What About My Forever?

Chapter 6 Dinner and A Walk

Louise's POV

I watch her eyes move across the words in each sentence as I start chopping up the veggies to add to the meal. "That's amazing, honey! I'm so proud of you!" My mother declares as her hand clings to her chest. Crumbling some of the paper within it as she starts to cough and hunch over, looking like she is wrenching in pain.. Maybe this was just too much excitement all at once. Regret covers me as I bolt over to her side, making sure I don't overwhelm her with all of this information.

The fear was struck within me as my sister, May, remained standing but glaring over at me. I am not sure if she blames this reaction on me and my information as I do, or if she is jealous of the news I have brought. Either way, I don't care as to her reasoning right now, there are more important things to worry about. My mother's grip on the paper and her chest loosen as she tries to flatten it out, I just take it from her hand and place it on the table beside her, showing my concern is for her and not the paper crumpled in her tight grip.

"You're seriously considering taking this job?" May asks with a distaste in her tone that gets my eyebrows furrowing as soon as that obsurd question hits my ears. "Of course I am.. This is a great opportunity for me. Plus they really didn't give me a choice in the matter." I state with more confidence in myself and how definent the situation is. Her scoffing in response to my comment is all I need to hear to send a glare right back at her.

"I can't believe you would work for the people who are hurting so many right now. That makes you just as bad as them!" My sister spats at me as I rub my palm over my mother's back, hating how my sister only cares about what she is supposedly passionate about and nothing else. My eyes roll before turning my attention where it needs to be right now, at my hurting mother. "Ma? Are you ok? Do you need anything? Water?" I ask with panic, just wanting to help as she shakes her head automatically.

"I'm fine, my dear.. Thank you." I keep rubbing her back as she starts shaking her head before trying to reach my hands, but when she can't do that she just points to the food that is still cooking before pinching the bridge of her nose. "I'm fine, Lou.. Get back to the food. I need some space to breathe and don't want that to burn." She tries to demand this of me, but it's hard to take it like that with her words sounding so weak as they squeaked out.

"Yeah, you wouldn't want to burn dinner.. I'm starving." The seemingly ungrateful May snaps at me as I huff out, just wanting to punch her in the face but knowing I can't without hurting my mom by the stress it would cause. I slowly stand, keeping my worried gaze on my mother as I back up and go back to the cooking food to stir it around. I keep looking back as I try to change the subject from the negativity my sister brought out.

"They told me I would start on Monday.. So I was hoping I could borrow your car to get me there, since I don't have the means for transportation anymore." I explain to her as she instantly nods at that question until my sister snaps once again. "I wanted the car then!" I let out an annoyed breath, trying to hold back the annoyance that is about ready to turn into anger if she doesn't stop poking at me.. I can tell she has had a bad day, but that doesn't mean she can take it out on me.

"Why would you need the car if you don't work? In my mind, that automatically makes my needs more important than yours, since mine support our family.. And yours... well, I am not sure what yours does." I snap right back at her in defiance, but keeping my eyes on the sizzling food while I feel her eyes boring into the back of my skull. "I had plans... that's all you need to know." She spats at me through clenched teeth.

"Lou needs the car more than you do to meet with Steven.. Lou needs to make a good first impression with this military base.. So she will use the car as long as she makes sure to put gas into it." My mother defends me in this, thankfully. I vigorously nodded my head, sending a victorious smirk to my sister before looking back to the food. My sister's heated glare is burrowing into the back of my head, making me nervous, even though I don't think she would do anything to me.

She knows she has lost this because my mother doesn't want her to see that man who is the leader of the little hoodlums group, any more than I do. I finish up cooking as I plate up the food, sliding it on the table in front of my mother and sister to shut her up. "Let me get you your medicine first, Ma." Quickly, I turned and crossed the house, making my way to the bathroom cabinet to grab my mother's medicine bottles. I get each pill she needs, putting it into a little cup before coming right back to her side in no time at all.

"Here, Ma.. take these with your food so you don't get sick." I declare filling up her cup with water as I watch her take the pills, throwing them into the back of her throat followed by the water. She swallows and then nods at me as I smile and state. "I'm going to get changed.. I told the girls I would go out with them tonight in celebration of my new job.. You're more than welcome to join as long as you're going to be nice to me and my friends." I explain to May, making sure she understands the ground rules of this.

My sister huffs out thinking about that. "I wanted to see my friends." she says under her breath as I shrug my shoulders. "I just knew you had a lot of fun the last time you went out with us, and we could do that again," I explain to her making her look even more annoyed at that idea.. But I know she had fun with us she told me so many times so she can act annoyed all she wants. That doesn't change what I already know.

"Fine. You're not wrong. It was fun.. When I had nothing else going on. But I might not be staying long, Steven said he was going to be there tonight to have a drink with friends to get them off of his back, and that was it." I roll my eyes but hoping that maybe he won't show up at all because he has ditched his plans with and without her many times before. So maybe we can distract her even if he shows up.

"Fine." I spat, crossing my arms as I shook my head and walked past to my small closet of a room. I strip down taking a quick shower, knowing I don't have a ton of time to spare. Once I'm out and dried, I pull out my favorite dress. It's dark blue with little bits of red and white to add some flair to it. I slip on my white gloves over each hand before I put some light makeup on, pinning some of my hair up, making it look like it might be curled, but I know it's not. I reached for my favorite red hat to match, placing my large brimmed, saucer-like hat over my still-wet hair.

