My Puppy Love (COMPLETED)

CHAPTER 10 - Our First Date

I don't know what time I fell asleep last night. It's already 10:00 AM and I'm still here on my bed, Our house help knock on my door at 8:00 AM for our breakfast but I told her that I'm not feeling well which is true. I'm NOT REALLY FEELING WELL. I'm so anxious that I cannot sleep. Why didn't he answered back?! He could've at least told me something right. Like an assurance perhaps that everything is fine.

I heard a knock on the door again. Maybe it's our house help again to ask me to eat since I know that dad is in the provincial office already to work while mom is visiting my aunt.

"Yaya, I'm not yet hungry." I said dryly. Then, I covered my face with a pillow.

"But Ms. Leila, Sir Alex left something downstairs." I instantly jump off my bed. Alex was here?! I ran to open my door. my heart is beating so fast due to excitement. 

"Alex was here?" I asked our house help ecstatically.

"Yes Ms. Leila, he was waiting for you to go down but you said you're not feeling well. He actually ate breakfast with your parents. He just left." she said while scratching her head.

"You should have told me that Alex was here!" I'm getting frustrated now. I pace back and forth inside my room to calm myself. What could be the reason for his visit? This is a rare case. Then I remembered something.

"You said he left something for me, where is it?" I cannot calm myself now.

"It's in the living room." She replied quite confused about my reaction. 

I almost run down the stairs to find what he left for me. I found a bouquet of sunflower on the table. I frantically look for a card. Gotcha! It has a card. I carefully opened it. I'm very nervous right now. My heart is about to explode.

"We have to talk. I'll pick you up later at 6:00 PM." -Alex

And that's it. I felt my legs slowly melting down. I sat on the sofa. Is he trying to break off the engagement this time? I looked at the beautiful flowers on the table, if he is, with these flowers, he's too cruel.

*****

I received a text message from Alex around 5:00 PM asking me if I'm ready. Yes physically, I am. But emotionally?! Well, I'm not so sure about that. 

I still managed to fix myself despite the chaos that I am having inside my head. I wore a peach flowy dress and nude heels. I applied a night makeup to cover my eyebags. Thanks for the sleepless night last night. At around 5:45 PM I'm already waiting in our living room. I didn't have to wait for too long. Five minutes before 6:00 PM, he arrived to pick me up.

 I tried to ask him where we're headed to, but he said it was a surprise. I observed that he's acting really strange which makes me very uneasy. I just pray that my suspicion is wrong. I was surprised when he brought me to their farm. He guided me towards their flower garden. My jaw almost dropped on the ground the moment I saw the candlelight dinner set up beside the lake. Lanterns of lights are all over the tree which lightens up the whole place. It looks so magical! Petals of red roses served as a red carpet towards our table. There are waiters waiting for us, and a violinist on the corner.

I'm speechless. I'm not expecting this at all. Actually far from what I am expecting. I looked at him in my with so much emotions that I cannot trust myself if I can put them into words perfectly. 

"W-what is this?" I asked almost teary-eyed. My heart is overwhelmed. When he said last night that we'll just talk. I've never imagined that he meant a romantic dinner by the lake.

"I realized that we never had any proper date for the last five years. I decided to give it to you tonight. I hope this is okay." he said while staring at me intently like I'm the most beautiful woman in the world.

"This is more than okay love! I love it."I cannot contain my happiness at all. He smiled tenderly.

"I'm glad that you loved it. In that case, shall we?" he offered his arm for me to hold on to which I gladly accepted. We slowly walked on the red petal while the violinist started playing "The One" by Kodaline. I cannot fully express what I feel. I feel like I'm walking on cloud nine. The waiter moved my chair for me to sit down. Then Alex occupied the other seat. 

"Love this is too much!" Until now, I cannot believe my eyes. I totally forgot about my failed proposal last night. Everything here is perfect!

"You deserve this love. There are lots of things that I need to explain. I owe you all this." he held my hand on the table. 

The waiters started serving us food and filling up our glasses with wine.

"But for now, let's eat first okay?" I just nod.

We ate our food happily. I've never enjoyed my food this much before. This is indeed a night to remember.

We're done eating. I'm so full. So we decide to walk hand in hand. Squeezing each other's hand from time to time. We didn't speak, we just feel the evening breeze, our music is the sounds coming from the insects, gentle blowing of winds and calm movement of water on the lake. I feel so calm and contented. We then sit on a rattan chair near the lake.

"I can't believe that we're actually together now, acting like a real couple." he said shyly afterward.

"Me too." I said sincerely. Deep in my heart, I know that I mean every word that I said. 

