Behind Closed Doors

Chapter1:CruelFate

I’m not sure about this, Jackson” I say nervously, wringing my satin covered hands over and over.

“Mia, what’s there to be scared about? You are my fated mate, I know it!” Jackson says. He has been trying to calm me down all day but I just have a bad feeling about tonight.

He tucks my hair behind my ear and looks deep into my eyes.

“Even if we aren’t mates, the goddess is wrong this time. I will choose you any day over a stranger.” He sounded so sincere, so sure, but it did nothing to calm my rapid heartbeat or nausea.

We pull up to the venue, a grand castle owned by one of the oldest neighboring packs. It is straight out of a fairytale but tonight it looks daunting and ominous. I nearly face plant getting out of the car, my nerves are in overdrive and I can’t shake the feeling tonight will end in misery. Because despite Jackson’s confidence, we may discover we aren’t mates. And even if we aren’t mates and still choose each other, that means we are leaving the other half of our soul behind. I’m not sure if I would be willing to give that up.

One thing werewolves know how to do is party. The ballroom is decked out to the nines. A stage and giant dance floor take up most of the room with tables all around. Elegant roses of white and red with sparkling lights wrapped around the banister line the grand staircase as we make our descent.

We dance and dine and right before the full moon, Alpha Xavier Greene, the head of the pack that owns this castle and hosts the gathering every year, makes his way to the stage. Alpha Greene is the Alpha of the Mountain Ridge pack and has done a lot for the werewolf community like helping other packs with security tech on the borders and loaning money for expansion projects. Everyone seems to love him but to me he always gave me a weird feeling. Like a greasy politician who twists partnerships into blackmail and good deeds into ammunition.

Behind him follows his Luna, Emilia, and 17 year old son, Demetri. She is adorned in an ethereal silk champagne colored high neck gown with long sleeves and flowing train. It matches perfectly to her hair color which creates the illusion of a golden statue. She looks like the goddess herself. Demetri looks handsome as well in a blue suit but you can tell he is nervous. I wonder if he has stage fright.

“Good evening everyone! Welcome to our annual fated mates ball.” Alpha Greene announces. Everyone applauds and some even give a standing ovation. Ass kissers. “Once again, we celebrate all that the moon goddess has blessed us with and hope that the other half of our souls find each other tonight. I know I would be lost completely without my Emilia.” He turns to motion to his Luna and I swear I see her flinch slightly. Was she surprised he mentioned her?

“As is tradition, let us make our way outside to see who the moon goddess has bestowed her great gift on this year. Go discover your mate!” Almost immediately chairs screech and drinks clink as they are set back on tables, some girls even are near running to the doors. Jackson takes my hand and we slowly make our way to the exit. My heart is thumping in my chest erratically knowing that no matter what happens, our relationship will be altered completely in a matter of minutes.

The courtyard is adorned with fairy lights and another dance floor so the celebration can continue after mate pairings are discovered. New mates will be swept up in emotion and stare lovingly into each others eyes, while the ones forgotten by the moon goddess this year can drown their sadness with booze and cheap hookups.

We walk past it into the forest edge and count down the minutes until midnight. Each second passes like walking through quicksand. Jackson takes my hands and turns so we are looking straight into each other's eyes. We count the last 5 seconds together.

“5…4…3…2…1.” We say together. But nothing happens. No spark, no bond, no change. No mate. You can see the disappointment and utter heartbreak in our eyes. At least just for a few seconds before Jackson starts sniffing wildly and looking nearly feral. Letting go of my hands and turning left and right frantically, desperately searching for something or someone.

I don’t need to ask what is happening. Everyone knows that when you are near your mate under the full moon their scent becomes intoxicating and the drive to find them brings out your wolf’s instincts.

As I back away, I see someone run and collide with Jackson. He holds her tight, lifting her up and buries his head into her neck, his face covered by ringlets of blonde hair. He breathes her in like it’s his last breath. She is gorgeous. And I am forgotten.

So I run. I shift into my wolf mid stride and I keep running. I hear my name being called but I do not turn. I run all the way back to my packhouse. I shift back and I don’t care that I am naked. My mind is completely devoid of any thought, in shock and in pain. I stagger up to the 2nd floor that is reserved for the beta family, I am like a robot just moving to my bedroom. Thankfully my parents are still at the party and my little sister is asleep. She is 17 so she’ll come to the ball next year. I just hope that she won’t feel the same excruciating pain that I do right now. I crawl in my bed and under the covers. My phone buzzes and lights up for the next hour as I stare mindlessly at the ceiling. Whether it is my parents or Jackson, I can deal with it tomorrow. Tonight, I protect my heart and my head by avoiding the pain instead.