anything that might have happened before I woke up in that hospital bed.

A gentle sigh escaped my lips, for the first time I let myself to lose my guard. Everyday, I sat in that hospital bed and watched a nurse or a doctor checking my vitals, asking me different questions. The questions they asked were very simple yet the answers were complicated. It took me sometime to come up with a suitable answer. My replies were mostly a nod or a small yes but whenever he would ask me about how I was feeling, the answers ended up being fine when I was far from being anything but that. Occasionally the grey eyed person would visit me too. He never said anything to me except for some greetings and subtle stares. His presence made me feel uncomfortable, more so because he knew who I was, and I didn't.

I didn't even know my name.

Lifting up my face toward the shower, I closed my eyelids and threw my shoulders back. There was an unknown void inside of me, that made me feel so empty and lonely yet, I enjoyed the feeling of being removed. Loneliness has been my friend here and especially in moments when the people around me didn't answer any of my questions. There was a small part of me which didn't want to know the answers in fear of finding something horrific but the larger and more stubborn part of me was curious. The pitter patter of the water droplets on my eyelids hypnotised me in its rhythms and focus my senses on what I saw so far.

Conspicuous stares, Pitiful eyes and longing glances.

I waited everyday for someone, for anyone to call me out by a name but no one did. Even the nurses had their mouths zipped although they were friendly for most of the part. Sometimes I would see the man talking to one of the doctors outside the door. The small window that gave me the advantage to see through, didn't let me hear anything but it was enough for me to decide whom to trust and whom not to.

A sudden knock on the closed bathroom door broke me from my reverie. I heard a murmur from the other side but I couldn't understand what was said due to the running shower. Without wasting any time, I quickly turned off the shower and wrapped myself in a towel to cover myself before I opened the door. A few breaths later, I slightly pried the door open and peeked from inside at the sudden intervention I received. Greeted with a sweet smile, I tried to return it back and failed miserably as an awful and awkward grin took over my face.

“Here are your clothes, honey. Do you need anything else?" The smile on the kind nurse's face didn't falter a bit while she talked to me. I opened the door a little more and gratefully took the clothes from her. Her name was Greta I think. Somewhere in her late twenties, she was the sweetest and kindest person I have ever met.

"No, thank you. That will be all." I nodded my head at her and closed the door once again and pressed my back on it.

Today I was leaving the hospital and although I had mixed feelings about it, I was more than eager to find where I was. Finally I was going to get some exposure to the world and the answers that everyone denied.

It was weird for me to wear something that was not the hospital gowns. I was kind of used to it. The fabric felt so different than my previous attire. It was refreshing and excited me quite a bit. Such a sudden change was quite a lot to take in but I was more than ready to experience the world outside. Some undergarments, a pair of jeans and a top after, I was ready with my soaking wet hair dripping water all over my dry clothes. My shoulder length hair was quite a lot to deal with as I placed the towel over my head and rubbed it a couple of times until my hair was a little dry. While doing so, I opened the door and exited the bathroom with my eyes on the floor until I crashed into a hard slab body.

I lost my balance and my wet feet slipped on the floor but before I could fall, two pair of strong hands grabbed me and hoisted me up.