To Kiss My True Memories

CHAPTER 23

Chapter 23

Maaga ako kunabukasan dahil kailangan ko pang dumaan sa hospital at magpatingin kay Dr. Munar. Gem came with me like what tito Amer wants.

"Do you feel something bad on your head?" Dr. Munar asked after done checking me.

Umiling ako. "Wala naman po. Hmmm, but something came up po." malumanay kong saad.

"What is it?"

"One memory show up on my mind po, doc." ako sabay angat ng tingin sa kaniya.

Bahagyan siyang nagulat sa sinabi ko. She stare at me for a while seems examining me before she speak.

"So, I guess something happened to you?"

Dahan-dahan akong napatango.

"We found her lying on the ground, doc." singit ni Gem sa seryosong boses.

Napabaling sa kaniya si Dr. Munar. She's here also inside the room where Dr. Munar checking me. She's really busy manipulating her phone that's why I thought she's not listening about my conversation with Dr. Munar but I was wrong.

"It took almost an hour before she woke up." she explained shortly.

Dr. Munar turned to me with her serious eyes. "Kairra, you should inform me about it. Delikado ang ganon, you should call me immediately. What Gemi said about it."

"Actually doc, mom and dad doesn't know." si Gem ulit.

"Doc, I'm fine naman po. Hindi naman po sumakit ang ulo ko. Swear I'm really fine po." paliwanag ko agad kay doktora.

Dr. Munar sighed. "Still, you should always inform me everytime something came up. Your condition is very worse and complicated. Kung mangyari man ulit iyon ay call me immediately."

"Yes, doc. Ayoko lamang pong mag-alala ang relatives ko. Promise, I'm really fine po. Hindi po sumakit ang ulo ko. Hindi na po mauulit." sinabayan ko ito ng paulit-ulit na iling.

"They're also worried about your condition. Kaya sana huwag mo ng uulitin iyon." Dr. Munar said as she smiled at me. "Your tito Amer and tita Gemi will know about it once they ask about your condition. I will be honest to them upang mas maobserbahan nila ang kalagayan mo."

I sighed silently. "I understand po, doc."

I bit my lips as I slowly bowed my head. I decided with my own again. I didn't think kung anong mas makakabuti sa akin.

"Anyway, your condition is on good for now I hope you will maintain it. Please, watch yourself and if something bad came up call me immediately, katulad na lamang kung mawalan ka ng malay. Just be honest with me, I'm your doctor. I'm also worried about your condition, Kairra." she explained softly.

"Yes po, doc." nag-angat ako ng tingin at tipid siyang nginitian.

Matapos magpatingin kay Dr. Munar ay dumeretsyo na kami ni Gem sa restaurant. Sa sasakyan niya ako sumakay habang ang drive ko ay nakasunod naman sa aming likuran. Tahimik kaming dalawa ni Gem at ang malalalim at paulit-ulit na bugtong hininga ko lamang ang naririnig.

I'm thinking Tito and Tita. Alam kong magagalit sila once they find out about what happened to me.

"Baka hindi na ako payagan ni Tito sa susunod once he find out about what happened last week." pag-aamin ko kay Gem sa malungkot na boses. "Ayoko lamang talagang mag-alala kayo." dagdag ko.

Gem take a glance to me while driving. "Just explain to them. At isa pa ay maayos naman ang lahat ngayon but we really need to do and fallow what Dr. Munar said."

"Yeah." taging nasabi ko.

Natahimik muli ako. Humilig na lamang sa upuan at humarap sa bintana bago kinuha ang selpon sa dalang bag nang nagbeep ito ng tatlong beses dahil sa kakapasok na mga memsahe. Galing ito kay Darrow at meron din ang galing kay Sheeme.

Darrow:

You sure you can now? If you're not I will just going to pay you a visit in your house, instead.

Darrow:

Just rest when you're not feeling well.

Mabilis muna akong nagtipa ng mensahe para kay Darrow, nagpasyang huli ng babasahin ang message ni Sheeme. She's texting me too, asking about my condition.

Ako:

I'm fine now. I'm on my way now in our restaurant. See you mamaya. Good luck to your work.

Sheeme:

Hi, K. I wish you're doing well. I want to pay you a visit in your home but my schedule is too hectic. I guess see you soon na lang.

