Forgive Me My Lord

Chapter 7: The mistake in AllenTown (Nanimi’s POV)

Chapter 7

The Mistake in Allentown

(Nanimi’s POV)

******WARNING******

This Chapter contains possible triggers to some audience, this chapter included: Child abuse, domestic violence, and cursing.

I stood still on a branch, hidden in the leaves watching from afar as My young Lord and his family left the Hospital. I followed them home and watched as they settled in, I’ve been watching over him since that first night, he’s officially 3 weeks old, i was surprised they didn’t bring him home after just a few days but than i found out it was because Lord Yatos immune system isn’t working properly so says the doctors. In all honesty, there’s nothing wrong with the child at all, his body is just feeling the results of his memories loss and all this power that is dormant, it will fade when he comes back to the Yokai Realm, that’s where are souls feel replenished and full. Unfortunately when we are away from home for so long we start feeling a constant drainage and more prone to sickness but its not lethal for us unlike humans, Lord Yato will be fine, i just wish i could just speed up time and take him now but I can’t.

I remember over hearing one of my brothers war meetings and they were disgusing Lord Yatos safety, if we were ever in a situation where Lord Yato is born without his gifts he will remain in the human realm until the Halos try to make a move. Simply because recently the Halos have paid more attention to the fight other than replenishing their power so the human realm isn’t under constant attack unlike the Yokai Realms right now. Thankfully with that information i knew what i have to do, even if its just keeping watch from afar.

At nightfall I stood next to the downstairs window and peeked into the house. There was a tall man playing with what i assumed was Lord Yatos human brother Seth he couldn’t be more than 2-3 years older than my Lord, the father always seemed much more fawned of this child, he only holds Lord Yato when the women with black hair hands the child to him. Sometimes it seems he doesn’t like the infant at all, the way he looks at the child irritates me sometimes, I’ve certainly taken a disliking to the man rather quickly.

On the other hand, speaking of the women with black hair, she came down the stairs with a sweet smile as she held a sleepy baby close to her chest. The other child ran up to his mother and started tugging at her arm, her reaction was so motherly, she smiled at the cheeky boy and held his hand asking if he wanted to help her make dinner, the boys eyes light up but as he was shaking his head yes his father picked the boy up onto his arm and said, “ Nah, me and my boy are going to go to the store and get some Bud Light and Root Beer”, he said with a small grin as the boy squirmed giggling. The Women shook her head and wished them a quick and safe return home, i watched as him and the boy left.

The women went into the next room, as if to follow i went to the next window i saw and she was in the kitchen making a baby bottle and as she skillfully made her way around the kitchen to prepare dinner while not disturbing the sleeping child. Up until the father and child showed up closing the door too loudly causing the sweet baby start to softly sob in his mothers arm, she looked down to the baby with a loving look in her eyes, she kissed the child’s head and started singing to him, her voice was quite beautiful. As i watched I couldn’t help but wish i had that tenderness growing up, being raised as a noble was quite lonely, being the heads of the family meant being fairly absent parents, sometimes my brother and i went days even weeks without seeing our parents, when they died it was a bitter ceremony for myself but i felt their death was much harder on Usuei, once they were pronounced dead he was forced into being the Head of the Family years before it was supposed to happen.

I watched and I watched, i could never interfere unless his life were at stake. I was there for him always, he just didn’t know. I was there when he kept getting sent to the hospital because they always thought there was something wrong with him. I was there when he sat at the door listening to his parents fight, I couldn’t do anything, sometimes I’ve tried to comfort him from afar by making things fall in his room to distract him.

I’ve learned enough about humans to know that this isn’t a normal one, this is a very angry home. The father always chooses Seth over Lord Yato, always plays with him, helps him with his studies, takes him places while he always acted as if the other child never existed and when he does interact with him its with disrespect and criticism. I had a strong distaste for that human, he always started ridiculous arguments with his partner about the poor child, he even dared to suggest sending the boy away to some ‘special’ hospital, and he’s suggested it on multiple occasions but thankfully every time the filthy man brought it up the women shot it down without hesitation, the last time he said it she treated him saying shed leave him before she gave up on her own child. I felt pride in the human women, she’s a true mother protecting her babies.

