8 Find your own path
1998 Words
It had been a few days since Max has seen Trae. The brief instances they would talk would be when Trae would let Max know when he was heading out to play basketball with some other friends, or go who knows where. It was always the same sad smile that Trae would give whenever he headed out. The weekend came around, and even then Trae would not be around a lot. Unlike Max, Trae was actually becoming quite popular. His athleticism was the envy of many guys around the court, and his big frame and rugged demeanor came off as attractive to his female classmates. With Trae’s social life starting to kick-off, he had a lot more to do with his time than sit at his computer all day, unlike Max. Even outside of class, Max would hear about Trae from people that he had never met, with how cool he is and all that. Impatience was starting to build up in Max, as he waited for the answer that his friend would give.
One day, Max decided to talk to his absentee roommate again, and ask about if he was still going to pursue taking on the Wolfpack with him.
“Hey bro?” Max said, laying on top of his bed.
“Yeah?” replied Trae, from his desk.
“Have you decided?”
“Nah man, I haven’t decided if I wanna join the basketball team yet,” said Trae, not completely logged in on the conversation.
“That’s not what I’m talkin’ about man,” replied Max.
As soon as those words left his lips, an awkward vibe drifted into the room.
“Ah that… I’m gonna need a little more time man,” Trae said, putting down his pen.
Trae decided that he did not want to talk further as he started to pack up his things, supposedly for class. Max would not let him go so easily and continued to press on.
“Bro, I know it’s a lot but I need an answer.”
“Yeah… I know. It’s a lot to ask don’t you think?”
“What is?” as Max sat up on his top bunk.
“Askin’ me to put my life in harm's way like this.”
This irked Max as if it was him causing all of the danger that they would be potentially facing.
“What are you tryin’ to say man?” he hopped off of his top bunk.
Trae sensed the hostility and started to become defensive.
“I’m tryna say, maybe this life ain’t for me, man. And you gotta accept that,”
“So answer me, are you going to answer me clearly? Or are you gonna keep runnin’ from me?” Max said, starting to lose his patience. “Listen, you told me you wanted in before we got into college. I planned everything around that, you understand? If you leave then, I’d have to plan it all over, only accounting myself.”
At this point, both of them were squared up to each other in their small studio-sized room.
“You know, this is what I can’t stand about you, Max. You’re always thinking about yourself.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah! Always lookin’ to make money, regardless of whose life at risk. Not a care for the safety of other people you drag along. As long as you make the money right?”
“You know why I need the money Trae!”
Tensions built up behind their words as they slowly started to get more and more aggressive.
“Oh yeah? Then why can’t you earn it like a normal human being?! Why’s it always gotta be illegal or something?”
“Don’t you start that man, you were just as invested in our first gig! You got your ma’ out of poverty, doesn’t that mean anything to you?”
Trae moved closer and looked dead in Max’s eyes.
“Don’t you dare fuckin’ mention my ma’.”
“Yeah? Can’t imagine how she is gonna feel when she realizes the money she got from you was dirt money,”
Trae snapped and swung his fist hard into Max’s cheek. The latter fell back onto the floor and landed on his rear end. After shaking off the initial shock of the impact, Max looked right into Trae’s eyes.
“I need that money so I can get back at a group of bad people. I’m ready to make that choice. If you aren’t willing to make that choice...”
Max stood up and grabbed Trae by the collar of his shirt.
“...then fuckin’ say so!”
Max shoved Trae, causing the latter to stagger back. With that, Trae turned his back and headed
towards the door.
“I’m out,” Trae said, as he slammed the door shut.
It was quiet again in the room as Max gathered himself. He sat down in his chair and looked up at the ceiling. The throbbing in his cheek masked the pain that he was actually feeling inside. A wave of regret washed over the distraught student, as he fought back the urge to scream. His best friend was feeling worried about the dangers, and he had to go and fight him like that. With that, Max picked up a book, and looked for a place on campus to read and be with his thoughts.
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Max sat alone on the rooftop where the environmental science organization of their school kept their flowers and plants. He always found that whenever he needed a quiet place to relax, he could sneak in and just be by himself. Or so he thought.
“Hey, Max Burner,”
He jumped and turned around to find a smiling Jules, glowing as she usually did. It seemed that even her luster could not seem to lift his spirits as he gave her a faint smile and went back to his book. She pursed her lips in intrigue, as she proceeded to share his bench.
“Hmmm, normally the easily flustered Max Burner is now incredibly quiet and deep in thought. I wonder why?”
Max let out a light chuckle.
“Hmm, I wonder,” he replied, still focused on his book.
She wasn’t satisfied with that answer, as she blocked the pages of the book with her hand.
“Is it anything I can help with?”