I quickly type my reply for her.

Ako:

Hi, Sheeme. I'm doing well. Tito and Tita allow me naman na na lumabas pero sa restaurant lang. Can we meet if you're not too busy?

Now, I get it why seems I'm used to everytime she's teasing me. I get it now why she became my manager even she doesn't want to. I get it now why she's saying something weird about me that I didn't know. I get it now everything because she's part of my past which is the memories I lost and she's my best friend.

She's my best friend, I guess we're really close to each other before? So, there's a possibility that she knows a lot about me?

"Speaking of... mom is calling." saad ni Gem sa kalagitnaan ng pagmamaneho niya.

Naputol ang pag-iisip ko at mabilis na napabaling sa kaniya, napaayos sa pagkakaupo.

"I guess, they already know now what happened." aniya sabay sulyap muli sa akin. "Siguro'y kinamusta ka nila kay Dr. Munar and she can't lie about your true condition."

"Yeah, take the call now." matamlay kong saad.

Huminto kami sa traffic light, mabilis ang pagbaling ni Gem sa akin at tumitig ng matagal bago sinagot ang tawag. I sighed heavily as I face to the window.

"Yes, mom." narinig kong sagot ni Gem.

"Is Kairra still with you? How's her? Dr. Munar update us what happened to her last week. Why you didn't tell us?" mahinahong saad ni tita Gemi sa kabilang linya.

Kahit hindi nakatingin kay Gem ay naramdaman ko ang pagbaling niya sa akin. Isang malalim na bugtong-hininga muli ang aking pinakawalan, at bago pa sumagot si Gem ay inunahan ko na siya.

"I'm sorry about it, Tita. Ayos naman po ako. Ayoko lang kayong mag-alala. I hope you're not mad, Tita." I said truly.

I heard Tita sighed silently in the other line. "We understand you. We're not mad, we're just worried. Alam namin na kaya mo ng magdesisyon with your own that's why we're letting you now, but please, always take care yourself. We're just here for you." Tita explained softly. "We're not mad." pahabol niya pa.

"Thank you, Tita. Iingatan ko po ang sarili ko." nakangiti kong saad.

"Take care, Kairra."

"Opo, Tita."

"Gem, drive safely and good luck on your work. Don't stress yourself."

Narinig ko ang iritadong pagsinghal ni Gem. "Yes, mom." aniya nang nakangiwi.

Nang matapos ang tawag ay hindi ko tinantanan ng titig si Gem. She looks so iritado but I think hindi sa trabaho niya kung hindi sa kasama niya.

Hmmm.

"You really have problem on you works, huh." I said sarcastically.

"There's a man who always make my day bad! I really hate him! Always!" gigil na gigil niyang saad. "I don't want to see him anymore but it's too imposible! Lagi siyang nandoon kung nasaan ako. He's nananadya na, eh! Kairita!"

Napangiwi ako at nanliliit ang matang tumitig sa kaniya. "Calm down, you were driving."

"Ayystt, I really hate him talaga!" dagdag niya pa at napahampas sa hawak niyang manubela.

Napatikhim ako at tumahimik na lamang sa isang gilid. Eksaktong umabante na kami dahil tapos na sa traffic light. I could still feel Gem irritation while driving. Hinayaan ko na siya at nanatiling tahimik hanggang sa makarating kami sa restaurant.

Nang maihatid ako ni Gem sa restaurant ay around ten in the morning. My server welcome my arrival, though they are worried about my condition that's why ate Sam suggested that I should just stay at home.

I remembered ate Sam with the last memories I recalled. I'm close to her too.

"Kaya ko naman, ate Sam." nakailang sabi na ako dahil natatakot sila sa aking kondisyon.

"Nag-aalala kami sayo, Kairra."

Tipid ko siyang binigyan ng ngiti. "Ayos lang talaga, ate Sam. I will be in the kitchen, I will cook for my luch. Kung may costumer na gusto akong makausap can you please accompany them for now?"

"Kami ng bahala. Huwag kang masyadong magpakapagod." paalala niya pa.

Isang tango ang binigay ko sa kaniya bago tuluyang dumeretsyo sa kitchen, buti na lamang ay wala ng bumanggit sa insidenteng nangyari sa akin dito with Zurina and her friend.

As I entered in the kitchen chef Loisa and other server greeted me. I greeted them back and proceed to cook on my own.

