Devil's Sanity

ZION

Everything seems dark yet i can see from a distance and with the doors gone i can’t tell where i stand in this three dimensional area.

Am i on the the surface. Am i floating above it or better yet am i under the surface? There is no way to know for sure is there ?

“Are you still here?” i questioned. The place was feeling empty and i needed to hear her voice to be assured. Being alone for too long causes problems, after all.

“ i am .” she answered. I let out a sigh of relief. Many may say that they prefer to be alone but in time you will go mad. You don’t need to talk or interact with someone, you just need a indication that some living thing is there. Feel there warmth or to hear there voice, for many it helps to be able to see there physical body.

 “ … who are you… what are you” i asked. Forgetting that this was a dream for the moment i felt that i needed to know more about her.

“ i do not understand” she replied. Did she not understand my question or perhaps she didn’t know how to answer it.

“What is your name” i asked. I decided to keep the questions as forward as possible no questions that can be over thinked.

“ i do not have a name” she replied. She seemed quicker to answer this time.

“ where am i ?” i asked. I had hoped a actual answer or at least one i could understand. With each question my head hanged only further. I needed… no, i wanted answers. I wanted to get to know her more.

“ you are here with me.” she answered. Another blank, questions seem to be… well i don’t know what really maybe i was asking the wrong questions. Or maybe this voice was cautious of me, i can’t be sure really. Just one last one then…

“How are you feeling” i continued in a final effort. But my expectations for this answer will be like everything else in my life so far…

“ i have none” she answered. Funny how her reply fits into the blank about the amount of expectations i have. If one wants to not be disappointed then one should expect nothing.

Im done asking questions, guess it was a waste. I took a step forward.

“Where are you going ?” the voice interrupted oddly enough i didn’t think she would start talking for herself. 

“ im just going to look around” i answered.

“ i would like the answers to some of the personal questions you asked of me, but about you” 

It striked me as odd that this voice wanted to know about me in return, and it didn’t seem hard to do except the more i thought about it the more i realize that i can’t remember. I woke up here feeling as clueless as she was i suppose were currently in the same boat…

“ i can’t seem to remember” i answered.

“ is this what they call holding a grudge?” she questioned

“It would be if i was lying but in this case...no.” i answered

“ how are you feeling?” she continued.

“ stressed...i was hoping to get to know you but you don’t seem to know yourself, nor i.”

“Does this have something to do with the phrase, being in the same boat? What does it mean?”

“ in a way, yes, it's a expression that refers to two people in the same situation, such as how we don’t know who we are at the moment”

“ is that why you mentioned that phrase”

I was going to reply with “yes” but then it i hit me that i never said the phrase out loud, i was only thinking it, yet somehow she heard it, but how?

“ how did you hear about that phrase? I certainly don’t recall speaking it.” i uttered in question… silence to place as awaited for a answer or perhaps a blank as i’ve been getting this whole time…

“I have what you call an ability” she replied.

“ it allows me to connect with the souls and minds of both living and non-living things.” she continued. What i assume she meant was that she could understand both the thoughts and feelings of living things, however what that means for non-living things i'm not quite sure. Perhaps she meant that she could communicate with the souls of the damned. If she can connect with my mind does that mean she can see my memories?

“ hey… listen, i haven’t been able to recall my memory since i got here. Do you think,,, you could use your ability to help me sort out my memories from the last 24 hours ?” i requested...a long silence took place. I thought is she capable of thinking things out? Did she once have a body? What happen to it? I couldn’t help to wonder if there was more to her then just her voice that echoed in the distance.

“ would i get back anything in return ?” 

“ that depends. What do you want?”

“Would you become my host ?”

“ like a parasite thing ?”

“No, not exactly…”

I thought about her trade off for a moment parasites use host as a kind of life line until they die but if she doesn’t want to use me like that i don’t think im in any other danger.

“ i suppose so” i replied in agreement. I don’t know what lies ahead but to some extent i look forward to it i am tired of standing around in this dark void.

