Playing Our Song

Chapter 2

Chapter 2Jase slid into his car and pulled out of the parking lot, following Garrett until he turned off the road. Jase caught his smile in the rearview mirror. It’d been a good night. They’d spent most of their time discussing music, and Jase couldn’t believe how much they had in common. They shared many of the same musical influences. Jase could see himself hanging out with Garret more often.

It’d been a long while since Jase had made friends outside his tight circle. He’d grown up with the guys from the band, all living within a four-block radius. And though he’d only dated Andrew for five years, it felt longer. Other friends were harder to find.

The problem wasn’t Jase closing himself off or that he and the other guys were too close to let anyone else in. The difficulty rested with them being part of the band. People wanted to hang out with them. Unfortunately, the people hadn’t wanted to make friends with who they were; the people acted more interested in what they were—the band. Especially since the group had become so big. And now, Andrew with his career, he dealt with the same issue. Although Andrew hadn’t seemed as bothered by it as Jase. The difference was, Andrew had always searched for attention, and with his fame, he found it, but for Jase, that part of fame was his least favorite.

So, meeting Garrett and talking with him was nice. He hadn’t thrown off the vibe of only being interested in the possibility of Jase doing something for him or his career. Garrett hadn’t a clue regarding Jase’s identity, and he kind of liked that. He appreciated standing on an even footing with the guy. And when Garrett found out, which he would if they hung out, Jase was sure it wouldn’t matter.

Jase walked into the house more energized than he should be. He gave half a thought to heading to bed, but instead grabbed a beer and opened the bottle as he proceeded to the great room.

He sat on the sofa and put his feet up on the footstool. His thoughts went to Garrett. The guy was good. Really good. He could sing, play the guitar, and write—a triple threat.

Jase took a sip of his beer and closed his eyes. With the image of Garrett singing his final song fresh in Jase’s imagination, a melody popped into Jase’s head.

Startled at first he sat frozen. It only lasted for a second, before he rushed to his bookshelf and checked through a pile of notebooks, trying to find one with empty pages. Back on the couch, as his heart raced, he wrote. The notes flowed onto the page with barely any forethought. It’d been a while since inspiration had last hit. A long enough while that he’d felt concerned and thankful for having a backlog of songs he and his band could use for their upcoming album.

For the next three hours, Jase stayed in the zone, writing as fast as the pencil scribbled the words and notes. Some he’d rework, but he refused to worry about that now. Just the fact he had a base to work with was awesome.

His hand cramped and forced him to stop. He checked the time and did a double take, not sure how it’d gotten so late—or early as it was. His stare locked on the pages in his hand, and he smiled. He’d just had his best writing session in too long, and he had a strange feeling he knew what was, or rather who was, the one that inspired him.

Even though he hated to stop, he threw the notebook onto the coffee table and stretched while he let out a hearty yawn.

As he lay in bed, his mind still fiddled with the music, but his body lay too weak to move.

What felt like moments later, his tongue slid over his dry lips and back into his parched mouth. He peeked from under his pillow, searching out his glass of water, and his stomach sank. The room sat brighter than it should. He pushed himself up and grabbed his phone. He stared at the screen, his brain too foggy to register what he was seeing. When his head cleared, he realized his fuckup. He’d set the alarm for everyday but Friday, and now he’d overslept.

He dialed Kiefer’s number to tell the guys he’d be late. He hoped the reason he’d stayed up the night before would calm their anger. They’d all relate to getting caught up in the magic.

* * * *

Jase fought to stay asleep, but the sun reflected into his eyes, waking him. For a split second, his mind fought to remember what day it was. Had he overslept again? A smile formed on his face. It was Monday, and after hooking up with the guys for practice on Friday, Jase had come home and locked himself in the house for the rest of the weekend writing songs. His smile grew, and a warmth engulfed him. It’d been too long since inspiration had struck, and this past weekend he’d been on fire. He wasn’t sure of the cause he just prayed it stuck with him.

He hopped out of bed and pulled on a pair of sweats and a T-shirt. Jase’s heart rate picked up, and excitement rushed through him. He’d spend the day tweaking what he’d written so far, and then later he’d meet Garrett.

The day turned into another great one. Ideas poured out of Jase, and this was the first time in a long while that he accepted he might just get this new album done.

He stood up to get a drink and spotted the time. s**t. The day had gotten away from him, and it felt great. Better than great.

He’d had issues since getting back from the band’s last tour. His creativity had dried up, and he’d been nervous thinking he’d lost the ability to write anything. Well, anything he could use. Not sure how to handle it, he never mentioned it to the guys.