Like what I promise to Darrow, I will cook foods for him. I don't know what his favorite that's why I prepared some of my favorite foods. I hope he will like it.

Bago ako magsimulang magluto ay nagtipa muna mg mensahe para kay Darrow.

Ako:

Just text me when you're on your way na mamaya patunta dito sa restaurant. I have a surprise for you. ^_^

Nakangiti kong binaba ang selpon upang makapagsimula ng magluto. I wear first my apron, gloves and hairnet. Masaya akong nagluto at hindi na nagpaabala pa sa kahit kanino. Nagpokus ako sa paglulutong ginagawa ko.

I really hope Darrow will like it.

Thirty minutes pass at nakaluto na ako ng dalawang putahe pa lamang. Ramdam ko na ang aking pawis sa noo ngunit hindi naman nakaramdam ng pagod dahil gusto at masaya ako sa aking ginagawa. Though, isn't really heavy because I'm just cooking for two to three person. It's just for me and for Darrow.

It took me almost an hour before I finish all the food I need to cook. Naayos ko narin ang plating at kailangan na lamang itong i-serve. I already order someone to serve it to me for my lunch when Darrow will arrive. Nang wala ng gagawin pa sa kusina ay nagtungo muna ako sa aking opisina upang mag-ayos ng sarili. Kagat ko ang labi para sa pagpigil ng ngiti dahil sa inihanda ko kay Darrow. I hope he will be surprised!

Nasa kalagitnaan ako ng pag-aayos nang marinig ang pagtunog ng aking selpon para sa isang text na kakarating. Mabilis ko itong binasa.

Darrow:

I'm here now downstair. I just arrived.

Nanlaki ang mata ko sa nabasang mensahe niya. He's already here? Why he didn't text me kaninang nasa daan pa lamang siya. Nag-aayos pa lamang ako!

"Shocks, I'm not yet done!" aligaga kong saad.

Aligaga na rin ako sa kung anong susunod na aayusin sa sarili. Nang makitang wala naman na ay humarap muli ako sa salamin at pinasadahan ng tingin ang sarili for the last time. Anyway, for this day I'm wearing my usual clothes. It's a simple fitted one shoulder maroon dress.

After a weeks I will see him again now!

Lumabas ako sa aking maliit na opisina at sumalubong ang counter. Mabilis kong inilibot ang aking mata at namataan si Darrow na nakaupo mag-isa sa isang lamesa hindi kalayunan dito sa counter.

From where is he, I travel my eyes all around him. As his usual clothes, he dressed up with his too formal suit. While there's nothing new about his expression, it's too serious and dark while he's manipulating his phone seems he's typing something.

Hmmm, was he texting someone? Probably about his works?

Saktong pagkalapag niya sa kaniyang selpon sa lamesa ay narinig ko ang pagbeep ng aking selpon sa suot na shoulder bag. I get my phone inside my bag quickly at nabasa na pangalan ni Darrow ang bumungad sa aking screen. Binasa ko agad ito.

Darrow:

Where are you? I can't see you around.

Umukit ang malaking ngiti sa akin pagkabasa ng mensahe niya. I don't know why, it's just a simple but it make me smile.

So, I'm the one he's texting?

Nakangiti kong binalik ang selpon sa bag, hindi na siya nireplyan dahil lalapitan na ito. Ngunit pagkaangat kong tingin sa kaniya ay agad na nagtama ang aming mga mata. Mabilis kong tinikom ang labi na may malaking ngiti dahil sa mensahe niyang nabasa. Though, it's kinda far from where he is I could still clearly saw how his thick brow rose.

Matagal kaming nakatingin sa mata ng isat-isa bago ako nag-iwas ng tingin at nagsimula ng maglakad palapit sa kaniya. Nang makalapit na ako sa kaniya ay nakatayo na siya seem he's really waiting for me to come near him.

"Hmmm, hi, good afternoon." nahihiya kong panimulang bati.

For a minutes he didn't say anything, he's just staring at me. Unti-unti akong napakagat sa labi dahil sa paraan niya ng paninitig sa akin.

"Hmmm, let's go upstairs... hmm so we can have our lunch." ako at nginitian siya. "Gutom ka na ba?" tanong ko pa.

