Secrets in A Small Town

13

She scrolls through the page quickly to discover a YouTube video attached to the bottom. She pulls her headphones out of the center consol and plugs them in, turning on the video. She sets her phone down and listens.

"Hello, my name is Regina Guiness, I am a psychologist at the United Center of Human Health Services here in Phoenix, Arizona. I'm here today to tell you the story of a young man I met years back, named Nicky.

I first met Nicky when he was just ten years old. He had just been adopted after years of being bounced back and forth between foster homes. He was a shy, bright eyed child. He was...very small in stature, standing about six inches shorter than anyone his age." Brooke glances down at the photo running across the screen.

"They had brought Nicky in for family counseling. They we're worried he was not clicking very well with the new family.

The first few sessions seemed relatively normal. Nicky was very shy and tended to keep to himself. It wasn't until a few weeks later his dad told me that he was having episodes where he would urinate in his pants, every day.

They stated they had taken him to many doctors and been doing excessive tests and scans to look for any abnormalities, but had come up empty.

So he began wondering if he was doing this out of defiance...and that was when it clicked.

This child had psychological bladder disorder.

So what is a psychological bladder disorder? Well, most humans typically become able to control their bladder completely by age five. In cases like this, children who have gone through extreme traumatic events sometimes don't develop the same, psychologically. Meaning, his bladder is physically fully developed and able to function properly, it is the brain that sends sporadic signals that these individuals are not able to control."

Brooke paused the video and a chill goes up her spine. She looks back over to Cade, who is still sound asleep. She resumes the video.

"I have worked with many people, of all ages, suffering from bladder complications. As you can imagine this is a very degrading and embarrassing illness. Most of them were very shy, reserved. They didn't like to go out because of the worry. They didn't have friends and would often even shy away from family.

Nicky was no different. He was not I would work with him on trying to figure out his underlying issue was. He was not able to connect with his new family and as you can imagine that was taking a toll on his new parents.

I worked with Nicky for another three years and the incidents he was having were actually getting worse, with him, beginning to go through puberty. While his classmates began joining clubs and sports, dating, he was at home, hiding, because, you know, he was scared. And that is not a good feeling for anyone.

That was until Nicky met Ava. I remember him coming in for his bi-weekly session with the biggest smile on his face. Ava was the first friend that he had and soon it developed into a relationship. And he comes in one day and he goes "Gina, I have to tell her."

And I said, "Well, Nicky, this has been going on for a while now, and she seems like a truly wonderful girl. I think that is a good idea.".

He came back the next week absolutely glowing. He had said Ava didn't even care.

In the months after that, he began to notice his bladder seeming to get stronger. While he was still wetting the bed at night, he was able to hold his bladder for a couple hours, whereas before he was going every thirty minutes. Another year goes by and it seems to have subsided almost completely, and here I am looking at him, now 6'1 with these big muscles, he tells me he is trying out for the rugby team. [Laughs]

And even still, I can't seem to connect that little boy I met so many years ago to this confident young man he is today, and it's all because of Ava.

Now, I have done extensive research on this and every story I find, every person I talk to always says the same thing:

All these people need is one person. After being degraded all these years, just one person to believe in them. One person to love them, unconditionally. To help them work through their issues and stand by them. As far as psychological issues fly, 95% if these cases had subsided by early adult years for the one's who found just one friend.

I think that says a lot."

Brooke rips the headphones out, suddenly feeling very hot. Her forehead is sweating and her hands have started to shake.

She has never thought about what causes Cade to have accidents. She never in a million years would have thought it was all in his head. It makes sense though, why sometimes he can hold it, so much for so long and other times he can't go 45 minutes without wetting himself.

She stays quiet the rest of the ride home as Cade sleeps. He needs it, honestly. She drives immedietly to his house. Her mind is still racing when they get there.

She watches him for a moment, he looks so at peace. No one Would ever know how much he went through, what still goes through.

She nudges him awake. He blinks a few times and smiles, wiping a bit of drool off the side of his mouth. He blushes.

