god father obsession

hot and cold

Chapter Nine: hot and cold

I barely slept.

Every time I closed my eyes, I saw him.

Felt him.

His mouth. His hands. The way his body pressed into mine, hot and urgent. The way he kissed me like I was something he needed. The way he left me trembling… and aching.

Then, just like that, he pulled away—like it meant nothing.

I woke up cold.

Empty.

Downstairs, he was already waiting. Leaning against the sleek black car in a fitted shirt, dark slacks, and a face carved from stone. His sunglasses hid his eyes, but not the tension in his body. He didn’t speak—just nodded at the passenger side.

“You’re riding with me.”

I obeyed, slipping into the seat beside him. The air in the car was heavy—thick with tension and everything left unsaid. I wanted to speak, to ask what last night meant. But the words stuck in my throat.

He said nothing.

Just drove.

I studied him quietly—the way his fingers gripped the steering wheel, the tight line of his jaw, the way his thumb tapped once against the leather. He was bothered. I could feel it in every inch of his silence.

But not in the way I needed.

“You don’t have to drop me,” I said finally, my voice too soft.

“I’m heading that way,” he replied, eyes fixed on the road. “Hospital’s a few streets down.”

Right. Of course.

Convenient.

He was back to being cold. Controlled. Like last night hadn’t happened.

“I guess it’s easy to pretend, huh?” I murmured, not looking at him.

His jaw tensed, but he didn’t respond.

“Is this how it’s going to be now?” I pushed, voice rising. “You act like I mean something one second, then nothing the next?”

He pulled the car over sharply in front of the school gate. His knuckles turned white around the wheel.

“You don’t get it,” he said lowly.

“No, I don’t,” I snapped. “So help me understand.”

He finally turned to me—his gaze burning, intense, restrained. A storm barely contained.

“You make me forget who I’m supposed to be,” he said. “You… make me want things I shouldn’t want.”

My breath caught.

His voice was rough, but his body stayed distant. Controlled. Like he hated himself for last night. Like touching me again might break him completely.

“You need to focus on school,” he said, turning away. “New people. New environment. No distractions.”

“I’m a distraction now?” I whispered.

He didn’t answer.

“Just go. You’re late.”

I stepped out slowly, heart sinking as he drove off without another word.

He hadn’t even waited for the gate to close behind me.

—

Everything inside the school felt strange. Too clean. Too quiet. Too unfamiliar. They gave me a welcome packet with my class schedule, ID card, locker key—all the things that should’ve mattered.

But my thoughts stayed with him.

I wandered the hallways like a ghost. Names and faces blurred together. People smiled at me, teachers introduced themselves, a few girls tried to chat—but I wasn’t really there.

Not when his voice still echoed in my ears.

You make me forget who I’m supposed to be.

At lunch, I sat under a tree outside, untouched food on my lap, my phone in my hand. I scrolled through nothing. Refreshed the same screen again and again. Waiting for a message that wouldn’t come.

A shadow passed near my bench.

A guy I hadn’t seen before—dark curls, hoodie slung low over his brow—glanced my way twice. I didn’t smile. Didn’t speak. I wasn’t in the mood for anything… or anyone.

Xavier had kissed me like he couldn’t live without me.

Now he was gone.

And the worst part?

I would’ve let him ruin me all over again.