He sighed heavily. "Are you sure you're really feeling well? How's your head? Do you feel something bad right now?" sunod-sunod at seryoso niyang tanong habang nakatitig sa aking mga mata.

"Promise, I'm fine!" malaking ngiti ang binigay ko sa kaniya. "I'm really feeling well. Walang masakit sa akin."

"I'm worried." paos niyang saad.

"Don't be. Maayos talaga ang pakiramdam ko, maayos ako." malumanay kong saad, pilit pinapaniwala sa kaniya ang totoo. "Hmm, let's go upstairs na. Gutom na ako." I chuckled softly.

He sighed helplessly first before he lead my way.

Tahimik kami habang paakyat sa hangdan hanggang sa makarating sa rooftop at sa favorite spot ko. He guided me hanggang sa makaupo ako.

"Hmmm, don't order I prepared foods for us. Just wait, i-seserve na nila." sabi ko nang makaupo na rin siya sa harapan ko.

"You cook?" he asked.

Excitedly I nodded twice. "I hope you will like it."

"Here's your special luch na, Kairra." mula sa aking likuran ay narinig kong saad ni ate Sam.

Mabilis akong napaikot upang balingan sila sa aking likuran. Ate Sam is with Jet and Tina who's carrying the foods I cooked.

"Enjoy your foods, Sir, miss Kairra." anila matapos maiayos ang mga putaheng niluto ko bago umalis agad.

Though, ate Sam gave me a teasing look while leaving. Hindi ko na lamang siya pinansin, binalik ang atensyon sa lalaking nasa aking harapan.

"Hmmm, I don't know what foods you wants that's why I cooked these foods. This one is spicy steak, one of my favorite dishes." nginitian ko siya habang nakaturo sa steak. "While this one is veal parmigiana my special italian dish. And there's also vegetables salad and of course rice and my favorite pasta! I hope you will like it all." masaya kong saad habang tinuturo isa-isa ang mga putahe.

"Let's see. Can I get some now?" tanong niya, bahagyang nakaangat ang gilid ng labi habang nakatingin sa akin.

"Yes, of course!" I said happily.

Sinimulan niyang kumuha sa steak and I thought he will going to put it on his plate but he put it on mine. Awang ang bibig kong bumaling sa kaniya.

"It's fine. Kuha ka na ng sayo." I want him to taste it now and see what his reaction.

I hope he will like it!

Hindi parin ako sumusubo maski isang kutsara dahil abala sa paninitig sa kaniya habang nilalagyan ang kaniyang plato. Atat ng matikma niya ito. I didn't blink nang unti-unti na siyang sumubo sa halip ay napaayos ako sa aking upuan, nag-aantay sa kaniyang magiging reaksyon.

How it taste kaya para sa kaniya?

"It taste good." aniya matapos matikman ang spicy steak ko.

"Talaga?" masaya kong tanong. "You're not joking?"

"It really taste good." pang-uulit niya pa. "Kumain ka na." aniya.

"Just taste first this one. And tell me how was it." excited kong saad sabay lahad sa veal parmigiana.

Masaya ko siyang nilagyan sa kaniyang plato habang ramdam ko naman ang paninitig niya sa akin. Nagpatuloy lamang ako at hindi na inintindi ang paninitig niya dahil sa excitement ko.

"Eat your food now." aniya muli.

"Just this one, kakain na ako." ngiti ko sa kaniya.

"Your cook will always taste good." he said, sounds really sure.

I scowled. "Huh?" napatango ako. "Just try it now." saad ko na lamang dahil hindi alam ang sinasabi niya.

Pinanood ko muli siyang tikman ang veal parmigiana habang tila nagliliwanag ang aking mata sa kakapanood at kakaantay sa kaniyang sasabihin.

"It's really taste good too." aniya matapos matikman. "Masarap lahat ng luto mo, Kairra." dagdag niya pa sa malumanay na boses.

Hindi na mawala ang malaking ngiti sa aking labi. "Let's eat na ngarod!" I declared excitedly.

Masaya akong sumubo ng dalawang beses. Napabaling ako sa kaniya nang maramdaman ang paninitig niya sa akin. He didn't say anything, he's just keep staring at me. While I feel again the excitement and pleasure inside me.

I always don't notice how happy I am everytime I'm with him. He didn't say or do anything yet, just those his simple words but it has a huge impact inside me.