Unfortunately the man didn’t see it that way, he bursted with anger and pushed the women against the wall and through gritted teeth he said, “You are my wife, meaning you belong here with me! You’d really leave me for getting rid of that useless sickly boy? You don’t waste a bone on a dying dog!”, he spat into her ear as she softly sobbed. I felt the anger rise in me but I couldn’t blow my cover expesially not for a human, even if she doesn’t deserve this and even though she is Lord Yatos mother. I decided what to do, and i threw a rock i found right through the window it was a simple act to get his attention while she ran into the bathroom with relief as she slammed the door behind her to hide from him until he calms down. I swiftly hid in the bushes as he inspected the window and found nothing there but the rock i threw and shattered glass. That was the first time I’ve actually interacted with the family and Lord Yato was already 6 years old, little did i know things would only keep getting worse from this point.

At the end of that year they found out the boys mother had a weak heart, she always used gardening as her therapy and she loved when the child helped her and he seemed to enjoy it almost as much as her. The other child though, Seth became quite the little brat, constantly feeding from his fathers antics. The pest started bully My little Lord, and i grew tired of it rather quick, i found myself giving into the hate on multiple occasions and felt guilty about it every time but its just a little payback for my little lord, and in all honestly they started as harmless pranks. The first time it was just because the little brat tripped my little Lord and he scraped up his hands and knees, i gritted my teeth when the runt laughed at him when he tensed up from the pain. Without hesitation i threw a sharpe stone at the apple tree by him and it cut loose 3 apples that fell directly on the brats head, it hurt his pride more than anything but it was worth it to see my Little Lord laugh.

I tried not getting involved but the bulling kept getting worse, and sometimes i just couldn’t help myself, I’m irritated my Lord hasn’t stuck up for himself, he never even told his mother his brother was a little jerk. A harmless apple prank started leading to misplacing a few items, getting birds to deficate on him was a personal favorite of mine but eventually i got a little carried away. Started lifting tree roots to trip him, being chased by field mice, getting sprained by a skunk, and getting him to face plant into puddles, than i took it too far. Seth pushed Lord Yato to the ground and started kicking dirt on him. Lord Yato was 7 and Seth was 9, i saw what he did to him and I couldn’t do anything for the moment but later that day Seth was climbing up in a tree and i saw i wasp nest directly up where he was climbing, without so much as a thought or consideration, i threw a pine cone hard enough to go straight through it, i just wanted them to fly around above him to scare him back down since if he fell he wasn’t high enough to get hurt, but i miscalculated. The impact was too much and it shook the whole nest, where it was hanging onto the tree snapped and it fell directly on Seth. I saw them swarm him and start stinging him, he fell from the tree screaming in agony for help, i was shocked I didn’t understand what was wrong, I’ve been stung by millions of those things and I’ve seen the other humans be stung they never had this reaction, the boy went hysterical . I was about to assist but the mother father and My Little Lord came running out to aid the screaming boy. The man and woman’s faces went into even more panic when they saw he got stung so many times by the wasps, the man ran the boy to the car and they all rushed to the hospital, i followed as my concern continued growing for the child, i felt awful about what I’ve done, I did something to cause so much pain for this child.

When they settled into the hospital room, Seth was hooked up to some medical stuff, and i over heard the doctors talk to the parents, What i heard broke my heart, “ Seth will be okay now but with his wasp allergy this could have been so much more server, the boy could’ve died if you got here any later, I’d recommend more supervision while playing outside, you could also use pesticides to help lessen the chances of this happening again in the future, we’d like to keep him here over night for observation but he should be ready to go home in the morning.”, the doctor finished and left the parents to their selves. I haven’t interfered since that day, unfortunately even with a near death experience Seth returned to his normal bully self in a few short days, i could only continue to watch him hurt my Little Lord.