“ so how do we began” i spoke out… i kind of assumed it would be something like images of my memory being projected… but strangely the experience would be more wordy then what i hoped for…

“ if you would like a visiual of this process, might i suggest closing your eyes” the voice spoke. As i took her advice to heart. It was starting to come to me, but in the form of words and quotes rather then images..

“ hmm.. Yea, it’s coming to me now” i spoke…

“ im glad to have been of help” the voice spoke… the words were starting to fade but at the last minute i stopped her

“ hold it, im not getting anything for my name” i spoke...my eyes still closed trying not to lose sight of the visuals

“ i did not think one such as yourslef would be missing a name among these memories… very well, i shall see what i can do…” she infomed. Soon names started to come up, and honestly a lot of them made me kind of upset, the fact that i would be called these things…

Big C, curtis pain, curtis blow?! Citrus didn’t sound so bad though

“ what...the...actul...FUCK?!” was my reaction to these rediculause names… after scaping these many stupid name’s i was able to confirm that my last name was definatly “Rhodes” figuring out my first was kinda diffcult there was 4 choices: zumoki, kurtis, zay, and katisu

Process of elimanation time… zay sounds pretty meaning less seeing that i can’t recall that name ever being used… zumoki sounded like something from a anime, yet i kinda liked that name better save it for some one else. Curtis and katisu… my memory was telling me for sure that these names ment the same thing, and it was obvious as to which was the right choose but, and this sound cringy… being the weeb i am…

“Hmm, im gonna settle with katisu” i spoke making my final decision.

“Settle ? is this not your name? Have i failed you?” the voice spoke she almost sounded defensive about the situation…

“ no, i know what my real name is, im just settling on using this translation instead, its the same thing, just… diffrent” i spoke to the voice hopefully this would giver her reassurence in her task..

Yet there was still something gnawing at me. something missing, something that would probably explain the change in skin color to my sides. a black but smooth texture. All the same though, it wasn’t quite worth popping a blood vessel over.

The silence lasted forquite a while. And then as if looking her in the eye i tilt my head upward.

“ d-did you ever have a physical body?” i spoke trying to continue a conversation, it was comforting talking to her.

“ i have physical properties...but it requires something. Something i do not have that most living things do” she answered. If she still has these physical properties then where could they be surely it's not too far from her.

“Will you take me these physical propertes” i requested

“ why of course” she responded without hesitation, could it be that she had been hoping that i’d ask such a thing or perhaps it was more complex then that.

She began to guide me threw the dark void , i felt cautious as to try and watch my step in this place. Sooner or later though, i ended up stepping into a new secion of the void all togather, the place finally seemed to have area, mass and dimensions. She never told me to stop, but then again i never stopped to ask what next at this point i was eploring of my own will again. The area seemed like a island surrounded by a pound of water.

Only when i step in this “pound “ do i realize that im bear footed, it startled me just a little, i try to take it slow, try not to lose my balance or to not step on any rocks too hard… but the base is flat and the “water” doesn’t go any higher the my ankles it was basically like walking in a shallow pool of water. I soon resurfaced on this small island, which is kinda exaggerating since the only thing that was submerged were my feet.

There was one tree here, and it wasn’t you typical hawaii tree either, the bark was black the tree tall and with out any leaves and  just under it a small puddle of… well who knows really

“ the puddle you see before you...is my core” she spoke her voice resurfacing. So what like her soul or something? I guess that's kinda neat

“ i want you to drink it” she spoke. Now that, not so neat. I was having trouble processing or rather attempting her request. Its dark and not clear so it couldn’t be something as simple as water

“ if i do what will it taste like” i poked her with my question. I wanted to be prepared, if i just gulped it down and it tasted like ass, i’d end up wanting to throw it up and it might even come up as rude…

“ whatever you want it to” she spoke. So either she was unwilling to tell me or she didn’t know herself, probably the second one…

I cupped some of the...i wanna say water i guess. I could do it i just needed to block my feelings about it just for a second . hesitant at gulped down … only to realize…

“..oh.. Its… water” i spoke i helped myself to some more. It was clean and cold, no minerals or dirty rocks just clean cold water. Dripping down my face it was actually kinda refreshing.

