Chapter Twenty-Four: Jealous
875 Words
Marcus's POV
I chose to be alone.
I needed some fresh air because it felt like I could no longer breathe.
Seeing my half-brother and my ex-girlfriend together was like hell.
I had spent a long time trying to forget Lyndsay from the day I found out that I had responsibilities to Vanessa.
I was cruel and heartless for breaking Lyndsay's heart, and I couldn't bear to make her suffer even more knowing that I was already tied to someone else.
The fact that I slept with another woman was already a huge mistake, and Gabby was the result of that mistake.
Growing up without my father by my side wasn't easy, and I didn't want my child to experience the same thing.
Yes, my mother and father's marriage was a failure.
They were best friends who became lovers, but eventually they separated, just like some of my classmates' parents when I was in grade school.
The reason was simple—Mom never truly loved Dad. Tristan's father had been gone for a long time, yet it seemed that my mother's heart had been buried with him.
Dad couldn't take it anymore, so their decision was mutual. They chose to separate rather than continue hurting each other.
Mom longed for her first love, while Dad searched for a love she could never give him.
Well, I was okay with it, even when I was a child. I understood them.
But as a child, it still felt like you had been left behind in the middle.
It was lonely. It was painful.
And I never wanted Gabby to experience that.
Since I was also responsible for the sin Vanessa and I committed, I decided that wherever I had fallen, that was where I would begin to stand up again.
I had done something terribly wrong to my brother.
But there was nothing I could do anymore.
Vanessa was carrying my child—the woman my brother loved so much.
I was wrong.
I couldn't stay away from Vanessa.
I had already stepped aside once because I knew how much my brother loved her, but in the end, I was still weak.
She succeeded in seducing me one night during a college friends' get-together.
Because of too much alcohol and the misunderstanding between Lyndsay and me, I made a huge mistake.
And now, here I am...
Hurting.
I couldn't bear to see them happy and in love.
Couldn't it be me instead?
Earlier, I followed them to the waterfall.
I saw them kiss.
I wanted to scream.
I know it's crazy.
But when I saw how intimate they were, I felt like stopping my own brother.
Lyndsay never gave herself to me during our one-year relationship, and I respected that. I respected her boundaries.
Maybe if I hadn't made that mistake, I would be in Tristan's position right now.
Maybe Lyndsay and I would be the ones happily together.
Now I'm sitting by the pool, wanting nothing more than to drown myself in alcohol again.
Maybe then I could forget.
Every time I pass by Lyndsay and Tristan's room, I feel like losing control as I imagine what they're doing inside.
Are they holding each other?
Are they kissing?
Or worse...
I thought that after seven years, I had finally succeeded in forgetting the woman I loved so deeply.
But I was wrong.
I hadn't forgotten her.
I had simply gotten used to the pain of losing her.
And now that I see she's happy, I can't accept it.
A part of me still hopes that she's only here to get revenge on me and that she still loves me.
At first, I never intended to hurt Tristan.
But this time, I almost want to.
What if Lyndsay still loves me?
I doubt she has truly forgotten me.
She loved me once...
I need to know what Lyndsay really feels.
If I have to remind her that I was her true love, then I'll do it.
I don't care if she's really pregnant.
I can accept that.
What I can't accept is seeing her give all her attention to my half-brother.
I can't stand my immature, selfish, stubborn, and spoiled wife anymore.
Being with Vanessa every day feels worse than being imprisoned.
And the worst part is...
I don't love her.
I regret the day I became weak.
Yes, Gabby was born because of that mistake, and I love my son dearly. I have never regretted becoming his father.
But I do regret choosing Vanessa to be the mother of my child.
This time... forgive me, Gabby, but I think I would become a better person if your mother and I were no longer together.
This time, I won't allow Lyndsay to forget me.
I'm going to take her back from my brother.
I won't let her love someone else.
I'm taking Lyndsay back.
If it's a sin, then I'm ready to sin again.
I'm sorry, Tristan.
But I love Lyndsay.
I realize now that I can't completely let her go.
It's like dying every single day.
Maybe I'm selfish.
But this time, Lyndsay, I'll prove to you that I'm the one you truly love.
In the end...
We'll still find our way back to each other.
- Writer