The Next year was a bigger part of Lord Yato’s new life, and my heart only hurts for everything he’s been through. Shortly after Lord Yatos 8th birthday his mother condition continued to get worse and his mother and father were in constant arguments because the father just couldn’t stand that Lord Yato wasn’t in school yet, if i gathered correctly humans normally start school at 5 but he was already 8, the foolish human doctors kept telling them that public school wasn’t safe for the child because of his ‘weak immune system’. Their last argument was when he mentions sending the boy away again and the women became furious and for the first time since I’ve been here she slapped him clean across the face leaving her small hand print red on his cheek. The man seemed taken aback before he became fatal and once again many years later slammed her whole body into the dent in the wall from last time, the woman eyes went wide as her back hit the wall and a boom went off as thunder and lightning roared outside, she slid down the wall and one arm went to grin her chest the other holding up her throbbing arm. I was stunned watching from the rain, the impact caused her to have a heart attack, the man panicked and called 911, the EMTs loaded her up in an ambulance. The bastard took Seth with him to the hospital and left Poor Master Yato at the house alone to wonder if his mother is coming home. He cried almost the whole time, i wanted to do nothing more than comfort him, but what could i do for him without blowing my cover, not to mention, how could you comfort a child knowing their father is the reason for his mothers condition.

I hid when i saw the car pull up hours later, the man and boy were the only ones that got out and went inside, I didn’t see the women at all. When i looked into the window i saw Seth run upstairs with tears in his eyes, and the man stood right beside Little yato and looked at him with such hate, not answering his questions about his mother at all, when My Little Lord understood what was going on his eyes filled with tears all over and this cruel bastard said nothing but,”its your fault” in a gritted voice As he left the boy standing there speechless. That filthy beast of a man broke that child in just 3 words, and it burned me up inside, i had to flee for just a moment, i flew 3 towns over and released my anger on every single halo i flew into contact with that night.

Two weeks after the funeral the broken family moved to Allentown Pennsylvania to start a new life, so i thought. The father started drinking everyday and it continued to get worse, 3 weeks into living in their new house something in the mans head snapped, Lord Yato accidentally dropped a picture of his mother and the glass shattered alerting the father, when he saw the broken picture and the boy trying to clean it up he flipped a table scaring the child, he grabbed My Little Lords arm tightly and yanked him up the stairs throwing him into his room, he hit the floor hard with a thud, the man slowly closed the door behind him and pulled off his belt. The child’s eyes fell to the belt and the boys eyes held nothing but fear as the man approached him, he hit him and hit him, over, and over. My breath stuck in my throat and my heart cracked, i pressed my back to the wall away from the window and sobbed quietly as i heard the cries of my beloved master, to control my anger i dug my nails so deep in my skin it bled. I heard the door open and slam as the man left, i stood there listening to the pained whimpering of my lord, it broke everything in me not to do a damn thing, if i knew this was just the start I might have just killed the man right there and then, but I didn’t know, how would I have known.

……5 YEARS LATER……

My Little Lord is finally 13 a teenager, he’s grown quite a lot since than, he’s changed due to the excessive abuse from both his father and his brother. Seth started bulling My Lord alot more since his father started beating him, the worthless brat is always being a constant thorn in my side. Seth has taken his bullying to straight abuse, he’s started throwing heavy objects at my lord, and soon enough he started putting his hands on him. The first time Seth actually hit his brother was when My brave Lord tried standing up for himself against his father when he was 11, his father was trying to whip him with the belt because he accidentally bumbed into the table and a whiskey bottle fell and shattered, Lord Yato grabbed the belt and refused to let go, his father grabbed the boys wrist and threw him at the foot of the steps, when Little Lord Yato went to run up the stairs he threw a vase at his father unfortunately it only made him angrier and when the child tried to run up the steps he turned to be met fist straight into his face sending him back to the floor as his nose started to bleed. A shocked but beaming 13 year old Seth was standing right where the little one used to be. I didn’t think his little heart could break anymore but it did and you could see it in his teary eyes as he stared at his older brother. Seth looked from his whimpering little brother to his father to see his reaction, his eyes light up when his father smerked at what he witnessed, he seemed practically thrilled even if not proud of his golden child.

