Hey, Mr. In Denial (LBGT)

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

I really don't know what's more embarrassing; the fact that I saw Dustin half-naked, grinning down at me, amused by my expression, or that he threw me his towel, which was wrapped around his body. Just thinking about it has me blushing like a mad man. I flush, erasing those thoughts away as I wear the clothes that he has lent me once more.

Right now, I'm currently wearing his white t-shirt that fits naturally to me. It's one of his old clothes that is too small for him. According to him, he has gained a few muscles. I scoff at that. A few muscles, my face. Since it's really cold outside, despite the sun soaring high in the sky, he lends me his varsity jacket. At the back of the jacket, his last name is written on it and I feel like I'm suddenly his boyfriend.

Pushing the thought away at the back of my head, I stare myself in the mirror and once satisfied with how I look, I get out of the room only to find him lazily watching a television show. His hair is now slicked back to perfection, and his lips are in a pucker. His eyes move from the television show to me, and his eyes shine with something. He immediately stands up, knocking off the remote in his hand only to bend down and pick it up again, turning off the television. I chuckle, rolling my eyes playfully at him. He then moves forward, motioning for me to follow him. I follow suit, trailing behind as I watch his back flex as he walks rather sexily. Is it possible for a man to look sexy just by walking? Dustin. Dustin. Dustin can pull off that easily. Dustin locks the door of his house, then jogs at his truck's direction.

He climbs into the driver's seat while I run on the other side and climb into the passenger seat. I notice that he's wearing only a plain grey t-shirt and a beige colored shorts. Simple clothes really look good on him. His tattooed is visible and is standing out. While the others look like a maniac when they have a tattoos on their arms, Dustin is very different. When you take a look at him, you wouldn't think that he's a maniac at all. Instead you would think of him as an angel who rebelled. And it's a good sight.

"What? Why are you staring at me like that?" he asks me, his brows furrowing as he takes a look in the mirror, checking to see if there's something on his face. I curse under my breath, shaking my head. I was practically drooling at him, and it's so obvious, and he caught me. I flush, cheeks and ears reddening as I try to calm myself down. "Nothing's wrong with my face, right?" Except for being pretty, nope. Nothing wrong.

Putting the key into the ignition and turning it around, the truck purrs to life and in a few minutes, we're hitting the road. I turn on the radio, wanting to know what's playing on a Saturday morning. The street is really crowded; there are only a people milling around the place. We reach the nearest Starbucks at our area, and Dustin parks on the side, just in front of the store of Starbucks. I hop out of his truck once he's parked on the side and wait for him. He climbs out of his truck and runs beside me, and then together we walk up right into the store. The smell of the coffee beans instantly invade my nose, and the scent is so great. Dustin walks right up into the counter and greets the brunette girl, whose name is Ashley. I immediately tell myself that this girl is going to flirt with Dustin for a few moments, but she never does. Instead, she takes his order and takes mine, knowing that we're together. Not together together, but together as friends. Am I making sense? As what he mentioned earlier, he orders a venti of Java Chips while I order a venti of Dark Mocha. Dustin also orders a few chips, and the girl motions for us to wait on the other side, which we do.

My eyes dart in back and forth around the area, and my eyes widen at what I see. Lilith, Dale, Gloss, Kaila, Ashton, and Derek are also here. The world is really so small. They haven't seen me yet so perhaps we could just sneak out and they'd never notice that we have come here. Looking at my best friends, a guilt flashes across my features. I didn't mean to not spend time with them. To be honest, I miss Gloss and his remarks at me, and Derek's snarky comments. It's just that I'm trying to get away as far as possible from Dale, and since Dale is always with them, I have to get away from them, too.

The girl hands us our orders and Dustin thanks him. As we're about to turn around and get out of the store, they notice me. They notice us.

"Oh, hi Beau!" Kaila's voice rings in my ears sweetly. I freeze dead in my tracks, looking at them hesitantly, and when I do, I try to be surprised as much as possible. She pouts at me, crossing her arms across her chest. She misses me just as much as I miss her. "Hi, Dustin! Come sit with us."

Looking over my shoulder, I see Dustin nodding at Kaila's invitation and he walks up to them, taking a seat just beside Kaila. The girl from the counter catches my attention, calling out my name and I wonder how did she get my name and then I realize that the Starbucks employees are asking for their customer's name so they could write it down on the cup incorrectly. I get back to the counter only for her to hand me the chocolate chips in a paper bag.

I hear someone gasps just a few tables away, but I ignore it. I pick up the paper bag and head back to the table where my friends are. Dustin is casually sipping his Java Chips drink, winking at me once his eyes meet mine. I take a seat beside him, and Ashton eyes us suspiciously, his eyes darting back and forth between me and Dustin.

