A Playboy's Past

Chapter 2

“VIRGIN DAY HIGH DANCE AUDITION. ALL PARTICIPANTS ARE TO SEND A 2-MIN VIDEO OF THEM DANCING TO THE CONTACT BELOW. ENTRY CLOSES ON THE 25TH OF JUNE”

JAEL’S POV

AS I SAW THE POSTER ON THE NOTICE BOARD MY HEART SMILED WITH THE JOY OF A RISING SUN. I LOVED DANCING; IT WAS MY SECOND-BEST THING. COMICS WERE FIRST.

I WALKED TO MY LOCKER TO PICK MY BIOLOGY NOTE AND THEN REMEMBERED THE THREAT NOTE I HAD RECEIVED EVER SINCE MY FRIENDSHIP WITH JADEN. IT WAS WEIRD COS HIS SUDDEN INTEREST IN ME WAS PRETTY SUSPICIOUS. I COULD GUESS WHO THE NOTE WAS FROM, THEY WERE THE BIGGEST GIRLS IN OUR GRADE AND THEY WERE CLOSELY RELATED TO THE GUYS. THERE WAS DEJA AND MONDE, JADEN AND ROMEO’S SISTERS. THE LETTER HAD SPECIFICALLY TOLD ME TO STAY AWAY FROM JADEN, WHICH WAS WHAT I HAD BEEN DOING FOR A WEEK. HE SEEMED TO NOTICE BUT DIDN’T REACT. GOOD FOR ME ANYWAY. AS I SIGHTED MONDE AND DEJA WALKING TOWARDS ME, I INVOLUNTARILY LET OUT A SIGH. I ALREADY DID THEIR BIDDING. NOW WHAT DID THEY WANT WITH ME?

“HI” I VOLUNTEERED THE MOMENT THEY STOPPED RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. THEY WERE WEARING MAKE UP WHICH WAS AGAINST SCHOOL RULES.

“I GUESS YOU SAW OUR NOTE. YOU’VE BEEN A GOOD GIRL FOR THE PAST FEW DAYS.” MONDE SAID, AN INTIMIDATING SMILE PLAYING ACROSS HER LIPS AS HER HAZEL EYES BLINKED CONTINUOUSLY AT ME., SHE WAS BEAUTIFUL AND SHE KNEW IT.

“KEEP IT UP, OKAY?” JADEN’S FEMALE VERSION SAID. AND AS IF SUMMONED TO DISRUPT THE AIR OF ASSURANCE THEY HAD IN MY OBEDIENCE, JADEN CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND PLACED HIS HAND AROUND MY NECK.

“HEY. WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT WITH MY FRIEND? ANY TROUBLE?” THE SMILE ON HIS FACE TOLD ME THEY WERE COMMUNICATING IN SOME KIND OF SECRET LANGUAGE. MONDE’S EYES RETURNED FROM JADEN’S FACE TO MINE AND SHE SAID WITH A FORCED SMILE, “DON’T FORGET” THEN LEFT.

JADEN DRAGGED ME THROUGH THE HALLWAY WHILE I PROTESTED ALL THE WAY TILL WE GOT TO THE SCHOOL FIELD.

” HEY! WHAT WAS THAT FOR? YOU’RE GONNA PUT ME IN TROUBLE!” I YELLED, MY CHEEKS BURNING WITH ANGER.

“WHY HAVE YOU BEEN AVOIDING ME?” HE SAID STARING INTENTLY INTO MY EYES PROBABLY WITH A VIEW OF INTIMIDATING ME AND IT WORKED. I HURRIEDLY YANKED MY WRIST FROM HIS FIRM GRIP. HE SEEMED TO SOBER UP AFTER SEEING THAT MY WRIST WAS NOW PINK AS A RESULT OF THE FIRMNESS IT WAS SUBJECTED TO.