Jase stared at the notebook pages spewed in front of him, and his leg bounced from the rush of adrenaline racing through him. He gave half a thought to whether he should keep his ass seated and try to write more. But he remembered his plans and wrapped up for the day.

He rushed through a shower, then padded over to his closet, where he picked out a pair of blue jeans—the holes made through fashion rather than wear. Next, he plucked a black T-shirt off the hanger. He slid the soft cotton on, liking the fit. Then he finished the outfit with his black biker boots. He stared at his reflection in the mirror. His hair resembled a well thought out muddled mess, which he liked, and his eyes, green surrounded by a black ring on a regular day, were almost all black on this day. He blamed the hue on the day’s scruff that he chose not to shave. His five o’clock shadow always caused his features to appear darker, and he liked the look.

He checked his watch. He had time for a quick snack before he had to meet Garrett. Jase grabbed chips from the cabinet and poured the salsa he’d found into a bowl. Ready to sit, he figured he’d catch up on current events as he ate. He bypassed the television and instead strode to the front yard and grabbed the newspaper. A smile tugged at his lips. His friends always laughed at him for choosing paper news over internet news. It was his way to remember where he started.

Since it’d been just Jase and his mom after his dad passed away, Jase had always wanted to help her out any way he could. Right after his eleventh birthday, he’d gotten a paper route. And he knew today, just like back then, kids had limited employment choices. So, Jase purchased one-thousand copies of the newspaper for kids to deliver to seniors living in his community each week, then he’d pay them for each newspaper they delivered. It was his little way of giving back. He wanted kids in his neighborhood to have more of a choice than just babysitting.

Back in the kitchen, Jase brought a dipped chip to his mouth as he thumbed through the paper. Opened to the entertainment section, Jase froze in place. Heat flushed through his body, and the chip fell from his hand. There, pictured as real as life, was his boyfriend sitting on the lap of another man with an expression of ecstasy on his boyfriend’s face and the man’s lips on Andrew’s neck. It felt as if all the air was sucked out of the room. “What the hell?” Jase struggled to tear his gaze away long enough to read the blurb underneath. Andrew’s expression had Jase’s focus glued to the page. He wasn’t sure how long he sat motionless with heat crawling up his back. He forced his stare to the words accompanying the picture. His heartbeat raced as his brain prayed that it was a new advertisement Andrew had forgotten to mention.

Instead of a sales pitch for the latest cologne, the story mentioned the two men out at a club together. Jase squeezed his eyes shut and hoped for a different picture when he opened them. He looked at the picture again. Andrew’s eyes stared back at Jase, taking all his focus and almost made him miss the ringing of his phone.

“Hello,” he muttered, not paying attention to the call.

“Hey, Jase. Thought I’d check-in.” Andrew’s voice was smooth.

Confusion raced through Jase’s mind. He tried to put the voice together with the picture in front of him but had trouble.

“Hey, you there?” This time, Andrew whined and snapped Jase back into the now.

“Um. Yeah. I’m here.”

“I asked what you’re doing tonight.” Andrew’s voice sounded hoarse as if he’d been yelling.

“Working on music.” Jase barely knew what he was saying, let alone why his answer was evasive. He had nothing to hide. Not like Andrew did.

“I had a shoot today, and now they have us doing a night one. They want to capture the lights of the city. They’re working us like dogs.”

“Yeah, it looks it.” Jase regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. He didn’t want to start the conversation with accusations. He didn’t want to start a fight just because of his tone. He needed to give Andrew the benefit of the doubt.

Andrew huffed into the phone, telling Jase he missed something the other man had said.

“I’m sorry. What?” Jase closed his eyes and waited for the fallout from his not paying attention as he fought his mind from bringing back the image in the picture.

“I asked what you said. But—whatever.” Andrew sighed. “I’m exhausted. They think because they flew us here, they can use us twenty-four seven.”

Knowing nothing he said would placate Andrew when he complained about his job, Jase went with a safe, “Sorry.”

“Yeah, it sucks.”

“Sorry,” Jase said again.

“Yeah. I know.” Andrew covered the phone and mumbled something to someone else in the room. “I only have a few minutes before I leave.”

Close to ending the call, Jase couldn’t help where his thoughts kept going. His stomach churned as the image of Andrew and the other guy crashed back in his head.

The last thing he wanted to do was fight, but his concern grew, and he had trouble holding down his anger since he’d answered the phone. He needed Andrew to explain what the hell was happening. He needed the truth. Before he could give it any thought, “I saw a picture of you in the paper,” raced out of his mouth.

“Oh, yeah? How did I look?” Other people in the background talked to Andrew, stealing his attention. Andrew called out to them, “Wait, I’ll be out in a minute.” When he spoke to Jase again, his voice sounded rushed. “Which ad is it?”

