ALMOST YOU

Room 521

CELESTE

We watched the car until it disappear around the bend, swallowed by the canopies of ancient oaks that lined the driveway and i released a deep breath.

“Okay. I really am doing this”. I muttered under my breath and just then Flora grabbed my hands.

“Come on”. She said brightly with a smile plastered on her face as she pulled me away from the window.

Before I could ask what she was doing, she pulled me into the middle of the common room and started dancing, her arms flailing around and hips swaying as she hummed a tune.

"What are you doing?". I asked, laughing despite myself.

"How do you feel?". Flora twirled me . "Right now. In this moment. How do you feel?”.

I took a moment to consider the question.

My father was gone.

I was standing in a dorm room I'd never seen before, in a town I barely remembered.

"I don't know”. I said honestly with a sigh. “I just feel like . . like I could do anything “.

Flora stopped dancing and grabbed my shoulders, her fierce hazel eyes locking with mine.

"That's it, girl." She patted my shoulder. "That's the energy. Hold onto that."

She pulled out her phone, tapped the screen a few times and suddenly an energizing music with beats that pulsed with energy filled the room, the kind of music that makes you want to throw your hands open and dance the night away.

Flora started dancing to the music and then pulled me into the center of the room, swaying her hips, throwing her head back and singing along to words she clearly knew by heart.

I stood frozen for a moment , my arms at my sides, feet rooted to the floor. The music pulsed around me and Flora's bubbly laughter wrapped around me like a blanket.

“Come on girl, let go”. Flora mouthed, reaching for my hands.

I took a deep breath.

And let go.

I started moving to the beats clumsily at first, then less so.

My cream sweater twisted around my waist as I turned and twirled to the music, my beanie falling in the motion and my unruly waves of thick and voluminous auburn curls came loose and bounced with every movement.

We were giggling now , both of us breathless and so full of something I couldn’t name.

It felt like freedom.

It felt like flying.

It felt like the girl I should have been.

"When you're young, you can do anything”. The singer declared, and at that moment I believe her.

The song ended too soon.

We slid onto the couch together, chests heaving and cheeks flushed, the throw pillows scattered around us like fallen leaves.

Flora's olive green jacket was unzipped, her messy bun coming loose. My white sneakers were scuffed from dancing on the hardwood floor and my auburn curls were all around my face.

"I think we should probably start arranging our stuffs”. I said after a while of us catching our breath.

"Yeah." Flora nodded, pushing herself up.

She held out a hand and I took it as she helped me up.

"Do you need help?". Flora asked, gesturing toward my door.

"Nope. I 've got it." I smiled and pushed open the door , my palm caressing the nameplate for a second with a smile of satisfaction.

The room was perfect.

It was smaller than I'd imagined but in a cozy way, not a cramped one.

A single bed sat against the far wall, dressed in crisp white sheets and a navy blue quilt that matched the curtains.

A desk stood beneath the window, empty except for a small lamp with a brass base. A closet with mirrored doors took up the opposite wall and a corkboard hung above the desk, waiting for memories.

But the window and the perfect view it provided was everything.

I crossed the room and pushed it open, letting the cool afternoon air sweep inside. The view stretched across the campus , rolling lawns, brick buildings with slate roofs and a clock tower in the distance.

Students milled about below, moving in and out of buildings, their laughter drifting up with the breeze.

“This is my room”. I thought with a smile as I sat on the bed watching the bustling view below . “My space. My life”.

Unpacking was slow work , not because I had too much, but because I wanted to savor every moment of this life of mine.

I hung my clothes in the closet, placed my books and hardcovers on the desk then I pulled out the small frame I'd wrapped in a sweater for safekeeping.

My mother.

The photo was an old one ,taken many years ago at a beach somewhere with my mother laughing in it, head thrown back and her face tilted toward the sun.

I caressed the frame with a smile. She was indeed a pretty woman but I had just few recollection of her because I was still young when she died.