"That was a short trip." He laughs.

"For you maybe, sleepyhead."

"Sorry, just...don't always sleep the best, you know?"

She takes his hand and squeezes it.

"It's okay, honey."

They go inside. The house is freezing after leaving the air conditioner on over night. It hits them both like an arctic wind when they open the door. Brooke jumps and Cade goes still. His pants begin to grow dark.

Brooke notices immediately. Cade's face starts twisting but Brooke grabs his hand.

"It's okay." She says hastily.

"It's okay."

Cade nods, biting his bottom lip.

Brooke helps him get undressed and they shower together. They dry themselves off and Cade goes under the sink, putting on one of his absorbant boxers. Brooke kisses his cheek.

"I should probably go home tonight, can't avoid work forever, you know." She says. Cade looks sad.

"You can move in tonight, if you want." She winks.

Then he grins.

"Why waste any time, right?" She kisses him.

Cade nods and fills a backpack full of things, including his work clothes for tomorrow. They take their individual vehicles back.

They fall on Brooke's bed when they get back. Cade lays his head on Brooke's chest. She rubs his back. He relaxes into her body. He closes his eyes, letting himself relax into her, not a worry in the world, in that moment.

Brooke takes the opportunity to research some more. She Google's every thing pertaining to 'Psychological Urine Incontinence' she can think of.

It takes some digging, but she does manage to find a couple other stories that basically say the same thing. All these people who had a traumatic childhood or suffer from PTSD.

Still though, she is constantly drawn back to the story Cel sent her. She Google's the doctor. Turns out she has turned her entire line of work towards clientele with bladder disorders. Suddenly dozens of articles appear on her studies.

She sees a contact tab on the bottom of the page. She clicks on it. It brings her to a page that is blank other than an email and a phone number.

She bites her lip so hard she starts to taste blood.

She looks down at Cade, then back at the screen, then back at Cade.

She clicks the email link. She twiddles her thumbs for a while, debating. "Would Cade be upset? I guess he doesn't have to know.' She thinks.

"Hi, my name is Brooke Chance. I came across your name today and I think you may be able to help me..."

She taps as fast as her fingers will let her. She explains her situation, how similar it is to her old patient, Nicky, and another five paragraphs explaining the situation, ending with her phone number.

She doesn't let herself rethink before she presses send.

She isn't sure why her heart is pounding so fast, it's not like she is doing anything wrong.

"Who were you texting a million miles an hour?" Cade asks, making her drop her phone onto him.

"Nobody. I...thought you were asleep." That didn't sound suspicious at all.

Cade sits up.

"I was until you started tapping in my ear." He laughs.

"Sorry." She laughs awkwardly.

"Are you okay?" He leans back.

"Fine, fine. Writing, thats all."

Cade just nods.

"You've been really tired today." She adds, saying anything to change the subject.

"Catching up." He shrugs. Something tells her he doesn't just mean from the last couple nights, but, from years.

She kisses his forehead. "Let's go eat quick then we will go to bed."

Cade nods, sliding out of bed. He immedietly goes to adjust his crotch, which is bulging out.

He goes over to his bag, rummaging through the contents. He pulls out another pair of underwear and heads to the bathroom.

She goes into the kitchen and starts going through the freezer. She decides frozen pizza would be the easiest. She preheats the oven and when she turns around, Cade is peeking in from the walkway. He has lost his pants somewhere between the bedroom and the kitchen.

"Do...you..." He starts to ask then appears to get embarrassed.

"Have a plastic bag?" He finishes.

"Why?"

Cade looks down at his crotch, which is now flat and dry, he tugs at it.

"The other ones." He mumbles.

She goes under the sink, pulling out a huge wad of old grocery bags. He takes them and heads back into the hallway.

She puts the pizza on a pan and sticks it in the oven. Cade strolls back out, this time minus a shirt, with basketball shorts hung around his waist.

He sits on the barstool. Brooke walks over, wrapping her arms around his back.