This is something I doesn't want to change about me anymore. Because even in his small things he could makes my heart flicked. This is my unstoppable feelings when it comes to him.

*************

Let time gradually pass and let wrong situation came into our lives even how hard it was. Siguro'y, maraming sitwasyon ang ating sinubukan ngunit mas maraming tayong inaayawan. But let us know that this wrong situation will never turn rights when we didn't face it.

Let's face every circumstances that will come into our lives.

Let's welcome them!

"Did you had a hard time cooking these?" Darrow asked in the middle of our meal.

Ang tinutukoy niya ay ang aming pagkain ngayon. I sipped on my glass first before I turned to him to answer him.

"Hmmm, a little." taka kong sagot.

He sighed heavily. "Next time don't cook for me." aniya.

"Huh? Why?" naguguluhan kong tanong. "Hindi ba masarap? You don't like it? Hmmm... but you said it's taste good?"

"Gusto ko lahat." he said softly. "I don't want you having a hard time. You're not completely well."

Tumamlay ang timpla ko sa dahilan niya. "I think hindi mo lang talaga nagustuhan ang luto ko. Just admit it, you know it's fine—"

"Gustong-gusto ko. I'm just worried about your condition—"

"No, hindi mo lang talaga nagustuhan ang luto ko." malungkot kong putol sa kaniya bago binaba ang ulo. "Ayos lang. I will practice more para mas sumarap." ako pilit na pinasigla ang boses.

He sighed heavily, but he didn't say anything.

"C'mon, you should eat more. May work ka pa." nag-angat at ng tingin at nginitian siya. "Baka malate ka n'yan."

I continue eating happily while the man in front of me stayed silent, he didn't touch his food again. Patuloy parin ako sa pagkain nang maramdaman ko ang paninitig niya sa akin. Tila pinapanood ang lahat ng aking galaw if there's something wrong about me.

Ngumunguya akong nag-angat ng tingin sa kaniya. Binigyan ko siya ng malaking ngiti nang mahagip ko ang plato niya. He's not yet done eating his food, napapangalahatian niya pa lamang ang puno niyang plato seems he can't finish all the foods on his plate.

Hmmm, maybe he really don't like my cooked, huh? It's fine, though. What I cooked was fine naman but maybe hindi pumasa sa kaniya ang luto ko. Maybe, I need more practice so I can cook more better that he will going to like next time.

"I will practice more para pagnagluto muli ako ay magustuhan mo na. You can order another meal, instead. It's okay if you can't eat all the foods on your plate—"

"That's not what I mean—"

"It's okay, Darrow." seryoso kong saad ngunit nagawa parin siyang ngitian. "I will just going to finish my foods so I can accompany you pababa. May trabaho ka pa." dagdag ko.

Nagpatuloy muli ako sa pagkain, pilit na binalewala ang panonood niya sa akin. I'm full already but I want to eat more. Sayang naman ang niluto ko, buti at hindi masyadong marami. I would let ate Sam taste it later so she can tell me kung may kulang ba sa lasa o kung nasobrahan para alam ko kung anong aayusin.

Nang maubos ang pagkain sa aking plato ay nagpasya pa akong magsalin. Aabutin ko pa lamang ang veal parmigiana but Darrow got it first, and I thought he will going to put some veal parmigiana on my plate but I was wrong. Gulat ako nang salinan niya ang sariling plato at halos wala ng itira pang veal parmigiana para sa akin.

"Huh, wala na sa akin?" nag-angat ako ng tingin gamit ang namumungay na mga mata.

"Marami ka ng nakain kaonti pa lang ang aking. I thought you cooked it for me?" aniya pagkatapos ay sumubo agad ng dalawang beses.

Awang ang bibig kong pinanood siya. He shouldn't eat it if he doesn't want to! Kung napipilitan lamang siya dahil nag-effort ako it's fine! Binigyan ko siya ng masamang tingin ngunit hindi niya ako pinansin dahil nagpatuloy na siya sa pagkain.

"Yeah, but you don't like it naman—"

He cut me off quickly. "You cooked it for me, definitely it's all mine now." he said.

"Huh... you say, you don't like what I cooked—"

"I didn't say that."

"But that's what you mean." saad ko hanggang patuloy siyang pinapanood na abala sa pagkain.