She had this beautiful face and a pretty smile that Dad claimed I’ve inherited and we even have the same unruly, voluminous auburn waves.

The same auburn curls that refused to be tamed, always spiraling in every direction like they had a mind of their own.

My mother had tried to straighten hers once , from the story she'd told me with a laugh and had later given up, declaring that wild hair was a sign of a wild heart and she'd rather keep both.

I pinned the photo to the corkboard above my desk.

“There”. I grinned, satisfied. “Now you're here too”.

I stepped back to admire it for a while before I returned to my suitcase and retrieved the last item which was a worn blue journal with a cracked leather cover and pages that has softened with constant flipping.

The spine was creased in a dozen places and a silk ribbon bookmark trailed from between the pages .

I'd had it for years. Had written in it during hospital stays and sleepless nights and the long afternoons when the world felt too heavy to face.

I sat on the bed and opened it slowly and the page fell open to the middle, a section I’ve visited hundred times before.

I ran my fingers over the words, tracing the loops of my own handwriting.

My secret.

My promise.

My reasons for getting out of bed every morning.

"Yes”. I whispered to myself, smiling. "This is now accomplished."

I reached for a pen to tick it off.

"Hey!". The door suddenly flew open and Flora burst in, all energy and noise, scaring me so bad I jumped and the journal slipped from my hands.

And the page i was about to tick fluttered loose and drifted toward the floor.

Right toward Flora's feet.

"I'm sorry”. Flora said, bending down to pick up the paper. Her voice was awkward and apologetic. "I didn't mean to scare you."

My breath caught in my throat as I watched her picked up the page and scanned through it.

My heart hammered against my ribs as I awkwardly shifted my gaze down to the quilt, waiting for the barrage of questions she was sure to ask.

But the questions didn't come.

I raised my head slowly, confused. My auburn curls fell across my face and I tucked them behind my ear with a trembling hand.

Flora was smiling.

Not the pity, sad smile I was expecting but a smile that made me questioned if she understood what she saw on the page.

My eyebrow lifted in confusion . "What?"

Flora climbed onto the bed, settling cross-legged across from me. She placed the paper between us on the quilt, smoothing out the creases with gentle fingers.

"Actually”. Flora said. "I already know. About all of it."

I stared at her. "What?".

"Your Dad explained everything to me when you guys arrived in town." Her voice was gentle. "He wanted me to know, so I could look out for you. So I'd understand if something happened."

My throat tightened.

"I'm sorry”. I whispered. "I just couldn't bring myself to . .”

"Hey." Flora reached across and took my hand. "It's okay. I don't blame you at all."

I looked up.

Flora's eyes were steady.

"And listen to me”. She continued, squeezing my fingers. "That doesn't define you. You'd be a fool to let it and fortunately enough . . “. She grinned. "You don't seem like one."

I felt relief shoot up through me at her words and let Flora pull me into a hug and for a moment, neither of us spoke.

"I just didn't want to ruin everything”. I murmured into her shoulder. "You know?".

"I understand." Flora pulled back, holding me at arm's length. "And you didn't ruin anything. Believe me, I’m glad I know. It would have hurt so much more if I'd found out under different circumstances ."

I smiled and wiped at my eyes with the back of my hand.

"So”. I said, my voice teasing. “You're like my caretaker now?".

Flora laughed. "With the only exception that I'm not some rigid old-aged woman." She shook her body dramatically at the last part. "My only rule for you is to live, girl."

"And that's why I'm here." I shrugged, smiling.

Then I frowned at a sudden realization.

"Wait." I sat up straighter. "Did you change dorm rooms because of me then?".

Flora's cheeks flushed. “No, actually. That's another story."

"Keeping secrets?". I reached out and tickled Flora's side.

Flora squirmed, laughing. "No! We're taking turns. So it's your’s first."

"Well." I gestured vaguely at the paper on the quilt . "That's my only big secret."

Flora glanced at the paper, then back at me. "So this is the list?"

I nodded.

"We'll get it all done." She said it like a promise. Like a fact. “Believe me”.