"You don't need to be embarrassed." She says.

Cade is still blushing, but he falls into her embrace.

He gets over it pretty quickly, as he usually does and they eat the pizza and head for bed.

This time Cade doesn't fall asleep as easily. He starts to feel embarrassed. If he moves in, Brooke will know everything. I mean, she already does, but experience it. Every little accident, all the laundry. He likes to think she doesn't mind, but she hardly knows the extent now...

Cade lays awake thinking about it for quite a while, until Brooke wakes up, noticing his eyes are still wide open. She doesn't even talk, just silently traces her fingers around his temples, like she used to do the kids she babysat. It seems to work because he is lightly snoring two minutes later.

They both wake up early the next morning. Brooke probably doesn't need to be awake yet, but she gets up with Cade anyway.

Cade immediately bolts for the bathroom, hopping a little along the way.

She slides out from under the covers, making her way into the living room. She opens all the blinds, illuminating the cabin.

Cade walks back out and starts digging through his bag that is still on the kitchen counter. He seems flustered. He runs back to the bedroom before she can say anything, so she starts the coffee pot and sits on the couch and starts going through her phone. She ignores all the f*******: messages and texts and immedietly opens her email.

She scrolls through all the junk accumulated through the night, but there is nothing hidden between them. She tosses the phone on the seat next to her.

Cade appears emerges from the hallway, dressed in jeans a black tee shirt. She has visited him at work enough times to know he puts a red company vest on over it.

"Want some breakfast?" She stands up.

"I'm okay. I gotta go." He kisses her quickly and runs out the door.

She admits, that was a little strange, but she doesn't let herself think too much about it. So she showers and gets herself ready for work.

The spare time allows her to cradle her cup of coffee for a while and watch the morning news.

She nearly throws the cup in the air when her phone starts to ring next to her.

It's an unrecognised number, Phoenix Arizona listed as the location. Her hands start to shake as she lifts it to her ear.

"Hello?"

"Hello, is this Brooke?"

"It is..."

"Sorry, I hope I am not calling too early, this is Regina Guiness. I received your email this morning and wanted to get in contact with you right away."

"Oh, no problem."

"Listen, I would like to meet up with you and Cade."

"Oh-h, we don't live in Arizona."

There is a laugh from the other end.

"I know, sweetheart. I want to fly you out here."

"Wait, really? Why?" Brooke stands up and starts pulling at the hair on the back of her neck.

"I have been studying urinary inconsistencies for years now, I think I can help."

Brooke feels like she has forgotten how to talk.

"I um...when?"

"As soon as possible."

Brooke nods, as if she could see it through the phone. Regina must sense the tension on the other side of the line because she speaks up again.

"Three days, three two hour sessions. I think it'll do wonders. All expenses paid."

"That would be amazing, but..." She spudders.

"Under just one condition." She interrupts.

Brooke goes silent.

"I am writing a book, I would like to use your experience as part of my findings."

"I---I don't know if---"

"I can use an alius if you'd like." She interrupts again, sounding very over excited.

"I guess that would be okay."

"Brilliant! Does this weekend work? I can have you flown out Friday evening and back on a plane, ready for work Tuesday morning."

"Yeah, yes, of course."

There is a clapping sound at the other end of the line.

"Fabulous. I will email you the details and you don't hesitate to call me whenever, okay?"

"Okay, thank you so much."

Brooke hangs up the phone, awestruck.

"Phoenix." She says outloud.

It's only then she remembers she hasn't actually talked to Cade about any of this yet. What if he says no? She shakes her head. She isn't going to think like that.

Work is long that day, she sits behind her desk. Everyone leaves her alone for the most part. News travels fast in a small town. If everyone thinks she is going through a rough patch, let them think it. Not like it's not true. It must be written all over her face.

Cade beats her home that night. Must not be by much, as he is still wearing his now dirty clothes.

He greets her with a kiss on the lips.

"Hey, how was work?" She asks.