“It’s not an advertisement. It looks like you’re at a club.”

“Oh yeah. The paparazzi are everywhere we go. I can’t seem to lose them. Although I wouldn’t want to. Any publicity is good publicity. Right?”

“I guess. But there’s someone else in the picture with you. Another—”

“Yeah, they have us taking all kinds of shots. There was another group working on a different campaign we met up with after dinner. The photographers decided it would be great for us all to take pictures together. It’d get our names and faces out there, and in doing so, it’d help cross-promote the products or something. Yeah, so that’s probably what you saw.”

Was that what Jase saw? The picture appeared more personal, but maybe that’s how the photographer had wanted it. s*x sells. f**k. Even thinking that’s what he’d seen wasn’t helping Jase feel any better.

“Listen, sweets. I have to go. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Okay. I—” Before Jase got the full sentence out of his mouth, Andrew hung up.

Jase lost his appetite. He scraped the bowl of salsa into the garbage and put the chips back in the pantry. His watch said he had time before he needed to leave.

He glanced at the table, to his computer sitting on it. His mind still raced from the picture as he flipped open his laptop, and not giving it any thought, fired it up. His brain fought what he planned to do. Not waiting for the verdict, Jase’s fingers flew over the keyboard, typing Andrew’s name into the search bar. His pointer hovered over the enter key. Ready to press it, he pulled back his hand and fisted it. Had he really wanted to do this? Go down this road?

He attempted to come to grips with what he hoped to gain. Had he thought he’d find something? Had he not trusted Andrew? Not trusting him was a cause for concern, and Jase wasn’t sure he was ready to admit there was any. Hell, that picture could have been for publicity, staged by the photographer. The guy was probably one of the other models, and the powers that be, like Andrew had said, thought it would be useful for the campaigns, having them pictured together—whether in the news or in person.

The sour taste in Jase’s mouth and the knot in his stomach weren’t buying the story. He moved his fists to his eyes and rubbed. Then he asked himself again if he really wanted to search Andrew’s name. Regardless of what he’d find, if he continued with the search, his and Andrew’s relationship would change forever. Jase’s heart felt ready to pound out of his chest. Jase took a deep breath and opened his eyes.

His finger went to the backspace key and remained pressed until Andrew’s full name disappeared. Then Jase shut his computer and stood. It was up to him to either trust the other man or admit defeat. And right then, he wasn’t ready to admit anything. They’d been together for a lot of years since before Jase, and Alternative State had become famous, and although they might fight, Andrew had never given Jase a reason to doubt his faithfulness. So why start now? Jase walked to his backyard, stood in the fresh air, and took a deep breath. He longed to clear his head.

Jase stepped back inside a while later and saw it was time to go. He grabbed his backpack and headed out the door.

He arrived at the coffee shop and sat in the back, positioned to see the door and know the minute Garrett passed through it. He locked away the earlier drama for another time.

Getting together with Garrett and discussing songs and writing was what Jase needed right then.

The moment Garret walked in, the air thickened. He stood at the door, glancing around the diner. He spotted Jase, and Garrett’s smile grew, lighting up the entire room.

Jase stood to shake his hand.

“Hey, man. I’m so sorry.”

Jase’s gaze went to his watch, confused why Garrett apologized. He arrived right on time. “Okay. But why?”

Garret’s complexion reddened, and his gaze went to his hands, now gripping the back of the chair. “Because I’m an i***t?

Jase shook his head. “Okay. I’m still not understanding.” Jase’s stomach dropped. He didn’t think he’d like whatever Garrett had to say.

“Because I didn’t realize who you were the other day,” Garrett whispered.

Relief washed through Jase and made him weak in the knees. He fell back into his seat and smiled.

“You looked familiar; I just couldn’t place you.” Garrett’s stare moved off his hands and took in every inch of the room. Every inch except the part where Jase sat.

Jase continued to smile in hopes of calming Garrett, whose stance remained stiff. “It’s all good, really,” Jase said, meaning it. Even if he had thought it’d been nice, Garrett hadn’t figured out Jase was famous. Not that Garrett knowing who Jase was would change anything. Jase had only met Garrett once, but based on his impression of Garrett, Jase didn’t think Garrett’d be the type of person who’d act differently around a person because of who they were. “It’s not going to be a problem, is it?”

“No. Um. Of course not. Why would it be?” Garret’s words didn’t match his nervous expression or his hands fidgeting with the strap of his backpack.

“Sometimes, people realize who I am, and things get weird.”

Garret’s posture relaxed, and his features softened. “Nope. No worries. It won’t get weird. At least not on purpose.”

Garrett sat, and Jase released the breath he was holding.

Then Garrett smiled, and Jase joined him.