Ready For Love?

Chapter 18

My anxiety was high as I told myself to stop being a nervous teenager and forced myself out of the ensuite. I stopped dead in my tracks though, when I saw Reid sitting on the bed, facing the doorway I was in, typing on his phone.

Seriously this man was turning me into a ball of nervous energy.... especially when he instantly stopped and looked up at me.

He regards me for a moment and I quickly looked for my bag and went to grab some other clothes. Yep pure avoidance, very mature.

“You can say no.” His deep voice rumbles through the room and I try not to let it affect me.

Try!

“I can. But I want to bossy boots.” I smirk at him with my clothes in my hand and walk back into the bathroom.

He smirks at me and nods.

He really confuses me. Like REALLY confuses me.

I want to ask… wait.

Putting the clothes on the sink, I go and open the door back up and take him in. He’s back on his phone, elbows still on his knees, broad shoulders still on display.

He looks up. f**k he’s hot, like super hot, and I’m not normally into facial hair... but with him... And he somehow looks extra hot with a quirked eyebrow.

“Why?” Is all I asked and crossed my arms.

His brows pinch slightly as he puts the phone down on the bed beside him, never taking his eyes off me. “Why?”

I nod. “Yes, that’s the question I ask. Why? Why can I say no? Why do you believe I should say no?”

A small quirk of his lip up on one side is all I get as he stares me down, but I’m not giving up.

His answer to this will tell me a lot, and he definitely knows that. Seems we have a deep thinker here.

“Don’t want you to feel pressured like you have to, you don't have to please everyone else.” He finally says.

OK... I'm more confused. Or am I? Well, the fact that I'm asking that question means I am and now I'm even questioning myself about what I think when... stop it! Just nod and go back in the bathroom. Good plan. "OK. I’m not.” I confidently say in a happy voice before closing the door behind me.

I have to admit it. He has completely thrown me off my axis. Like I can't even see my starting point.

He can't just want to get laid... until he was saying that because he wants to just get laid now... but I could see there was more to it. There IS more to it. It isn't shallow, there is no obvious pretence... that he doesn't do pretence. What you see is what you get.

He has said he wants to have s*x with me… something my body is screaming yes to and my mind is wanting to run screaming from.

The images of his head between my legs… STOP IT!

OK let's be pragmatic. Facts. 1. He only met me TODAY. 2. Men don't go from 'hi' to 'be my girlfriend' that fast... or do they? Is it because he's older and more concise? Not a teenager or young twenties man still working things out? Anyway. 3. He’s quiet and reserved, a thinker. He wouldn't be saying these things unless he meant them. But what would 'more' mean to a person like him?

Then, of course, 4. He really could be a good way to pull the band-aid off so to speak. We could have some fun and then when it gets too much its easy for me to disappear back home because that's what I'll be doing anyway.

I don't have to worry about running into him at work, the supermarket or anywhere, other than when I come to visit my sister.

Honestly, it is actually a good idea the more I think about it... and forget about the 'more' thing.

He had a full-on smirk now as I opened the door and put my PJs back into my bag. As I stood up, he walked over and crowded me in. I didn’t move and just raised one eyebrow, arms crossed.

Running his finger down my cheek and watching it as it moved made my heart rate pick up.

He looked me in the eyes before he spoke. “I’ll be here when you’re done. I want you but will go at your pace.”

“And what if I don’t want anything?”

“I know you do, but you're hesitant. I won’t force you.” And with that he kissed my forehead again, turned around and went back to sitting on the bed, where he picked up his phone and started scrolling again.

“So instead you go onto dating apps like Tinder or something?” I knew he definitely wasn’t scrolling a dating app right now but wanted to push, challenge him even.

He barked out a laugh. The sound made my stomach twist. “Never been on one, never will. When I’m with someone, it’s only them.” He pierced me with his eyes, making me fidget.

I wasn’t sure I liked how my stomach and heart were reacting to him. But it may just be because this was the first time since… well, the first time they had moved like this for a long time.

“And the bunnies?”

He put his phone down to make sure I knew I had his full attention. This was getting more serious than what I expected and frankly was comfortable with. But I soldiered on.

That’s quite the fitting saying for what this club was. I would laugh at myself right now if I wasn’t staring down a hot biker… spy? Nah. Probably just works here. Mercenary? Could work.

He’s definitely still in top, top shape. I bet… STOP IT!

“They knew it was a one-time thing. Everyone always knows the score. Never let them think otherwise. Either quick f**k or blowy. Never been down on them or…” He looked me up and down slowly making goosebumps take over where he looked. “Taken my time to map out their bodies.”

“But it is what you want? Just to f**k for a few days.” I seriously had to force that out of my mouth.

My throat wanted to close up and not ask that. I didn’t want the answer. Or did I? No! I knew I didn’t.

There was a knock at the door and I wanted to scream THANK f**k!

Thank the f*****g everything!

I took a deep breath as Reid glared at the door before he seriously stomped over to it like a toddler finishing up his tantrum.

But why? Shouldn’t he be glad not to finish that conversation?

He opened the door to Amy. “There’s DD’s mamma bear.” She sang out with a big grin as she looked at me.

“What?” Like seriously, what?

“Deaths Defenders mamma bear or simply Bear since some aren’t that smart or can handle that many words.” She joked as Reid glared at her.

I actually laughed at his scowl, making her finally look at him and blanch.

“She’s more than just a mom.” He crossed his arms as my mouth dropped open, as well as my arms.

“Of course she is!” Amy shot back. “She’s a beautiful, caring, kind-hearted woman with an amazing ass, so I was told.” She looked at me. “Sorry I’m not into women, so I have no clue.”

“All good.” I smiled at her and strangely felt like I had to comfort Reid and calm down the situation.

I walked over and put my hand on his bicep. f**k it was pure muscle.

Holiday fling… sounding better and better.

“Can you give us a minute, Amy. Someone else deserves the title of Bear right now.” I looked at Reid as he tried to contain a smirk.

"Alright." She smirked at Reid. "See you down there, we're all set up." She nodded and walked off as I studied Reid’s face as he closed the door.

“What was that about grumpy?”