Her Stepbrother (Love Triangle)

Chapter 19

Jason

Seconds turned into minutes.

Minutes turned into hours.

Hours turned into days.

Days turned into nights.

Nights turned into weeks.

The Weeks turned into a month.

And Chelsea never came back. All of my phone calls and text messages went unanswered. Our family wasn’t any help. Every time I reached out, our family begged me to give her space.

Alas, I have lost the one person who has ever mattered to me.

Presently, I drop the divorce papers down onto the table and stare at the sticky note attached to the front with a handwritten note from my wife.

I hope one day when you’re emotionally capable of handling things, we can rekindle our friendship. Even though we failed as a couple, our friendship was valuable, irreplaceable even. I understand we both need time to adjust without emotions taking over, but please don’t hate me, Jason, and please don’t make me wait too long. I miss my best friend.

After reading the note, I swallow back the second cup of ‘Vodka,’ drinking it straight down. My body is f*****g numb. Therefore, I don’t feel the burn.

“We,” I yell into the empty room as I punch the desk.

“I didn’t make this decision to divorce; you did,” I spoke out loud to myself as if Chelsea was standing in front of me.

Suddenly, the pain of losing her becomes too much, and I drop to my knees, wiping at the stupid f*****g tears that seem to keep falling.

At the moment, I continue to stare at the divorce papers elaborating on whether I should sign them or tear them to pieces.

My heart is shattered, and it f*****g hurts. All I wanted was for her to be happy.

Why couldn’t she be happy with me as I was with her?

I definitely cannot sign these papers until I see her one more time. If we are saying goodbye, then we will do it the proper way.

As I scan through the divorce papers with blurry f*****g eyes, I notice an address. Directly, I slip the divorce papers into my back pocket, driving straight to the address on the papers.

I should have tried harder.

I should have fought harder.

I should have tried to be the man she deserved. Now, I’m afraid it’s too f*****g late.

My jealousy was uncontrollable. Truthfully, I couldn’t have controlled it. I tried. But, I failed.

Every day since she had left, I lay in bed at night and imagined her with him. For some f*****g reason, Kevin will always be in the back of my mind.

He’s permanently tattooed on my f*****g brain, and I cannot erase him, regardless of how hard I f*****g tried, too.

I saw how he f*****g looked at her. Kevin looks at her the same way I do. Sometimes, I swear she looks at him the same way unless it’s my f*****g imagination playing evil little tricks on me.

Perhaps I came off a bit too strong, but love f*****g blinded me. All I could think about was f*****g losing her to him.

Pulling into the driveway, I hop out of my car and knock on the door.

Chelsea’s eyes widen. “Jason.” She sighs, “Come in.”

Cautiously, I glance around, taking in the small apartment Chelsea made a home. Although she had gotten her own place, it doesn’t feel like home. “I’m not signing these,” I admit, as I pin her with my eyes, hoping she doesn’t want this.

Chelsea casts a veiled glance my way. “Please sign them, Jason. I don’t want this anymore.” She says, tiredly.

“What don’t you want, Chelsea?” I ask as I stalk closer. “Us?”

She fights back the tears as she speaks. “I cannot revolve my life around yours, Jason. I’m not happy with you, and I won’t live my life every day, worrying about if you will grow jealous or not.”

My eyes well with tears as I grab her into my arms. “I made a promise never to let you go, Chelsea. It was supposed to be us against the world.” I remind her.

Chelsea buries her forehead into my chest. “You don’t have to let me go. We can be best friends, Jason. We had the best friendship before we took our friendship to the next level.”

I don’t understand how she has faith that we could rekindle our friendship.

There is no way in hell I could watch Chelsea with another man, smiling, and living her life with somebody other than me. Especially not after I had the pleasure of knowing her intimately.

“Give me another chance, Chelsea.” I plead, desperately.

“I can’t Jason.” She draws away from me and hugs herself, “I need for you to sign those papers Jason. I have given you chance after chance to trust me, and you haven’t. Kevin will always be around because he is family. And I refuse to argue with you each time I visit him.” She breathes, deeply. “I can’t do it anymore.”

I storm forward and take hold of her throat. “We promised each other forever.”

Chelsea squeaks. “You’re terrifying me, Jason.” She cries as my grip tightens, and my rage blooms.

“Get your f*****g hands off her,” I twist around faster than lightning. “I thought he left?”