Cade shrugs. "It was work, I guess. You?"

"Same." She purses her lips, nervously.

"You okay?" Cade asks.

"Yeah, fine, fine." She heads to the bathroom, ready to strip and take a shower. Cade follows her back and does the same. She only notices when he turns around there is a couple of wet spots on his butt.

He peels the pants off. His pull up underwear are absolutely sopping, starting to drip down his legs. He slides them off quickly, wiping himself off with his shirt and shoving them into a bag.

His whole crotch and butt is covered in hives.

"Cade, oh my god.

Cade's face is so red it's a most purple.

"How long have you had that thing on?"

Cade looks away from her.

"All day."

Brooke doesn't know what to say. She takes his hand, leading him into the shower. They clean themselves off, the hot water only irritating the bumps more.

They get out and Brooke opens up a drawer. She pulls out rash cream. Cade holds his hand out but she squirts it into her own. She leans down, spreading it all over and gently messaging it in. Cade closes his eyes tightly

"Stop, stop, stop!" He moans through gritted teeth, but it isn't fast enough. He starts peeing right there on Brooke's lap. It is only for a second before he can regain control.

"I am so sorry, it's really ---" he starts panicking.

"It's okay." She takes a deep breath and then continues rubbing.

She stands up once she is done.

"Leave that to air dry for a while so it doesn't chaff." She squeezes his hand and then heads back to the shower.

Cade stands there, still embarrassed as can be. He doesn't move until she gets out of the shower.

She dresses in a tank top and panties. Then she goes into the hallway and disappears into the darkness. She comes back with a pair of underwear in her hand. She hands them to Cade, who takes them wearily.

"I wanna talk to you." She says, while he is sliding them on.

His eyes grow wide and his heart starts to race.

"About what..."

She climbs into bed, pulling the covers back and laying an arm out. Cade doesn't lay, he sits on the bed, looking at her, concerned.

She pats the bed next to her. Cade sighs and lays down next to her. She adjusts him to her liking, then starts running her fingers through his hair.

"So I know you have gone to doctors and stuff-"

Cade cuts her off.

"Brooke, yes, I have gone to every doctor in the state of Idaho." He snaps.

"No, no, I mean, have you ever gone to a therapist."

Cade pulls away from her, sitting up again.

"Like a shrink? No. Why?"

"Well...I mean...sometimes these things can be psychological."

Cade huffs out a disbelieving laugh.

"These things, as in, my accidents. No, it's not psychological."

"Don't be mad." She says, though she thinks they're beyond that point.

"You said you didn't---" He gets choked up.

"That you didn't mind." He finishes.

"I don't. I just think maybe it can help you."

Cade stands up.

"I am not crazy. I don't need to see a shrink."

"Cade, honey." She stands up too, walking toward him. His face is nothing like she expected, it's not really angry as much as hurt.

"They have met people who have gone through what you're going through. They can help."

"What do you mean they? Who is they?"

Brooke bites her lip.

"Welllllllll" she flops down on the bed.

"You already have a plan, don't you?"

Brooke smiles.

"We fly out Friday."

Cade c***s his eyebrow.

"Fly? Fly where?"

Brooke winces a little.

"Phoenix."

"Phoenix." He reiterates.

"She has seen this before. She has fixed people." She realizes she has chosen the wrong words before she even finishes saying them.

"Fix people." He says blatantly.

"That's not what I meant."

Cade actually knows that, but it doesn't stop his bottom lip from quivering.

"She specializes in people with bladder problems. I just think it would do you some good. I don't want you to be scared all the time."

Cade relents, sitting on the bed.

"It's embarrassing, Brooke. I don't like talking about it."

"I know, but for me, please."

He looks her up and down, she smiles.

"I really can't say no, can I?"

Brooke shrugs.

"You really think she can help me?"

Brooke stands on the bed, pulling him into her chest.

"If she can't, we can."

Cade smiles.

"So, Phoenix?" He says.

"Phoenix." She says.