The Forbidden Man

Chapter 15- Defeat

That was the final conversation I had with Axis before the summer came to an end and the new school year began. Because he wasn't one of my students this academic year, it's almost as if time has worked in my favor.

The District Meet in November had barely ended when the Division Athletic Meet began by late January. Both competitions happened in the same school year, leaving me breathless in the rush of training schedules and academic duties.

Belleza Maria High School had just secured its place as Guimaras Division Champion, after defeating Nueva Valencia National High School and Jordan National High School in the finals.

The next goal is to be in the Western Visayas Regional Athletic Association Meet in March, our ticket to the Palarong Pambansa in Tagum.

Basketball is the most famous sport event in this Regional Meet – Western Visayas Athletic Association.

Paanong hindi, kung punong-puno ang bleachers ng sports complex sa Iloilo City. Belleza Maria High School, proudly representing Guimaras. Ang kalaban ay Iloilo City National High School, isa sa mga pinakamalakas na team sa Western Visayas. Every year, Iloilo City dominates the rankings, and no one really expects a small-island team like ours to win..

Una at pangalawang quarter pa lang ay lamang na ang Iloilo City, at hindi ko pa nakikitang naglaro si Axis. Pagpasok niya sa ikatlong quarter, biglang sumigaw ang buong bleachers... ang hangin mismo parang sumabog sa tuwa.

Naipalibot ko ang tingin ko sa mga atleta, sa mga kaklase naming nakataas ang bandila ng Guimaras, at sa kanya, sa gitna ng court, parang sinag ng araw sa ilalim ng ilaw ng gymnasium.

Nang magtagpo ang mga mata namin, hindi ko sigurado kung ako nga ba ang tinitingnan niya, pero ngumiti ako.

I expected Iloilo City would win, but somehow, everyone believed Axis could change the rhythm of the game and he did. His calm control of the ball, his sharp passing, the unshakable defense, they turned the tide.

And for the first time ever, Belleza Maria High School won the WVRAA basketball championship.

The crowd erupted. The bleachers shook. Our athletes couldn't stop screaming their joy. And when my eyes met Axis's once more, he was smiling, surrounded by teammates' cheers, his sweat shimmering like triumph itself.

I beamed with pride as I watched him.

I've observed a shift for the better in his disposition and am pleased by his newfound openness to new experiences and people.

He's finally ready to interact with other people.

"Uusad ulit tayo sa palarong pambansa next month! See you, Albay!" sigaw ng mga atleta.

Sobrang saya ko nang makita ang magulang at ang bunso namin, na halos hindi ko na naisip si Axis sa pagkaabala ko sa aking pamilya, na siya namang ikinagaan nang mabigat kong pakiramdam.

I was so preoccupied with training our swimmers, revising lineups, and adjusting to the logistics of travel that I barely noticed how quickly time slipped away. Before I knew it, our send-off ceremony had arrived, and the bus waited to take us across the island.

Axis's hazel eyes met mine as he passed me in the aisle of the bus. I attempted a little grin, but he welcomed me with a nod instead, which I found too casual and impolite.

Nasanay lang siguro ako na kahit masungit at mayabang siyang makitungo sa akin noon ay hindi ito ganoon kung batiin ako.

The kids were constantly making fun of each other and laughing during the journey. I even joined in when they included me in their jokes. However, sir Makoy's fascinating topic of farming kept my attention the entire way to the cargo ship.

Our conversation veered toward business and farming, both of which piqued my attention because my family has something to do with coffee and tea plantations. He even advised me to purchase some land in Negros due to its favorable price and fertile soil.

I appreciate the mayor's efforts to help the sports teams. May nakalaan talaga itong budget para sa edukasyon ng mga bata sa lugar na ito. At kahit na pwede naman kaming bumyahe sa roro na cargo ship ay mas pinili nitong bumiyahe kami sakay ang eroplano. Pag barko kasi ay halos dalawang araw rin ang biyahe pa-Laguna.

Tinabihan ko si Arlo nang tinawag ako ni Samwell na nasusuka ito, Arlo is part of the Sepak Takraw team and swimming team, sasali ito sa 100 meter freestyle at 200 meter freestyle, kaya't kinausap ko ang coach nila na si Sir Castro na kung pwedeng gawing reserve ito ngunit dahil magaling din ay hindi pumayag na reserve lang si Arlo.

Kailangang maalagaan ang mga atleta ko. I medicated him a bit to help with his motion sickness.

"Well, I think he'll be fine if he takes a nap," Axis suggested, Arlo's between us.

Hindi ako nagsalita at saglit ko siyang tinitigan at tahimik na sinangayunan.

It was his first sentence since that summer. Somehow, I've come to miss his grating comments, harsh looks and constant need to know of how's my day going.