“WHAT TROUBLE?” HE ASKED A FROWN SETTLING ON HIS FACE LIKE HE WAS REALLY CONCERNED. HE PROBABLY WAS.

“LOOK, JUST FORGET I SAID ANYTHING. OUR FRIENDSHIP WOULD HAVE ENDED SOON ENOUGH ANYWAY. SO …” I FELT LIKE I HAD LEFT AN ELIPSIS AT THE END OF MY STATEMENT BUT IT DIDN’T MATTER.

“DID THEY THREATEN YOU?” HE SAID, HIS FROWN SETTLING DEEPER. I REALLY HATED HIS FACE WITH A FROWN ON IT. HE LOOKED LIKE A HEARTLEES DEMON THAT WAY AND I DIDN’T LIKE IT. HE CAME CLOSER SO THAT HE WAS JUST ABOUT THREE FEETS AWAY FROM ME. I TRIED NOT TO LOOK AFFECTED BY HIS CLOSENESS TO ME IN THIS KIND OF SITUATION.

“NO. NOBODY THREATENED ME. I JUST FEEL LIKE YOU BEING SO POPULAR AND ME BEING ME MIGHT GET ME IN TROUBLE WITH YOUR FEMALE ADMIRERS, ESPECIALLY THE CRAZY ONES” I LOOKED DOWN AFTER I SPOKE STILL FEELING UNEASY ABOUT HIS FROWNED FACE.

“LIKE MONDE?” HE SAID AND I ALMOST LOST MY COOL. I DIDN’T LIKE LYING. IN FACT, PRETENSE WAS NEVER MY THING. I WASN’T ENJOYING THIS CONVERSATION SO I WASN’T GOING TO CONTINUE.

“LOOK, JUST STAY AWAY FROM ME. I DON’T WANT ANY TROUBLE, PLEASE.” THE LAST WORD SOUNDED A BIT PITIFUL WHICH WAS WHAT I WAS FEELING BUT I DIDN’T WANT HIM TO FEEL LIKE THAT ABOUT ME SO I WALKED OUT BEFORE HE COULD SAY A WORD.

I RAN INTO THE LOO AND MADE SURE THAT THE DOOR WAS CLOSED AND THEN I RECALLED IN EXACT WORDS WHAT MY FATHER HAD SAID WHEN HE FLEW BACK HOME BECAUSE NANNY SUSAN HAD TOLD HIM WHAT HAPPENED.

“ONE MORE SCHOOL…” HE HAD THUNDERED WHILE SHAKING HIS FORE FINGER AT ME FURIOUSLY

“ONE MORE SCHOOL JAEL AND I’LL SEND YOU TO A REHAB, MAYBE THEY’LL KNOW WHY YOU ALWAYS LET PEOPLE HURT YOU.” AND THEN HE CONTINUED, “I CAN’T KEEP CLEANING YOUR MESS BECAUSE YOU ARE NEVER ABLE TO FIGHT OFF BULLIES. SO, YOU HAD BETTER NOT GET BULLIED OR PICKED ON AND IF YOU DO, FIGHT IT COS A REHAB SURE ISN’T A NICE PLACE TO BE”, HE HAD BELLOWED ANGRILY.

I SNAPPED BACK TO REALITY AFTER I HEARD SOMEONE WALK IN. I UNBOLTED THE DOOR, WASHED MY FACE TO GET ALL TRACES OF TEARS OFF AND WALKED OUT WITH A PLASTIC SMILE, ONE THAT I HAD HAD TO WEAR ALL MY LIFE. I WALKED TO MY LOCKER TO GET MY HEADPHONE AND COMIC BOOK AND HAD TO ENDURE THE REST OF SCHOOL HOURS. BIG THANKS TO MY CHAUFFEUR WHO DIDN’T LET ME SPEND EXTRA TIME ENDURING THE t*****e OF BEING IN SCHOOL.

