Tonight was Owen's birthday.
That fawning, pathetic version of me felt filthy.
Even though I had already rotted from the inside out, on a day as special as today, I still wanted to hold on to one tiny piece of myself that was clean.
But when Evan threw the money at me, I was filthy all over again.
*****
After the farce finally ended, I dragged my limp body back home.
The cake I had bought for Owen was still sitting on the table, the candles already burned down to nothing.
But I no longer dared to go near it.
My stomach churned violently, and I rushed into the bathroom.
I did not know if it was because I had drunk too much, or because I was so dirty that even I felt sickened by myself.
I could not stop throwing up.
'Owen, ever since you left, I have not been okay at all. Please have mercy on me. Save me one more time.'
