Depression's End, Young Love's Start

Chapter 6

Those words hit me like a punch to the gut. It felt like every part of me had been knocked out of place.

A second later, my stomach clenched so hard I thought I'd be sick.

I grabbed the wall beside me and dry-heaved over and over.

Fernando's face shifted with worry. He reached out to steady me.

I held up a hand to stop him. "I'm fine. It's just my stomach acting up. I've had this forever. A couple of pills will fix it."

I pulled the pills out of my bag and swallowed them down. I felt back to normal pretty quickly.

For the rest of the shoot, I went along with everything perfectly.

The chemistry between us read really well on camera. The director looked more than satisfied.

But as soon as filming wrapped, Fernando said a quick goodbye to the crew, turned around, and I was already gone.

In my car, I stared at Brandon's contact on my phone for a long time. Finally, I put it away, closed my eyes, and tried to rest.

Tears slipped down my face, but I couldn't even name what I was crying for.

I just felt hopeless.

I didn't even have the courage to confront Brandon about any of it.

At this point, I had no idea what we even were anymore.

Had we broken up?

I felt dazed, lost in my own head.

When my depression flared up, I always had trouble holding onto clear memories.

Isaac looked worried. He hesitated for a beat, then spoke up. "We're supposed to tape the The Darnell Show 10th anniversary special, the day after tomorrow. But with how you're feeling right now... maybe we should just back out."

Brandon and Gloria would be there, too, promoting their new movie.

We'd barely crossed paths once in an entire year before. Now, in just a few months, I'd run into Brandon on three different shows.

I shook my head slowly. "Mr. Knox invited me personally. I can't say no to him."

Darnell had looked out for me ever since I first stepped into the industry.

*****

I arrived early on the taping day of The Darnell Show.

Funny enough, Brandon and I had first met on the very first episode of this show, ten years prior.

Back then, I was a brand-new singer, and Brandon was just a small-time actor.

I chatted with Darnell for a little while before Brandon finally showed up, running late.

Darnell pulled him into a warm, friendly hug.

When they pulled apart, Brandon held out a hand like nothing was out of the ordinary. "Ms. Morrow, it's been a long time."

I froze. I'd automatically leaned in for a real hug, but Brandon only gave me a quick, light squeeze before stepping back half a step.

It was like we were nothing more than casual old friends.

My arms hung empty, and it felt like a hollow spot opened up right in my chest.

I pulled my hands back awkwardly and finally answered, "Yeah."

Brandon turned away like it was nothing and went to greet someone else.

I stared at his back, and a sharp, sudden pain stabbed through my heart.

We'd been the closest two people could be. When had we grown this far apart?

The theme of this episode was chasing old memories.

Brandon and I got put on the same team, just like we had ten years ago.

Our task was to go back to the shops we'd visited back then and find something tied to that ten-year-old memory. If we came up empty, we'd get a punishment.

We found the old candy shop pretty quickly.

I looked at the newly renovated storefront, and a nervous flutter settled in my stomach.

But the second I tasted one of the candies, my eyes lit up.

A warm feeling I hadn't felt in forever filled my chest.

I picked up a piece and held it out to Brandon's mouth, my voice a little shaky. "It tastes exactly like it did ten years ago."

Brandon didn't take it from my hand. He grabbed a different piece for himself and popped it in his mouth.

A second later, he frowned. "Way too sweet."

He then spat the candy out.

I stared, confused, like I was trying to convince myself more than him. "It's exactly the same. You used to say this was your favorite flavor."

Brandon sounded totally casual, like he was stating a fact. "You're remembering wrong. I never liked sweet stuff."

I froze.

Suddenly, it all came back. Ten years ago, right here in this same shop, Brandon had grinned at me, fake-surprised. "No way. Everything you like? I like it, too."

The memory twisted in my chest, raw and sharp.

It hurt so bad it felt like it was tearing me open from the inside.

"Yeah." My smile was so bitter it ached. "Guess it was just me who liked it."

We couldn't find our old memory.

This was a game we were always going to lose.

We headed back to the meeting point.

That was when I found out we weren't the only losing team. Gloria's team had lost, too.

Gloria pouted. "How old was I ten years ago? I don't have any memories from back then."

When she saw the punishment—eating 50x spicy curry—she looked even more annoyed.

I frowned at the spicy food, too. My stomach had just acted up earlier. If I ate this, I'd never make it through the rest of the taping.

Just then, the host announced that Brandon had won a "get out of punishment free" card in an earlier game. He could use it to save either Gloria or me from the spicy curry.

It was so obvious that the show was stirring up drama on purpose.

Gloria and I stood side by side.

Brandon held the card, a helpless smile on his face.

He glanced over at me.

My heart started pounding so hard I could hear it.

Then Brandon said, his voice apologetic, "Sorry, Ms. Morrow. She's got a weaker stomach."

The next second, he turned to look at Gloria, a warm, fond lilt in his voice. "Come here, pumpkin."