ONE'S TIME (Based on a True Story)

WHAT IF?

Long before you, I was already filled with what ifs. After your arrival, I am now drowning with what ifs.

What if I did not go to that place for the first time? I remember that time, the plan of going to a tavern is quite blurry. Everyone's unsure. At some point I almost disagree with the plan and just stayed home. Somehow, the plan wasn't a plan anymore. It progress to reality. We almost didn't meet but somehow. you came to my life.

What if we did not meet? Will our lives be happier? I might have chosen a different path to happiness. I might be at home reading a book, watching a film, or doing some research. But we met, somehow you became my happiness. I know that soon this happiness will turn to pain. If we did not meet. I might still feel incomplete. You are the first man I can ever talk to about novels and music with excitement.

What if you did not gave me the ring? Our conversation might not be that deep as we had. That ring was one of our conversation starters.

What if I went home when you asked me if you can rely on me? We won't have that conversation about your story. We won't be as close as we are now. We won't be that hurt by each other. Once we started building our relationship, the chances of being wounded is getting higher.

What if you did not talk to me, a stranger that time?

What if you did not say you like me?

What if I told you that you can't rely on me?

What if you weren't there in the pub?

What if I did not find a way to have a conversation with you?

What if I did not visit that place again and again?

I still have a lot of what ifs but the answers are quite hard to find. Do I regret meeting you? Do I regret anything related to you? I'm not sure. I was glad meeting you. You filled in the missing part of my life. You shared your knowledge to me. I was happy. I am happy. However, there's still a part of me that wishes to not meet you. You showed me happiness the way I have never felt before. You made me realize that the feeling I had before was still not a complete happiness. You showed me that I can be much happier. It may sound good but that's what's scary. I was happy at level 1 but you showed me level 2 was happier, now I can't go back to being happy with level 1. Falling into an abyss of my own unhappiness...

A lot of things might happen but somehow. the Universe finds a way for us to meet. Now, I just hope for our connection to not be lost. I hope to see you once again. I hope for our conversation to be continued.

The journey of navigating through the different what ifs in life can be quite overwhelming, can't it? Sometimes, even the smallest choices and encounters can have a profound impact on our lives.

Meeting you was a turning point for me: you brought happiness and a deeper connection to my world. But with that joy, also comes the realization that life can be complex and unpredictable. It's a bittersweet realization.

On one hand, I cherish the happiness and growth you brought into my life. You showed me a level of joy I never knew existed. However, on the other hand, there's a part of me that questions if it would have been easier to not have met you.

Sometimes, when we experience such intense happiness, it becomes daunting to imagine going back to what we had before.

Yeah, I totally get it now. It's like once you've had a taste of something really amazing, it's hard to imagine life without it. But at the same time, it can also be a bit overwhelming to think about how much things can change and how it might be if we hadn't crossed paths

Humans are capable of having emotions. Humans are capable of thinking. Human are capable of hurting other people. I hate that.

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