Unnoticed

Entry 019

My stomach was churning like an i***t. The moment he hugged me, all I could do was to think about the possibilities that maybe, ‘us’ might work out. That maybe, we have a chance but who am I fooling? It was ‘friendship’, only friendship. The idea of what happened last night still played inside my mind like black and white photographs.

I missed him too much, and I really hated myself for that. But all those miseries flew away when he hugged me. Truth be told, we came back to normal. And since there were no classes today because all the staffs and professors have a meeting, I’m still inside my room.

Dino decided to pester me again, like the way he always did. He was playing some rock music entitled Demon using my phone. And his eyes were half-closed while he was lying on my bed. Yes, he had the guts to lie on my bed as if he owned it for himself.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“What is it?”

“Why don’t you live with your parents? From what I’ve heard, your family is well-off. Why do you like to live life as a commoner?”

I froze when he asked that question. Surely, he really had the guts to ask me things that I never expected to come from a total stranger.

“Because I can’t trust them,” I confessed.

After the accident that happened to me when I was still a fourth-year high school student, there’s this urge to stay away from my parents. It was like every time I’m with them, I felt like I’m doing something that I mustn’t do. Being with them makes me feel sad and angry. Sad and angry for a reason that I barely knew. It was like you already hated a person just by looking at them. And I don’t know why. Maybe, it’s the defense mechanism of my body to stay away from the persons who had the capabilities of hurting me.

He was silent for a moment but after some time, he began talking about crazy stuff again. And that was how we spent my free day. We talked and talked and talked like nothing happened.