My Little lord just couldn’t understand why things turned out like this, his father can’t even stand to look at him, at first he just didn’t like the poor child but now the little boy is just a constant reminder of his late wife. The bastard hates himself for what he did to his wife that he takes it out on a child that looks like a boy version of her.

The incident made my stomach curl, I couldn’t let this stand could I, he gave my Lord a blood nose for Goddess sake, but Seth is also just a child that lost his mother as well and its not his fault for the old geezers crudeness.

My Little Lord ran up the stairs and into his room, i followed to the window and looked into the room, all i could see was the poor boy sit in front of his door holding his knees to his chest as he sobbed. My eyes teared up as i looked at him shamefully, i want to comfort him, i want to hold him to my chest until all his fears fade away. Without realizing i cracked the window open letting in a soft breeze that caught the boys attention, he opened his eyes just a peek and saw my shadow on the floor of his room, in an instance his eyes darted up looking straight into my eyes. I froze in that very instant, my hand still on the window, looking right at him. Slowly it dawned on me and the panic was evident on my face, i wanted to back away but my foot slipped off the side and i fell forward right into the window causing it to open all the way as i laid flat on my stomach with a grunt of pain from the impact, i slowly lifted my head just to be met with a wide eyed pair of bright blue orbs staring into mine merely a foot away if that. I was stunned, he’s so close and I couldn’t think.

“Are you my guardian angle, are you here to take me away from my mean brother and dad?”, the little boy asked in such an innocent voice, he sounded as if he wanted me to take him far, far away from here, I couldn’t blame him, but I can’t take him yet, he’s too young still. I slowly pushed myself up into a sitting position never breaking eye contact from the child, he just slowly followed my lead and sat Kris- cross apple sauce directly in front of me. His eyes were still teary but he looked more fascinated than scared or sad, he kept gazing at my wings as if he could think of nothing more than touching them, i couldn’t help but give him a soft smile.

“Not exactly sweet child, i watch over you but i cannot take you with me yet, i wish i could take you somewhere safe, but I’m afraid I can’t take you from this life yet”, i said regretfully, he tilted his head down and looked at the floor as if he was about to start crying again and it torn me inside to have hurt his feelings, i only wanted to comfort him but all i did was blow my cover and hurt him all over again. I looked at the boy and decided i will have to erase his memory of meeting me but first, the least i can do is cheer him up and possibly give him something to dream of. My memory dust isn’t full proof, there is a possibility of remembering what was supposed to be forgotten but it can only be an issue if something is strong enough to trigger the memory. So when i do this I can’t risk him catching me again or ill have to keep repeating the process and that wouldn’t be much of an issue if i had an unlimited supply. I’d make more but some of the ingredients i need are only found in the Yokai realm, which in my position has been a constant inconvience, i have maybe 3-4 more doses of this powder before i run out of my supply completely.

For now though all i want is to cheer him up so lets make this dose count. I lifted up the boys chin to look at me, i felt a spark as soon as i made contact with his skin, it was an indescribable feeling but it just felt warm, and comforting, it seemed he felt the same spark which was becular but i put it aside and continued to make the boy look at me.

“Sweet, honest, and brave little Yato, no I can’t take with me now but one day I’m going to take you with me to a beautiful and magical place, a place where everyone loves you, everyone would do anything for you, you’ll never feel alone and we will never try to hurt you. I will always be by your side, you may not see me but i will always be there for you, protecting you and keeping you safe from afar.”, i held the child chin as i spoke so i knew he would listen to every word i said, i wanted to see in his eyes that he knew i was telling the truth, his eyes teared up even more and slowly they started to fall as he looked into my eyes latching onto every single word. I brushed away his remaing tears lightly with the tips on my fingers, and slowly wiped away the dry blood under his nose as gently as i could so not to hurt his already bright red nose. The boys faced turned completely red in an instant from the unexpected kindness.

I pulled him close to my chest and pressed the back of my hand on his forehead, “Are you feeling alright Little Yato?”, i asked the sweet child with concern.

