She Took A Risk That Changed Her Life Forever

Chapter 1

I think I’m done with men. Dating was never my calling; maybe there’s something wrong with me because my relationships never lasted longer than a year. So I give up and I’m never catching feelings ever again. (Sigh!) I know I’m not perfect, but when I love, I love deeply. I trust too much and I make sure that I’ll never hurt someone I love deeply intentionally; that’s how I am.

I wish I could find someone who’d love me more than I love him, because it’s certainly better for a man to be more in love than a woman, with the thought that a large number of men have difficulty being sexually loyal to one woman. His deep emotional involvement would aid in the strength of the relationship; that’s my belief. I’ve loved too much, but all I got in return was heartbreak, disappointment, and betrayal. So I’m not risking it again; my heart can’t take it anymore. God, let your will be done, because I don’t care anymore.

I'm saying this because I’ve been ghosted and he stood me up. Well, to be honest, I’m kind of hurt and disappointed. Okay, sharp; I am the one who made a move on this guy, and he didn’t expect that from me. But at least he could’ve just told me that he’s not interested. I mean, I knew it was either he'd give me a chance or he'd reject me. Last week Sunday, we were supposed to go on a picnic date. Well, I suggested it, he agreed, and I asked what I should cover since I’m the one who came up with the idea. Honestly, I didn’t expect him to cover everything, but he was like, “No, don’t worry, I’ll cover everything.” Oh! Then I was like, “Okay, if you insist.” Then I waited the whole day for him; he didn’t show up and he didn’t even call. Even now, I’m expecting his text, but nothing; he didn’t even reply to my yesterday text. He stood me up and ghosted me!

Anyway, let me work and stop stressing over a man. After all, that’s all I have, my job; it keeps me going, and yeah, also alcohol. There were ambulances that arrived yesterday, so I have to call a few spares to get prices for the parts that need to be replaced on them and make quotations so that I can email them to our fleet provider. However, when the quotations are less than 10000, we make them via phone call with one of the consultants, and hey, they can be hectic sometimes! They ask you unnecessary things like they know how to fix cars; they really annoy me. Last time I called, that lady asked me why we can’t find aftermarket auto spares where we’ll find cheap brakes for the SAPS vehicles. I mean, why on earth would I want to buy cheap parts for a car? Let alone for SAPS cars? I mean, we all know police driving is bad! So I can’t risk buying cheap parts for SAPS cars.

So I am a receptionist/administrator at an automotive workshop around Capetown, which falls under Krugersdorp. Well, I take it as if it falls under Kimberly because it’s actually walking distance from home. Working here isn’t bad at all, plus I’m the only woman who works here, so there’s no drama. We all know where there are women, there’s always drama and competition over weaves, dress codes, expensive clothes, boyfriends, and s**t. So it’s just me alone here. Sometimes I do dress up and wear makeup, then some other days I just look horrible and I don’t care; that’s because I’m not competing with anyone. I guess that’s the advantage of working with men. In fact, it is so nice until one asks me to pretend as if I’m his girlfriend so I can tell his actual girlfriend/side chick to leave him alone. LOL, imagine!

If my dad didn't force me to study teaching, I would’ve been a qualified chef by now. I wanted to go to a culinary school after matrix's because I’ve always loved cooking; it’s my passion. But Dad forced me to study that course I don’t like, and I even dropped out. Then he decided to stop paying my fees. Even when I told him I wanted to be a chef, he said I wasted so much of his money, so I’ll see what I’d do with my life.

Then I started looking for a job. First, I started being a field sales agent at an insurance company. I worked for about 6 months; it wasn’t easy, but I told myself that I’m gaining experience and life. We traveled all over the provinces, and that was the only advantage; I know most of the places in South Africa because of that job. Then, after being a sales agent, I got a Business Office Administration learner's program for 3 months at Vee Park in Vaal, my hometown, actually; I was born and bred there in Pretoria. After that, I was working as an enumerator and data capturer in the Miguel City district in the West Rand, where I’m currently staying with my aunt and her family.

Then last year, I got this position I’m currently in right now. I’m just grateful that I can now have a stable job so I can take care of myself and my family back home. The salary is not enough, but at least I can buy myself monthly cosmetics, clothes, and everything that I need, actually, and contribute to groceries. But I’m still applying for another job that will have benefits; I also want to own a house and a car like any other kid.

At least today I had someone to chat with after making the quotations. There was a lady who came to service her car, so she waited for it. She’s a talker like me; she was complaining about her boyfriend, saying that he likes borrowing her car, then when it’s broken, he doesn’t even bother helping her with the costs of fixing it. She swore that she won’t borrow it to him ever again. When I buy a car, I don’t think I’ll borrow my man a car. What if he’ll be transporting girls with my car? Yay, never! We all know men are s**t. 17:00 PM, yay, time is up! I'm clearing my desk, preparing to go home and cook dinner, because during the week, I’m the one who’s cooking.

Home finally! Today I’m in a good mood; I’ll cook my little brother’s favorite meal, Mac and Cheese. Well, he’s my cousin, my aunt’s last born, Junior. I take them as my siblings because we grew up together. My aunt has three boys: Trust (32), Noah (23), then Junior (20). Then Mom has three girls: Kelly (39), Lerato (26), and Rea (20).

I feel like my life is boring, you know? My daily routine: I wake up in the morning, bath, and go to work. I do the usual, then when I knock off, I go straight home, cook dinner, and watch my favorite series. Then at 9 PM, I go to bed and read novels for about 30 minutes to an hour. I check my w******p texts, check some updates on f*******:, and sleep. No goodnight text, no phone call from someone's son. That's how my life is every day. The only difference is that on Fridays and Saturdays, my aunt cooks, so it's time for me to rest from the pots.