I nodded and offered Arlo my neck pillow. Sumandal ito sa upuan at pumikit, pareho naming pinanood si Arlo na umidlip dahilan kaya't nagkatitigan kami. Sa sandaling panahon ay hinayaan kong magkatitigan kami bago naputol iyon dahil ito ang unang nag-iwas ng tingin.

Sa isang Memorial High School kami mananatili ng isang linggo, bawat team ay mayroong classroom, ang ibang rehiyon naman ay mayroon ding ibang school na pananatilihan ng buong linggo.

Ang mga coaches na babae ay mayroong sariling silid-aralan, ang tanging kasama ng aming team ay ang mga assistant coaches.

Regional Meet was hosted at the Iloilo City Sports Complex, and every athlete felt the weight of it... the sound of drums, the parade of uniforms, the pride stitched on our patches. It wasn't just sports anymore, it was identity, it was belonging.

May mga caravan pa na may mga sakay na celebrities.

This kind of sporting event was so massive that it left me feeling completely awestruck.

Even more astonishing to me was how Axis Dmitrius Jalandon stood out among the swarm of a thousand athletes like a beacon. The realization that he is a flashing glitter came at that point. How can he stand out among other impressive athletes?

May mga nagpapakuha pa ng litarato sa kanya, may mga naririnig pa akong pinag-bubulungan at pinag-uusapan siya, branded as 'Poging Player ng Region VI.'

Unfortunately, their basketball game time conflicted with the swim team's, so I missed it.

Preliminaries pa lamang ay marami nang pasok sa aking team, dalawang babae lamang ang hindi makakausad sa meet program day.

Hindi ako nagdududa na makakapasok sina Ensel at Arlo sa finals. Sa ikatlong araw namin dito ay matatapos na rin ang swimming competition. Lima sa aking mga atleta ang may posibilidad na maguuwi ng gold, Ensel, Arlo, Jorah, Gabrielle and Bella.

Even though Arlo was towards the back of the pack to begin the 100-meter freestyle, I was pumped up when he took the second leap and sprinted by the competitor who had gotten a head start.

Napasigaw ako nang siya ang nanguna, pag-angat at paglipat nito sa akin at napayakap ako sa kanya, mabilis ang hininga niya nang may malapad na ngisi, bago ito lumapit sa taong nasa aking likuran at mahigpit na yumakap doon.

Axis, was here for the rest of the event, and I did not notice him. We are at the Laguna Sports Complex Swimming pool, while, as I remember, they had a competition this morning at the Main Complex gymnasium. Malapit lang naman at ilang minutong lakad lang naman dito, naisip ko na baka pagkatapos ng game nila at pumunta agad dito.

"Congratulations, Arlo, told you, you're gonna eat them up raw," Axis complimented, as he put his arms around Arlo's shoulder, disregarding his wet body.

Naputol lamang ang aking paninitig nang bumaling ang tingin nito sa akin matapos kay Arlo at kay Ensel.

Nawala rin ang paninitig nito nang mayroong mga atletang babaeng lumapit at nais na pagpakuha ng litarato kasama siya.

He also congratulated his cousin, Ensel and the rest of the team. Saglit ko lamang siyang tinapunan ng tingin nang magkatinginan kami, at ganoon din naman siguro ang ginawa niya.

Nang magbigayan ng award at medals ay tahimik lamang itong nakahalukipkipt sa umbrella tent kung nasaan ang team namin.

First of May is the 2015 Palarong Pambansa was a blur of heat, chants, and sunlight... the kind that baked the tracks and shimmered over the Olympic-sized pool of the Davao del Norte Sports Complex in Tagum City.

It was our first time flying that far south. For a week, the air smelled of grass, sweat, and roasted peanuts sold outside the complex. Every whistle felt like thunder. Every cheer, an echo of home.

Western Visayas was a force that year.

I remember the gold medals gleaming under the bright Tagum sun.

"You did it! Tatlo! Tatlo sa inyo! Gold!" I shouted, holding up the medal ribbons like they were lifelines.

Arlo, still dripping, laughed breathlessly.

"Tatlo agad? Eh 'di triple halo-halo!" sagot ko, laughing, tears catching at the corner of my eyes.

"Coach, promise ah! Pag balik natin sa Guimaras, treat mo kami ng halo-halo!

Arlo, in his final stroke of the 200-meter freestyle, breaking surface just milliseconds before the swimmer from Central Visayas. His time—2 minutes and 12 seconds... enough to crown him champion.

Bella, small and steady, conquered the 100-meter breaststroke, her rhythm so precise that even the officials paused in admiration.

And Ensel, part of the medley relay, claimed another gold with the team, each dive a choreography of discipline and heart.

