Lake of Sorrows

Fuzzy Feelings

It's been a few days since the dining hall incident. I can’t seem to get over the pain I have cost so many. It’s become easier to stay in bed and hide from everyone, including Marcus. Marcus can't stand it, he tries to come in and talk but it falls on deaf ears I’m lost in my world of guilt, I don't want to look at anyone the pain I still feel is very raw and I am just not ready. My table that sits in my bedroom corner is filled with snacks and meals that have gone untouched even though my belly rumbles. I have yet to understand all this fairy stuff, that's been thrown at me. It doesn't help that Amanda hasn't returned to visit so I could ask her more questions. I wonder if Marcus would let me have a laptop, at least for me to do more research on this world I'm forced to live in. Maybe I should try to get up and go ask him.

* Isabella enters Marcus's room to find a strange man standing in the doorway.*

“Um excuse me, where is Marcus?” The guy looks up at me but doesn't say a word. He just continues to work on the doorway like I never spoke to him. Ok then “Marcus where are you, Marrrrrrccccccus!” I decide to yell at the top of my lungs, I am sure he of all people will hear me. The man in the doorway eyes goes big, not expecting me to break out in a scream for being ignored.  Marcus comes rushing out of his bathroom in just a towel, water dripping down, the most perfect abs I have ever laid eyes on.

 “Bella, are you ok? What's wrong?” He grabs a hold of me tightly, trying to check if I was hurt. I keep my eyes pointed towards the ground, so Marcus can't see how red my face is starting to get,” Isabella answer me now, are you ok?” Oh umm, I came out of my room to ask you something and seen a stranger in the doorway and you weren't here, so I panicked and thought that if I yelled you would find me.” Flustered is an understatement.  Marcus lets out a sigh of relief,” well, your right, I found you.” I hear Marcus talking but I am truly mesmerized by his abs, I mean yes I knew he was hot and all, but I wasn't expecting all of this. Marcus looks down and notices that he is in front of me in only a towel, “Hold that thought, Bella one second, I need to get dressed.” He disappears into his closet for just a second before walking out with just a pair of sweatpants. 

Dear lord, is this man trying to kill me?  “My Isabella, are you checking me out?” The laugh that follows was deep, almost husky sounding and oh did it make me feel things. I went to look up into his eyes and my heart. I never noticed how gorgeous his eyes hazel eyes were. “Um, I well, I kind of forgot what I walked in here for. Um, I think I need to just go back to my room to Umm yeah.” I am stunned and don't know why I am mumbling like a madwoman, but a quick exit would be nice. I needed to catch my

 breathe and rethink what I was doing.” Hold on Bella I haven't seen you in days you look tinier than normal, something we don't need. Why don't I order us some food, you can go get cleaned up, then we can talk? By the time you make it back, the guys will be gone and I can show you some new features to our room.”  I just nod and head to my room, embarrassed.

 What the hell just happened? Why do I have these butterflies in my stomach? I quickly get in the shower to get cleaned up, change my clothes, and head back into Marcus's room.  I walked in right as Max entered the room with our food. “Hello, Miss Isabella, I have missed seeing you around lately. I hope everything is well with you now.” It surprised me that Max would even want to talk to me after the feeding frenzy I caused. I was sure he lost some friends and it was all my fault. A tear slips from my eye before I could even stop myself. I quickly turned to leave, not ready to face the damage that I cost. “ Oh Miss Isabella I am truly sorry I didn't mean to misspeak, please forgive me. I have truly missed seeing your smile.” 

Marcus started to growl in the corner, enraged about the situation in front of him. By now the tears are freely falling as I look up at Max to respond“Max how can you be so nice to me, I caused you to lose friends, because of me I caused the whole staff to go into lockdown. Making them scared that they would be the next meal, I made everyone's life a bigger hell than it already was. I don't see how you are standing there and honestly worried about my safety. It just doesn’t seem like it is fair for you to be worried about little ole me.” I stare at my feet, not wanting to see Max’s reaction.

 Marcus comes towards me and grabs my hand to bring me into a tight hug." Isabella is that what has bothered you so much these last few days? Are you blaming yourself over a group of vampires who choose to cave in to their cravings?” He tucks his finger under my chin to make me look up into his eyes.” I need you to listen to me love and listen closely, yes you made a mistake, but that mistake wasn't done intentionally you didn't wake up trying to plan who would get killed that morning. The only blame can be put on the vampires that took those lives, do you understand me? I stay quiet and just nod, Marcus, turns to Max,” Thank you, Max, that will be all I think me and Bella have a lot to talk about.” Max looks at me and bows,” Good night Miss Isabella, I hope to see you soon. Night sir, call if you need me” 

 “Come, Bella, let's get some food in you so we can talk. Ok?” I follow him to the table out on the balcony, I never realized what a beautiful view he has up here. The forest below us is simply unbelievable, it goes on for miles. “Marcus it's gorgeous out here, I forgot how much I miss seeing the night sky, it seems like forever ago that I got to look up and see the actual stars.” I continue to stare up at the night sky, getting lost in my thoughts once again. The cool breeze moved my hair ever so slightly. “I get it, I truly do Isabella. It is like being trapped in a cage not being able to do just your daily normal and for that, I truly am sorry. You never asked for any of this, you were just thrown into this world. If there is anything I can do to make you a little more comfortable or to just feel safer, you just have to ask and it is yours.”