“Y-yes ma’am”, the boy answered flustered as his cheeks became heated. I could see him staring at my wings again and i positioned Little Yato to sit in my lap, he looked at me confused but all I could do was slightly giggle at his expression. I slowly brought my wings closer to him, he backed up a little not knowing what to do.

“Would you like to touch them?”, I asked the boy, he looked up at me with the look of a child getting the biggest gift on Christmas, i gave him a soft smile and nudged him closer to them a little to encourage him. He Looked at my wings then back at me as if to ask if i was sure, it was so cute and innocent i loved spending this time with him. He slowly lifted his hand and glided his fingers through the feathers of my wings, his touch was gentle and his little hands were soft, it didn’t hurt what so ever. He gracefully touched my feathers as if they were fragile and would fall apart if he touched them with even the slightest force, it was adorable how gentle he was. He spent a good 5 minutes admiring my wings until i decided to give him a ‘magic show’.

I plucked one single feather from my wing as he watched with horror, i giggled and placed it in his hands holding them side by side. “Yato, What’s your favorite animal?”, i whispers in his ear as we both looked at the feather in his hands.

“Well, I’m not really sure, i guess my favorite animal is a phoenix, its like a bird but its always on fire!”, the boy explained with excitement.

I looked at the boy in my lap and just talking about the bird made him so happy, I couldn’t wait to see his face in just a second.

In an instant my feather turned to flames and an image of a small birds figure grew in his hands, his eyes went big and he leaned his back into me for comfort, i grew the little bird and let it fly freely around the room as we both watched it and giggled to each other, My Little Lord was so happy as he chased the bird around the room in glee. I loved seeing him so happy but everything always comes to end, i wanted more time with My Little Lord, i wanted him to have so much more but the fates had a different plan.

Seth stood stunned as he watched the flying bird made of violet flames just evaporate infront of his very eyes, than he stared directly at me as i sprung into action. I threw the memory dust at my Little lord causing him to collapse on the bed into a slumber he shouldn’t wake from until morning, i than leaped behind Seth Closing the door and slamming him to the floor. I knew what i was doing was wrong and I didn’t realize how angry i still was about the incident earlier but he wasn’t going to remember a thing so i didnt care at the moment. My eyes glowed a bright neon blue as i stared into the boys eyes, i gritted my teeth and leaned towards his ear, “Listen to me you worthless rat, your damned lucky you haven’t risked My Lords life yet or I’d rip you limb from limb, i pray you find a better path than what you’ve chosen to follow so far, and so help me goddess if you continue to hurt him you better hope you don’t run into me again or ill hurt you so bad your worthless father will fall to his knees at your early grave”, i spoke with venom in my voice.

The boy shook underneath me but all that did was fuel his foolish rage, “Why, Why him! I’m so much better than that useless wimp, he is nothing in comparison to me! Why don’t you chose me instead, I’m stronger than him, and I’m better at everything! I deserve everything not him!” The boy thrashed under my grip and it only continued to anger me so i tightened my grip on his throat and spoke softly in his ear, “You are nothing to me, you are not worthy of my protection nor are you worthy of my loyalty. I wouldn’t never follow someone like you, you are the truly weak one.”, i spoke through gritted teeth. As i went to reach for my memory powder he spoke, “ You’re wrong, I’ll always be better than him, and i will take everything he loves away from him! I Deserve it so it will be mine!” He said fuming in anger as i sprinkled the dust over his face and put him on the floor in his own room.

I returned back to Lord Yatos room and tucked him in, i left with a kiss on his head. I flew out of the window and just kept going, i felt i have done something i will live to regret, something is tugging at the back of my mind, what did that brat mean when he said, “everything he loves he’ ll take?”. I went on a long fly as i just felt a continuous tug at my heart and head. I’m hoping for the best but honestly I’m expecting the worse, but only time will tell, at least i got to see my Little Lord smile, its been so long since I’ve seen him smile like that and it warmed my heart. I just hate he wont be able to remember, but maybe one day he might remember this encounter, i just hope he isn’t angry with how fast i had to end the moment.