When the results were announced, my throat hurt from screaming their names.

He might be a few centimeters taller, but the fact that he's wearing a jersey shirt that exposes his biceps and triceps when he crosses his arms makes it clear that he's put on some muscle. I bet it's because of the rigid training he had this school year.

Sa ikalimang araw namin ay nagkaroon na mumunting palaro kinagabihan at pera ang papremyo kaya't marami ang nais na makisali. Ako nama'y naisipan na lumabas ng school upang maghanap ng Mcdo at bumili ng sundae, tapos na ang dinner namin, at alas sais pa lang naman, kaya't maari pa akong lumabas bago mag-curfew ay makakabalik ako.

I ordered a hot caramel and hot fudge sundae with BFF fries. Bigla kong na-miss ang ganitong pagkain. Bitbit ang aking inorder ay naghanap ako ng mauupuan, naisip kong sa sulok ako uupo iyong hindi sa transparent wall.

And then, right there, when I got to where I wanted to sit, I noticed Axis there. His head is down and his cheeks are cupped, but I know it's him.

Pangdalawahan ang upuan ngunit kahit ganoon ay napagdesisyunan kong umupo sa harap niya, marahan itong nag-angat ng tingin na may pangungunot ang noo.

Naplantsa na lang ang pangungunot niyon nang makita ako sa harapan niya. Tipid at awkward akong ngumiti.

"Can I sit here? It's the best place to eat kasi," sabi ko, hindi na hinintay pa ang sagot niya at inalis na ang pagkain ko sa tray at inilapag sa mesa.

"If you're seeking for a seat that will keep you private, why did you choose this one? Don't you hate it when you sit close to me?" sabi niya kalaunan, talagang hinintay niyang maisubo ko ang kutsara na may sundae.

Paano niya nalaman na naghahanap ako nang mas pribadong lugar.

"I am not looking for a private place in a public area, Axis, gusto ko lang umupo sa walang masyadong tao," sabi ko.

Inilibot niya ang paningin niya sa buong lugar.

"The place isn't crowded, though," komento niya habang inililibot ang pangingin sa paligid.

Totoo naman at parang anim nga lang kaming kumakain sa oras na ito.

Napabuntong-hininga ako at nagpatuloy na lang sa pagkain.

"And I don't hate or despise you being close to me, it's just that..." sabi ko matapos manguya ang fries.

"It's just that it's too shameful to be near a student who likes you?" he interrupted softly, his tone half-serious, half-teasing. "It's not like people would even notice." Ni hindi man lang pumreno ang bibig nito.

"Hindi naman sa ganoon," sagot ko, walang mahanap na ibang sasabihin dahil mukhang tama naman siya sa sinabi niyang hindi naman malalaman ng iba ang pagkakagusto niya sa akin.

Naningkit ang mga mata niya. "Yeah, right," sabi nito.

"You sound like you're the one who hates me, based on how much you avoided me the entire school year."

Tumawa ito. "How can I hate you, miss?" Muli itong tumawa nang mahina. "I just fulfilled your wish, aren't you the one who wanted me to leave you, based on how persistent you were last summer?"

Tinitigan ko lamang siya at sumuko na lamang sa magiging susunod na naman na sagutan namin.

"Yes, but not to the point that you seemed to hate me, I'm still your teacher," sagot ko.

Mariin niya akong tinitiga. "Why, do you miss me?"

Saglit akong natigil, parang biglang nanginit ang pisngi ko, ngunit dinaan ko na lamang sa tawa.

"The swimming event is done, could you lend some of your precious time to watch basketball tomorrow?" he asked.

Tinitigan ko siya bago ako nagsalita. "Sure."

I know that over the entire year I might be extremely vocal to myself about how time benefited me after providing me the opportunity of seldom seeing Axis, but deep inside there is a secret that I always hate to admit.

I wish he would talk to me again, at least for a few minutes. And just like that, I have accepted my defeat.

Later that afternoon, I found myself at the basketball court... drawn by the sound of the crowd. Western Visayas versus CALABARZON for the finals.

Axis was unstoppable. His defense was sharp, his shots clean, his leadership unshakable. In the dying seconds, he made a three-pointer from beyond the arc — buzzer-beater.

Western Visayas erupted. The score: 82–80.

"Axis Jalandon! Player of the Game!" the announcer's voice thundered through the speakers, and the gym trembled with cheers.

When the Western Visayas delegation gathered for the closing ceremony, our flags fluttered high under the Tagum sunset. The medals glistened against our yellow-and-blue uniforms, sweat, seawind, and triumph mixed into one.

That night, as fireworks burst above the field, Axis and I crossed paths by chance near the dormitory gates.

It's hard to believe that I've missed out on seeing the physical and facial changes that have occurred in him during the past school year.