Love or dignity

Just

Just drownTaking a deep breath, I changed my clothes and straight to bed. I tried all types of meditations and did not have an idea when my eyes went shut.

After an hour of sleep:

Sometimes when you feel things are no more as what you understand, or feel yourself drowning in mire created by your own, then just drown.

Do not fidget, or try hard, pressurizing yourself to cope up.

Just leave.

The best would happen.

This is the only way to save yourself from losing the pride and self respect you have in your own eyes.

Let people judge, but the day you judge yourself is the day you lose your angel that would make you alive.

This is nirvana stage.

I was laughing.

Laughing on myself, my condition, my mind.

Life plays so well.

You never see that coming. You see nothing coming.

You can just play along. Suffer when it makes you do that, laugh when it makes you do that.

Nothing is because of you. You think you are playing, but actually you are being played.

I connected phone with my TV and turning on Netflix, went to kitchen to find something to eat. Taking snacks and cold drinks, I myself one with the sofa.

This is so enjoyable moment, when you feel nothing. I laughed hard on every pun and also lame joke. One after the other snack and series till it was time for the dinner party.

The company that got inaugurated this morning, had a dinner party for its employees.

Geiger Games and animations before, but it was now overtaken by YGGR, Yengi Gaming Revolution and co.

The building changed and some employees changed. Nothing else! The changes might have occurred in higher level posts that had nothing to do with regular employees, because their boss remained the same, their bosss boss remained the same, and about positions higher than that, they did not know.

“Lets go together. Do you mind”

I heard on phone. It was Stacy, one of my colleague.

“I will come to pick then. Be ready by six latest.” I told.

It is a tradition that needs to be followed.

If you tell six, a girl would never get ready before seven.

One hour for touch up.

I knew it was a big party so I too have it an extra shot to look good, so that nobody notices me and just let me pass by among the other girls, some sluts, some geeks. I wore a woolen handknitted dress that the one of the most expensive one I had in my wardrobe, to be honest the only expensive on Ethan t I use in every part, every special occasion and event. Some people even remember this dress but do not question whereas some do gather courage and ask if this was the one I had worn during last Christmas or school's annual function.

I picked her up and we left for the address. It was a Grand Hotel. Inside people and interiors equally lavish. Parties are the only place where we can show what a bling closet we have, cause those clothes are not for everyday. I was not the most beautiful or stunning, but nor anybody else was. Everybody tried their bests, in fact the one with a bit dull or worn clothes or a bit casual clothes were to be noticed, because there were hardly any of them.

'Hey! Hello!'

'How are you?'

'New workplace. When would we see our offices now?'

'we are a part of YGGR now or its subunit?'

'What do we call ourselves. Lol'

Everybody was busy talking, introducing, boys checking out girls, girls checking out photos, photos checking out filters that would turn no soul beautiful, souls checking out towards their soulmates.

“Weather is a bit chilly. My skin gets so much dried up. I am just emptying bottles of lotions and body oils.” I told Stacy.

“Hey. How are you? and where is your boyfriend” Stacy and I stood next to someone she knew.

“He would not come. He said this place is too far and he is no tinterested.” He said.

“Adrian, you should go to his place then to pick up. Just because he did not want to come, you were ok with that reason. Oh these boys nowadays.”

“Oh please. Here comes, another beautiful lady.” He said as some other of from his colleague maybe joined us.

Three more boys joined us to talk and we were all talking among ourself. As people changed in that circle, leaving and coming, I was glued to my position.

After a bit I decided to check on if my hair were placed perfectly or not and check on my lipstick I decided to goto washroom.

On asking a waiter, I came to know it was on the first floor. So if you are in urgency to use a washroom, get prepared. I called the lift, waited till it caem from 24 floor to 3rd floor and got in and pressed for 1st floor.

As the door were about to close, a man came walking in a paced up speed of almost running and got in.

I looked up and stopped the lift for him and bingo he wanted to reach the same place, for a bit different purpose.

The man, tall and a bit lean but muscular, in his white Chinese collar shirt, denim winter jacket on it, dark blue untextured internally knitted ankle length jeans, white plain rich sport shoes and nicely put hair.

But he was in more dire state than me looking at the way it was so urgent for him to reach the washroom. Money doesn't buy this comfort, I see.

Does he really not remember me?

Hey dude, really?

~~~~~~~

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