Breaking Through

Chapter 19

19

Gui

I had a slight idea of the time Hilary got off work, so I showed up half an hour before and waited on the sidewalk. I walked up and down the street, kicked loose stones on the pavement, watched the cars go by, browsed f*******:, answered some emails, and waited.

Over an hour later, I thought about going inside and asking for Hilary. Maybe she had gone home early, and here I was, a freaking puppy waiting with a sad face. Or maybe she had listened to me and taken the day off. God knew she needed to rest after what happened yesterday.

I closed my eyes as rage coursed through my veins. I couldn’t even remember it without my blood boiling. And when my mind went further and I thought about what could have happened if I hadn’t decided to go running yesterday. That bastard could have raped her, killed her. I clenched my fists and allowed my rage one more minute before I got it under control.

I counted to twenty and took three long breaths. Then, I reached for the front door, but it opened before I could touch it and Hilary stepped out.

She halted when she saw me. “Gui? What are you doing here?”

“Hey, Hil.” I took off my baseball hat, ran my hand through my hair, and tucked the hat on my head again. “I … I just wanted to make sure you were safe today.” I glanced to the sides. No signs of any evil characters.

“Oh, hm.” Her cheeks reddened. “Thanks.”

“I’ve brought you something,” I said, grabbing her little gift from the back pocket of my jeans. I handed it to her.

With a frown, she picked up the small red plastic bag and spied inside. “Pepper spray.”

I shrugged. “I hope you never have to use it, but I thought that, after what happened yesterday, it might make you feel safer.”

“That’s … that’s a good idea. Thanks.” She turned the pepper spray in her hands, and then put it inside her purse. She opened her mouth, and then closed it again.

I took a step toward her. “What?”

She wrapped one hand around the strap of her purse, squeezing it tight. “Last night, after you brought me home, I was thinking that I should know how to defend myself.” She shook her head once, making her blond hair spill over her shoulders. “I don’t know why I didn’t think of this before, right after what Eric—” She pressed her mouth tight. “Anyway, I heard of a self-defense class, and even though my size—” She gestured to her delicate frame. “—might be a disadvantage, I could learn how to break free long enough to run or call for help.”

“That is a great idea,” I said. Pride filled my chest. “Do you have a place in mind?”

“No. I’m going to research more online this weekend. I remember seeing a flyer at the women’s center my mom and I go to, but it won’t start for another eight weeks. I don’t want to wait that long. I’m sure I can find a class somewhere.”

“No need to research.” I took a step toward her and grabbed her hand. “I know just the place.”

I pulled her with me, to my Jeep, which was parked across the street.

“Wait, hm, my car is in the parking lot.”

“I can drive you back here afterward, if that’s okay,” I suggested, opening the passenger door for her.

Hilary stared at me, those green eyes wreaking havoc in me. “Okay,” she whispered.

She hopped in the Jeep. I closed her door and rushed to the other side. When I slid into the driver’s seat, Hilary had already buckled and she sat completely still.

“Are you okay?” I asked. She nodded, glancing at me for a second, before returning her attention to her purse on her lap. “Have you changed your mind? You don’t have to do this now, you know.”

She looked at me, her eyes conveying much more than she let on. “I know. It’s okay. Let’s do this now.” She sighed. “If I don’t, I might spend too much time researching and thinking about doing this and never actually doing it.”

Instinct hit me and I reached over, grabbing her hand. “I’m proud of you for taking action.” I squeezed tight.

She stared at our hands. “Thanks,” she whispered, squeezing my hand back.

It felt too f*****g good to have her hand in mine. I had to control myself not to entwine our fingers. To not tug her to me. To not pull her into my lap. To not grasp her hips and leaned her down to me, and not to claim—

Clearing my throat, I pulled my hand away. “All right. Let’s go.”

The drive took only a couple of minutes. Hilary eyed the building as I parked my Jeep in the parking lot. I remembered the first time I saw it years ago. The building looked like a gray box with a few windows, and in desperate need of a new paint job. The metal sign In Shape over the door looked precarious, like it was going to fall at any second.