JADEN’S POV

THE REST OF THE SCHOOL HOURS WENT IN A BLUR. I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT SHOCKED ME MORE, THE FACT THAT I HAD FELT THAT WAY FOR A GIRL OTHER THAN DEJA AND… MY MOM OR THE LOOK ON JAEL’S FACE WHEN SHE LEFT THE ARENA. IN THE THREE WEEKS I HAD KNOWN HER. I HAD NEVER SEEN HER LOOK LIKE THAT. IT WASN’T ANGER, IT LOOKED LIKE FEAR, A REALLY GREAT FEAR. I WAS REALLY CONFUSED BUT I KNEW I HAD TO KEEP MY FRIENDSHIP WITH HER BECAUSE MY FRIENDS HAD DARED ME TO MAKE HER TELL ME THAT SHE WAS IN LOVE WITH ME. IT WASN’T NEW COS WE DID THIS TO EVERY GIRL THAT WE FELT WAS A PREY AND WE USUALLY WON BUT THIS SEEMED LIKE IT WAS GOING TO BE A LITTLE DIFFERENT. AT FIRST IT WAS PURE BUSINESS BUT ON GETTING TO KNOW HER, MY FEELINGS GREW. I HAD BEEN DENYING IT ALL THIS WHILE COS I COULDN’T COME TO TERMS WITH THE FACT THAT I WAS IN LOVE WITH A GIRL I HAD BEEN FRIENDS WITH FOR ONLY THREE WEEKS.

“OH, HOW HAS THE MIGHTY FALLEN?” MY CONSCIENCE SEEMED TO MOCK ME. I COULDN’T TELL THE BOYS; ELSE THEY WOULD MAKE JEST OF ME AND I DIDN’T NEED THAT RIGHT NOW. WHAT I NEEDED WAS TO TALK TO JAEL.

******NEXT DAY******

I WAS DETERMINED TO MAKE HER TALK TO ME. IT WAS RECESS AND UNUSUALLY SHE SPENT IT IN HER CLASS. THANK GOODNESS SHE WAS THE ONLY ONE THERE, THE HUSTLE AND BUSTLE OF THE AUDITION WAS TAKING ITS TOLL. STUDENTS WERE REHEARSING, RECORDING, OR HELPING A FRIEND OUT. GOOD FOR ME ANY WAY.

SHE DIDN’T LOOK UP AS I WALKED IN PROBABLY COS, SHE HAD HER HEADSET ON AND I MADE AN EFFORT TO BE AS QUIET AS POSSIBLE. WHEN I WAS STANDING IN FRONT OF HER, SHE LOOKED UP FROM THE JUDGE DREDD COMIC SHE WAS READING BUT DIDN’T TAKE HER HEADSET OFF, I FELT LIKE SHE WAS TELLING ME TO GO AWAY. NOT A CHANCE. I TOOK THEM OFF AND SHE GLARED AT ME, STRAINING HER HAZEL PUPILS.

“CAN WE TALK?” I SAID WITH NO FURTHER ADO

“NO!” SHE DECLARED AND MADE TO PUT HER HEADSET BACK ON BUT I WAS QUICKER. I GRABBED HER WRIST AND SAID BEFORE DRAGGING HER OUT.

“SORRY BUT YOU DON’T REALLY HAVE A CHOICE.” I COULDN’T FIND A PLACE THAT WAS EMPTY, IT WAS ALL TAKEN UP BY STUDENTS AND I NEEDED US TO BE ALONE. I DRAGGED HER TO THE BACK OF THE CAFETERIA. IT WAS MORE OF A FIELD, NOT SO BIG AND NOT REALLY OPEN TO THE PUBLIC. THAT WOULD HAVE TO DO.

