Never Will I Ever

Ep.2 | The party

I settled in a black pants and a grey silk top, yes my sense of fashion. Walking into the school hall very early as usual thanks to my mom.

Since it was early I decided to go wait in class, fortunately I had literature which I loved due to the double meaning it gave to everything, it was more analytic, made me think critically and it helped my mind relax. I think literature gave me insights into things.

I got to class hoping there would be someone around, there was not. I sat in the second seat just gently placing my head on the desk. Maybe it was a bad idea to be left alone but I preferred that to anything. My mind drifted off to the abuse that had now become a routine for me. At times it was so hard on me, I felt depressed, numb and didn't care what happened. Yes, the thought of killing myself had navigated though.

I was done proving myself, I was through being the good Lena, the good daughter, the good friend! Always free of troubles. They couldn't see through the heart that was stamped upon more than a million times! The heart that was bleeding sorrow and pain!

Ding! Ding!

The bell went off bringing me back to class thank goodness. Gifty sat next to me giving me the look that said we're talking after class, don't dare Walk out on me.

Class went on smoothly as expected until I stumbled on my way out

"Didn't I tell you to wait for me?" I turned as she crossed her hands on her chest in a challenging manner

 I sighed obviously giving up "So why- why do I get such heavenly treatment from you this evening"?

"Well my dear Lena, if you've been reading our messages you'd get the understanding that you bummed into walker yesterday at the cafeteria" She said giving me her plastic smile

"Okay dear caring friend what the hell has that got to do with me? If I bumped into some stupid walker who I clearly don't give a damn about"

Right now I was just tired hearing that name Gifty keeps ranting about.

"Look gift I love you and I love that you are trying to get me updated and blah but please don't rattle about stupid walker and to hell with some party I don't care"

I finished up thanking my stars that she didn't cut me off or try to interrupt me even though I must admit I was surprised she could actually shut up and hear me share my opinion on this walker subject.

I snapped at her "hey gift!" She literally zoned out on me and here I thought she actually listened

"Gifty?!"

Fine I turned to see what had my friend in a daze.

Oh! Julia's son, interesting.

He walked over to us, more like me. He started to count his fingers whilst looking at me sternly

He pointed his index finger at me “stupid? This is the word you used in describing me?" He said more like a question.

"Umm, Emmanuel" I saw the surprise evident on his face when I said his name but then he smirked.

"I was not talking about you even though that would be the exact words and more I would use in addressing you so now please shoot" I gestured my hands in a dismissal manner waiting for him to take his que and leave but he moved closer, more closely this time Like a meter away from my face. I could literally smell him. I was literally smelling a guy this close!

"Lena Brooke, the name is Emmanuel walker, For the third time Lena thank your Stars you're a girl" and with that he left me standing rooted with my jaw dropped.

On earth?

To say I recovered from the shock immediately was a lie, it took me three damn minutes!

I turned to see my good friend still in shock, well someone needs to come back to reality.

Gifty turned to me apparently still in shock "Y-you know Walker? Goodness he said your name!"

"Well I guess, why are you acting like you met Beyoncé?" I asked a little irritated at her reaction over some boy

"Lena! You've been keeping things from me"

"No, I really didn't know Emmanuel was Walker I cross by nose! I just got to know him yesterday because he just moved in my neighborhood and mom had to give a peace offering"

A gaps escaped from her lips "you called him by his first name? Nobody does that! only his boy packs can do that " She said now horrified.

"And you can’t cross your nose!"

"I don't know, and boy packs? They are not werewolves Gifty" She eventually left it, thank heavens!

School went on in the usual stressful way till the bell saved the day. My twenty-minutes’ walk of was successful. I got home tired but God I knew better. I quickly changed into something comfortable and started to clean the house.

I did the morning dishes and all that I didn't make, cleaned the cabinet, washed the floors and scrub the washroom.

I was now sweating like I just got caught up in the Rain. After doing all my chores I headed back to my room to shower, taking a quick shower I went down to prepare dinner. In Ghana rice dominated, it was like the second Christmas meal next to our traditional meal fufu.

I prepared rice and stew. now it was my brother and I.

I did the feeding and bathing, thankful he slept Few hours after, I resigned to bed thinking of how my life would have been if I was from a loving and caring family. The one that will try to understand me, the one who wouldn’t make me grow before my age, ones whom I would be able to enjoy my teenage years like the rest of the kids.

Maybe, just maybe my life would have been better, maybe I'd be loved and appreciated.

 I didn't realize I was crying till I felt the tears brush my cheeks. no Lena. Please be strong.

 I dried up the tears and slowly drifted to sleep where I didn't have to go through the phase of telling my life story.

Weekends! aww how I loved them. It was when I got to sleep in late, yes late and when say late I mean 8:am!

jeez! I still didn't see the benefits of having a morning person in your abode especially when the person is your mother, clearly my sleep was being controlled.

In my home a girl can't sleep more than 7hours because according to my mom it means you're lazy and lazy people are always at a disadvantage then again, I don't mind working all day but I mind my sleep! One of the many reasons I am determined to go to college.

Thankfully I managed to do all chores before 12 noon meaning I could sleep again. exhausted as I was I had to shower. ever heard the phrase bathing is medicine?

Well they didn’t lie. I fell on my comfy bed closing my eyes to meet the darkness that came along with it.

               ********************************

Mom burst into my room holding a bat in hand, I couldn't comprehend what was going on or what I had done but I knew what was coming and I had to plead for her to stop.

"Mom please, I didn't mean to, I was - I don't know" I shield myself from the impending pain

"You want everyone to think I’m the bad guy? how ungrateful! what did I even do to have you crying around like that!

