“Sam, I can’t drive home. My dad will kick my ass if he’ll know I’m driving while I’m drunk. Can you come and pick me up?” Jesus, he’s such an i***t! Why I even bother answering his call? I broke up with him because he’s an i***t, a cheater, and an egotistical jerk. “Call your friend Ty or your girlfriend to drive you home. I’m in bed already and ready to sleep.” I emphasize the girlfriend, who he cheated on me a year ago. “Sam, please. You know we’re not like that anymore. My friends are already drunk.” Of course, they’re all drunk. “Ugh! Send me the address. You won’t call me next time, Tyler. I’m not your DD.” “Thanks, Sam, I owe you.” Owe you my ass. “Be there. Bye.” I get up in bed and change my clothes. I’m in front of the Frat house after twenty minutes. The music is still b