“I know it doesn’t look like much,” I said, killing the engine. “But it’s a good place. The guys and I come here at least three times a week to work out.”

“They offer self-defense classes here?” she asked.

“Sim. Once every two or three months, I think. Let’s go in and check it out.”

I opened the front door for her. As we walked to the reception desk, I noticed she scanned the place, taking it all in. At least it looked better on the inside. New flooring, well taken care of machines, updated couches in the waiting area, a nice snack bar, and in the back, the lockers and the large classroom with a wooden floor, a mirrored wall, and a glass wall that overlooked the main gym floor.

“Hello, Gui,” the receptionist said with a smile.

“Hi, Janice,” I said. Hilary snapped her attention to the receptionist. “This is Hilary. She’s interested in self-defense classes.”

“Oh.” Janice looked at Hilary from head to toe and back, her expression disgusted.

I suppressed a sigh. Janice had been flirting with me since she started working here a few months ago, and even though I knew she was serious about hooking up, I wasn’t. I wouldn’t sleep with her once, twice, three times at most, then send her away, just to have to see her all the time here. It would be too awkward. And who knew how she might react? She could try to sabotage one of the machines so the weights fell on me and killed me. I had vengeful girls attack me like that before. I knew it was bound to happen again.

If I ever slept with a random girl again.

I glanced at Hilary.

She knew about my reputation and she probably had heard the worst version, the one that was ten times worse than the truth. I never treated a girl badly, not before, during, or after being with her. All the girls knew that I didn’t like getting too involved before hooking up with me—I wasn’t trying to be a jerk. It just wasn’t in me. I had my career and my family to keep my mind and heart filled. I always thought that was enough.

Until now.

Hilary was also watching Janice, her eyes narrowed. f**k. Knowing my reputation, Hilary probably thought I had already slept with the receptionist.

“So,” I said, breaking the sudden weirdness in the air. “Any classes opening soon?”

Janice turned her attention to the computer screen behind the desk. “Nope. The next one is scheduled to start in October. If we have enough sign-ups.”

“s**t,” I muttered.

Janice looked from me to Hil and back again. “But a new class started last week. I think John could be convinced to let you join.”

John was the gym’s owner. He was always around when the guys and I were working out, and he always talked to us. He was a nice guy in his late fifties. I was sure I could convince him to let Hilary join in the class.

“Nice,” I said. “I’ll talk to John. When is the next class?”

“Wednesday next week,” Janice said. She pulled out a clipboard and form from under the desk and looked at Hilary. “If you could fill out this form, please, I’ll enter your name on the class roster.”

“Thanks,” Hilary said, taking the form.

She took a few steps back and sat down on one of the couches.

I sat beside her, careful not to be too close though. I knew how she could snap and feel crowded. Especially after yesterday.

As she filled out the form, I took my time and looked at her, really looked at her. And, Meu Deus, once more it hit me, taking away my breath, how beautiful she was. I had never seen a more beautiful woman in my entire life, and I had seen a lot of women.

But Hilary was special. She was above all others.

Her hair was pulled to one side, over her shoulder, and I just now noticed she was wearing a thin scarf around her neck. On a hot summer day.

Without thinking, I reached over and pulled the scarf down. I sucked in a sharp breath and rage flooded my body as I took in the red marks around her neck.

With wide eyes, Hilary pulled the scarf back up, and let her hair fall like a curtain between us as she continued filling out the form. Now her hands were shaking and she could barely write.

Feeling like a jerk, I grabbed her hand in mine, squeezing the pen between our palms, and with my other hand, brushed her hair back, so I could see her pretty face.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “About not being there sooner yesterday and—”

“That wasn’t your fault.”

“—for pulling your scarf just now. I didn’t mean to spook you again.”

She looked at me, her green eyes shining with unshed tears. “It’s … it’ll be okay.”

Again with the “will be” okay. I hated that. I wanted her to be okay now.

I lifted her hand and placed a kiss on her knuckles. “If you ever need help or … anything, you know where to find me.”

One corner of her lips curled up and she nodded. Then she pulled her hand from mine, wiped her unshed tears, and went back to the form.

While I started imagining all the ways I could break Mike if I ever found him again.