Once Upon A Wishful Ending

Flashback

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This episode is a true diary entry. There is graphic information included, read at your own risk. Mention of s****l assult.

Trigger warning - self harm, depression and anxiety.

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Recap

'ARE YOU ALRIGHT IN THERE!' My brother screamed through the door. All of a sudden a wave of weakness came over me and I could reply. I could hear what I think was my brother breaking down the door and then...

Darkness...

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Flashback....

It was the 7th of January 2015, 1:32am and I was awoken by the heavy sound of footsteps getting closer and closer to my room. I opened my eyes just a c***k to see who it was. My heart stopped for a second to see an all to familiar face walking towards my bed. His face gives me too many nightmares now. My father.

He almost stalked towards my bed looking at me with some sort of lust in his eyes. I remembered I was wearing shorts and a strappy top to bed which I now fully regret.

He came to the edge of my bed and pulled the covers off me, I tried not to flinch as I felt the bed dip as he lay down facing me. I squeezed my eyes shut hoping it would go away, but it didn't. I could feel his cold hands on my stomach as he lifted the hem of my t-shirt, I was frozen, I didn't do anything, I couldn'tdoanything.

He lifted my t-shirt up and over my head and throw it onto the floor. I felt the cold air hit my bare chest. I want to move but I was to scared of what he would do. His hands slowly making there way down my chest, over my boobs squeezing them and pinching my n*****s and then made it to the top of my shorts. He slowly pulled them down over my ankles and throw them on the floor with my top. I felt so exposed but so scared to cover myself in fear of what he would do.

Then he came back up to the top of my underwear, his hand slipped down and I could feel his cold fingers touching me. I tried to move but this gave him the opportunity to stick a figure into me. It hurt so much. I felt so dirty. He then wrapped my underwear off and throw them somewhere. I tried to move but I was now frozen with shock again, how ever this isn't the first time this has happened. He proceeded to add fingers and please himself using me.

I couldn't move, my heart rate speeding my and my anxiety started to kick in, I tried now not to move but that didn't work. His hands were roaming my body and I hated it. He slowly made his way down and opened my legs wider. His hand touched my inner thigh and sent bad shivers down my back, I tried to shut my legs but he was too strong. I began to panic. His head now made contact with, down there, and I could feel his tongue enter me and slowly start to lick and bite a bit. I felt so dirty and horrid right now.

Before I new it he had inserted two fingers in me again going in and out getting faster and faster. I want it to stop, why can't it stop. He entered another figure and continued. I didn't dare to make a sound as the fourth fingers was enter. It hurt so so much.

I'm 14 why is this happening to me? God what did I do wrong? I cracked my eyes open to see him remove his hand and make his way to my boobs. He slowly started to touch them, making circles with his thumbs, then slowly start to bite one of them and move his tongue around the n****e, then move to the other.

While playing with my boobs he started to unfasten his jeans and pulled then down. I remember thing 'God no please'. I was frozen I couldn't move. He lined himself up with my entrance and as he trusted he bit down on my n****e really hard. I wanted him to stop, I couldn't make him stop..

Once he was close to finishing he cummed all over me and then started fingerings me again only this time was touching my arse too. I really wanted to stop him, why couldn't I.

Once he got bored he carelessly put my t-shirt and shorts back on but didn't put my underwear back on as he had destroyed them and left them on the floor, I felt horrid. I felt dirty. Why didn't I stop him? I should have opened my eyes. I could have screamed. Why didn't I? Why? Once he left I pulled the covers up to my chest but everything burnt or stung. I tried to ignore it as I curled up into a ball. I started to cry, I cried harder and harder as I remembered what had just happened. Why God? Was the only question I remember thinking.