“I do”. I smiled and picked up the paper, folded it carefully and tucked it back into the middle of my journal.

Then I placed the journal on my desk before turning back to her. "Now it's your turn to spill."

Flora groaned. "You're not going to let me go, are you?".

"Nope."

"Fine." Flora flopped back onto the bed, staring at the ceiling. "So, I changed my room to here. I was downstairs before but I moved partly because I wanted us to be in the same dorm." She paused. "And also because . ."

"Because what?".

"I specifically chose room 521”.

I frowned. "Why? What's special about it?".

Flora's cheeks flushed again. “Apparently, someone I have a crush on is in Room 520. In the boys' dorm."

I tilted my head, still not getting her point . "So?".

Flora stared at me. "You really don't know?".

"Know what?".

"Wow." Flora sat up, shaking her head. "You really are a naive one, Sweetheart." She sighed dramatically. "In case you didn't know, 520 and 521 are literally the internet code for 'I love you' in the most populous nation on earth.”

I blinked. "Oh."

"Yeah. And also, apart from that, there’s some sort of legend.”

I tilted my head. "A legend?".

Flora's eyes gleamed with excitement as she leaned in closer.

"Apparently, every year, some of the students that occupies Room 520 in the boys' dorm and Room 521 in the girls' dorm, they always end up together. It's been happening for years. It's like… a curse. Or a blessing. Depending on however you choose look at it."

I stared at her. "You're joking."

"I'm not." Flora's voice was serious now. "It’s been a thing years ago, even though the school doesn't advertise it, but everyone knows. People have been trying to get those rooms for years. They're the most requested rooms in the entire school."

“Wow”. I blinked. "So you didn't just choose this room to be close to me?".

Flora's cheeks went scarlet. "I mean… partly. But also . ."

"You wanted to be in the room that guarantees you'll end up with your crush."

Flora buried her face in her hands. "It sounds so stupid when you say it like that."

"No”. I said, laughing. "It sounds romantic. And a little bit crazy. But mostly romantic."

"Romantic indeed." Flora buried her face in her hands. "I can't believe I just told you that."

I tugged Flora's hands away from her face. "Wait. Is that a blush I see?".

"Get off me, bitch." Flora shoved me, but she was laughing.

"So what's he like?". I pressed. "Your Prince Charming?".

Flora snorted. "Believe me, Beckett is far from being a Prince Charming. I'd rather say a fallen angel. And I don't mind him taking me down alongside him."

"Wow."

"Yeah." Flora's voice softened. "He's on the school hockey team. One of the most popular guys in school and the hottest, if we're being honest."

"So does he reciprocate your feelings?".

Flora laughed. "Oh, Beckett never likes anyone. Except his guys, he’s such a sucker. But that doesn't stop me from chasing him."

"Chasing him?".

"Yeah, darling Cece." Flora reached over and tucked a strand of my auburn curls behind my ear. "Knowing what you want and going for it are two different things."

"Wow." I shook my head. "Attagirl."

"Enough about me." Flora stood up, brushing off her leggings. "The evening’s reality show is about to start. Let's go watch it together in the living room."

"Sure."

-————

Thirty minutes into the reality show, a knock came at the door and opened before either of us could respond.

A girl stepped inside.

She had straight black hair that fell past her shoulders, parted in the middle. She was decked in a dark jeans, a grey sweater and sneakers that looked like they'd never been scuffed. She carried a small duffel bag and moved like she didn't want anyone to notice her.

"Hello”. She said quietly, her voice barely above a whisper. "I'm Zara."

Flora waved. "Hey! I'm Flora and this is Celeste ."

Zara nodded, her eyes flickering between us, then away.

"Nice to meet you”. She murmured and turned toward the door with her name on it.

Zara Finch.

She disappeared inside quietly and closed the door behind her. Flora and I exchanged a glance.

"She'll warm up”. I said.

Flora raised an eyebrow. "Or she won't."

"Optimist."

"Realist."