Right then is when I realized what I originally came to ask for. “Oh, that reminds me, Marcus, I was going to ask if there is any way for me to have a computer. I was curious about this world and figured the easiest route would be to just do my own research online. If that was ok, I mean it would make a pretty sweet Late birthday gift!” “Wait, Isabella, when was your birthday? Why didn't you say anything?” Marcus's voice rose as he spoke like I should have made him aware of it. We could have gone to the village and done something. You are a pet my dear, not a slave, you will always get the best treatment. You just have to ask, with that said I need you to be up early and we will go get it, does that sound like a plan Love?” The smile paired with the way he is looking at me makes the butterflies return, It makes me shift in my seat at the feeling it is giving me. I try to change the subject before I embarrass myself again,” So tell me about the guy from earlier, what was he doing to your door?

“Oh, that's a security system I got installed to make sure no one can get into our rooms. Max also was adamant to have some of his men on this floor to further assist in protecting you during the time you cannot be with me. The system works by scanning your handprints, which is great for me. It makes it to where I can see who comes in and at what time. Tomorrow, while you're gone, cameras will be installed in the bedrooms as an extra precaution.”  Marcus continued explaining the ends and outs of everything being installed, and I couldn't help but feel like my room was about to be more of a jail than it was before. I couldn't help but to worry," Um Marcus if there are cameras in our rooms how will we um have any privacy you know to change and such? “

 I don't think I have ever seen a vampire turn redder when he realized what I was asking about. He chokes on the wine he was drinking on,” Oh s**t Bella I didn't even think about that um I did at least say no cameras in your bathroom or closets so you'll be safe to change in those two rooms and as for cameras in your room, I can make sure it isn't pointed towards your bed so you don't have to feel that closely watched, but the cameras are important to keep you safe. I won't be able to take you everywhere with me and leaving you here without me terrifies me, even more, love the cameras are just something you will have to get used to and that isn’t up for discussion.” I sat there trapped in my thoughts for a few minutes, I had no choice in the matter. If I wanted to stay alive, it would just have to be something else that I got used to. “As long as you take me out of this castle as much as you can I won't argue, I’ll do as you ask if you feel this will make me safer.” The grin that formed on his face was mesmerizing, I caught myself staring once again. 

“Good, I am glad you see it my way Lil One. l Bella since dinner is done. Would you like to watch a movie with me? You have been in your bed too much these last few days and honestly, I would like to spend the night with my pet curled up next to me. If that's ok, you?” He spoke it in a hushed voice, with each word drawled out, thinking that I might reject the offer. Instead, I got excited and squealed. I haven't watched a movie since before my parents passed. Aunt Margret thought that TV and movies were a waste of money and poisoned the brain, so I couldn't be more excited.

 Marcus handed me the TV remote and told me to find something to watch on Netflix while he called Max to bring us some snacks for the movie. I couldn't help but laugh at the first movie series that popped up on the watch list. There is no way in hell that Marcus has watched all the cheesy Twilight movies. As he walked into the rooms, his eyes met the TV, then turned to me red once again. “I got curious, Bella, they were boring and couldn't make it through the first one.” 

I couldn't keep the laugh in because Marcus was stuttering trying to explain why he watched the movies.” Marcus tell me, do you sparkle in the sunlight like a troll that's rolled into glitter.” The image in itself made me snort. Marcus came storming at me, looking mischievous. “That's it Lil One you're going to get it.” he pounced on me straddling me to the bed, oh was he strong he had both my hands above my head held down with one of his hands the other he used to tickle me,” No Marcus no I'm sorry I won't compare you to a shiny troll I tape out I tape out!” My squeals get louder and breather as he continues. “Marcus I'll be good I'll be good I promise I quit you are going to make me pee.” Marcus was proud, he just found out I was very ticklish and would cave in a heartbeat. At the end of the night, I ended up cuddling with Marcus just as he wanted and turning on “The Blood-Red Sky”. It didn't take long with him running his fingers through my hair and I was in a deep sleep once again.