He let out a sigh and finally returned her gaze.
“I don’t know Jules.”
“Well I could try, right?”
She looked at him, with no kind of malice or trickery. The genuine look of concern in her eyes, and the way her lips parted slightly in expecting an answer, might have made him fall for her a little harder. Her green eyes pierced his soul, as she tilted her head ever so slightly. He was weak to this kind of thing. Whether or not she was doing it on purpose or not did matter to him at this point. He conceded and proceeded to tell her a more censored version of their spat. He did, however, hide information about the Wolfpack and the risk of potential death.
“Well, I didn’t take you for the common criminal, Max,”
“I got a reason for this. It’s for my mom to stay stable.”
“And he is afraid of getting caught,”
“Pretty much.”
“Soooo, it’s your fault?”
Max tried to defend himself at the shock of being blatantly blamed like that right out of the gate.
“I just wanted an answer! And if anything, I don’t know it bothers me more than I think it should. And I don’t know why.”
Jules rested her elbow on her knee and pressed her chin into her hand. She pondered for a moment, before looking back at her saddened companion.
“I think I know why. And you’re a smart guy Max, I think you know why too,”
He shook his head.
“He is your partner in crime isn’t he?”
She rested her hand on his back, and rubbed it slightly.
“You just wanted him along for the ride?”
With his head lowered, he nodded.
“You’re torn between asking him to come along at the risk of danger or not having your trusted partner next to you, huh?”
Max, lowered his head even more, as he pressed his face into his hands.
“That’s why you wanted him to make the choice for you?”
He started to cry into his hands softly, as Jules kept rubbing his back.
“It’s a lot to ask someone… asking them to risk their lives-” he stopped and covered his sentence with a fake cough. “Ahem, I mean, risk them getting caught, for my sake,” Max said, in a slight whisper.
Jules closed her eyes and shook her head.
“I think if it’s the right person, they would do that for you regardless,” she said, as she wiped Max’s tears with her hands.
He looked back up at her and smiled. The two sat in that garden for hours and chatted as the sunset. It was during that conversation that Max steeled his resolve in telling Trae exactly what he wanted, and exactly what was going to happen with the plan. He only hoped that Trae would accept.
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Night fell as Trae came back from off-campus, looking for a temporary solace from socializing. He wanted to be alone, and so that is exactly what he did. For most of the day, he had his hood up and his earphones plugged in, as the mp3 player ran. He hated himself for what he did to Max, and how he blamed him for everything that had happened. He was sad, and even if he had spent the whole day trying to forget, it didn’t work. As he walked back to campus, the cold new york evening air drifted past him, letting him catch a whiff of a familiar scent. It was his mom’s cologne. Instinctively, he looked around, only to find that it was only him walking along that lonely sidewalk.
Out of the corner of his eye, he caught a glimpse of a payphone. He looked at it for a moment, before proceeding to walk up to it. He picked it up, put in a quarter, and dialed in a number. The line rang for a few moments but was picked up before long.
“Hello?”
“Hi Ma’,” Trae said, his voice shaking.
“Oh! Trae, my boy how are you?”
He chuckled a little.
“I’m fine ma.”
“You doin’ ok at school?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh, that’s good! So why’d you call honey?”
He stopped for a moment, thinking of what to say.
“Uh, I don’t know I just felt like callin’. Anyway, how’s everything there? You gettin’ paid by the tenants well enough?”
“Yeah honey I am. Honestly, it was such a blessin’ we ran into that money when we did! Your ol’ lady has more than she knows what to do with now!”
He smiled.
“Don’t worry ma, once I’m out of college, I can keep it goin’ for you. So you don’t have to worry anymore.”
“What are you talkin’ about sugar, you ain’t gotta worry about me no more.” Trae froze, surprised by the reply. “Your momma is doin’ fine. I’m more than happy with what I have now.”
“You are?”
“Yes! I’m comfortable and happy. I’d be even happier to see you do what you really love to do! That’s why I put you in that school in the first place!”
“But- But what if you run out of money! Or nobody rents! What happens then? I can’t let that happen ma,” he replied.
“Well, if that happens, then I’ll have my baby boy come save me, now don’t I?”
Tears started to run down his face as he listened to his mother speak in the softest and most loving tone she has ever spoken.
“That’s why I want you to chase your dreams, and live the life that you choose, Trae. I know you’ll always have your eye on me, so you can do whatever you like! I’ve lived my life so I can make you happy. That’s more than enough for me.”
“You mean it ma’?”
“I do, honey.”
He gasped, trying to stifle his sobs.
“I love you ma’.”
“I love you too, sugar. Find your own path, ok?”
With that, he dropped the phone and started sprinting back into the school, looking for his partner in crime.
- Writer