She hit me with the bat again, this time sending me to the floor. I wanted to scream but I knew screaming would just intensity her actions and satisfy her purpose. I kept ranting in my head that it was going to be over soon, a little pain won’t cause damage. But before the pain could subdue she hit me in the stomach sending shocks to places I had never imagined could electrocute.

"Maa Please " I pleaded with every sobbing heavily. I couldn't stop the tears no matter how I tried. even though I wanted to plead more, it became hard to talk.

"SHUT UP AND WIPE THOSE TEARS!” she screamed at me frightening me the more. I quickly wiped my teary face vigorously frustrated my mistake could lead to another misery

"WIPE IT LENA! LENA!

My eyes flew open and landed on a horrified Gifty

"Gi_

"Shh,"she cut me off before I could talk

"It's okay, I’m here, nothing is wrong okay? nothing will happen to you."

I couldn't hold it any longer, I let the tears have its way. I was tired, tired of smiling, tired of holding up like everything was perfectly fine.

"I can't, I can't gift I’m tired "

"Don't speak, just let it go" she said smiling at me but I didn't fail to notice the moist in her eyes. I knew she felt for me. After letting it all out It occurred to me why she was here.

"Erm, how? I mean why did you come?" Well I didn't ask how because it's Gifty, she walks into my house without knocking. Nah, she is convinced she's part of the family hence no need for formal ways

"I came to get you ready, and I saw you curled up in your bed crying. I thought you were just crying but I noticed you were asleep so maybe a bad dream." she said the last part with a sad smile

"I’m fine, don't worry" I said trying to convince her, more like myself. anyways I knew I would be fine.

"It's just a dream okay"?

"Lena, I wish it was just a dream. I don't like this, you- you're just too good for this! It's affecting you already! just because your dad is cheating doesn't give your mom the qual-"

"Stop it I said I am fine. It's just a dream nothing more!" I snapped at her

 "You can't speak of my family like that, not now not ever..."

"Okay, I am sorry"

There was a long silence. I didn't feel like talking anymore.

"Dress up! We'll be late!"

"Huh Late? Why?" I asked confusion clearly drawn on my face

Gifty rolled her eyes and gave me a bored look.

"We're going to a party Miss Brooke." She said going into my closet. And then I remembered!

"The party's today? " I asked unsure

"Nope, it's yesterday, now this dress would do" she pulled out a straight shoulder lean dress my Aunt gifted me on my birthday.

"I’m not wearing that! It's practically my christmas dress! I can't risk it for some dump party which I’m not even going case closed!"

"You are going with me. it's just a block away plus he's your neighbor! Please just accompany me”

"Fine!"

I was currently standing at the familiar gate unwilling again with lots of teenagers half drunk and the making out.

"Come on let's go have some fun!" Gifty pulled me into the familiar hallways.

I saw some friends and met new people I didn't want to speak to which I did thanks to walker and his stupid idea of a party. Clearly I was done with mingling, I decided to get myself a cup of water until I dumped into a wall.

How many Walls are there in this house?

"Look who decided to have fun?" And Why did the voice sound familiar?

I raised my head meeting a pair of blue eyes wearing a smirk.

"Wow, the host himself, you know if you hadn't gone through the trouble of inviting everyone I would have been saved the trouble of coming" I said faking a smile.

"You're welcome to leave anytime. This party was for the likes of you to have a chance you know"

"What the hell? What do you think you are! back off" just when I was about leaving a strong force hit me to the wall

Damn my back!

I met an angry walker "You don't walk out on me!"

 I felt my back hit against the wall. The pain sprang across my body almost collapsing me

"s**t! You don't have to be fragile"

Really? Fragile?

"I am not fragile " He looked at me like some hard equation he was trying to solve.

"Come, I have some cold balm"

Wait! he wanted to help me? He didn't mean to hurt me?

“Why?"

"Why?" His eyebrows drew together clearly giving out his state of confusion.

 "You are hurt"

"You didn't mean to hurt me?" Well it came out more like a surprise than a question.

He hesitated to answer "What's wrong with you? why would I hurt you on purpose? I thought I made myself clear Lena, I don't hit girls"

He took me bridal style, gosh and I thought I'd never have this moment.

He took me to his room. To his room!

"Emmanuel, just because my back aches don’t mean I'm vulnerable for you to take advantage of. Get me out of here this minute! I’m not having s*x with you, if you're s*x starved there are a lot of horny teenagers out there waiting for you!" I snapped

He seemed surprised at my outburst at first, then the asshole began to laugh

He moved closer breathing on my face. How's that possible, is his breath supposed to fan my face? Am I supposed to like the chills? Is it even normal? Why am I quite too?

He leaned in more this time almost touching my lips with his.

"Babe, taking you would be the last thing on my list, I have my preferences. I like them hot"

He said moving away from me. well that was something.

He got a balm from his drawer and started to take out its contents.

"Aright lift your dress”. I heard him say

"Excuse me Lift what dress? ha! And here I thought I wasn't in your preference list! I'll pass"

"You know; a lot of girls would kill for this. Enjoy whilst it last" he said with a smug expression and I wanted nothing more than to punch that face.

"I'll pass"

"As you wish but I suggest you rest, that would help subdue the pain"

I let out a sign of relief I didn't know I was holding.

"Thank you" I muttered.

For a long time now someone who hurt me was helping me. I was surprised. After getting beaten up I would have to take care of the bruise myself and It felt oddly nice for someone to willingly help, even though I didn't allow it. I thought counted.

Walker left after a minute of hesitation with a stupid excuse that I may steal something of his if he left me alone in his room. stupid walker!

I lay on his bed, yeah he insisted. it was very soft and comfortable, the mattress was big, bigger than mine off course! let out a yawn embracing the warmth his bed gave me before I found myself in a distant world.