Forgive Me My Lord

Chapter 2: Walking with your dreams

Chapter 2

Walking with your dreams

YATO'S POV)

******WARNING******

This chapter contains possible triggers for some of the audience. This chapter included: Child abuse, domestic violence, and cursing.

Ever since that night, things just keep becoming more and more odd. I’ve started having dreams about that girl that may have saved me that night, and because of her I’ve become overly educated on supernatural beings with wings by spending at least up to four hours at the library doing research after work for about six to seven months straight, which only made my dreams even weirder. At that time, I believe the most occurring dream I had was of the girl that was there the night my father was killed, her lips were moving as if she was trying to talk to me but I couldn’t make out what she was trying to say, she looked so serious and also somewhat sympathetic when she looked at me. Maybe she understood what it was like to grow up with an abusive father, or maybe she understood how messed up it was that my own flesh and blood hated me so much he tried to kill me in cold blood. I’ve had the dream many times but every time I had it, it was different in one way or another, either it’d be longer or more detailed.

One time when I had that same dream where it looked like she was trying to tell me something, it looked as if she was telling me to remember who I am, but when I try to ask her what she means by “remember who I am” then she busted out into violet flames, but in my dream when I looked down I was standing in almost the same flames but they weren’t violet flames they were blue, I woke up in a hot sweat but the hotel room was freezing, yet my skin felt like I was being burned alive. At that point that’s how I woke up every night for another 3 months. Still haven’t been able to go home because the cops still haven’t found the murderer, so they didn’t think it’d be safe for me to go home until they catch the killer, I didn’t mind, I had more important things to worry about. I started going to counseling because those dreams just kept getting worse, I started waking up screaming as if I really were being burned alive but the doctor said it’s just because I’m suffering from PTSD, post-traumatic stress disorder and manic anxiety, I thought it was a load of bullshit, they just wanted to make a quick buck off me, they don’t really care what’s wrong with me, but I still took the meds they gave me I thought maybe they might help, but it only suppressed the dreams for about a week, but when it stopped working it was like I felt all of those nights I’ve missed at once, I swear it felt like I was just lying in fire every night I could feel the heat of the flames on my skin, but I guess I just got so used to it that it didn’t hurt anymore it was just really f*****g hot and kind of started to piss me off.

At this point I haven’t had a decent night’s sleep in over 7 months. It’s been a brutal year so far. I haven’t had many dreams about the girl lately, but I didn’t know why. One day I got off work a little earlier because it, was a pretty slow week, so I got a paid vacation and I’ll admit I needed it. I went to the store to pick up some groceries for my hotel room but on the way back I had a weird feeling that I was being watched, and honestly after the incident with the old man I started keeping a pocket knife on me at all times so I don’t have a little repeat of that day, can’t always be so lucky to survive a bat beating. I tried not making it obvious that I analyzed everything around me to see if I could spot anything out of the norm but only one thing stood out to me and honestly, when I noticed her it scared me so bad I thought I was going to piss my pants. Someone was down the street by the corner in a long black cape with its hood covering the face, I could tell it was a girl by her figure. She was about 5”5 tall and had a slim body but that’s all I was really able to see in such a quick glance. She was just standing there by the corner, but I could feel her staring at me, I was tempted to say something, but I didn’t think that’d be a good idea, I didn’t want to provoke her to do something. I also didn’t want to lead her to where I was staying because that would just be stupid in my part, so I decided to walk in the opposite direction of the hotel but if I needed to make a clean get away I made sure there were plenty of ways out for me. I took my eyes off of the woman for one minute and instantly regretted it because when I turned around she was gone, I thought I was going insane from lack of sleep because that was literally impossible for any person to vanish that quick from where she was.

I can tell you one thing I never ran so fast in my life, my gym teacher would have been proud of me, but of course being so panicked I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going and ran right into traffic, I stood there in the middle of the road frozen in fear and held my eyes shut so tight you’d think they were glued together, while thinking about everything I’ve never been able to do in my life yet, I was thinking damn I’m going to die a virgin, and I’m never going to learn more about the girl from that night. Then an instant thought came to mind right as I felt a growing pain in my side, it didn’t feel like I got hit by a car or anything, but it felt like someone ran into me and tightly locked their arms around my abdomen, for about 5 seconds I felt like I was flying until I felt something brush against my face, it felt soft and kind of tickled. I thought I was being delusional I thought I was hearing a girl’s voice, she kept saying something, but I was too zoned out to understand, but it kept getting louder and louder until I became responsive. When I opened my eyes while gripping my hurt side from the impact, I never expected to see the girl from my dreams and from that night, she was also the one I was running from, I just laid there on the ground staring at her bright blue eyes, they looked like they were glowing as if the light was just being absorbed by the street lamps. They are so enchanting, I was so dazed by them I didn’t realize she was saying something to me until I felt her hands on my face, they were so cold; I could feel her start shaking me to my senses, I was able to understand what she was saying but I didn’t comprehend why she was calling me by that name, she just continued asking the same question, “My lord are you okay?- Are you hurt- Do you need healing?” she said it so casually and I was just looking at her like, “you must have me confused with someone else?”.