"Are you guys together?" Ashton asks curiously, his eyes still looking between me and Dustin. Dustin and I share a look. "That explains the varsity jacket, I guess. You're practically telling everyone here that Dustin is your boyfriend. Frazetto, nice."

"Are you guys together?" Gloss asks the same question, leaning down, awaiting for my answer, which I refuse to answer. Dale is silent while Lilith rubs her palms across his arm. I ignore the feeling bubbling inside my chest; jealousy shouldn't be there in the first place. If I have to repeat it to myself a million times, I will do so. I have no right to display jealousy. I can only keep it inside me. "You guys are pretty close. That varsity jacket..."

"Beau has a boyfriend. Beau has a boyfriend..." my Russian best friend sings, grinning from ear to ear at me. I want to s***h his throat out, to make him stop. It's embarrassing me. Being teased with someone, Dustin must feel like he's being played now. Yet when I look at him, he's just simply all smiles, not really getting offended.

"He's not my boyfriend," I say like Chowder, I am. "We just slept into his house and lent me clothes, that's it." I spill, and then my eyes widen as I see them grinning at me. All of them except Dale. Dustin's shoulder is shaking, trying to suppress his laughter and I glare at him, shooting him an icy glare. There's this sudden urge to flip him off, but I can't afford to do so. "We did not, like, sleep sleep, but we just slept. More like, I slept over at his house." I explain, and the way they burst out laughing, I know for one thing that they don't believe me.

Still, Dale doesn't see any amusement at this, though. He doesn't react but instead remains silent. Dustin puts a hand on my thigh, and a blush makes its way to my neck up to my cheeks. I purse my lips and then look at my friends around me. They all have the glittering eyes as they watch me squirm. Shoving my hand inside the paper bag to get some chocolate chips, I eat one. Like the whole piece of chocolate chip, and Gloss bursts out laughing. Half of the chip is in my mouth while the other half is outside.

"I thought I was the one who ordered that," Dustin says, amusement coating his voice as he looks at me with his beautiful and alluring eyes. "That's not fair. You need to share."

I glare at him, putting the paper bag on my side. I shake my head at him. That's when Dustin leans down, which makes my eyes widen, and eats the other half of the chip that is just outside my mouth, his lips merely inches away from mine. Kaila squeals rather loudly, making some of the customers look at us with irritation. My heart races faster, pounding against my chest as I look at him. He continues to chew on the chocolate chip that he basically stole out of my mouth. I'm not going to complain.

His lips were mere inches away from mine, and one move would have made our lips collided. The beating of my heart doesn't slow down. Instead, my heart beats even faster than ever. A sound breaks me from my reverie and I look at Dale, eyes wide. His arm has slapped the table, and I don't know whether he did that on purpose or not, but I don't care. I continue to eat chocolate chips, sharing some with Dustin. The image doesn't really fade away in my head. I feel like it's going to be there for a long time.

A knee bumps into mine, breaking my eye contact with Dustin. The person across from me is Dale. When I look at him, he's engaged on a conversation with Lilith. I block their conversation, seeing how animated Dale is when talking to Lilith. He's not like that when he's with me. But then again, he has never been with me. Argument valid.

"So how long have you guys been together?" Lilith asks me, her eyes staring right at me, a grin evidently tugged on her lips as she waits for my answer. Everyone stops talking only to stare at Dale and I.

"We're not together," I say.

"About to be," Dustin chirps.

My eyes meet Dustin's, and the world slowly fades. I forget that I'm with my friends. All I can focus at is Dustin. He has a beautiful smile tugged across his lips, and his eyes crinkle when he smiles. There are lines at the edge of his eyes, and that makes me believe that his smile is very genuine. My hand that is resting on the seat beside me, I feel his hand on top of mine. My breath hitches when his eyes flicker down my lips. My heart feels like it's about to burst, like it's about to explode in different colors.

There's a bump on my knee again and it breaks me out of my trance. I shoot Dale an icy glare, which he ignores, staring at me with a blank expression. What is his problem, anyway? He arches a brow at me, and no one – literally no one – notices his attitude that he's throwing my way. It's not like I did something wrong with him. I was just having a moment with Dustin, and he ruined two moments now just by bumping his knee on mine. Cursing under my breath, I scratch my cheek. The warmth of his hand seeps right through mine as his hand continues to rest on mine, and I let out a shaky breath.

"I'm gonna drink my tears tonight; I'm gonna drink my tears and cry." Derek sings in an awful voice, putting a hand on his chest, pretending he really feels the song. "Cuz I know you love me, baby. I know you love me baby."

