Ayla
Six months wasn’t a long time, but it was long enough for habits to turn into character.
My days ran neatly. I showed up to campus on time, sat in the same rows, took notes I never reread. My grades stayed solid. My face stayed calm. Professors said my name without concern. No one ever asked where I went the night before.
I never looked messy in the wrong places.
My nights began after the sun fully disappeared. Loud music. Flickering lights. Cold glasses that made my head feel light before my thoughts could protest. I learned how to drink without grimacing, how to laugh at the right moments, how to go home without looking back.
There was no tragedy once I was drunk. No dramatic moment that came with it. I just grew quieter and stopped caring.
I knew how to look alive without act
