Babies Of The Don+18

Chapter 12

•|• Elera's POV •|•

Their bedtime routine was messy and loud and took longer than it should have because Mikhail suddenly remembered he needed a specific stuffed dinosaur and Nikolai insisted he wasn’t sleepy even while yawning every thirty seconds.

By the time they were finally in bed, I was exhausted.

I sat between their small mattresses, smoothing back damp curls and pulling blankets higher over their little bodies.

The room was dim except for the small nightlight glowing near the wall.

“Mama?” Mikhail asked sleepily.

“Yes, baby?”

His eyes blinked heavily at me. “Bring Your Dad To School Day is coming.”

The words made my stomach tighten immediately.

I tried not to let it show.

Beside him, Nikolai sat up slightly. “Can Elijah come?”

I froze.

For a moment I genuinely didn’t know what to say.

Their innocent little faces stared at me expectantly, completely unaware of how deeply those words cut through me.

“Yeah,” Mikhail added quickly. “Can he pretend to be our dad for the day?”

My chest ached so hard it almost felt physical.

I glanced toward the doorway instinctively even though Elijah wasn’t there.

The boys liked him.

Too much maybe.

And the terrifying thing was… Elijah liked them too.

I swallowed carefully before speaking.

“I’ll ask him, okay?”

Their faces lit up instantly.

“Really?” Nikolai asked.

“If he wants to,” I answered softly.

“He’ll say yes,” Mikhail declared confidently.

I forced a smile and leaned down to kiss his forehead.

“We’ll see.”

Nikolai curled deeper beneath his blanket before his expression shifted slightly, becoming quieter somehow.

“Mama?”

“Yes?”

His voice turned small.

“When will our dad come for us?”

Everything inside me stopped.

The room suddenly felt too still.

I looked at him, really looked at him, and saw the question sitting behind his eyes. Not just curiosity.

Longing.

Children always noticed more than adults believed they did.

I moved closer to his bed and brushed my fingers through his hair slowly.

“Soon,” I whispered.

The lie tasted bittersweet.

Or maybe it wasn’t a lie.

Maybe I didn’t even know anymore.

Nikolai nodded sleepily like that answer was enough for now.

Mikhail was already drifting off beside him.

I kissed both their heads one more time, lingering a little longer than usual because suddenly my chest hurt too much.

“I love you,” I whispered.

“We love you too,” Nikolai mumbled half asleep.

Then I quietly stood and left the room before the tears gathering behind my eyes could fully form.

When I stepped back into the living room, Elijah looked up immediately from where he stood near the window.

“They asleep?” he asked softly.

I nodded.

For some reason, neither of us spoke after that.

The silence wasn’t awkward.

It was worse.

It was aware.

I moved toward the door slowly. “I should probably let you go home.”

A faint smile touched his mouth. “Kicking me out already?”

“You’ve been here all day.”

“And?”

I rolled my eyes lightly, but my heart was beating too fast suddenly.

He followed me toward the door anyway.

The apartment felt unbearably quiet now without the boys’ voices filling it.

When we stopped near the doorway, I turned toward him—and immediately regretted it.

He was closer than I expected.

Close enough that I could smell his cologne faintly beneath the clean scent of soap. Close enough that I noticed the tiredness in his eyes. The warmth in them.

Close enough that my breath caught.

Neither of us moved.

My pulse started hammering harder against my ribs.

“Elijah…”

My voice came out softer than I intended.

His gaze dropped briefly to my lips before returning to my eyes.

And slowly—carefully—he reached up, brushing a strand of hair behind my ear with such gentleness it nearly unraveled me.

My breath trembled.

“Tell me to stop,” he murmured quietly.

But I didn’t.

I should have.

God, I should have.

Maybe it was because I have been abstinent for a long time.

Instead I just stood there frozen while his hand lingered lightly against my cheek.

Then he leaned down.

Slow enough for me to stop him.

Slow enough that every second stretched painfully.

I felt his breath first.

Warm.

Then his lips barely brushed mine.

Soft.

Tentative.

A kiss that wasn’t even fully a kiss yet.

And somehow that made it worse.

Because it felt careful.

Like he was trying not to break me.

My entire body reacted instantly, heat rushing through me so suddenly it scared me. For one terrible second I wanted to lean into him. Wanted to close the distance completely and forget every reason I shouldn’t.

Then reality crashed back in.

The boys asleep down the hall.

The man I still couldn’t forget.

The mess my life already was.

I pulled back quickly, my breath uneven.

“I can’t,” I whispered.

Elijah stilled immediately.

His forehead almost touched mine for one lingering second before he stepped back.

I saw it then.

The disappointment he tried to hide.

The quiet hurt in his eyes.

But he still nodded anyway.

“Yeah,” he said softly, voice rougher now. “Okay.”

Guilt twisted painfully in my chest.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.”

But the defeated smile he gave me afterward nearly shattered me anyway.

Because it wasn’t angry.

It was understanding.

And somehow that hurt far more.

He opened the door slowly before looking back at me one last time.

“Goodnight, Thessira.”

My throat tightened.

“Goodnight.”

Then he left.

And I stood there for the longest time afterward, fingers brushing unconsciously against my lips where his had barely touched mine.

Trying not to think about how badly I imagined another completely different man lips on mine.