I look at my Russian best friend weirdly, shaking my head. He's this crazy. No one can overpower him when it comes craziness. He's literally the King of it and no one could dethrone him. Not even Kaila. I continue to munch on my chocolate chips, trying to ignore the heat Dustin is passing through our connected hands. Well, not really connected since his hand is just resting on tone of mine, but forgive me Lord, I want to hold it in my hand.

"Halloween party is near," Ashton says, ignoring Derek's annoying voice. "Just a week. We still have to prepare. I'll have to drop-by at the costumes store to see what's good on me."

"Slutty nurse," Kaila comments, snickering when Ashton narrows his eyes at Kaila. "You'll pull it off, trust me. In the first place, you and John had s*x on a boat." Ashton's cheeks flush, throwing Kaila an icy glare. He flips her off. "And the fact that you have let Gloss suck you off in the bathroom of a club, well... slutty nurse will definitely look good on you. Derek was all over you, too."

"Enough of that," Ashton squirms, staring shyly at everyone. Everyone bursts out laughing. The school has known that both Ashton and John had their first time s*x on a boat at a party Mike – best friend of Noah, boyfriend of Gloss, who turned out to be gay as well, threw. That fact has spilled because for one: Ashton couldn't keep his mouth shut. And second: he told Kaila. The story was passed on and on until it reached the faculty members. "I'm not going as a slutty nurse. John will definitely kill me."

"You mean he's going to pound your ass?" Derek suggests, snickering.

Dale is not comfortable at this topic. Everybody knows that. Around us, Dale is really the only straight person in our crowd, so he's not used to gay s*x and such. But it's a normal thing for us. We talk about it a lot, and Kaila always initiates it. Kaila always brings up the topic, and the topic will be stretched out than intended. A few s****l innuendos here and there will make our minds active, and soon, we'll be laughing, shouting s****l stuff at each other. Dale gives me an awkward look, and I just smile at him. Lilith is tracing her index finger on Dale's arm, drawing circles. I wish I was the one doing that. I wish I was the one touching him. I wish I was Lilith.

"What are you guys doing later?" Gloss asks, staring at each one of us. Dustin hasn't spoken anything ever since we came to sit here. I wonder if he's uncomfortable with my friends. Looking at him, he doesn't really show any signs of being uncomfortable. He's still all smiley, and that makes me happy. He's just listening to everyone, and that's when I realize that he's really a great listener. Even last night, when I talked, told him stories about me, he just listened, nodding his head, agreeing to every words I said. He's a great listener. He really is. "Let's help Ashton."

"Let's help Ashton to get a slutty nurse outfit as a costume," Derek pushes, laughing.

"I'm not going as a slutty nurse," Ashton whacks the back of Derek's head and I stifle a laugh. Derek pouts, rolling his eyes playfully at Ashton. There's a bump on my knee again, and this time, Dale and I are looking at each other. He has purposely done that, trying to catch my attention. I don't know what's really going on, but his eyes tell me something.

"There's this store I know," Dale says as he looks at me. I let out a shaky breath, ignoring the intensity of his gaze at me. Earlier Dustin was the one who was making me feel like this, but now it's Dale's turn. I'm not really sure what to feel about that, but it's definitely a good feeling. Dale never breaks the eye contact as he speaks. His voice is like a string of lyre releasing a melodic tunes, as if Apollo is the one playing it. My heart, once again, races faster. I haven't had time to recover, and now here's my heart, beating like a racing car. Once his knee bumps into mine, he never moves it away. Our knees just stay intact, and his skin feels warm against mine. Much warmer than what Dustin is making me feel. He continues to speak, "it's actually just near my house. But I'm not going to tell you about it since it has a lot of beautiful costumes, and I'm only bringing Beau."

Words are stuck inside my throat, not daring to escape out of my mouth. His eyes hold me in place, and the fact that his eyes have so much intensity as he looks right through me, it's making my knees wobbly, like a Jelly-O. I'm not really how to speak any more. I open my mouth, but I shut it close, as if I'm like a fish. I don't know what I'm feeling. I don't know what I'm feeling. I have no idea what I'm feeling.

This is no longer infatuation.

I like him.

I like Robert Dale Waites.

I don't know what emotion I should show. I'm terrified yet it excites me. I need to get away from him as far as possible, I keep telling myself that. I know that it's now the right time to leave them alone, to get out of here and just stay inside my room while blasting music of Adele.

This feeling that I have in me, this feeling that is directly towards Dale, it's a road to love. It's not something that I should be grateful. It's not something that I should celebrate. The feeling of being rejected again comes hunting me, replaying inside my head like a broken record. I have been rejected already by Gloss, and it broke me. It really broke me. I don't want to feel this. I don't want this.

Without waiting any longer, I practically jump out of the table and run, muting the shouting voice of Dale, telling me to stop.