I WAS ABOUT ASKING THE MYRIAD OF QUESTIONS THAT I HAD MEANT TO ASK WHEN I BROUGHT HER HERE. I WANTED TO ASK WHY SHE ACTED LIKE THAT YESTERDAY, I WANTED TO ASK WHY AND HOW SHE HAD SUDDENLY REVIVED MY CONSCIENCE, I WANTED TO ASK IF SHE KNEW THAT SHE MADE MY HEART BEAT WILDLY, BUT AS I SAW HER EYES DART ROUND AS IF MAKING SURE WE WERE ALONE, I SAW THAT SAME LOOK FROM YESTERDAY SETTLE ON HER FACE. FOR SOME REASON I WANTED TO MAKE HER FEEL SAFE. I WANTED TO PROMISE HER THAT NO ONE WOULD HURT HER COS I WASN’T GOING TO LET THEM BUT INSTEAD I WRAPPED MY ARMS ARROUND HER IN AN EMBRACE THAT MADE HER HEAD REST ON MY CHEST, HER EAR DIRECTLY ON MY HEART. I WAS SURE SHE COULD HEAR IT BEAT ERRATICALLY. I JUST HELD HER THERE UNSURE OF WHAT TO DO. BUT THEN I HEARD HER MUTTER SOMETHING. I PULLED HER AWAY FROM ME GENTLY BUT MADE SURE THAT SHE WAS STILL SO CLOSE TO ME. I LOOKED INTO THE EYES THAT HAD CAPTIVATED ME THE VERY DAY THAT I HAD FIRST STARED INTO THEM AND MY HEART BLED AS I SAW TEARS WELL IN THEM. I WANTED TO HUG HER AGAIN BUT SHE MOVED A STEP BACKWARDS IN AN UNSTEADY MANNER THAT CONFIRMED THAT SOMETHING WAS INDEED WRONG.

“JAEL” I WHISPERED INVOLUNTARILY; I HAD NEVER FELT SO VULNERABLE IN MY WHOLE LIFE. FOR EVERY STEP I TOOK TOWARDS HER SHE TOOK A STEP BACKWARD.

“JAEL, PLEASE JUST TELL ME WHAT’S WRONG. I HATE SEEING YOU LIKE THIS, PLEASE” I SAID WHEN I SAW THAT SHE PROBABLY WASN’T GOING TO LET ME COME CLOSE TO HER. ONLY THEN DID SHE SPEAK A LITTLE BIT AUDIBLY SO I COULD HEAR WHAT SHE HAD BEEN MUTTERING. “I…I DON’T…I DON’T WANT TO GO TO A REHAB” SHE STUTTERED AND THE TEARS FELL TO HER CHEEK LIKE RAINDROPS. I WAS MORE CONFUSED THAN EVER, I CROSSED THE GAP BETWEEN US BEFORE SHE COULD MOVE AGAIN AND HELD HER BY THE SHOULDERS, STARING DOWN INTO HER EYES. “JAEL JUST TALK TO ME”, I MUTTERED.

ME LOOKING INTO HER EYES HAD PROBABLY BROUGHT HER OUT OF HER REVERIE AS SHE SPOKE A LITTLE LIKE HER NORMAL SELF BUT STILL FEARFULLY.

“JADEN PLEASE JUST STAY AWAY FROM ME, I DON’T WANT TO GO TO A REHAB, PLEASE” I SAW HER TEARS WELL UP AGAIN, IT WAS TAKING A LOT OF WILL POWER TO STOP MYSELF FROM CRYING.

“JAEL I’M NOT GOING TO LET YOU GO UNLESS YOU EXPLAIN EVERYTHING TO ME.” I SAID FIRMLY AND SHE PROBABLY GUESSED THAT I WAS BEING SERIOUS. I DROPPED MY HANDS FROM HER SHOULDERS AFTER SHE TOOK A LOOK AT IT AND THEN TOOK A STEP BACKWARDS.

“MONDE AND DEJA SAID TO STAY AWAY FROM YOU. THEY SAID THEY WERE GOING TO MAKE MY LIFE HELL. I CAN’T GET PICKED ON OR BULLIED AGAIN ELSE MY DAD IS GONNA SEND ME TO REHAB”, SHE ENDED TEARFULLY.