“He—“Chelsea attempts to speak.

However, Kevin interrupts her, “No more explaining yourself Chelsea.” Anger flashes in Kevin’s eyes as he speaks, “You tell that jealous motherfucker to go find a big rock, and f*****g kick it.”

I stare at Chelsea with disgust, “Is he the f*****g reason you want me to sign these divorce papers?” I question as I wave the divorce papers around in the air.

“No,” she says, as she wipes indignantly at her tears, “I’m young Jason, and so are you. Obviously, we made a mistake by marrying too young. I won’t be that doting wife who stays in the house too afraid to leave. And, that’s how I felt. I needed to depend on myself instead of on everybody around me. Plus, your aggression is really scaring me, and I’m afraid you’ll hurt me.”

“Yourself?” I snicker sarcastically. “Then why the f**k is he here? Have you f****d him?”

Chelsea storms toward me and slaps me. Something she’s seemed to make a habit of, yet she’s afraid I’ll hurt her. Hilarious.

“I haven’t f****d him, Jason. And, even if I did, it wouldn’t be any of your business. I won’t give that power to you, and allow you to control me.” She tucks her hair behind her ear. “It’s over Jason. I should have left you long before now. Please sign the papers.” She slides her back down the wall until her bottom hits the floor, “I’m not happy with you, Jason. And I haven’t been for a while.”

I kneel in front of the woman I love and lift her chin to stare into her beautiful deep blue eyes, and all I see is pain.

Evidently, it’s pain I’ve caused.

I have allowed my jealousy to change me into a person I don’t even recognize. “I’m sorry, Chelsea.” I choke on a sob. “If this is what you want, I’ll give it to you.” It’s the last thing I want to do, but for her, I will.

She climbs onto her knees and hits me. Only this time she doesn’t stop. She continues to slap me as she speaks, “You’ll give me a divorce, you f*****g asshole!” She continues to pound on my chest with her fist, “But, you couldn’t give me your f*****g trust.” Chelsea drops to the floor and cries.

Her body shakes with f*****g tears. Her cries reverberate through her entire f*****g apartment. “I will give you anything you want, Chelsea, including my trust,” I inform her, hoping she will come back to me.

Kevin comes over and comforts Chelsea, “Calm down, Sister,” I notice a sad smile appear on his face as he attempts to joke.

“Sign the papers, Jason.” Chelsea pleads.

I nod, observing Kevin holding Chelsea, realizing I’ve f****d up countless times, and I have chased her into the arms of another man.

Angrily, I scribble my name on the f*****g papers and sling them onto the floor.

I’ll never marry again as long as I live.

If this is love, I want no part of it.

Presumably, I thought our break up was temporary, and after some space, she would have come home.

Absolutely, I regret not spending more quality time with her and showing her how much I love her.

Instead of showing her out of anger, I should have reminded her daily.

The only time I seemed to show her how much I loved her, is when I was angry. And now I regret it.

I took Chelsea for granted once we became a couple and forgot to show her the world, as I promised.

And, now it’s too f*****g late.

I should have given her all my f*****g trust because deep down I knew she wouldn’t f**k him, but the beast inside me has a habit of f*****g overreacting.

I realize it has a lot to do with my childhood, though I should have kept my relationship separated from my parents.

Indubitably, I allowed my past to destroy my future, and because of that, I have nothing.

Fuck the money, house, and cars, because without Chelsea, none of that s**t f*****g matters.

She took my heart, and my soul, and I’ll never love another the way I loved her.

If I could take every f*****g mistake back, I would. Unfortunately, I can’t.

I’ll have to learn to breathe again. Because without her, breathing will seem f*****g impossible.

All the anger of watching Kevin, hold my wife, has faded.

I did this.

It’s my fault.

And, now I’m suffering for it.

I close her door, easily, and allow the regrets to swallow me alive.

It’s too late to think about what I should’ve or could’ve done differently because I just signed all my f*****g happiness away.

I let out a loud cry, as the rain beats down on my face, hiding the tears.

It’s over.

My marriage is over.

I scream again, for what I had, and will no longer have. And, it f*****g hurts.

Oh, God does it hurt.

If I had another chance, I would make everything better and show her she meant the world to me.

Again, I let out another cry, sounding like a p***y. And, I don’t give a f**k. I signed my heart away when I signed my f*****g name on that paper.

How the f**k do I learn to live without the one person I cannot picture a life without?