She continued this until she seemed a little aggravated, and it seems she must have seen or heard something that got her on edge because she grabbed my hand forcefully and only says, “My lord we must go, they’re coming, we must get you to safety-“, during her sentence I pulled free from her hold and from my confusion I asked the least important question at the moment, “are you the girl from that night- in my apartment? Who are you-have we ever met?”. You could tell by the look she gave me she had no intention on answering any of my questions at the moment, but she did start with that ‘my lord” crap again, “my lord I will answer your questions when your life is not in danger, your safety is my first priority nothing comes above that for the time being- now please we must hurry, they are close”, she said it so calm but you can hear the irritation in her voice and without caring for a response she grabbed my arm once more and started running through the alley. Right as I was going to ask another question she halted directly In Front of me and without warning pushed me so hard I hit the side of the building, holding my shoulder in agony I looked at the girl in pure shock when I realized why she did something like that so sudden, there were three man like beings but they looked like angels, long golden hair, outstandingly incredible wings bursting from their broad shoulders, but their eyes were the color of pure silver, It made them look some emotionless kind of like a zombie or puppet , they surrounded her as if there was about to be a fight. I could feel my heart in my throat and my palms and neck break out in a cold sweat, sitting on the ground thinking damn what the hell is going on here. The three men drew spears alike. They looked like they were made of pure gold with a rim just hovering around the tip that looked sharp enough to cut through skin like butter. While I was there, nearly about to s**t my pants, I looked at the girl, she just stood there for a few seconds until she pulled her hood down exposing her long white hair and fierce blue eyes. Just the way she stood there she kind of looked demonic but breathtaking. That’s when it crossed me, there’s no way they are human, they were like angels or something supernatural, but why do the men that look like they fell from heaven sound like bad guys?

The moon's light was beaming off the girl as if she was reflecting the light, she looked so beautiful, and I noticed she was giving me a glance, it looked like she was showing me a slight grin as if she was about to show off or reassure me. Not even a second later within a quick flash of a second, one of the winged men was on their knees with blood gushing from his neck and the girl still standing in the same spot but with a long scythe, a black handle and a silver blade. On only the very tip of the blade there was a line of sparkling red liquid dripping to the floor. I was stunned and horrified by what might happen next. In seconds, a heated fight broke out between the last two men and the girl. She hadn’t even moved a foot during the whole fight, as if she were just practicing with a few noobs, as if she became bored. With just one last s***h, all three men laid lifeless on the concrete.

I was petrified, I couldn’t get my eyes off the white-winged men lying motionless on the ground. I didn’t know what to do, what to say, or how to even act towards this. Like this chick just slaughtered three buff ass guys without even breaking a sweat. Honestly, at that point, I was more scared of her than those guys. While I was still sitting there mortified, she got my attention by walking towards me, I seriously thought I was going to piss myself. I tried backing up but ended up backing into the side of the building. When she was in arms reach, she crouched down where our eyes met on the same level. She looked confused by my actions. I just stared at her hoping for mercy, I guess as if to try reasoning with me or something she told me she didn’t understand why I looked so pale, or why I acted frightened. I swore if she wasn’t so terrifying I’d tell her how stupid she was to say that there was no reason for the way I was reacting to her killing those guys, I mean, come on the closest I came to seeing someone murdered in front of me was the old man almost a year ago.

That’s when without even thinking I blurted out, “you were the one who killed my father, the old man, that night in my apartment, weren’t you? - How the hell did you know where I lived? How did you even get in!?”. One thing after another just kept pouring out, all the questions I’ve been asking myself since that day just forced itself into words. She looked a little stunned, possibly because there were so many questions or also because I didn’t give her the chance to answer any of the questions from asking one after another after another. As I kept rambling and demanding answers, she became impatient and within two seconds had her hand covering my mouth and pressing her lips against her hand. I froze with shock, I felt my cheeks become hot, and my heart was pounding so hard I could feel it in my throat. Her hands were so soft and cool it felt good pressed against my burning face, by her being so close I could smell a hint of strawberries and oranges from her hair, but her skin smelt of vanilla, even though she only did this for about ten seconds I could still feel her touch when she pulled away, I kind of wish she continued for a little longer, I couldn’t get enough of her sent, it was intoxicating and I wanted just a little more.