I REALLY DIDN’T WANT HER TO CRY AGAIN BUT I WAS CONFUSED AS TO WHY A FATHER WOULD PUSH HIS DAUGHTER INTO THIS KIND OF DISTRESSING FEAR.

“HAVE YOU BEEN BULLIED BEFORE?” WAS THE ONLY THING THAT CAME OUT OF MY MOUTH. SHE NODDED AND SAID, “I’VE HAD TO CHANGE SCHOOLS FIVE TIMES NOW AND MY DAD ALWAYS HAS TO COME BACK WHEN THE REPORT GETS TO HIM”. I GUESSED HER DAD DIDN’T STAY WITH THEM.

“YOUR MUM APPROVES OF YOU GOING TO THE REHAB?” I FELT LIKE I WAS DISTRESSING HER BUT I COULDN’T HELP ASKING QUESTIONS.

“SHE’S GONE.” WAS ALL SHE SAID.

“JAEL”, I SAID AND ONCE AGAIN HUGGED HER. I FELT HER HEART RACE AGAINST MY TORSO.

“I PROMISE THAT NO ONE WOULD EVER HURT YOU WHEN I’M THERE. I’LL FIGHT FOR YOU. I PROMISE.” I CARESSED HER HAIR AS I SAID SO AND SHE SEEMED TO CALM DOWN. SHE PULLED HERSELF AWAY FROM ME AND THEN LOOKED AT ME.

“WHAT DO YOU WANT IN RETURN?” I WAS KIND OF SHOCKED BUT I WAS RELIEVED AS SOON AS THE FEELING CAME.

“DON’T EVER AVOID ME.” I SAID WITH A SMILE. HER REQUEST SHOCKED ME SO TO SAY.

“WILL YOU BE MY FRIEND?” I LAUGHED LIGHTLY AND SHE BLUSHED, EMBARASSED AND I CAUTIONED MYSELF AND NODDED. HER FACE BRIGHTENED WITH A SMILE AND I HATED THE PEOPLE THAT HAD MADE HER LOOK SO SAD, EVEN IF IT INCLUDED MY SISTER.

“RECESS WILL BE OVER SOON; WASH YOUR FACE I’LL BE WAITING HERE.” I SAID AS WE GOT TO THE FRONT OF THE FEMALE LOO.

JAEL’S POV

I NODDED SLOWLY AND ENTERED THE LOO. I WASHED MY FACE AND THEN STARED AT MY REFLECTION IN THE MIRROR. I COULDN’T UNDERSTAND WHY I HAD STAYED IN HIS EMBRACE EVEN THOUGH I KNEW THE RISK. IT HAD FELT WARM AND SAFE. I HADN’T FELT LIKE THAT IN A WHILE. I HAD ASKED HIM TO BE MY FRIEND. OMG! WTF WAS I THINKING BEFRIENDING THE MOST POPULAR GUY IN SCHOOL. BUT SOMEWHERE IN THE CORNER OF MY HEART HIS WORDS LINGERED

NO ONE WOULD EVER HURT YOU WHEN I’M THERE

I SMILED AND REASSURED MYSELF THAT I WAS READY FOR ANYTHING. I WOULD ENDURE IT NO MATTER HOW MUCH IT HURT, EVEN IF IT WAS TO THE POINT OF DEATH.

I GOT OUT OF THE LOO HOLDING THE SHEET OF TISSUE THAT JADEN HAD PUSHED UNDER THE DOOR.

HEY

I HAD TO GO. BE GOOD. NO TEARS. OH YEAH AND DON’T FORGET ABOUT THE AUDITION.

I COULD HELP YOU. MEET ME AT THE ARENA AT 5 IF YOU WANT HELP.

YOUR FRIEND

JADEN.

MY SMILE WAS WIDE. I STUFFED THE SHEET IN MY LOCKER AND HURRIED TO CLASS.