Little Transitions

Turmoil

My whole body stiffened in place, and my mind goes numb.

Being under such strong control is…words can’t describe. It’s like getting your thoughts completely wiped away. It hurts to even think as the sound of his voice is clouding up my judgement.

"Good girl.” Alex says humbly against my ear. I let out a breathy sigh, and sink back into his chest. He massive, rough hands grabs my hips and pulls me closer to him.

I could feel his smile creep onto his face from against my ear.

"Feels good, doesn't it?” Alex whispers, his hot breathe creating condensation on my neck. I whimper in response, unable to retort his advances.

He chuckles huskily. “Now answer me truthfully.” His smile growing wider with each word.

"I…" I begin to start, but something inside of me is able to stop myself from continuing.

Just focus on Matt. Focus on telling him how much you love him, and how sorry you are. Everything you’ve been feeling about him…

“What?” Alex start. “Cat got your tongue?”

"I-I don't know.” I say exasperatedly. It’s so hard to talk around him. It’s like a lump is in my throat. I just can’t come out and say the words that I truly want to say.

Like how I want to punch him in the face, and tell him “f**k you!” for hurting Matty.

His sigh snaps me back in reality.

"My little girl…" He says endearingly while grabbing the ends of my black hair and twisting it in-between his fingers.

"You are exceptionally beautiful, you know this, right?"

I nodded in agreement; completely against my will, mind you.

"Everything about you…it's such a mystery. Like your shadowy hair.” He kisses my forehead and then places the side of his head against the top of mine.

“And your style…” His hands start to outline the curves of my hips. I wince inwardly.

“And your energy…it’s all so mysterious, elegant, fascinating." He gently swipes some hair that was covering my eyes and pulls it behind my ears, revealing the harsh wound that Matt's hybrid form inflicted on me.

He "tsked" several times.

"That boy doesn't deserve you…" He begins.

"He has done nothing but hurt you. Are you going to continue to be his friend, even though he is out of control?" I could hear the venom drip from the word “friend”.

I don’t answer him despite my trembling lips. Alex stays silent for a moment, then lowers his head down to my neck. He starts nipping gently, causing me to shudder violently.

"Say, "Because you are confused, and that he wants you as his plaything".” He states matter-of-factly.

"Be…because…" He’s so sick. It’s not like I’m going to believe it if I say it, but I just can’t for the sole fact of the principle. Matt is perfect. If anything, I am not.

"Because I am confused…" I started tearing up, knowing that I can't control the words coming from my mouth. This has to be the most humiliating thing in existence.

"A-and…"

"Say it dear." He whispers gently.

"And he wants me…as his plaything." I say emotionally.

"Oh my, that is just awful." He says, his hands now fitting into my front pants pockets.

He begins kissing and nipping all around my neck, being careful not to touch the painful wound that Matt had left. I moan and writhe underneath him, my face becoming completely hot under his advances.

This is so wrong, not to mention embarrassing! I would never agree to this under my right mind.

"You like this, don't you?" He mumbles against my cold skin, his voice tender and soulful, like a dream.

"N-!" I start, trying desperately to tell him no; but I just couldn’t. It’s the most frustrating thing in the world, not being able to voice your own opinion.

"If you don't cooperate with me Saskia, then I will kill you." He says darkly in my ear, a slight growl in his angry tone.

"Ngh!" I wail, but I failed to shove him away.

"Mh? Answer me."He says, taking one of my waving arms and brining it behind my back swiftly. I howl in pain from the abrupt movement.

His voice is now playful and taunting, but still firm and strict. Like the playground bully whose in charge of the kickball game.

“Say “I like you, Alex.””

"I like you, Alex." I whisper quietly.

He laughs.

"You what, Saskia?" Now feverishly kissing down my neck.

"I like you, Alex!" I cry out, just ready for this moment to stop.

He pulls back and turns me around so that I face him completely. He then grabs my face in his hands and looks into my eyes. Even though I hate his f*****g guts, his eyes are indeed very beautiful. They were so blue, like the clearest of oceans.

He studies my face this intense gaze, tracing my bruised lips with his thumbs, and scratching away the dried blood from around them.

"Who could hurt a doll like you?" He whispers.

"I want you. Ever since I laid my eyes on you, I knew you were mine." He continues touching every square inch of my face, much to my inner discomfort.

"Do you know what I've had to go through for you, Saskia?” His eyes soften, and I felt safe to relax in his presence for a second.

“I had to fight, kill, and almost die for you.” I immediately tense back up again.

“I even had to get rid of that translator from your school, just so I could get close to you."

My eyes widen, and I gasp slightly. No…

"My dear, I have been keeping an eye on you since your dad bought us…" His facial expression grew cold at this statement.

What was he going on about? I nod slightly, persisting him forward.

"I was rather nervous seeing you. You were so cute, so humble, you cared for us deeply. We all wanted to show you who we actually were, but none of us had the guts.”

Was he talking about…

His voice brings me back to. “Every. Damn. Day I would want to go over to you, but I feared that you didn’t like me…because you named me Shadow." His eyes were hard. A death glare. I swallowed.

Holy s**t. Alex was a part of my pack.

He was one of my wolves.

He was the runt. He was pure white, however, the way he acted around the other wolves and humans made me want to name him Shadow.

He was dodgy, and quick. It would take a lot to get him out of the pen and kennels. He also would rarely wanted to run with me. I just thought that he was a shy.

One day, he ran away. We figured that he got ate up by the wilder wolves and such.

But no. Here he is, standing in front of me. With these intense eyes that say he wants to kill.

My oh my, how much you have changed, Shadow.