I suppose from her facial expression she did it just to shut me up and was relieved it worked, I was still too dazed to do or say anything about it, but I could still feel the warmth in my cheeks. While I stared at her like a geek that just got a compliment from a girl he has a crush on she eventually broke the silence, “ My apologies for such a sudden display but I didn’t know anything else to do to calm you down, my lord I understand if you are upset with me because I didn’t receive you’re permission to engage battle with those three, but It was simply for your protection, most of the time they don’t give much of a heads up of their arrival. I understand if you’d punished me for my unapproved display, but I only had your best interests in mind, my lord I do hope you could forgive me- and I will also willingly accept any punishment you’ve chosen for my behavior in approaching you so suddenly.”, she said it so obediently, and with no hesitation, my mind was going wild, what did she mean by accepting any punishment I give her willingly, I’m starting to think this chick is submissive or something, but thinking so much into it I only felt my face get hotter, I started thinking to myself, “what the hell am I thinking about, she just killed three guys in front of me and I’m just sitting here thinking about naughty things that could be considered as a punishment. I’m insane, and her calling me ‘my lord’ makes things so much more off base.”

While continuing to think of ways I could be misinterpreting what she’s saying , I realized she still leaning in pretty close to me and for some reason my eyes were drawn to look down at her chest for no intentional reason, but then realizing her dress was cut a little, exposing some of her skin underneath. Remembering where I was staring, I felt my whole face and neck become burning red, I covered and gripped my mouth in embarrassment and guilt for looking, I tried so hard to not have any type of eye contact. I could feel her looking at me and the pressure of everything that’s happened in the past thirty minutes had me sitting there pondering and felt like I was squirming from my lustful thoughts. Suddenly I felt her come closer which made my heart race, I leaned my head back laying against the brick wall I had my back pressed against. I heard her soft voice, “My lord are you feeling okay? You looked flushed, it’s possibly my fault for putting you through so much so soon. -is it okay if I check your forehead?”. How could I refuse her simple request, and I’d be able to feel her soft hand again I replied, “y-yes, you may.”, in a low suffocating tone. When I felt her hand touch my skin, I got goosebumps and caught myself leaning my head closer to her hand, her cool touch felt amazing, she unintentionally brushed her fingers through my long bangs, I felt myself shiver. I slowly realized when she put her hand on me I closed my eyes to focus on her touch and sent, I swore it felt like the best high I’ve ever had, I slowly opened my eyes, revealing how close she was, the way she was leaning towards me if I just sat up I’d be nose to nose with her, it was weird her hands were cold but I could feel heat coming off of her body by how close she was. I tried not to panic but I thought my heart was about to break my rib cage by how hard it was beating, I decided to continue leaning against the wall but I was enchanted by her eyes they were beautiful like the blue moon in the midnight black sky.

Between looking at her eyes and lips at that point I could die a happy man, once again she broke the endless silence, her hand now pressed against my cheek, “ My lord, let’s get you to the safe place, as soon as we get there you can get some needed rest, when you wake up I will answer as many questions as I can. Plus, the longer we stay out in the open the higher the chances we will run into more Halos.”. The look she had on her face was a mixture of sympathy and seriousness, but what did she mean ‘Halos’ is that what those men were called? Normally when you say halos you think of these beautiful and peaceful angels with a pure glow and a gold hoop hovering over their head, this s**t is just getting more and more confusing, I really don’t know how I’m supposed to relate to any of this crap, I mean come on, I’m a simple guy with a troubled past, honestly the only thing abnormal about me is the disease I have, but that’s it, the only way this affects me is I get sick really easy and I may not live past 30, I’d be given mercy if I could live up to 35. I’m 25 right now but when all this happened, I had just turned 19, but any how back to what I was saying, I agreed to go with her, just because I wasn’t really feeling up to a debate.

Before we left, I looked where the three bodies were supposed to be and was stunned to find that they were replaced by gold sand. The last question I asked before we left was, “what happened to their remains?”.

She simply replied, “when a Halo dies their body breaks down into small particles like sand but made of gold fragments’. The same thing happens to Yokai like me, but instead of turning to golden sand- we turn to ashes.”. She stated refusing to look at me, I guess this question made her uncomfortable because she had a distant look on her face as if remembering something that brought back an unpleasant memory.