Dear, Ex-Husband

Even the Remains Still Hurt

Alana's POV

I sat in silence, waiting for Dave. The room felt suffocating, like it was slowly pulling the life out of me. My fingers trembled, colder than usual. I kept exhaling softly, over and over. This isn’t the end, Alana. This is the beginning, a new chapter waiting to be lived.

Dave arrived, wearing his favorite blue shirt. His hair was barely styled, but it did nothing to dull his handsome face. His eyes didn’t shine the way they usually did. There was a fog there, like he was trying to hold back something heavy. Was he hurting too?

He took the seat beside me, and our eyes met for a brief second. Those same eyes that had stared into mine so deeply the night before. Eyes darkened with desire, filled with need. But this morning, we were strangers again. No words. No greetings. Just silence.

The judge came in. He offered a few brief words and asked if we were sure. Neither of us replied. I turned away from the stack of documents on the table. Just looking at them hurt. Those papers would set me free from someone who was never truly mine, yet someone I always waited for.

My hand trembled as the pen was passed to me. I inhaled deeply, trying to calm my nerves, and let it out slowly.

I signed the papers that ended a story that had never truly begun. My heart tore in silence.

Dave picked up the same pen. He looked calm, but his eyes gave him away. There was pain there. He signed.

Today, we were officially divorced. Today, there would be no more wedding anniversaries I celebrated alone. No more quiet breakfasts. No more feeling like a stranger in my own home. No more Dave—his touch, his kisses, those intense eyes that once looked through me.

I stepped outside. Dave was already there with Kelly. The three of us shared a glance. Kelly’s gaze was blank, but there was sadness in it. And when I looked at Dave, his stare held me longer. So many words pressed against my lips, but none of them came out. For the first time, I saw his eyes glisten, and a tear fell. He wiped it quickly.

I forced a smile.

Kelly pulled me into an embrace. A sudden wave of tears I hadn’t expected burst between us . I gently wiped her cheeks.

“Take good care of Dave. I hope you both find happiness.”

“I’m sorry, Alana. For everything I put you through. I truly hope you find your own joy. And please… don’t disappear. One day, Dave might need you.” Her grip on my hands tightened, more than it ever had.

Of all the years we spent as friends, I had never seen her beg like that. She didn’t want me to vanish completely, but I no longer had a reason to stay.

“We can still stay in touch, Kelly. Be happy with him.” I cupped her cheeks, smiling through the tears that wouldn’t stop falling. The contrast between us felt unreal.

I glanced one last time at Dave. He stood frozen, broken. This was the first time I’d seen him cry. He didn’t say much. Only one sentence left his lips.

“Alana, I’m sorry for everything… and thank you for all the memories.”

I gave a faint nod, speechless. From the depth of my heart, I hoped he would never hurt Kelly the way he had hurt me.

I walked away, leaving behind the two of them, frozen in place. I left behind my old life. Left behind the story that had once felt like home.

My hand gently rested on my belly. Fourteen days after we’d been together, I’d taken a pregnancy test. And it was positive.

I walked away carrying Dave’s love inside me. A piece of him that would always stay with me, always remind me of everything we once were.

Goodbye to all the memories. Goodbye, Dave and Kelly. I’m sorry, but I choose to walk away. I choose to leave, not to return. I will live my life with my child, and I will no longer reopen the chapters of the past. I’ve had enough of a life woven with pain.

I will become a new Alana. Over the past three years, I’ve saved enough. It’s enough to build a new life with my baby. I will do my best to bring happiness into their world. I will find my own joy, with my child by my side. I am Alana, strong, no longer fragile or powerless. God will always be with me and my child.

There will be nights I may cry, and there may be mornings that offer me no laughter. I’ve been broken once—I won’t let myself shatter again. This time, I’ll rise differently. Not to show anyone I’m strong. But to remind myself that I am worthy. That I deserve a better life. That I, too, deserve a corner of the world willing to welcome me.

Perhaps I was never meant to stay in this city. Perhaps I was never destined to remain in a house that holds too many wounds and too few truths. I will find my own way. I will raise my child with a love that never runs out—a love that asks for nothing in return, a love that never has to beg to be seen.

I will keep moving forward. I have no room to surrender. I won’t stop not for the small stumbles, not even for the storms that come to knock me down. I will do everything I can for my child.

A mother will always strive to be strong for her child. She may never ask for justice for herself, but she will never stop fighting for her child.

This is not the end.

This... is my becoming.

This is the beginning of a journey that will change my life forever.