He stopped eating and he lifted up his gaze. Our eyes meet quickly. Namungay ang mata ko nang malambot na tingin ang binaling niya sa akin.

"I'm worried about you. I don't want you to have a hard time, that's all I mean." he then said seriously.

His voice was too serious but it was opposite of his eyes the way he gives me stare, it's too soft as cotton.

"I really do like all of these. Kaya kong ubusin ang lahat ng ito hindi lang dahil ikaw ang nagluto kung hindi dahil gustong-gusto ko." he added seriously, but his voice was soft.

I quickly bit my lips. Couldn't say any words while he made my heart beat too fast because of what he mouthed.

Shocks! Why he needs to be that soft!

"Lahat siguro'y magugustuhan ang luto mo. It's really taste good. I hope you won't cooked for another man, just for me."

"H-uh? B-akit naman?" agad na napakagat sa labi dahil sa kahihiyan dulot ng pagka-utal na tanungin siya.

He smirked. "Because I deserve it!"

I opened my mouth but not words came out. I just shut it quickly, can't say anything! Nakakahiya, masyado akong nagugulat sa mga salitang lumalabas sa bibig niya. I couldn't get used to him!

My heart always flicked everytime he do things or says words that I didn't expect!

Hindi na siya sinagot at nagpatuloy na ako sa pagkain. And instead to get some veal parmigiana I just get my favorite pasta dahil mabilis niya ng nilagay sa kaniyang plato ang lahat na veal parmigiana. And when he finished the veal parmigiana he started eating next all the spicy steak and vegetables salad.

Mangha ko na lamang siyang pinanood na ubusin ang lahat ng luto ko. Nang matapos na siya at nakapagpahinga na ay agad na akong nagyayang tumayo dahil kailangan niya pang bumalik sa trabaho. When I mentioned about his works he sighed deeply, seems he's having a hard time and doesn't want to stand yet.

"Your work is waiting for you." paalala ko when he said that he will going to stay a few minutes more.

Wala na siyang nagawa nang lumapit ako sa kaniya at hinila siya sa kamay. Tryna lifting him up but he's too heavy! Ngunit hindi niya naman na ako pinahirap at tumayo na rin agad pero hindi niya na binitawan pa ang aking kamay.

I'm taking back my hands but he just gives me arched eyebrows and smirks while I felt his hand hold mine more tighten.

Hanggang sa makarating kami sa baba palabas sa glass door ay hawak niya parin ang aking kamay. Ramdam ko na ang pamumula ng aking mukha dahil bawat server na nakakapansin sa amin ay nagtatagal ang titig sa amin lalo na sa akin. I just wanted to be swallowed by the ground because of the embarrassment I felt! I'm not ashamed because of him. I'm ashamed because I couldn't face my server especially manager Sam with my red face like a tomatoes!

I couldn't even walk confidently!

Hindi ko alam kung anong itsura ko but I'm sure isn't good. Ramdam ko ang sobrang pang-iinit ng aking mukha while the man beside me who's holding my hand was too calm while walking elegantly!

Hinigit ko ang aking kamay mula sa pagkakahawak niya nang makarating na sa labas ng restaurant. Taas ang kilay niya nang bumaling sa akin.

"H-uh, you should go. Late ka na sa trabaho." ako, iwas ang mukha sa kaniya dahil ramdam parin ang pang-iinit nito.

He sighed helplessly. "Take care here. Text me when something came up."

"Yeah." tugon ko. "Go now, you're late na. I will be fine here... and, huh, good luck sa work mo."

Nakangiti ako ngunit sinadya kong sa dibdib niya lamang tumingin hindi sa mga mata niya. I don't even mind kung magmukha akong tanga na nakangiting nakatingin sa kaniya dibdib!

"Take care sa pagdrive." paalala ko pa.

He sighed helplessly again. "Yeah." aniya at naramdaman ko ang kamay niyang humaplos sa aking pisngi upang mailagay sa likod ng tenga ang takas na buhok.

I freeze because of his soft touch. Wala na akong masabi hanggang sa tuluyan na siyang nagpaalam at umalis. Nagtagal pa ako ng ilang minuto sa labas, bahagyang pinikit ang mata at dinadama parin ang paghaplos niya kahit wala na. I always feel new inside me every time I am with him.