As i was feeling a since of relief in my chest a reaction was occurring to the surrounding area. Symbols that decorate the surrounding area highlighted in constant changing colors. The symbols looked familiar yet i could not place as to where…

The pond surrounding  the area began to empty and the puddle i has recently drunk from began to take shape. It was a female body, dark yet erotic, and even further seemingly lacking detail as if it was some doll or a unfinished  sculpture. Her head was tilted down her body lowered and planted on the ground, just when everything seemed calm, the female body suddenly jumped at me...i didn’t have any words on the matter this was the voice i was talking to a while ago right…

Surely she must have been excited right, she did sound offly happy to just guide me here after all. Her eyes were pitch black like something from  horror movie, lacking both iris or pupils. Her body seemingly solid but naked seemed to still be dripping the water like substance. One drop dripped into my right eye and forced me to close it for a moment, probably no harm with water getting into my eye. Her body seemed to be dripping water all over the placee and yet my clothes remained dry.

Her eyes blinked gaining a iris color of what seemed to be rainbow but soon slowly altered colors until they remained a color of purple but still  no pupils

She began to explore my body reaching into my shirt hopfully she doesn’t go below the belt, as she did a search on me i did a little exploring on her myself . touching her face it was smooth and soft as i attempted to sit up i had acceditally grabbed what i belive would repersent a womens breast although in truth she didn’t seem to mind let alone notice, this wasn’t something new, ive touched boobs before, so much so that it wasn’t all that exciting to me anymore…

“ hey… this form, why did you  choose this one surely you could have picked something you liked” i spoke there was no way that this was her true form, it lacked to much detail…

“ i have simply chosed a form most desirable to you” she spoke. Most desirable huh? Sounds like she found the hentai section of my brain… wait is she still hooked up to my brain from that time i asked her to help with my memories?

“ you mentioned being in a dream. Would you explain the concept of a dream to me?” she spoke…

“ i dream… is easily defined as a state of being when one is asleep. In a dream one can live out any fantasy. Unfortunately those fantasies aren’t alway pleasant…” i eplained, there was no actul way to explain it i greater detail then that, for not even men have come to understand the true purpose of a dream.

“ i see… strangly enough this place is not that of which you call a dream” she spoke… alright she is definatly still hooked up to my subconcoius ..

“ this place is much rather connected between the physical and spiritual world… we can interact only like this when you are sleeping in the room with the iron door” she spoke meaning that sleeping anywhere else would not cause this effect… and between worlds? Does she mean like that thing in bleach with the cleaner?

“ well how do i get back then… ive lost track of time and if im gone to long i could die from a lack of food” i asked. I honestly should get back soon before they thing about putting me in a coffin

“ well if  you got here threw a state of sleep i don’t see why you can’t get back with the same method” she spoke she sat up patting her lap as if offering it as a pillow

“ you could sleep here” she spoke, confirming my strange suspcions. I was hesatent of the offer mainly cuz it was some kind of anime trope… i laid my head down on her lap…

“ oh wait… what do i call you” i asked at some point i would need a name to refer to her by…

“ that is up to you i suppose…” she spoke

“ hmmm. Zion then” i spoke i once liked to draw this made up race that i called zion and strangely she looked very similar to that race

“ sounds good” she spoke smiling at me… i soon went to sleep i wanted to say good night zion, but for some reason, my heart just wasn’t in it…

I soon woke up at last… my room was cold and solid as i sat up the child from before was resting his head on me...come to think of it he didn’t seem to have a name either…

“ hmm… i wounder what will i name you” i spoke…

Meanwhile back in the void…

“ till we meet again… katisu” zion spoke...