"You don't know how long I've been waiting for you. For the past fifteen years, your lovely face has been haunting me every night, but what can I do, were basically kids then, especially you. I need to stop myself from contacting you. First and foremost, because I want you to grow, despite your marriage proposal when were nine years old. I want you to mature until you finally realize that it was not just puppy love, that it's actually real love." he chuckled maybe remembering our childhood.  I was stunned by his revelation. I cannot speak. My heart in pounding so hard against my chest. He focused his eyes on the lake. Maybe reminiscing the past.

"You never left my heart and mind you know. And then, 5 years ago, I saw you again. More mature, prettier, smarter, but still the girl I love. But you seem a bit distant. It frightened me. But when your dad announced our engagement and you never did once opposed it, it gave me hope. Maybe you just needed time. So I gave you space. I don't actually care how long I'll need to wait for you to finally come to me. I don't care if it will take you forever. I just keep on believing that one day, you'll run towards me and will give me that sign that I needed to finally confess." he paused for a while looking on the ground. 

Then he continued. "What I'm trying to say is that I love you since then." His eyes slowly move to look at me.

"Y-you do?!" Tears fell down my cheeks. What have I done in my past life to deserve this man?!

"Yes, you silly one! I'm just waiting for you to come to me. To give me a sign that you're ready for us. You don't know how happy I am the first time you called me love and planted a soft kiss on my lips. You turned my world upside down that I needed to get away for a while to calm my heart." he chuckled. His revelation is too much.

"W-why?" I still asked like an i***t. That question is actually directed to myself.  I will not be surprised if he won't be able to hear it. 

"Because I love you!" He said it with so much love in his eyes. Tears streamed down my face. Why haven't I noticed all this? I've wasted so much time looking for happiness not knowing that my real happiness is just waiting for me to come home. 

He's opening to me now, I need to do the same. If I want to restart our relationship, I need to come clean right now. I was about to speak when he spoke again.

"When mom left us, my dad's life was shattered. That I almost lost faith in love. Mom used me to get what she wants, feeding me with so many lies just to have her so-called freedom. But then, your innocent face flashed on my mind. You'll never do that to me love, right?" bitterness and hatred are in his voice. I cannot find my tongue. How can I tell him that I did almost the same thing to him? that I used him to enjoy my freedom? Can he ever forgive me? I cried my heart out on my hand. What have I done?!

"Hey, why are you crying love?" he worriedly wrapped his arms around my body. I shrugged my head. My emotions are overflowing. So overwhelmed, confused, and anxious, all at the same time. Oh God, what should I do? If I tell him that, I'm sure he'll hate me forever. I will lose him. 

"Hey love please look at me. Are you okay?" He held my face up to face him. Looking at his face right now, I'm sure that I'll die if I lose him. I'm sorry if I'll be selfish again. I wrapped my arms around his neck. I felt his arms around my body hugging me back.

"I-I'm j-just happy." I lied. I closed my eyes tightly while tears are still flowing like a river on my face. I'm sorry, but I cannot lose you love.

"You scare me. I thought maybe because you don't feel the same way, you do right?" he whispered in my ears calculating. I didn't say a word. I just stayed in my position savoring the heat coming from his body.

"Y-you don't?" fear is evident in his voice now. I panicked. Without a word, I removed my arms around him and cupped his face in my hands. I closed my eyes then kissed him with all of my fears, doubts, and love I have for him. I felt his body tensed out of surprise perhaps but not for long. I felt one of his hands moved up from my back to my cheeks. 

He deepened our kiss. Using his other arm, he pulled my body up letting me sit on his lap. At first, he's contented with our lips simply touching, but later on, he's tasting my lower lip, lightly biting, then did the same on my upper lip. I put my arms around his neck again, not minding the people around us. His tongue traced my lower lip that a soft moan escaped my mouth. He took advantage of it. He pushed his tongue inside my mouth, exploring and tasting. I held his head even tighter, closing the space that we have if there are any. The different sensation is flowing inside my body. This must be a pleasure is. I feel hot, frantic, and I like it. 

Our lips parted when we needed some air to breathe. We stared at each other's eyes. I can't believe it, we just shared our first real kiss. I can see the fire in his eyes. I know it is a reflection of mine as well.

"I-I love you!" I said breathlessly. I'm still trying to catch my breath. A smile formed on his lips.

"Say it again please." he cupped my face using both his hand. While looking tenderly in my eyes.

"I love you." there, I said it again with all my heart. He smiled with glitz of tears at the corner of his eyes. Happiness is all over his face. I reciprocated his smile, hiding the guilt deep inside me. He hugged me again.

"I love you so much love!"

Please help me god! I hugged him back then close my eyes.