I move it around, placing it perfectly while slipping my shoes on just as fast, feeling great about my effectiveness in this urgency. I got way more done than I thought. I look towards the mirror before giving myself a once-over. I like what I see and feel good about this look. I start leaving my room just to see my mother slowly pushing the wheels of her wheelchair through the house. It's a struggle for her to do this, so, without hesitation, I grab the handles on her wheelchair, helping lead her over to her room.

Once we get beside her bed, I help lift her so she can sit down on the edge of her bed. I walk around her room, grabbing pajamas for her to change into, but as I grab her shirt to help her change, she quickly stops me with her hand on my arm. "Lou, thank you.. but I am fine to do this on my own.. Go and have some fun, you deserve it for working so hard and doing such a good job.. I'll see you in the morning." She declares, pointing me out of the room.

I'm sure it's hard not having all the independence that she used to, so I try to respect her feelings as much as I can. I lean in kissing the top of her head as I state, "Ok.. Whatever you want.. I love you, Ma.. See you soon." She nods as I leave the room, seeing my sister dressed and ready, waiting for me by the front door as she tightens the ascot around her neck. "You ready to have a fun girl's night?" I ask in an upbeat tone as she reluctantly nods her head, which is all I need to get this night started.

I just walk past, not trying to argue with her, I want her to have fun with us, showing her there is more to life than her rebellious friends. She quickly hops to, following me as we start our walk down the next couple of streets to Mary's house, since she doesn't live too far away from us. Nothing is said between us, which makes things hard for trying to get into a good mood, but hopefully, that will change when we get to the house filled with fun women.

Seeing the all too familiar blue house and white front door. I prance up to it with excitement in my steps, just needing the drinks and friends to really help me feel good about this next step. I want this, but I am terrified, I have a feeling in the pit of my stomach telling me that there is so much more to come, and that alone scares the heck out of me. So I get to the front door, banging my fist on the outside of it, trying to make sure she can hear me since I can clearly hear the music blaring out of her barely cracked-open windows.

When there is no answer, I bang on the door again, but nothing happens until I hear something pinging against the glass. I looked over to my side, just to see my sister pegging her windows above with pebbles to hopefully get her attention. But I don't want her to break the window. Backing up to get a better look at the window above, I lightly slap the side of her arm to get her attention. "Stop before you break something." I state the obvious for her as she just ignores me and continues to do this.

I nervously stare at every rock flying over me, colliding with the glass of the window, just hoping I don't see any of the glass cracking after each attempt. I inch forward to knock, but this time with a panic in each hit, just hoping she will hear it before something bad happens. I watch another pebble fly past me, but this time, it makes it through the little bit of open window to Mary's room.

My eyes widen with Mays as we look back and forth between one another before looking back at the open window. I think we are both just hoping that no one was hit in this last attempt. Since we are both in shock, we stop what we are doing until the window swings open to expose Mary's beautifully smiling face. She looks out to see us as she waves, then claps in excitement before she makes her way down the stairs and to the front door.

"Hey, we we're just talking about you two! We we're hoping you would come too May!! Good to see you.. And wow.. You both look spectacular!" she declares, leaving the door open for us to follow into the house behind her. "We were getting worried about you, Louie! I thought we were going to have to stop on by your house to drag you out with us." Mary states over her shoulder before smiling at us again.

"Are you ladies just ready and waiting for us?" I ask curiously while following her up the stairs and to her room, with May on my heels. "Not exactly, just finishing up." She replies before pushing the bedroom door open, exposing the girls in the midst of getting ready. We enter the room with Mary holding the door for us in a welcoming way as we prance past her and to her bed where I push my dress out and plop down, bouncing for a moment, smiling at my friends.

I can feel the bed behind me moving as I watch May doing the same. "Well, we're almost ready to go.. I just need my shoes, and Margaret was finishing her makeup.. Then we will head out.. So.. May what brings you here tonight? Are you finally going to join us again? It's been months since the last time and we had so much fun then." Mary declares to her as she scoffs at that, getting the other girls attention which makes her look a little nervous about what she wants to say.

"No, not exactly joining. Uh.. There is this guy that I'm kinda sorta seeing within my group of friends.. And he is going to be there tonight, so I wanted to surprise him with my presence since he was sad, thinking I wouldn't be able to join, since Ma was out of gas and I had no money to get some." She states, embarrassing me since my friends like hanging out with her, but she is making it seem as if she doesn't even like them or hanging out with them.

Worse yet, she is making it sound as if she is only here for the ride.. And if that is the case, then she shouldn't have come. The girls and I look back and forth between each other as I send an empathetic look in my eyes to my friends, before mouthing the words Sorry right after. "Ok then.. That, um.. Sounds good.. Too." Eloise states nervously looking back at us as they finish up with getting ready, and we all stand together to get going.

We prance down the stairs quickly one after the other, with a pep in all of our steps before piling into Mary's car. We know it's a tight fit, but Mary is the only one of us who has a car.. We are working and trying to survive on our own, so carpooling is always the best way to get around with friends. That's what I will probably miss the most when transferring to this new job. The time we spend talking and hanging out is what always makes my mind feel at ease in these stressful times. But everything happens for a reason, I just hope it's a good one when making this big of a change.