Love Squared to the Second Power

Chapter Four

Chapter Four

Getting to Know Each Other

Monday came and he didn't show up to court. He was apparently still in the hospital, so the Judge adjourned the hearing. I was stuck married to the son of a b***h for a few more weeks. I guess I had no choice but to move on. I couldn’t help but feel like there was some hidden agenda. I don't know why I felt that way, but it was just a gut feeling.

Jayson asked me out to dinner shortly before the hearing. We thought it was going to be a celebratory dinner, but we were wrong since the divorce was prolonged. We were enjoying the night, laughing, dancing and drinking wine. We had this connection that I couldn’t explain. He made me feel as if I was able to fly. When we touched it felt like electricity was flowing between us. On the drive back to my house he asked if I would like to go sailing the next day. Sailing was something I loved but had not done in a very long time, so I happily said yes. He walked me to my door and kissed me good night.

The next day he picked me up around ten in the morning and we headed out to the lake. We were singing along to the radio and enjoying the beautiful scenery. When we got to the lake he opened my door, took my hand and led me to the dock. The boat was the same one I helped him restore over two years ago. I commended him on his restore job and he said, “I cannot believe you remembered”. I couldn’t help but remember we had such a great time doing it.

We were on the lake for hours with the wind whipping through our hair. Jayson had long blond hair. He sorts of looked like a hippy; he acted like one too. He was a unique person and always had a positive outlook. He was an old soul and had a hard time fitting in with the ideals of today. He had a huge phobia about committing to anything. He always talked about how impossible it was to believe in the constitution of marriage and so much about the world either vexed or baffled him. He was a different breed entirely. He always talked about how he never wanted to be a father because the responsibility was so great, and he didn't want it.

I could never understand it because he was in med school. How could being a father be more of a responsibility than being responsible for another person's life. It seemed much like the same aspects to me, both you have to keep alive, care for, keep them safe while they are under your care, prepare them for future events and console them through rough times. He said it was different because you're forever responsible for a child and that responsibility was twenty-four hours a day seven days a week. I never fought it because we were just having fun. I couldn't imagine we would ever be serious.

The next week Jayden asked if I would like to go flying. He and I restored an old prop plane when we were kids. He had his pilot's license for a few years and took it out every chance he could. I told him one day we could fly together. I never expected to ever live up to it. I was afraid of heights so trusting him not to kill us was a big deal for me. when we were gliding through the sky, he made me feel safe. I felt like as long as I was with him nothing would ever hurt me.

On the drive home he thanked me for going up with him. I laughed and said it wasn't bad and I was still alive. He chuckled and said that it was great seeing me laugh. He looked at me with those beautiful brown eyes and said that I didn't laugh enough anymore. That he missed the old Maleaha the one so full of life and couldn't hold still. Then he asked if everything was okay. I explained that I just wanted to be free of Raymond that my marriage to him had me questioning everything in life.

We pulled into my drive, he looked at me and said “never question anything about yourself Maleaha you’re a very intelligent and beautiful woman who just happened to fall for the wrong person” when we got to my door he leaned in and kissed me. It was like my body was full of waves crashing against one another. I couldn't explain it any other way except I felt like what I would imagine an ocean to feel like as a being.

I walked to my room and collapsed on my bed. Wondering what the hell was going on in my life and who I was becoming. I was for all intents and purposes in a relationship with two different men. I truly did not recognize myself anymore. I was definitely in a completely different place in life then I ever intended on being.

I also was very thankful for running into these two guys. They were bringing a lot of joy to my life and relieving a lot of stress. It was a much-needed distraction especially with the whole issues I had with Raymond.